Round Eighteen #2
Like an angler reeling in his catch, he tugs on my shirt and draws me another inch closer.
“I wanna say I’m sorry for always picking fights with you.
That I’m sorry for being too proud all the damn time.
That I’m sorry you think I’m a jackass, because mostly I’m not.
I mean…” His eyes twinkle with mirth. “I can be, and I have loads of practice, which means I’m pretty good at it.
You probably don’t believe me, but I can actually be decent company sometimes.
You just keep catching my asshole moods. ”
“Sounds like a flaw on your part.” I swallow the thick, choking lump of nerves settled in my throat. “Emotional regulation is sexy. Arguing all the time is not.”
“Right.” He inches just a little closer, his nose almost touching mine.
“Accountability is also sexy, so this is me owning up to my shit. I’m an overworked and underpaid cop.
People don’t like me, purely because I have a badge, and those who don’t have an opinion on the matter are typically already dead.
I’m a single dad who caught the short end of a shitty stick, my son’s middle name should have been Knievel, and because he has a thing for crazy stunts, I’m sometimes considered an uninterested, uninvolved dad, when really, that’s not true. He’s just faster than I am.”
“I don’t think you’re uninterested or uninvolved.
” Accountability is sexy, Magnolia! “Well… I judged you at first,” I admit.
“Because we got off to a terrible start, and you’d pissed me off.
But Jeremy’s an amazing kid, and kids don’t grow up like that unless they have guidance from people who really care. ”
“I want you to tell me you’re interested, too.” He drags his bottom lip between his teeth. “I want you to look me in the eye and tell me you’re curious. You keep setting me up with these women—three in a single week—but I don’t want them. I’ve been clear about it since day one.”
“You’ve been clear about your feelings toward love,” I rasp, the beep of his phone chiming from somewhere in the room. Not a call, but texts. One, two, three in a row. “Toward dating. You want to get laid and nothing more.”
“I know what I sa—”
“So when you say you’re interested in me, your interest only goes as far as getting laid. It’s all about sex for you.”
“Right.”
Right.
I sigh.
His eyes flare wide. “No! Wait. That’s not what I—”
“It’s okay.” I press my palm to his pounding chest and force a small smile.
“I’m not interested in sleeping with my client, and even if you’d changed your mind on the relationship stuff, it would be wildly unprofessional for me to date the man I’m working so hard to set up with someone else.
” I drop my hand and take a step back. “I’m gonna go downstairs.
Let you boys finish getting ready. You need to brush your hair.
Maybe consider swinging by the barber sometime soon, because it’s getting a little long. I’ll see you in a bi—”
He grabs my wrist and yanks me back, then he slams his lips to mine.
My breath explodes on a gasp, and tears form in my eyes. Emotion clogs my throat, cutting off my air and starving the rest of my body. My phone beeps again. It vibrates. Then the single chime turns into an incoming call, and all the while, Billy’s lips crush mine.
They don’t move. They don’t taste or seduce. They do nothing except claim, the way a greedy child claims a toy in a sandbox.
I wanted this for so long. Needed it. Wished upon a star for it.
But now that I have it, my heart shatters at the realization it’s nothing like younger-me expected.
When I give him nothing but statue stillness and apathy, he disconnects our lips and rests his forehead against mine. “You were supposed to kiss me back.” Breathless, his eyes flicker between mine. “If I kiss you, you kiss back. Then you’ll realize I don’t need to go out on these dates anymore.”
“So it’s all a game?” My heart aches as I swipe the back of my hand across my lips, then I turn my hand over and spy Elson’s name on my screen.
Work. Always work. “You think kissing me will ruin my plans?” I bring my eyes back to Billy’s.
“That it’ll get you out of this prize you’re trying so ridiculously hard to escape? ”
“No! I kissed you, cos I’m curious, Magnolia. Because I wanted to. But every time I try to play nice and have an actual conversation with you, you argue instead. Arguing makes it really fuckin’ hard to kiss you.”
Play nice. And yet, he claims there’s no game.
Angrily, he looks down at my phone and the call that rings out. Elson gives me just a minute of pause, then he dials again, lighting up my screen and turning Billy’s glare to something much darker.
Much meaner.
“I have to take this.” I press the pads of my fingers to my trembling lips, while hidden deep inside my chest, my heart aches and shudders. Because yeah, I’m curious! I’ve been curious my whole damn life. But grabbing me… tonight… like this?
That wasn’t a kiss of passion. It wasn’t even a kiss of curiosity.
It was nothing more than a feeble attempt to destroy the date I’ve organized, a last-ditch effort to cancel the plans he never wanted to make in the first place.
“Who is Elson?” His glare sizzles and warms the fingers wrapped around my phone. “Another client?”
“Yes. He is.” Sort of. I accept the call and take a step away.
“I’ll be downstairs when you’re ready.” Bringing the phone to my ear, I charge through Billy’s door and past the closed bathroom.
Turning at the top of the staircase, I jog down and wipe the stupid too-tired-to-function tears from my eyes.
“Hi, Elson.” Sniffling, I clear my throat and head into the kitchen. “So sorry. Is everything okay?”
“Hi, Sweetheart.”