Chapter Two
Corey
I throw my paintbrush down, frustrated that I can’t quite get the color of his eyes right. Just another thing that’s not going my way.
And it’s not like I have anyone to complain to. I’ve always been a bit of a lone wolf. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I have my brother, River, and his girlfriend, Bella. And I have a whole motorcycle club at my back, the Devils and Angels MC, and not many people can say that. But we were born into this life and the club is all that I’ve ever known.
But genuine connections outside of the MC world?
Yeah, I’m lacking in those.
My father died a few years back, and I do have another older half brother out there somewhere, but I don’t have anything to do with Tatum. I also don’t have a close relationship with my mother. I haven’t since my other brother, Matthew, died.
Maybe she wishes it was me who was murdered instead of him. We’ve never had that typical mother-daughter relationship, though, even when I was growing up. She was a different mother to her sons than she was to me. She was always more invested in their lives and what they were doing. She kept a distance with me. I don’t know why.
I dropped out of college a few months ago, putting my business and marketing degree on hold to enjoy a slower lifestyle. I’ve been painting, reading, and writing. It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out that it most likely has to do with my brother’s murder in front of me and my kidnapping a while ago. We were in a bar parking lot when my brother Matthew was beaten to death in front of me. And if that wasn’t traumatizing enough, later that year I was held hostage by Rosalind, my friend’s sister, when I stopped to help her on the side of the road, and used as bait so the MC would come after me. I haven’t told anyone, but I have anxiety about leaving the clubhouse. I do it because I recognize that I cannot become a hermit, but that doesn’t mean I like it.
I’ve also been avoiding asking myself what the hell I intend to do with my life. I don’t know, I just feel a little lost right now. And maybe that’s normal for my age. I’m just about to turn twenty.
Or maybe I’m just a fucking mess.
I think it might be a mix of both.
But I do know that I have the time to figure it out, and I will.
I always do.
Damon, one of the members of the former Angels MC, almost bumps into me at the front door, which I just opened to head outside for some fresh air. He steps aside for me to exit first so he can enter. He has a big box in his hands and dips his head at me, eyes trailing over me as he passes. “Corey.”
“Damon,” I reply, smiling. His usually friendly-looking mouth is flattened into a hard line, and River mentioned some extra pressure put on him by the MC. I’m not exactly sure what it’s about, as no one tells me the ins and outs of the club. I do know that Julianna has closed her office, the one where they ran their real estate empire from, so everyone can just work from home or the clubhouse instead. Damon must be helping move everything out, getting ready for when we all move into the new joint clubhouse together. I step back against the wall and just watch him.
Gray eyes, dark hair, and a smile that could tempt a nun. He’s possibly the most attractive man I’ve ever seen in my life, with a body like a professional fighter, ripped but lean, and the charm you’d warn your daughters about. And those full, perfect lips?
Yeah, I kissed those once.
My first kiss.
And probably my last from him.
I knew falling for a guy like Damon was a bad idea. Between River’s overprotectiveness, my inexperience, and our ten-year age gap, all the cards are against us. Ten years isn’t that much, is it? But in the rare moments we’ve had together, there was something between us. A spark. This time last year, I wouldn’t have been able to be in the same vicinity as Damon, but now he walks into our clubhouse like it’s his own. And I guess it is.
He drops the box off inside and then heads back out to his car. I can’t help but admire his nice ass in his blue jeans, and the swagger in his walk. I put my paintbrush down and head out the front as he gets into his car and drives away. His energy is a little darker than it once was, but hey, I guess motorcycle club life would do that to you.
Since we shared the kiss and River got into a fight with him over it, we’ve kind of kept our distance.
Except for when he came to save my life when I got kidnapped, but that is a whole different story. He put his life on the line for me and then went back to being my fucking friend. Maybe not even that. Maybe after the kiss he just thought I wasn’t worth the drama. I don’t know. But I spend a lot of my time wondering what is going on in his mind. I know that he’s been moving up in the ranks of the MC, and that he is a very ambitious man, so maybe that’s part of the reason I’m not high up on his to-do list. Feels a bit par for the course in my life right now.
“What are you doing?” River asks, making me jump as he approaches from behind.
“You scared me,” I groan, hand on my chest. I push off the wall and turn and look into his narrowed blue eyes, so different from my own hazel. He doesn’t have my red hair either, instead a thick mop of dark locks. I’ve heard many women call him attractive, but not one of them has thought him approachable. The dark, menacing aura he exudes might have something to do with it.
But to me, he’s River. My big brother, and the man I know would do anything to protect me.
“Is everything okay with you?” he asks, crossing his arms over his chest.
I roll my eyes and copy his stance. “Yes, everything is fine. You know, besides having no idea what I’m doing with my life.”
He laughs, and I smile to myself as I notice a blue butterfly fly past us. “Corey, you are twenty. You are financially set. You have all the time in the world to figure out the rest of it.”
When Matthew died, we found out he left all of his money to River and me. Matthew was responsible like that.
River gave it all to me.
So he’s not wrong. But that doesn’t mean I want to sit at home and do nothing with my life. I’ve always been a go-getter and a high achiever, so this whole life-crisis stage is quite new to me. My mother always said to me that my worth is based off my productivity, and while we don’t have the best relationship, I do take that to heart. I think that is what is making this time in my life so hard for me. I just have no idea what I am doing.
“I suppose time is on my side,” I mutter, smiling up at him. “Where’s Bella?”
“She’s on her way now—she said you two are going out for lunch?”
“Yep.” I nod, taking a deep breath. Going to lunch is normal. It will be good to get out of here. “I need some girl time. No offense, but you’re always around.”
River laughs, and I know how much he loves that his fiancée and I are close. We’re a family, and I don’t think he could ever find a better woman for him than Bella. He found his match, and in doing so he also gave me the sister I always wanted. I don’t know what I would do without her and Julianna. Romeo might be my cousin, but Julianna and Bella have filled the role of female friends for me. Something I was always lacking growing up, mostly due to my strained relationship with my mother.
I head back inside and grab my handbag and phone and apply some lip oil. Bella pulls up just as I step back outside.
“Perfect timing,” I say as I open the door of her BMW and slide in. She looks beautiful, as usual, dressed in all black, and with her long dark hair it causes her gray eyes to pop even more. She has a striking beauty that others could only dream of. And even more importantly, she is the kindest soul.
“You know I like to be punctual,” she says with a grin. She puts the car into reverse and starts to speed back down the driveway when River comes running out, so she stops and rolls her window down.
“You weren’t going to even stop and say hello?” he asks, leaning in to kiss her.
I roll my eyes. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
Most women want to bed him but are scared to stay longer than that. Where others cower, Bella stands her ground and isn’t intimated by him. She brings out a softer side of River and it’s made him a better person. I love him either way, but now he has a happiness about him that is contagious. And although I secretly am so happy for them both, I do love to give him shit about how much he has changed. Only when it comes to her, though.
To everyone else, he’s still a sociopath.
River is the one they call when they need something done without questions. His hands might be covered in blood, but his heart is pure gold. He’s protective, loyal, and deadly.
And I love him more than life.
How lucky he is, though, to have found someone who accepts him as he is. Bella loves everything about him. To her, he is perfect, and no one could ever tell her otherwise.
I only wish that I can one day find that in a partner as well.
“River, I’m starving. I skipped breakfast because I knew we were having a big lunch—I’ll see you when we get back,” she replies, amusement in her tone. “Not to mention I saw you this morning.”
They live together. Here, with me, at the clubhouse. Bella just went to run some errands, so she had been away and busy for the morning.
They kiss again, and then he steps away from the car, finally letting us leave.
“Goodbye to you too, brother,” I call out, and he laughs and waves. I catch Bella checking out his ass as she pulls out and wince. “Eyes back on the road.”
“What? I’m hungry,” she teases, and I shake my head at her. “Speaking of snacks, I’ve noticed that Damon has been around the Devils clubhouse a fair bit.”
I had noticed the same thing. It’s hard not to. It’s like I can sense when he’s around, but instead of Spidey sense, it’s my vagina calling out to him. Except I get no response back.
“He’s doing some stuff for Julianna,” I reply, looking out the window. “And since River isn’t trying to kill him anymore, I guess it’s safe for him to be around now.”
Probably because Damon no longer has any interest in me.
And to be honest, I’m done trying to read his mind. He knows where I am.
“I don’t think anyone who dates you will ever be completely safe,” she mutters under her breath.
“Well, then no one is safer than Damon,” I grumble back. He hasn’t made another move on me, and he’s a fucking biker. If they want something, they take it.
And there’s no taking going on here.
None at all, in fact.
I’m still a virgin.
And I’m not ashamed of that. I’ve been waiting for the right man to come along, but apparently he got lost on the way. Bastard must have my terrible sense of direction.
With a topic change about how hungry we are, the mood lightens and soon we arrive at the restaurant. I’ve been craving hot pot all week, and I’m so excited to be here.
“Why have I never been here before?” she asks, glancing around the tables. We take a seat and start ordering our selections on the device they hand us.
“It really is an experience,” I reply with a smile, ordering some beef, vegetables, prawns, and octopus. “Do you want the hot and spicy broth?”
She shakes her head. “No, I think I’ll have the laksa one.”
I order more things than we’ll likely finish, and we end up there for two and a half hours, chatting, laughing, and creating our heavenly hot pots. I realize as we’re heading home that it’s the first time in a while that I am not feeling anxious being outside of the clubhouse. I feel at peace and for once, not on edge.
When we return to the clubhouse, I’m undoing my seat belt when I hear Bella mutter, “Oh fuck.”
“What?” I ask, lifting my head up.
The first thing my eyes land on is Damon standing in the clubhouse parking lot.
But this time, he’s not alone.
No.
There’s a tall, blonde woman with him, a tight pair of jeans hugging her every curve. And she’s laughing and touching his shoulder. I suck in a sharp breath. “Who the fuck is that?” I blurt out before I can stop myself.
“I think that’s the woman who is taking over our office space,” Bella replies, and I can feel her eyes on me. “I didn’t even know they knew each other.”
I grind my teeth together as the woman plays with her hair and stares up at him. She looks nothing like me. She’s a fucking Barbie, and I look like the chick from Brave .
He should have just said that I wasn’t his type at all. Or maybe that’s just my insecurity speaking. I have no reason to be angry, but I am. For some reason this has caught me off guard, maybe because he’s never brought a woman around me before, or even flirted with one in front of me.
I reach for the handle to open the door, pulling on it harder than necessary.
“What are you going to do?” Bella asks, concern in her tone.
“Nothing,” I force out, even though every instinct in my body is telling me otherwise. Deep inside I want to go and grab him, and ask him what the hell he’s doing, and maybe shake some sense into him. “He’s not mine. He can fuck who he wants.”
And I don’t get to have a say in that. He can be with whoever, and I don’t get to have an attitude about it. Or at least that’s what I’m telling myself.
“Corey,” she calls out gently as I get out of the car. She does the same and catches up to me as I walk by them to get inside.
My eyes catch his and hold in the moment I pass them, like we’re in a slow-motion movie.
I don’t know what he sees in mine, but he winces, slightly.
I guess I don’t have the poker face that I thought I did. I’ve never been one to go where I’m not wanted.
And I’m not going to start now.