Chapter 5 I’m Not the Silver Lining Type, but if I Was…
I’m Not the Silver Lining Type, but if I Was…
What time was it? My crappy apartment was almost always dark. And didn’t I deserve a late start after the semester and grading finals? Oh, and almost getting murdered, but demons still felt unreal, unlike grading which was all too familiar.
But demons. We should probably get up and… knife them? I honestly couldn’t imagine what I could contribute to the demon-fighting process.
Siya shifted next to me. I was a bit surprised he was still in bed with me, but I supposed he’d had an even more tiring day than I had. Or maybe he was waiting for me to wake up. He’d insisted on sleeping between me and the door.
That had made me feel safer.
“Good morning,” he murmured.
“Morning,” I echoed. “I guess we should get up now?”
“If you wish.” He raised his head and studied me. A faint smile, but his eyes were serious, and there was a vertical line between his brows.
But he wasn’t jumping out of bed the way I’d expect if he regretted last night. I ran a thumb over the crease in his forehead. “What are you thinking?”
He turned his head and kissed the side of my hand. “I was thinking… I’m not sure what I’m supposed to do now. It’s illegal in Iran, you know. Men lying with men. So I’ve always had to be… secretive. I’ve never stayed the night.”
I felt a surge of… something. Feelings, probably; I wasn’t good at identifying those. Thanks, Mom and Dad! I wished I were better. A better partner. A better human.
“You seem good at spending the night,” I offered, cringing at my own awkwardness. I was relieved when he smiled. “I, um, don’t have a lot of experience with overnight company, either. I mean, it has happened, but… generally not more than once.”
Generally, mornings happened when he or I was too drunk to get up and leave and resulted in awkwardly avoiding each other’s eyes and never speaking again. I didn’t want it to be like that with Siya, even if he wasn’t sticking around.
“You can shower first, if you want,” I offered. This was generosity on my part; the water would be lukewarm for the first shower and cold after that. Unfortunately, the stall was so small I hit my elbows while shampooing my hair; no way were we both fitting in it.
The thought of Siya with soapsuds running down his body made my cock perk up and tap his thigh, like a dog asking to be taken for a walk. Or rather, a run, given the way Siya fucked.
Siya made a small, needy sound in his throat, and his hand tightened on my hip. “Yes. I should get up and shower and hunt demons.” His tone was almost… pleading.
I nodded, my fingers inching around his arm like clinging ivy. “Right. Of course.”
He pushed himself up on one forearm, shifting his weight so that his thick cock pressed against my hip.
He bent his head and kissed my temple, then stayed like that for a moment, breath tickling my hair.
Then he got up and went to shower.
I lay in bed, wishing he were still there and feeling like a crap human being because obviously stopping murderous demons was more urgent than fucking me, and I shouldn’t be sulking about it.
I dragged myself out of bed and to the kitchen and put the kettle on. Before the water got too hot, I dribbled some on a paper towel and used it to clean myself up.
Then I got dressed. A teal tee, a dark green sweater, jeans that hadn’t been subjected to archaeology.
In short, a nicer outfit than I normally wore on days off.
I’d be lying if I pretended it was for any reason other than looking good for Siya.
I hadn’t tried to look cute for a specific man since Dane Arturi had turned to me with a scowl and snapped, “I’m not your boyfriend, Reas, what the hell? ”
The water was boiling, so I made tea and instant noodles.
Siya came out of the bathroom in a threadbare towel, crossed to where he’d left his bag, and dropped the towel on the floor.
I stared at his taut ass, kettle forgotten in my hand, as he bent over his luggage. He had the outstretched wings of the Faravahar tattooed across the small of his back. I hadn’t noticed last night; I’d been preoccupied with his front.
He pulled on a tight black tank top and disappointingly loose black pants.
Turning, he caught me ogling and grinned.
I had to give my head a violent shake to restart my thought process.
“I'm afraid breakfast is Lipton tea and half a packet of Top Ramen,” I told him, wishing I had something sexier to offer. Like chocolate syrup.
“I’ll buy groceries later,” Siya said, as if we were temporary roommates. Without discussion, it seemed to have been agreed that he was staying until the… demon issue… was resolved.
“What’s the next step?” I asked. “Demons, I mean, not food.”
“Normally, I would drive or walk until I felt the illness of their presence.” Siya hesitated.
I wasn’t great at reading between the lines. “But?”
“I don’t want to endanger you. And it isn’t safe for you to be alone here. Bryant already came after you once.”
I shivered. “But now he knows you’re here. Wouldn’t he avoid you? You’re the dews’ apex predator, right?”
“Yes, but they aren’t prey animals. And they can be unpredictable. Bryant and whatever was in Durgan have already behaved in ways I wouldn’t have expected. Do you have the addresses of your archaeologist colleagues?”
“Some of them, yes. I’m not sure how many stay here over the vacation. Doctor Baroja is leaving this afternoon—I promised to feed her cat.”
“Is she a close friend?”
I knew why he was asking—in case she was one of dew now—and winced. “I don’t know her that well. She only came at the start of the year and is on a two-year contract. I just happen to live near her, so it wasn’t inconvenient. And her cat likes me.”
Cancha (named for Coricancha, the site in Peru where Dr. Baroja had done her dissertation work) had been fascinated by my willingness to sit on the floor, moving her little toys for her entertainment.
After fifteen minutes of observation, she had swatted one of the mice gently, then gone to take a nap.
“We should visit before she leaves, to be sure the dew haven’t gotten to her.”
“Okay,” I agreed dubiously, wondering how I would explain Siya’s presence. “I don’t think she’d open the door if Blake or Durgan showed up unexpectedly at night. And she has a gun.”
A simple, if inconvenient, approach occurred to me, and I texted Dr. Baroja asking if she needed a lift to the airport.
Positive: Dr. Baroja was not a demon! We had worked out a simple code where Siya squeezing my hand meant “safe,” and Siya shoving me behind him and stabbing a person meant “demon.” Her being safe meant that I had to awkwardly introduce “My… um… Siyavash is visiting for the holidays” to Dr. Baroja (“Call me Cielo”), who clearly thought Siya was my boyfriend.
“Feel free to stay in my apartment if you want more space,” she said. “It would be nice for Cancha to have company.”
Negative: since Cielo wasn’t a demon, I had to drive her to LAX.
Siya didn’t accompany us—he had a list of my colleagues’ addresses and was investigating—so I was trapped in a car with a faculty member. But she wasn’t my professor, and we didn’t know much about each other’s specializations, so we passed the time telling each other about our research.
If I hadn’t been dealing with crazed drivers and distracted by wondering if Siya was all right, or if he’d killed any more of my acquaintances, it would have been almost pleasant.
As it was, the round trip was still a restful period of normalcy.
We arranged to meet at my apartment for late lunch or early dinner. Siya had my spare key and was there before me (he had insisted on going first) with Chinese take-out.
And okay, it was just take-out, but no one else I’d slept with had bought me dinner, and no one ever said “Welcome home” and smiled when I came in.
My eyes prickled embarrassingly, and I had to clear my throat before I said “Hi.”
I know, I was setting the bar pretty low. On the other hand, he was wearing a tank top and holding out a carton of spring rolls.
“I haven’t made any positive progress,” he said over spicy tofu, drunken noodles, and bok choy with oyster mushrooms. “But I did cross off Ibarruri—large family gathering, no dew—and Blunt is at a job interview in another state. The people next door were keeping her dogs.”
“Sly! I bet I know where she’s interviewing in secret. Er, not that you care. Unless that murder was demons as well.” I shook my head. That would be too much of a coincidence. “What about Ibarruri and guests? The dew can come any time in the darkness, if I understood correctly.”
“Yes.” Siya looked at me out of the corner of his eyes. “I installed a hidden camera to watch the house. Also one in your apartment.”
“...okay?”
“Your friend said we could stay in her home. Are you very attached to this place?”
“It’s mine.” That was always my first thought when people asked why I didn’t move somewhere nicer.
I had rented the first place I could afford on my own, and it was the first place that had been mine, with things I picked, and I didn’t want to give it up, even though emotional attachment to physical possessions was irrational, and most of my stuff was junk anyway, and I knew that and—
“All right,” Siya said.
I blinked up at him. “Really?”
“Of course. We are not fleeing from those damned creatures. We make strategic decisions. If it is important to you to stay here—”
“No.”
He blinked at me, and I cleared my throat self-consciously.
“This apartment isn’t that important. Not compared to your safety. We can stay at Cielo’s.”
“The safest option for you would be to go out of town until I’ve—”
“And leave you alone?” Then I felt stupid because it wasn’t as if I was helping him fight demons. In fact, I was a liability. He’d probably rather I—
His mouth came down on mine, hot and urgent and spicy.
He stopped ravishing my mouth to ask, “Can I fuck you right now?”
“Yes.” My voice squeaked embarrassingly. “Please.”
I squeaked again as he scooped me up into his arms and carried me to the bedroom.