CHAPTER 2
“I have such a bad feeling about this, Jess,” Kate said as they sat down to eat lunch.
Jess regarded her ham-and-cheese roll. Since her meeting with Frank, she’d been dreading the thought of running into Adam again. But now she thought about it, it was very likely that he was hiding out in some spare office and didn’t want to see her either.
“I have to avoid him until I leave,” she said.
Kate blinked. “Him? Who? I’m talking about you going down to Linford Castle. What are you talking about?”
“Sorry! Thinking aloud!” Jess heaved a sigh.
“What’s the matter?”
“It’s Adam. He’s back.”
“No!”
“Yes. I saw him earlier. He came into Frank’s office when I was there.”
“And?” Kate’s expression softened.
“And nothing.” Jess’s gaze slid away. “He barely looked at me. Which is fine, Kate,” she continued firmly before Kate could say anything else. “I’m the one who ended things, remember? And look, six weeks in the country will be perfect.”
“Six weeks in Linford.” Kate sounded doubtful. “You might get a bit … restless, Jess.” She speared some Caesar salad with her fork and popped it into her mouth.
“While there’s a Hollywood movie being made?
” Jess shook her head. “Not a chance. Although I’ll probably be staying somewhere in the village.
The cast and crew are staying up at the castle.
” The more she thought about it, the more appealing it seemed.
In the last year everything had felt … off.
Ending things with Simon … everything with Adam.
Even if Kate was right and she did get restless, it beat having to face Adam every day.
“I’ll miss you.” Kate picked up her glass and sipped some water. “When are you going?”
Jess took a deep breath. “Early next week. They’re finding me somewhere to stay. Now, can we change the subject? Tell me how the wedding plans are going.”
Kate hesitated.
“Come on, Kate, you know I’m really happy for you guys! And I’m also more than happy to hear about weddings, as long as they’re not my own!”
Kate gave a reluctant laugh, brightening visibly as she filled Jess in about the cake, her flowers and the latest dress fitting.
It was strange how things had worked out so well, Jess thought.
Less than a year ago, she’d been about to marry Simon.
But she had no regrets about their eleventh-hour decision to call it off.
It had taken Kate and Simon just over four weeks to officially admit what neither of them had dared for so long – that they were completely in love with each other and had been for a long time.
“Oh, I nearly forgot to tell you,” Kate said, interrupting her thoughts. “Simon has a buyer for the apartment.”
“That’s brilliant!” Jess smiled.
When Simon had proposed to Kate, the most immediate problem had been where they should live. For the sake of her ten-year-old son Luke, and her widowed dad who lived beside her, Simon had agreed to move in with them.
“Listen, about the wedding,” Jess said. “Feel free to invite someone else on my plus one.”
Kate was about to respond when something behind Jess caught her attention.
“Jess, don’t look around.”
“Why?” Jess started to turn but Kate put a hand on her arm.
“Because Adam has just walked in. And I think he’s coming this way.”
“Nooo, I have to go!” Jess lurched forward in her seat as panic surged through her. “I can’t be here when –”
“Hello, Kate. Hello, Jess.”
Reluctantly, Jess looked up. The shock of seeing Adam earlier in Frank’s office had clearly scrambled her brain.
Say something, Jess. Just keep it polite and professional.
You can do that. God, it was like one of those anxiety dreams where no matter how hard she tried to speak, nothing came out.
He looked exactly the same. The well-tailored suit, that thick, dark hair that had a habit of falling slightly across his …
wait, had those little creases in his forehead always been there?
Or was he just frowning at her? Yep, he was frowning.
Briefly, she met deep-blue eyes before glancing away.
Why had he bothered to come over? Why couldn’t he be normal and just pretend he hadn’t seen them instead of making things awkward and complicated? She didn’t need Adam and his frowny face.
Except now he was smiling at Kate. “How are the wedding plans going?”
Kate beamed back. “Um, really well. Less than eight weeks now.”
“You must be excited,” Adam said.
“We both are, yeah.”
Kate smile widened slightly before she shot Jess a sympathetic look and got to her feet.
“I’d, er, better get back to the office,” she said.
Traitor! Jess stood up so quickly she nearly lost her balance.
“Can we talk, Jess?” There was a trace of uncertainty in Adam’s voice.
Jess looked at her friend. She couldn’t make a scene. And she couldn’t drag Kate into this – it wasn’t fair.
“You’d better go ahead,” she said to Kate. She hoped Adam couldn’t hear the wobble in her voice. “I’ll catch you later.”
Kate gave a small smile and left.
Adam gestured to the table. “Let’s sit down?”
Jess slid back into her seat, bracing herself as he opened his jacket and took the chair Kate had just vacated. Her stomach squeezed at the familiar scent of the subtle, woodsy aftershave he always wore. Shit, why had she agreed to this? Her brain was going to be scrambled for the rest of the day.
“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you I was coming back,” he said. “And I wouldn’t have just walked into Frank’s office earlier if I’d known you were there.”
She tried to wet her lips. “You don’t owe me any explanation, Adam.”
He’d simply disappeared a few weeks after their split.
Jess had assumed he’d gone back to their European headquarters in Switzerland and, before she was tempted to get in touch, she’d blocked him on her phone and unfollowed him on Instagram – the single bit of social media he used.
She waited for him to mention what she’d done, but he said nothing. He probably hadn’t even noticed.
You don’t owe me anything. “You’ve as much right to be here in the Dublin office as I have.”
“Maybe, but we haven’t seen each other since –”
“Don’t.” She swallowed painfully. “You’re making way too big a deal of this.” She couldn’t risk him mentioning the miscarriage or the fact that today had been her due date. If he’d even remembered ... “I have to get back to work.”
“Jess, wait!” He sighed and rubbed a hand across his face.
She risked a closer look. There were tiny crows’ feet at the corners of his eyes. Were they new?
“I’m sorry for the way things ended. I probably should have …” He seemed to be searching for the right words. “I thought you needed space. And then other things got in the way. But you weren’t to know that.”
Other things got in the way? That was what people said, wasn’t it? It was the classic get-out-of-jail-free card. Christ, he must have felt so trapped – and been so relieved when she’d ended things.
She’d tried hard to tell herself the miscarriage was somehow meant to be, that she’d heal, that now she and Adam had time to get to know one another properly.
But she hadn’t been able to do it. Instead, she’d taken two weeks’ sick leave, packed up her things and gone home to her parents.
After those two weeks, he’d stopped calling.
At first, Jess had been too numb to care.
Later, she’d managed to convince herself it was for the best. By the time she’d returned to work, he’d left, and she’d heard nothing from him since.
“What happened was for the best, Adam.” Jess dug her nails into her palms, watching a range of emotions cross his face. She stood again, her legs trembling with the effort of pretending. “I really need to get back.”
“Frank told me you’re heading down to Linford while it’s being hired out for the movie.”
“Yes.”
“Don’t go on my account, Jess. I won’t be in Dublin for long.”
So he wanted to keep his distance too. She should be happy that they were on the same page, but it felt like another slap.
“Honestly, Adam, it doesn’t matter to me whether you stay or go.”
Before he could say anything else, she left, trying not to run towards the door.
Outside, she slipped on her sunglasses, her eyes stinging as she walked back to the office.
Adam was a stark warning of what happened when she rushed headlong into something.
She’d email Anthony Neary to see how early she could leave for Linford. It was vital to put as much distance as she could between her and Adam.