Chapter 29 #2
WORLD’S WORST NEIGHBOR:
A visit means a lot. It’s hard being away.
MEG:
Even though you love your job?
WORLD’S WORST NEIGHBOR:
It’s only a job. It sure as hell doesn’t miss me when I’m not here
MEG:
So I just show up?
WORLD’S WORST NEIGHBOR:
The best time is dinner. A little notice is helpful.
MEG:
Do I bring something?
WORLD’S WORST NEIGHBOR:
Not necessary, but if you want to win over my crew, bring ice cream
I laugh. I’ve never been inside a fire station. The idea of being a guest in one, surrounded by all that male energy, sends a thrill zipping beneath my skin. Plus I’d get to see Linden in uniform. I fan my face.
My phone rings. I pounce. It’s Linden.
“Hi.” It comes out breathy and fast. I can barely contain the fluttery high ramping up inside me.
“Hi,” he replies. Though I can’t see his face, I can hear the smile in his tone. “What are you up to today?
“Breakfast date with my dad.”
“That’s great,” he says, his tone warm and caring. “Are you going to talk about Darienne and the party?
I pour coffee into my favorite mug. “I don’t want to hurt him. ”
“Don’t you think he’d want to know what’s going on? How you feel?”
“He’s been alone for a long time.”
“Doesn’t make it okay.”
He’s right. “How would you react if Greta shared something like that with you?”
“Honored,” he replies. “If she can’t stand up to me, someone who loves her unconditionally until I take my last breath, then who can she stand up to?”
“Okay, superdad,” I say with a scoff.
“Your dad can have a healthy relationship with Darienne and you. But not if you don’t give him the opportunity to try. He’s not a mind reader.”
I try to shed my anxiety with a forceful exhale. “What if I lose him anyway?”
What if I’ve already lost him?
Linden gives a thoughtful hmm . It reminds me of the subtle way he touches me, like he can read how much I need it. Maybe I shouldn’t think of it as an offer of support, but a part of me already has. “Then you put crabs in Darienne’s underwear drawer.”
I giggle. “That won’t solve my problem, though.”
He grunts. “No, but it’s guaranteed to make you feel better.”
“Thanks for making me laugh.”
“Anytime, shortcake.”
“Be safe today,” I say as longing tightens inside my chest.
“Always.”
During my drive to Love Buzz, I give myself a pep talk. If I can’t weave the party into the conversation, I can always kick it off with an “I feel” statement. I feel hurt by the way Darienne treats me. Or I could really shock him with: I feel sad that you seem to have stopped caring about me .
Linden’s compassionate, wise words are like a warm hug around my heart.
What happened to you was terrible, and it hurt you deeply. You deserve to take as much time and employ whatever resources as you need for those wounds to heal.
In the bright light of day, this feels even more true. Gratitude for Linden being brave enough to share his past heartbreaks and the rocky road he traveled to heal himself is like a warm, steady wind filling my sails.
Inside Love Buzz, I scan the space for Dad. He’s always early. When I spot him, my nerves soften a little bit. Part of me expected him to be with Darienne, even though I followed up with just the two of us? when we finalized our plans yesterday.
Dad stands up as I approach. He gives me a calm smile, and we hug. I inhale his Old Spice scent and savor his bear-like squeeze, and when we sit down, we both start talking at once.
An hour later, we’re hugging again and making a promise to make breakfast just the two of us a more regular event.
I didn’t divulge all of my feelings, but I shared that I missed him.
He seemed surprised, and revealed that my divorce had shaken him more than he understood at the time.
“Maybe I’m old fashioned, but when you married Russ, I tried to take a step back.
Let you live your life. I quit worrying about you.
So when you two split…I sort of locked up. I didn’t know what you needed.”
I put my hand over his. “I just need you to still be my dad.”
He looked relieved. “Okay, Meggers. I think I can do that.”
We talked a little bit about Linden. “Is he good to you?” Dad asked, compassion edging his serious gaze.
My smile must have impressed him, because he laughed and shook his head.
“Okay, maybe don’t answer that.”
We were almost finished with our breakfast when he brought up the party.
“I figured out that Darienne rigged things so she’d get credit,” he said, looking sheepish.
I stared at him in shock. “Why didn’t you say anything?”
He gave me a tentative shrug. “She’s not confident like you, Megs.
She sometimes feels…intimidated. And I thought, you know, if it was so important to her to feel like she’d participated, what was the harm?
But she took it too far.” He reached for my hand.
“I saw your face that night, after the slide show. I realized later what it meant: that you got hurt. That was not my intention. It was an incredibly memorable night, honey. Thank you for everything that you did to make it happen. I’ll never forget it. ”
Tears stung the corners of my eyes, but I smiled and squeezed his hand. “You’re welcome, Dad.”
“And I’ll…talk to Darienne. I want her to apologize. What she did wasn’t fair to you.”
I smiled at him through my emotions. “Okay.”
Outside the café, the warm summer sun heating my shoulders, we hugged goodbye one last time.
I practically skipped to the grocery store and bought all my favorite snacks and several dinner options.
Then when I couldn’t decide between strawberry ice cream, Moose Tracks, or lemon gelato, I bought all three.
Back at home, after unloading everything, I change into my suit and race to the end of Linden’s newly completed dock, and cannonball off the end.
The cold water swallows me, bathing my hot skin with a thousand tiny kisses, and a thought rises to the surface almost as fast as I do: I’m happier right now than I’ve been in a long, long time.
The only thing missing from my life is Mom, but she’s here with me. Always.
Later, after my swim, I read my book in the sunshine, the cool lake breeze on my skin, until it’s time to get ready for my visit to the fire station. I text Linden my plan to bring ice cream, turn on a playlist, and head upstairs to shower.