Chapter Twenty-Eight
Corey
The perks of the MC owning so many properties and businesses is that when you need to hide someone, you have the facilities to do so.
But before Tatum is long gone to an undisclosed location, with River as his number-one captor, I ask if I can have five minutes with him.
That doesn’t go down well, but just like in most situations, I win.
“I’m going in with you,” Damon states, as we stand by the garage door.
“Just stand here,” I tell him, lifting my head to kiss him.
When I step inside, Tatum is sitting on the ground, bound and beaten. I have to admit, I do feel bad for him. At the end of the day, he is blood related to me, even if I don’t know him.
“I thought I could trust you,” he says without looking up. “But you’re just like River, aren’t you?”
“And you’re just like our father,” I return, with no heat in my tone. “You think you’re avenging this great man. Robert was an abusive asshole, and while I don’t know what happened to him, I’m glad he’s dead.”
“I just wanted to prove that River killed him. Don’t you want that? He’s your dad, too.”
I sigh heavily. “What does it matter? He’s gone now. But we’re alive and we need to move on and live our lives. And to be honest, he wasn’t a nice person, Tatum. He didn’t even visit you, or support you, and the kids he did stay around for...well, we thought you got the better deal.”
“He was still our father.”
“Sometimes family is defined by loyalty, not blood. You’re in an MC, you should know that.”
“You’re a traitor, and things aren’t over yet, Corey. I’m not going to let this go.”
And that’s why I probably won’t see him again.
“Tell Dad I said hi,” is all I say before I walk back outside.
I know people say I’m a little like River, but the truth is, I’m not. Yes, I’ll do what I need to protect the people I love, but from what I’ve heard the other men say, River seems to enjoy it. That, or he feels nothing at all. Maybe he can disassociate. Who knows?
But I can’t relate to that. River’s anger runs cold, where mine runs hot. My rage and violence are fueled by passion, and the desperate need to protect those that I love. I couldn’t hurt just anyone.
Damon walks me back into the kitchen and wraps me in his arms. Did he think what I said was cold?
But then he tells me how much he loves me, and how strong I am.
And I know that I’m where I’m meant to be.
“I can’t believe you shot Leif,” Bella says, looking both horrified and on the verge of breaking out into laughter. “You are just full of surprises.”
“Don’t you dare tell me I’m like River, or I’m going to scream,” I state, pushing my sunglasses up on my nose. We’re both sitting outside enjoying our morning coffee together, and debriefing everything that happened yesterday.
She lets the laughter loose. “Is that what everyone is saying? Probably why I get along with both of you so well.”
“I’m going to kill you.”
“You going to shoot me, too?” she asks, trying to keep a straight face. I roll my eyes. “At least he’s going to be fine. He’s going to be walking in no time. At least that’s what the hot doctor told him.”
“Jag came back happier than I’ve ever seen him,” Bella comments, taking a sip from her mug. “Happier than when he’s eating a mango.” She lowers her tone. “Have you seen how he eats one? You just know he’s good at...certain things.”
My eyes widen, because no lie, I had a similar thought when I first watched him consume one. And consume is the right word. “Oh, definitely,” I reply, wiggling my eyebrows. “You just know he’s one of those men who enjoy it. He would devour you.”
Not one drop would be left.
“Well, the good doctor might be in luck, then.”
We both start laughing.
“What are you two whispering about?” Damon asks as he opens the sliding door and steps outside.
Damn, that was close.
“Nothing,” I lie. “Just enjoying the sunshine. We can’t go anywhere until these Lost Lions MC shenanigans are done with, so we are making the best of it. By the way, I can’t wait for the pool at the new clubhouse. With the big garden, it will be beautiful, and I can’t wait to use it.”
“The new clubhouse has everything,” Bella adds, scrolling on her phone. “It even has a playroom. A home theater. A spa. We will never have to leave that house.”
“A playroom for just Julian until everyone else starts having kids,” Damon says, looking over at Bella. “Are you guys next?”
Bella shrugs and plays coy. “Who knows? Maybe in a year or two. I’m not ready just yet.”
“I’d like a few kids in a couple of years,” Damon says, winking at me.
And it suddenly hits me that we’ve never had the conversation.
The one where I tell him I don’t want any children.
At least I think I don’t.
I envision a baby with his gray eyes and dark hair, and yeah, my heart melts a little, but not enough to commit. Of course he’d want children. He didn’t have a good childhood, and I know he’d break generational curses to make sure that the cycle didn’t repeat. He’d be a great father. I see him with Julian.
“What’s wrong?” he asks, stroking my arm. “Corey?”
“I don’t know if I want kids,” I blurt out, turning to face him. “And it just hit me that we’ve never spoken about it. We probably should have.”
“You don’t want kids? Ever?” he asks, sounding surprised. “But you love kids. You are amazing with Julian.”
“It’s not that I don’t like kids—I do. I love kids. I just never pictured myself having any. I thought I’d always just be the fun aunt, I don’t know,” I admit, wringing my hands together nervously.
He takes one of my hands and holds it in his. For safekeeping. “You have nothing but time to decide these things.”
“But what if I don’t change my mind?” I ask, because I feel like that’s where he’s going with this. He thinks I’ll have a change of heart, and that maybe this is just a phase. But I’ve felt like this for a long time.
“We’ll worry about it when we get there,” he replies gently, playing it off.
But this is a big problem, and it could be a deal breaker for one of us. I don’t know if it’s something we should just hope works itself out. I don’t want to fall more and more and get attached and then he says he wants a baby.
Would I have one just to keep him?
Sighing, I figure this is a conversation we need to have when we are alone, and once I have processed my thoughts on it.
“Okay,” I reply, stroking his knuckles with my thumb. “But I think it’s something we both need to get on the same page about.”
How does one compromise in a situation like this?
I don’t think you can. You either want the same thing, or you don’t.
When I turn to ask Bella a question, I realize that she has quietly left and gone back inside. I don’t blame her—I wouldn’t want to be around a couple having this conversation, either.
“I agree,” he replies, bringing my hand to his lips and placing a kiss there. “And we will. But it’s not something we have to commit to right now, we have the time to figure it out. Together.”
He’s so sweet.
Maybe I could just have one child...
No, I wouldn’t do that for anyone. I’d have to be a hundred percent sure, or it’s just not fair to everyone else.
I feel unsettled after this conversation, because this isn’t just something small.
This is huge.
This is a deal breaker for most, if not now, then perhaps somewhere down the line.
I have a lot to think about, but all I do know is that I don’t want any other man.
I want him, and I have for the longest time. This is the man I couldn’t escape, the one who, for whatever reason, kept calling out to me. No matter what was going on in my life, or how angry or annoyed I was at Damon, underneath it all, it was always him.
And now, I don’t know what to do.