Chapter 49
Noah
“Noah, the festival is about to start. Grace told me to talk to you. The museum grounds are crawling with food trucks.”
His stomach fell. “It’s a temporary lease. We cleared it with one of your board members this morning.”
“Did you think to call me?” Aya demanded.
“I did. But I didn’t want you to say no.”
Aya’s voice was stony. “Let me guess. Mrs. Irving thought it would be a great idea for our entire event to smell like cheap tacos.”
“She’s a r-reasonable person, Aya! If you talk to her. She had been calling me nonstop.”
“Okay.” Aya’s voice had dropped in volume and was steady—scarily steady. “So, I take it you were going to tell me sometime? Because this is a pretty big lie of omission.”
He felt compelled to defend himself. “I tried to say something earlier,” he hissed. “Then I forgot, and I had to rush out. What was I supposed to do?”
“I mean, you could have knocked on my door! You never said you had work stuff you wanted to talk about!”
“Oh, okay,” he said, thinking furiously. “So I can talk to you whenever as long as it’s about work stuff? Because when I text about anything else, you don’t get back to me.”
“I thought I was your plus-one for this event!” she cried. “And you’ve been ignoring me all night!”
“People asked me to play guitar,” he said, shocked that she would have a problem with it.
“It’s the only thing I can do for Nobu and Justin that’s special, okay?
They both prefer Nami to me, and Mom and Dad are already annoyed because I’ve missed so many family things.
Just for once, I wanted to have this experience. With my family.”
“Then why did you even ask me? I didn’t need to be here.”
“Justin told me to,” he said. It wasn’t exactly a lie, although it certainly wasn’t the whole truth. He had asked her because he wanted to spend time with her. And because, secretly, he did consider her a part of his family.
But he wasn’t about to say that.
“Ooh, Justin,” Aya said. “So he’s important enough to get me invited, but I don’t qualify on my own merits?”
The academic language threw him. “I’m sorry. What?”
“No. Noah, I should have known. The tabloids were right all along.”
“They’re never right.” he said.
“They got the story right,” she said quietly. “Your story. Sure, some of those women, that was just for show. I get that now. But the gist of what they were saying, that you just use women, that you’re too passionate about your musical reputation to commit to anything? That part was true.”
“You have no idea how lonely it is,” he shot back.
She shook her head, and her voice quavered when she answered. “Ordinary people are lonely too, Noah. And sad and frustrated and suffering. You don’t get a monopoly on that just by living in a shallow, dysfunctional fishbowl.”
They were interrupted by Nobu. He came out with two large glasses of wine, and it finally hit Noah that they could probably be heard from the kitchen.
“Hi, lovebirds,” he said. “I may not be a married man quite yet, but I can tell you a good toast fixes a lot. Noah, maybe take whatever you were going to use for the wedding and get it all out now, huh?”
Aya glared. “You shouldn’t be defending him. Your family needed him, and he’s never around.”
Nobu shrugged. “We’re getting by, Aya. We always thought Noah would end up back here eventually, and here he is, eh?”
Aya took the glass from Nobu, but she didn’t drink.
Noah refused to take a glass. “Dude, in case you haven’t noticed, you don’t live here either.”
“Yes, but he’s been here,” Aya shot back. “Do you have any idea how hard things have been for Nami? Everyone in your family was rallying around her. Hell, my own mom took food over every week.”
Noah didn’t say anything. Hana had a funny little book collection full of babyish biographies of famous feminists and board books about impressionist paintings.
His mother had said they came “from the Hanson home,” which seemed to mean they were gifts from Aya.
She hadn’t taken credit for it, though. Did she pick out all those beautiful books because Nami was suffering?
“She has a lot of help,” said Noah weakly.
Aya sucked in a breath.
“So postpartum depression is fine as long as you have help. That’s good to know.”
Nobu shook his head, taking a large swig from the wineglass. “Fuck, this is good. Aya, don’t listen to him. He’s not in the loop. Mom and Dad thought we had to shield him from the worst of it, as things have been so rough with his record company this past year.”
“Things have… Where are you getting that from?” Noah asked.
Nobu gave him a tight-lipped smile. “Oh, my dear boy. I read the papers, too, you know.”
Aya stood like a statue in her peach dress. She looked beautiful with the wineglass in her hand, the gentle light of the late-day sun splashing across her features. But she looked miserable too.
“I’m sorry, Noah,” she said. “I can’t give up everything in my life just to be your temporary side piece.”
“That’s n-not what I’m asking,” Noah said.
“What are you asking again?” asked Nobu, seeming confused.
“Nothing! I’m not asking for anything, dammit.”
Aya nodded. She took a sip of her wine before handing it back to Nobu. “It’s good, but I have to drive myself back home.”
A long silence followed as she walked down to her car. As she drove away, Nobu looked over at Noah.
“You want to walk to the creek or something? I don’t have the shoes for it, but I’ll indulge you if you shine these for me afterward.”
Noah gave a tremulous laugh. “Don’t you need to get back in there?”
Nobu shrugged. “I got out the better shiraz. Have you tried it? It’s really very good. I’d say I’ve done my part for the moment.”
Shoving a glass at his brother, he started up the path. And Noah decided to follow.