Epilogue
Dickens
The day Isaac walked back into my life was the day I proposed to Fritz.
I should explain. Fritz and I’d been dating almost six months. We spent every night at my place and we’d even—slowly—talked about getting a house together. And a dog. For sure a dog. But we’d either wait until Ari passed or—since the cat appeared to be going strong—we’d find a dog who loved cats.
Ari’d met many pooches who came into the store over the years and she never fussed. She looked at them, they looked at her, and everyone went on with their lives.
I wondered how she’d handle a full-time canine companion. Knowing my little one? Probably with aplomb.
Anyway, it’d been on my mind to propose to Fritz, and then Isaac walked through the door of my shop. I was stunned speechless. He was just as beautiful as I remembered.
Dark skin, soulful brown eyes, and a shy smile.
But where my heart used to speed up, it maintained a normal rhythm. Where I used to feel bone-deep attraction, I felt only warm comfort. He’d been a friend as well as a lover and, in that moment, I hoped we could be friendly again. He’d broken my heart, but it’d been first love. Now, with the benefit of hindsight, I saw what I had with Fritz went so much deeper. True love. Forever companionship. ‘Til-death-do-us-part shit.
“Hello, Dickens.”
His voice was even deeper than I remembered. I stepped out from behind the counter and offered my hand.
He grabbed it and pulled me in for a hug.
It felt good. Like releasing tension I’d carried for half-a-dozen years.
After a bit, he pulled back and ducked his head.
“I’m happy to see you.”
I gave him my most genuine smile.
“Are you?”
“Yes.”
I offered the word enthusiastically.
He scratched his bald head. “Well, that’s good because, well, I’ve taken the job as harbor master here in Mission City.”
Stunned speechless. He came from landlocked Whitehorse. But now he wanted to be near the water?
“I can see I’ve surprised you.”
He grinned ruefully. “I’ve spent the past three years working the lighthouse in Tofino. That was great, but too far from the city. I figure being in Mission City will give me the small-town feeling, but I can head to Vancouver whenever the feeling hits me.”
“And Davie Street?”
The local hangout for gay men.
His eyes widened. “Well, sure, if Ben is up for it.”
“Ben?”
“Ben Whitaker.”
I wracked my brains. I’d heard the name. Nice guy. Several years younger than me. Elementary school teacher? French Immersion, if memory served. Hadn’t realized he was gay, but that wasn’t a huge surprise.
“So you’re moving to Mission City because of Ben?”
His grin was rueful. “I agreed to take the position and then met Ben. Things all came together. Now, I wasn’t sure he wanted a relationship after our weekend fling but…”
Despite his dark skin, a blush emerged.
“Well, this is great news. I’d love to introduce you to my…”
I floundered. Fritz and I had never named our relationship. We hadn’t needed to. We were together. Practically lived together. Worked side by side literally. Hell, I’d even learned to live with the motorcycle engine noise. “…partner?”
“Dickens, that sounded like a question.”
His eyes twinkled in amusement.
In that moment, everything became clear. “I’m going to ask him to marry me. And I don’t know if he’ll say yes, but…”
I flapped my hand. So unlike me.
“I’m sure he’ll say yes. Or he will if he has any sense.”
A wistful expression passed over Isaac’s face. “If we’d stayed together, then I never would’ve met Ben.”
“And I wouldn’t have met Fritz. You see, it was all meant to be.”
“Yeah.”
He scratched his head again. “So we’re good?”
“We’re more than good.”
I offered an impish smile. “We’re friends.”
A matching grin. “I like that. I can use more friends in this town.”
He gave a little wave and headed back outside into the nippy air.
Christmas was just around the corner.
Sunshine breezed into the room, her green corduroy jumper with Santa’s grinning face matching a swishy skirt of the same fabric. She stopped, gave me one long level look and asked, “Did you buy him a ring?”
“Uh…”
“And you have to be creative.”
“Dare I ask?”
“Oh, you’ll figure it out.”
She made a shooing motion. “Now, go find something nice. Something strong that he can wear at work.”
“I don’t mind if he takes it off while he works.”
Honestly, Fritz didn’t need a ring. Neither did I. This commitment we had transcended symbols.
“Yeah, whatever, make it a good one. Oh, I know a jeweler in Vancouver. You’ll love her.”
I eyed the threatening storm clouds.
The meteorologists predicted first snow of the year.
“You’ll be fine.”
She placed her hand on her hip. “Now, go.”
So I did. Made the round trip to Vancouver in just under three hours. The snow started about halfway home, and by the time I pulled into Mission City, I was sweating under the strain of driving in the snow. One of my least favorite things to do. I drove past my store to find it shuttered for the night. Oh, good, Sun had left early.
The light in Spike’s shop was still on, but he’d be closing up soon.
I parked around back and sprinted up to my apartment. I hopped into the shower to wash off the gross stress sweat and then lay down on the bed. I positioned the ring perfectly and snapped a picture, then sent it to Fritz’s phone.
Forty-two seconds later, his heavy footfalls clomped up the stairs. He burst through the door and slammed it shut. Two thuds as he so considerately removed his boots. Within moments, he was at the threshold to my bedroom.
He held up his phone.
I grinned.
He sputtered. “You sent me a dick pic.”
“Well, given my name is Dickens, I would say it’s about time.”
Slowly, he crept into the room, peering over to hone in on my crotch.
My erection lay heavy against my belly and a drop of precum leaked onto the ring which lay just below my navel.
“You sent me a dick pic.”
His voice carried a note of wonder.
“I’m also proposing. Keep your eye on the prize. Or should I say the ring?”
Our gazes met. I read the uncertainty, and it hurt my heart. Because it wasn’t uncertainty about me, but uncertainty about himself. Over and over, during the last six months, I’d tried to convince him I didn’t care about what he couldn’t do.
He’d gone so far as to hire a tutor to help him improve his reading.
I knew how hard he tried. I couldn’t convince him I didn’t need him in any way other than the way he was. He was perfect. He was my perfect.
Slowly, he advanced into the room. He eased onto the bed and sat so our hips touched. With exquisite gentleness, he ran his hand from my knee, up my thigh, and across my hipbone to my navel. Reverently, he touched the ring.
“Try it on.”
He did.
To my infinite relief, it fit.
He held up his hand, and the light glinted off the platinum. “Did you get one for yourself?”
I’d spent the entire trip into town debating and the entire trip home waffling between certainty and regret. Finally, I relented. “Top drawer of my nightstand.”
He leaned over to open it and pulled out the box. He flipped it open and grasped the ring. Matching in every way. “I should’ve done this.”
“Impulse buy.”
His expression darkened.
Crap.
“Not buying your ring.”
I snagged his hand. “That was a no-brainer. I wasn’t sure whether to buy one for myself, but I want everyone to know we’re together—”
“I don’t think there’s a resident in Mission City who doesn’t know.”
“Still…”
I squeezed his hand. “If it’s too soon, we can tuck them away.”
His fist closed around the ring. “No way. Your parents are coming for Christmas. Can we marry then?”
I sputtered. “Like, in two weeks?”
“Yes.”
Absolute certainty.
My parents had visited several times since June, and they loved Fritz. My mother loved to feed him, and my father liked to pretend he was interested in getting a motorcycle. At least I hoped he was feigning interest. My mother’d kill him if he actually bought one.
“Sure, Fritz, if that’s what you want.”
“I do.”
Insane for me, though. His business was virtually dead, while I was in the middle of the craziest time of the year. But, for him, I’d do anything. “Okay, let me make some calls.”
His grin went from ear to ear. Slowly, he slid the ring onto my finger. Of course it fit perfectly. “I love you. I know I say it all the time, but I need to say it again.”
“And I echo the sentiment all the time, but sometimes I’m not sure you believe me.”
I pushed myself up so I could take his cheeks in my hands. “I love you, Fritz. I always have, and I always will.”
“Even with my terrible taste in music and my love of loud engines?”
I grinned in return. “I heard you playing Living on a Prayer yesterday.”
He shrugged. “Great song.”
My hands went to his jean shirt, and I started to unbutton it.
He hadn’t been working in the shop today, so there wasn’t any grease on his hands.
Not that I ever cared. He was what mattered.
Later, as we lay tangled in each other’s arms, he snuggled against my neck. “So we’re agreed on a house?”
“We are.”
“And we’re agreed about a dog?”
“If Ari is amenable.”
At the moment, my cat was curled up on her favorite chair in the living room. We spent our time here, as opposed to Fritz’s place, so my little girl was never alone.
“What about kids?”
His voice was tentative.
We probably should’ve had this conversation before getting engaged.
“I love Darlene’s kids, but they don’t make me want to have some of my own.”
I pulled back to gaze at him. “I know it will disappoint my parents, but I don’t think having kids to give them grandchildren is a good plan.”
“Oh, thank God.”
He wiped the sweat from his brow.
“You’re okay with not having kids?”
I suspected I now knew the answer, but I needed confirmation.
“Kids are so much work. And I love other people’s kids, but I don’t want to take on that responsibility. I want to keep volunteering, but that’s enough.”
He helped at a charity that fixed up donated bikes and gave them to kids whose parents couldn’t afford them. A brilliant use of his talents.
“Then we’re good.”
I placed a kiss to his forehead. “This is a forever thing. You get that, right?”
“I do.”
And two weeks later, before my parents, our friends, and matchmaker Sunshine, we repeated that vow to each other.