Chapter 41 Nora
Nora
Ilet Theo open my car door for me. I’m so busy staring at him that he has to lean over and unsnap my seatbelt.
He grins at Saoirse and thanks her before taking my hand and tugging me out of the car.
He slams the door shut, and then he’s pulling me into his arms so tightly that all I can do is clutch at his back and enjoy the feeling of the oxygen being squeezed out of my lungs.
I’m vaguely aware of Saoirse pulling out of the driveway.
‘What the hell is going on?’ I ask, my hands dragging shamelessly over back muscles that should be illegal.
‘Belle.’ His voice is hoarse enough, desperate enough, to cause me to pull away and look up, and then by silent, and very mutual, agreement, his mouth is on mine.
And thank God. From the way his warm, hard lips press against mine and his hand clenches in my hair and his tongue drives into my mouth, focused and hungry, I’d guess he’s as frantic for me as I’ve been for him, these past few days.
He’s ignoring my question, and for once I let it slide, because being here with Theo as he kisses the life out of me like a dying man is, in a funny way, all the answer I need.
This is real.
It’s real, and we can work with this. We can find a way.
The softness of his lips and the potency of his tongue are having a drugging effect on me, commandeering my senses and my brain function so thoroughly that I stand like a rag doll in his arms, allowing him to hold me up as I use my exhausted reserves on important functions like sucking on Theo’s irresistible bottom lip and entangling my tongue with his and sliding his silky hair through my fingers.
He smells delicious. Like sun cream and summer and lemons. I drag my lips away from his mouth, along his jaw and down his neck, tugging the open collar of his shirt down so I can inhale the scent of his skin.
‘Happy to see me?’ he groans, and I hum an affirmative against his neck.
‘Theo?’
‘Yeah, baby?’
‘What have you done?’ I ask casually between laps of his neck, and he laughs sweetly, threading his fingers through the hair at my temple so he can tug my head back slightly while his other hand splays across my lower back.
And there he is.
There’s the man I love, his dark eyes almost all pupil as he gazes down at me, the mouth I’ve been kissing swollen and curved up into a smile bracketed by the softest lines.
‘I fucked up, Belle, and I’m trying to make things right.’
‘You didn’t fuck up. I’m the one who fucked up. I didn’t—I didn’t realise—’
I didn’t realise how lucky I was. How obscenely, outrageously fortunate I was to find you. I was too fucking obtuse and wrapped up in my godforsaken plans to notice.
‘Shh.’ He silences me with a chaste press of his lips against mine. ‘You don’t get to say anything just yet. I need to explain.’
I raise my eyebrows at him before my eyes dart to the indecent house beside us. ‘Maybe start with why we’re here?’
‘Patience, my little pocket rocket. All will be revealed.’ He sighs.
‘Listen, Belle. First up, if you get a call from Holmes, I need you to know, I made a colossal mistake. I told him he should give it another go with you, try to give you what you want. But I’ve changed my mind.
I want to fight for you. I’m sorry, baby, but there’s no way that twat gets to be the guy to make you happy.
I know I can do it, and I’m going to prove it to you.
So if he calls, tell him where to go. Okay? ’
I let him get it all out, because I’m unfairly gratified by his words, but I need to put the poor guy out of his misery.
‘He came over.’
I release a hand from his hair and lay it on his chest, enjoying the way his eyebrows shoot up and his jaw clenches.
‘That fucker.’
‘Romeo. Relax. You’ll be glad to know neither Jonathan nor I have any feelings for each other. At all. Not sure who was most relieved.’ I reconsider. ’On second thoughts, it was definitely him. He actually said thank God when I told him I didn’t love him anymore.’
Theo blinks. ‘Seriously?’
‘Seriously. I’m not sure I’ve ever been so horrified as when I thought he was going to ask me to give us another shot, but he actually came to plead your case. It seems you made quite the impression on him.’
‘Fuck. He told you I cried, didn’t he?’
I grin, but it’s a tender grin. Loving. ‘He did, and it gave me hope that I might still be in with a chance.’
‘So much more than a chance,’ he mutters, and kisses me again. I return his kiss dreamily, my eyelids fluttering closed.
‘I should never have rolled over, Belle,’ he says when he releases my mouth.
‘I definitely shouldn’t have rolled over for him.
I mean, Jesus Christ. Because’—he strokes his thumb down my face, my neck, those eyes boring into mine—‘I love you so much, baby, and I need to be the one that gets to make you happy. No one else, okay?’
The utter relief of hearing those words from him makes me want to sag. Thank God. Thank God. Evelyn was right. If he loves me, surely it can all be okay? We can work everything else out?
‘Iloveyoutoo.’ I stumble over the words in my hurry to get them out.
I need this man to know. Can’t leave him in uncertainty a second longer.
‘And I’m so sorry I let you think anything else.
I’ve been so stupid—I’ve been kicking myself.
But if it’s okay with you, I’d like to go to New York with you, and—’
He closes his eyes as if he’s in pain, before opening them. The light of love and tenderness shining in them is a miracle.
‘Nooo, Belle,’ he croons, shaking his head. ‘Not going to happen. New York’s not happening at all, in fact. Not for us, anyway.’
‘What the hell?’ I stare at him in utter confusion.
‘I’ve been a busy guy these past few days.’
He slides his hands up to my shoulders.
‘That’s why I’ve been staying away from you. I’ve been trying to sort everything out.’
Gently, he holds my shoulders and turns me around, pulling me in against him.
‘Starting with this.’
I sag into him and gawp at the vision in front of us.
He leans and whispers in my ear.
‘One Georgian rectory for the woman of my dreams.’
My entire body goes rigid. I jerk my head around so I can see his face, because I don’t understand.
‘What do you mean?’
He stares down at me, his expression serious once more.
‘I don’t want you choosing me over your dreams. No way, Belle.
If I’m lucky enough to get you, I’ll sure as fuck make certain you get everything else, too.
I came here today expecting to have to fight for you, give you the hard sell on why I can give you the safety and security I know you need.
Thought it might sweeten the deal if I threw your dream home into the package. ’
He shoots me a little smile, as if I’m supposed to find his attempt at a joke funny, but it’s heartbreaking. Horrifying that he thought he had to sell me on the prospect of him as my future.
‘Theo. I don’t need a house, for God’s sake. I just need you. Jesus—I don’t want anything else but you, you idiot.’ I lower my voice. ‘You’re the sweetest, sweetest deal there is already. Don’t try to bribe me.’
I try to swivel in his arms, but he holds me tightly in place against him and brushes his lips against my temple. I feel the warmth of his exhalation on my skin.
‘Well, that’s a huge relief, but I told you, Belle. I want you to have everything you dreamed of. Besides, I’ve fallen for this place too. And I put an offer in last week. It’s ours.’
Enormous crocodile tears spring from my eyes like I’m a cartoon character. I can’t help it. This man is killing me with his surprises and declarations and tenderness. I’m totally overwhelmed. It’s all way too much to take in.
I love you.
Boom.
I bought you your dream home.
Boom.
‘No,’ I say weakly, clutching at the wrist that’s wound around my front.
‘Yep. It was a bit hasty, I know, but I was hoping you wouldn’t turn me down.
I saw it in the local paper last week when I was at the farm and called up the agent straight away.
She’s over there, in her car, giving us space.
I knew it was right for us, Belle, as soon as I saw the photo.
I had fucking goosebumps when I turned the page. ’
‘But you don’t want to live in the countryside,’ I manage.
‘I’ll live anywhere with you.’ His lips go to my ear again. ‘Besides, I’ve fallen hard for it. It has a couple of features the flat just doesn’t offer.’
‘An AGA?’ I say hopefully, and he shakes with laughter against me.
‘It has an AGA. I made sure of that. But I was thinking more of naked swimming.’ His lips brush my earlobe. ‘And naked tennis. Two things I didn’t realise I needed in my life till I saw the grounds.’
I gasp sharply, as much at the visual Theo’s painting as at the sheer scope of this house and its grounds.
My eyes take in the burnished beauty of the house’s facade in the afternoon sun.
Perfect mounds of hydrangea bushes sit below the line of tall, low-silled windows.
In front of each pillar stands an impeccable potted bay tree.
Lawns slope off to one side, a wrought-iron gate tucked tantalisingly into an ancient wall.
‘It sounds like Disneyland,’ I marvel.
‘Naked Disneyland. Just for us,’ Theo drawls, and I laugh. It makes me feel much better that Theo has his own motivations for wanting this place, no matter how dirty they are.
‘Wanna see inside?’ he asks.
‘Hell, yes,’ I say, and he chuckles.
‘What about New York, though?’ His change of plan is bothering me immensely.