Chapter 28
Audrey
Isip the coffee Tyler just surprised me with from Maggie’s coffee shop.
Setting the cup down, I look at the donut from his favorite donut shop.
He’s brought me one almost every morning since I started working with Joe.
He plays it off like it’s no big deal since he said he stops there anyway, but his thoughtfulness warms me in a way I needed more than anything today.
Yesterday, after I left him, I went home and cried for an hour in the shower. One of those cries that just erupts from the depths of every cell, leaving me shaky and feeling slightly hungover. It was incredibly therapeutic.
Except for the fact that the letter wouldn’t leave my mind. Still hasn’t. Even today.
Joe read it. He knew what was happening, knew his daughter was begging for help. And he didn’t care.
As much as I’d like to say I enjoyed being right about him, the victory is bittersweet.
The moment I saw that letter, I realized I actually wanted to be wrong. I wanted him to have never received it, and if I told him now, he’d want to help. He’d do what was right and embrace me like I’d always dreamed when I was a child.
But that isn’t reality.
The reality is exactly what I thought it was. And I’m more devastated than I want to admit, even to myself.
I gave myself last night. I cried. Drank some wine. And then Tyler came over. He spent hours showing me exactly how much he cares about me by worshipping me fully, all the while making what I hope were jokes about knocking me up as many times as I’ll let him.
Or maybe I don’t hope those comments were jokes…
In the corners of my mind, that I generally ignore, the thought of that made me oddly delighted and way more turned on than I should’ve been.
It isn’t that I don’t like kids or don’t want them, but it’s never been a priority. It hasn’t been anything that I’ve given much thought to, one way or another.
Had it happened by accident, I’m sure my mindset would’ve changed. But I was so meticulous about making sure that it never happened that I never took the time to really dig into my feelings about it.
Until now. Until Tyler. And it’s scary as hell. But also…not.
“Audrey!” Joe’s deep voice echoes through the hallway, startling me so hot coffee plops out of the lid and lands on the back of my hand.
I hiss as the hot liquid drips down my skin, bringing my hand to my mouth.
Licking the coffee off, I quickly swipe the back of my hand down the side of my black dress pants.
Before Joe can yell for me again, I hurry down the hallway to where he stands in the doorway to his office, a scowl tracking my approach.
The incensed energy rolling off him in waves is so strong, it may pull me under with him. Forcing my voice to be steady and strong, I inquire, “Can I help you, Mr. Bassham?”
He turns and starts to walk into his office. “Yes, come in here. I need to talk to you.”
My stomach rolls as I follow him inside. I swallow the bile rising in my throat. “Of course.”
He throws his hand at the chair in front of his desk as he passes it, and I take that as a directive to sit down.
I perch on the end, clasping my hands to disguise the tremor and resting them in my lap.
He circles his desk and takes a seat, leaning back in the chair, slightly cocked to the side.
Propping his elbow on the armrest, he covers his mouth with his hand as his stare bores into me.
My lips push up in what I hope is a polite smile. “Is there something specific you need?”
His hand drops from his mouth as his lips thin. He leans forward, placing a forearm on the desk. With narrowed eyes, he asks, “Do you need to make some extra money?”
There are very few things he could’ve asked me that would’ve shocked me more than that.
My tongue darts out to wet my suddenly parched lips.
The fact that this might be a test isn’t lost on me, but I also do, in fact, need extra money.
“I, uh. Who doesn’t need some extra money?
” The laugh I let out sounds as strangled as it feels.
The smile I receive is neither friendly nor amused. “I take that as a yes.” Joe types something on his computer before continuing, “I assumed that was the case when I watched the security footage taken in this very office while I was out yesterday.”
My mouth drops, and I feel dizzy as he turns the computer monitor to face me, and the video starts to play. I’m not even sure why I’m so surprised. I even told myself this was a possibility.
I swallow what feels like a boulder in my throat before croaking, “I can explain.”
What that explanation will be, I’m not entirely sure.
Joe turns the monitor away from me so I don’t have to continue to witness what I fear is my downfall. “I’m assuming the man from the security company didn’t know? I would hate to have to fire them.” His tone tells me he already knows that having Tyler and his guys fired is the last thing I’d want.
“Matt didn’t know,” I rush out, my voice barely a whisper. “I snuck past him.”
Joe nods. “I see.” He leans back in his chair and rests his hands, fingers intertwined, on his slightly rounded stomach. “I was very disappointed when I watched this. I saw a lot of promise in you.”
Despite my nerves, I fight the urge to scoff. What a ridiculous notion that he saw promise in me. As what? His glorified secretary? Instead, I appease him. “Yes, sir. I’m disappointed in myself.”
Sighing, he continues his interrogation. “So what was it? What were you looking for?”
I open and close my mouth a few times, but I have no idea what to say.
Suddenly, Joe pops forward in his chair, and he snarls, “Are you fucking working for someone? Are you spying on me for some piece of shit?”
His abrupt vitriol has me stammering even worse than before when he slams his fist on the desk, causing me to jump with a yelp. “Answer me!” he roars.
That jolts me back and allows me to form a sentence. “No, nothing like that. I swear. It was like you said. I need money, and I was looking for something. Anything. I didn’t even know what I was looking for. I was just hoping for something that would help me.” The words tumble out of me.
Joe runs a hand across his lips as he thinks about what I said, and, I can only guess, he decides what he’s going to do with me.
My heart pounds so hard, it’s hurting my chest. With my lungs feeling so tight and compressed, it’s as if I’ll never be able to take a full breath of air again.
Joe takes so long to respond, I almost lose it and yell at him to call the police or do something.
Just put me out of this misery of waiting.
Though I’m more afraid of being fired than getting the police called on me.
Then finally, he says calmly, “You know what? I believe you.”
I honestly don’t know if I’m relieved about that. Because I still betrayed him, and I don’t know what that means for me.
His menacing smile has my blood running cold. “I have a way for you to make it up to me. And even though I don’t like to reward bad behavior, I’ll compensate you for it.”
That last part confounds me enough that I find my voice again to ask, “Why would you do that?”
The smile morphs into a hardened stare. “Because if I pay you, you’re just as complicit as I am.”
Terror at what he is going to pay me for has the nausea coming back in full force. “What will I need to do?”
“I need you to help with something. Unfortunately, I don’t think I can accomplish it myself. At least not in the timeframe I need to.” He raises his eyebrows, as if daring me to say I won’t do it.
My breath comes in little pants. “Are you going to tell me what that is?”
His face is expressionless when he replies, “When you need to know, I’ll tell you. Until then, do your fucking job.”
It’s clear I’m being dismissed when he looks away from me and starts doing something on his computer, as if I’m not in the room.
I grip the armrests and push to stand, pausing to make sure my legs will hold me.
Forcing breaths in and out of my lungs, I pivot carefully toward the door and take small steps in that direction.
My hand is on the knob when Joe calls for me one last time. “Oh, and Audrey? You fuck this up or you tell anyone, and it won’t end well for your boyfriend out there or his company either.”
I freeze, and Joe smirks.
“I’m old, but I’m not an idiot. I see the way you two look at each other. The touches that happen when you two think no one’s looking. So do what I say. For both of your sakes.”
A curt nod is all I can manage as I open the door and walk into the hall. I hurry to the bathroom to pull myself together before potentially running into Tyler or Matt.
As soon as the bathroom door clicks behind me, I sprint to the toilet and throw up until there’s nothing left in my stomach. I continue to dry heave for a few minutes before my stomach stops contracting, and I sink down to my side, laying my overheated cheek on the cool tile.
This whole time, I thought I had this under control, but I realize how stupid I’ve been. But there’s no turning back now. I’ve gotten this far, and even if I wanted to, I don’t think there’s any way I could walk away. The irony of what just happened isn’t lost on me.
Sitting up, I crawl over to the vanity. I open every drawer hoping to find a washcloth and maybe a toothbrush or at least toothpaste, all while ignoring the irony of rummaging through more of Joe’s drawers.
In the back of the cabinet under the sink, I find a travel-size bottle of mouthwash. I rinse my mouth and put the bottle into one of the drawers, just in case I need it again in the future.
Taking one more steadying breath, I head back to my makeshift desk, preparing myself for whatever may come.