28. Cherry
My beautiful little home, which once felt perfectly proportioned, feels small as I close and lock the door behind Jake and I. Sudden nerves flutter over my skin as I walk into the living room, and dump my purse on the small credenza that splits the living area from the dining table.
“Can I get you a drink?” My hands feel lost like they don’t know where they should be as I rub wet palms against my dress.
“Blossom, come here.”
My feet are moving before I can stop them and I find myself in front of Jake who’s standing in front of the couch. His hands reach for me, his palms on my ass as he pulls me close. I can feel the hardness of his cock against me and a frisson of desire sparks along my spine, making me wriggle.
A sharp slap has me stilling.
“Behave, or I’ll forget every good intention in my head and fuck you right here.”
My hips shimmy and I give him a coy look meant to entice, but all I get is a bewildered frown, followed by a soft look that makes me want to weep .
“What are you afraid of? You wanted this, you deserve these answers but now you’re trying to distract me from telling you.”
He’s right. I’ve wanted these answers for so long. Conjured up different scenarios in my head where he begs for my forgiveness, but now it’s happening, I’m afraid that maybe there is some truth in what Lorelei said. Perhaps he was looking for a way out.
“Nothing. Just… the unknown, I guess.”
Things with Jake and I feel so tentative right now, like the slightest wrong move and this house of cards we’ve built will tumble to the ground.
Jake falls backward on the couch, taking me with him, so I’m sprawled out across his lap, his arms cradling me close. I go to push off him and he tightens his hold.
“Stay.”
I see the vulnerability on his face, as he makes that one request, and realize that I’m not the only one afraid of what might happen when the truth is finally out in the open. I nod and settle against him.
“Tell me why?”
“I was being blackmailed.”
Shock prickles my skin, a sudden feeling of cold, heaviness expanding from my belly, as I try to pull away from his hold only to have him tighten his arms around me. I glare at him as I try to shove away and he closes his eyes and drops his head.
“Please, Blossom, I need to say this and I need you close when I do or I won’t get it all out, and I need to.”
“Fine, but only because I need answers.”
“Thank you.”
I’m caught between my natural reaction to fly off the handle and my need to soothe this man who has always managed to get the soft side of me to come out so easily.
“Who blackmailed you, Jake?”
Jake’s fingers tap out a distracted dance on my leg, the muscles in his neck corded so tight he looks like the slightest movement will cause him to snap. “An old acquaintance. ”
He looks like he’s been thrown back in time, but these one-word answers are fraying my nerves.
“Who? Stop making me work for this, Jake. You owe me this and if you can’t give it to me you need to get out and leave me the hell alone.”
Jake gives a curt nod. “A man named Nick Kendrick. He and I got into some trouble when we were younger and I almost went to jail. He threatened to tell you everything if I didn’t steal the paper.”
“No.” My voice is barely a whisper as nausea swirls in my belly. Something stirs in my brain at the name, but I can’t quite place it.
Jake grips me tighter, his hand smoothing slow circles over the skin of my thigh.
“I said no, I would never have done that and risk you, Blossom. You were my whole world, you still are, but he set you up anyway. When I tried to intervene, he threatened to tell you about my past.”
My hand flutters to my throat as a heavy sense of dread sinks to the pit of my stomach. I know he never killed anyone or hurt someone because he already told me that and, despite everything, I believed him and still do.
“What did you do?”
“I stole a car with him.”
I rear back, confusion pulling at my brow. “A car? Is that it? You destroyed my life over a stolen car?”
“Well. There’s a little more, but that was the only crime I committed.”
I turned to him then, laying my hand on his chest. “And you didn’t think I would love you knowing that? You thought so little of me?” Hurt and anger color my words and I push off his lap to give myself some room to think and process his words. Jake sighs and hangs his hand between his knees in defeat unlike anything I’ve seen on him before, and I hate it. His head lifts and he holds my gaze with his own, anger, despair, fear, and regret swimming in those pools of green.
“I wasn’t the man I am now, Blossom. I owed the McKenzies everything and they did, and still do, treat me like family, but I never believed I deserved it or you, so I was terrified you’d hate me. I was a coward.”
“You’re lying. There’s more to this story.”
Jake hangs his head and blows out a breath. “Yes. After the Dean found the tape of you stealing the papers, I was going to go to him and tell him what really happened, but I got an email from Nick with a file attached.”
“He threatened you?”
Shame is a funny thing to see on such a proud man, and despite spending the majority of the last ten years wanting to see it, now I hate it more than anything.
“Tell me.” I move toward him and sink to my knees, my palm on his bristled cheek making him look up and I see so much love there that I don’t know what to do with it. I’m so angry still, and I know letting go of years of hatred won’t be easy.
“The file contained the name of the man whose car we stole. I never knew it and Hank said it was better not to know the details. I always went along with it, because by that point, I didn’t trust a single decision I made not to land me back in the shit.”
“Who was it?”
I know, even before he says the words, I know the only reason he would’ve hidden it from me is because the truth is just too awful. I shuffle back, dropping my hand from his touch as he reaches out to try and stop me, but I can feel my body shutting down, my emotions going cold before he even utters the words.
“It was your father.”
“No!”
I scramble back, almost tripping on my dress as I stand before he reaches for me. I step out of his reach as he falls to his knees in front of me, the bowtie he’s worn all night hanging loose around his neck, his hair disheveled from my fingers.
“Blossom, listen, it’s not true. The file was fake. It was all bullshit. The man we stole the car from did die, but two days earlier and it was nothing to do with us st ealing his car. His wife shot him after years of abuse. I was nowhere near your father’s car when it was stolen.”
“You promise?”
Relief hits me so hard that my legs give way and Jake catches me as we go down. His strong arms hold me as I shake, my emotions so scrambled that I don’t know what to feel. He cradles me against him as we sit like that on my living room floor for what feels like forever, both of us silent as we process the revelation.
Eventually, I slide out from under his arms and he lets me go as I step back, putting the coffee table I painstakingly restored between us. Jake watches me, his expression guarded and I don’t know how to let go of this anger.
“I don’t know where we go from here, Jake. You’ve told me what happened but it doesn’t change the outcome. I left Harvard, the place my father dreamed of going, under an ugly cloud. It colored every decision I made going forward. I gave up on my dream career. But what was so much worse was that I stopped believing in love. I fought not to fall for you. Then when I did, I fell so hard that when the rug was pulled away, I smashed into the rocks and I was left putting fragments of myself back together.”
Tears sting my eyes and, for once, I let them fall. If we’re to have any hope of making this right, he needs to see how his actions impacted my life.
“I know, baby.”
I shake my head. “No, you don’t know. I was destroyed. I couldn’t eat, I barely slept. I was a shell, and I was so ashamed for being a fool and falling for someone out of my league that I never shared a word of our time together with anyone for months. It was only when my mom dragged me to the doctor, thinking I was sick, that I got my shit together and realized that I didn’t even have the luxury of falling apart because I had people who needed me. Your actions did that.”
I hold my hand up as he goes to speak. “I know you didn’t mean it, I know you were in an awful spot, but if you had only trusted me, and believed me then this wouldn’t have happened. ”
My chest is heaving as I feel the last of the anger drain from me having allowed myself to voice aloud the pain I had felt. His scent surrounds me and all I want is to feel his arms around me, but I need him to understand. Forgiveness isn’t like flipping a switch, at least not for me. Yes, a burden has lifted tonight but it will take time for me to trust him again, if that is even what he wants. “You were a coward.” My voice is softer as I move to sit beside him.
Jake winces but he doesn’t shy away from my angry words or reach for me.
“I was. I chose my fear of losing your love over your future and lost anyway. I think in my head, I couldn’t stand the thought of you thinking I killed your dad. I hoped one day you’d forgive me for stealing your future. It was selfish and wrong and my biggest regret. I am truly, truly sorry, Blossom. If I live to be a thousand, I’ll never be able to make up for the pain I caused you, but I want to try.”
And just like that, my anger at him dies, turning to dust in the face of his truth and honesty. I crawl into his open arms and bury my head in his neck, as he holds me like I’m the most precious thing in the world. Had he denied my accusation or tried to defend himself, I might have fought harder to forgive him. But the truth is, he made a mistake from fear and as I sit in his arms on my living room floor, I’m not sure I would’ve done things any differently. Jake didn’t engineer what happened to hurt me, he didn’t knowingly put me in that position. He just made an impossible choice from two options that both had tragically heartbreaking outcomes.
“You picked the choice that would hurt me the least.”
His nod brushes his lips against my temple. “I knew if you thought you’d fallen in love with your father’s killer, it would destroy you. This way you lost but you got to hate me without hating yourself.”
It’s a bitter pill to swallow, but I know in my heart he’s right. I would’ve hated myself, and though his actions were to protect himself, I can see he was thinking of me too.
“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have called you a coward. ”
Jake’s arms flex around my waist. “You were right, I was a coward. I should have checked the facts but I panicked and when I did find out, I was too ashamed to come after you.”
“I’m not sure I would’ve listened back then. I can be a bit stubborn when I’m mad.”
Jake’s eyebrow rose and a smirk twitches on his lips. “A bit?”
“Oh, shut up.” I swat his chest and he catches my hand and brings my fingertips to his lips.
“What happens now?” I ask as butterflies flutter in my belly from his touch. “I do forgive you, Jake, but trusting you is going to take longer.”
He nods as he twines our fingers together, seeming to need the contact. “I know, Blossom. I have a lot of work to do to put right the wrongs I caused you, but if you give me the chance, I won’t ever let you down again.”
“You’d better not, I have friends that would happily help me hide your body if you fuck up again, Jake, and that includes Hunter.”
Jake chuckles, his eyes bright and full of love.
“You have my word.”
I nod, taking his word being my first act of trusting him. “So what now?”
“I need to handle Nick Kendrick. I won’t give him the chance to hurt us again. Hank has handled most of it, but I need to make sure the message is crystal clear.”
“Kendrick,” I say as the name once again tickles something at the back of my mind. “Why do I know that name?”
“He’s the CEO of KLM. At least for now.”
Recognition clouds my brain for a second before clearing. “Is that why he’s coming after the land?”
“Actually, he shouldn’t be an issue now.”
“Why won’t he be an issue?”
Jake smirks. “Well, it turns out Hank has some friends in very high, or maybe that’s low places.”
“Oh? ”
“Yeah, he’s friends with the Mancini family and has called in a favor as Kendrick is linked back to them.”
Something in his voice makes me take a second look at his face, and I realize right now how open he’s being with me. His expression hides nothing.
“Ask me, Blossom.”
His smirk makes me poke out my tongue. “Don’t act like you can read my mind.”
His hand skims up my calf and over the delicate flesh at the back of my knee, making me shiver.
“Oh, I can read that beautiful mind of yours better than you think.”
The air thickens with the heat of our arousal as my body leans closer, erasing the space between us as I straddle him. Jake’s hands go to my hips as the skirt of my dress pools around my thighs. Part of me wants to know how the Mancini family, a well-known mafia family, will deal with Kendrick, but right now I don’t care enough to pursue it. Not when Jake is here and we have a whole lot of time to make up for.
“Oh, yeah, and what’s on my mind right now?”
Jake’s deep chuckle sends a spark of heat straight to my clit.
“You need to make this harder, Blossom.”
I wriggled in his lap, my pussy grazing over his thick, hard cock. “It feels plenty hard enough to me.”
“Umm, she wants to play.” Jake grips my hips in his firm hold and directs my movements over his cock, my bare pussy soaking the fabric over his cock with my desire.
“Maybe.”
Palming the back of my head he brings my lips closer until we’re sharing the same breath. My heart races beneath his touch, excitement and the anticipation of being with him again, skin to skin, heightening every feeling.
“I know you want me. I know you’re terrified this will end badly, and I know that right now you don’t care because this is us. You and me, Blossom, the girl wi th the pink hair who pretends to give zero fucks, when all she does is care too much, and the boy who loves every single version of her.”
Then he slams his lips against mine and kisses me as if I’m the only oxygen he’ll ever need to breathe again. My skin prickles from the fire in his kiss, every sweep of his tongue like a brand. His fingers fist in my hair, the pinch of pain making me moan into his mouth as he tilts my head exactly how he wants it.
I’d forgotten what it’s like to kiss Jake. It was never an act just to get to the main event for him. He applied himself with as much passion to kissing me senseless as he did to fucking me until I screamed.
“Fuck, I missed this mouth.”
His words are a deep rasp against my skin, and I claw at his jacket, needing to feel his skin under my fingertips.
“Rip it, Blossom.”
His lips ghost down my neck as I tear at his shirt until the buttons pop and I finally get to feel all that warm, golden muscle under my fingertips.
“You taste so good and your scent. Fuck, I could get high on the smell of you.”
My hands feel frantic as I touch everywhere, never stopping in my haste to consume this feeling between us. My hands curl into his thick, silky soft hair and groan as he ups the rhythm of his hands on my hips so that I’m humping his cock like a wanton whore.
I’m shameless in my pursuit of my climax as he lifts his head to watch me.
“Come all over my cock, baby. Soak me with that pussy until it drips all over me.”
“Such a dirty mouth,” I gasp as my toes curl and my orgasm slams into me like a freight train.
Jake claims my lips and kisses me hard and deep, only slowing and turning his kiss into a lazy assault when my climax leaves me spent .
“I missed you, Jake.”
The admission is a lot for me and Jake knows it. He kisses me softly and stands with me in his arms. I wish I could say his act of strength wasn’t a turn-on but it would be a lie.
“Not done with you yet, Blossom. I never will be.”
“Then take me to bed and convince me to stay.”
I giggle as he slaps my ass. “Woman, behave or maybe I’ll punish you.”
“Hmm, maybe you should.”
A growl is the last thing he says before he’s carrying up my stairs, where the night is just beginning.