1. Liam
CHAPTER 1
liam
PRESENT DAY
The floodlights blur past me before they disappear altogether in my rearview mirror as I drive out of the distillery property and pull onto the open country road. I grip the steering wheel of my Ford F-250 and focus on the empty road in front of me, the familiar flutter of anticipation stirring in my chest just as it has every Thursday for the last five years. It’s the one day a week that is guaranteed to be spent with my best friend, just the two of us, no interruptions.
My headlights barely cut through the pitch black of the night, the only light the glow from the moon above me, casting shadows from the tall Sitka spruce trees that line the long, winding road. I live for the quiet stillness of nights like these, when the sky is so dark it looks endless, when the world is asleep and there is only you and your thoughts. I was born and raised in Aspen Ridge, Washington and I would probably suffocate to death in a city.
Some people grow up in small country towns and count down the days until they jet off to bigger, brighter, and better, but not me. Aspen Ridge buried itself deep within my bones and is just as much a part of me as I am it.
I love our small community, but mostly, I love the location. Nestled on the coast of Washington State, it’s a secluded gem hidden under the watchful protection of the Olympic Mountains, with the Pacific Ocean at our back. There’s a sense of peace here that’s not found in the concrete jungle, as if everything moves slower, suspended in time while the rest of the world continues on at a rapid pace.
Snow falls lightly from the sky, hitting my windshield and immediately melting away as I take each bend in the road, just like I’ve done thousands of times. As I near the edge of Downtown Aspen Ridge, the tiny gold twinkling Christmas lights that stay wrapped around light poles year-round come into view, like a beacon leading me in.
Snow crunches under my tires as I slow my speed, taking the turn down an alley just big enough for one vehicle, barely wide enough for my big-ass truck. Parking behind the brick building, I eagerly climb out, grabbing the cold beer from the passenger seat that I know she’s looking forward to drinking with me. Pizza, beer, horror movies, no phones, no cancellations. It’s been our rule, and we’ve stuck with it, prioritizing detoxing together and not feeling the pressure of any of the responsibilities weighing on either of us.
Walking into Hannah’s after the long week I had, I’m ready for our weekly movie night. The door was left unlocked like usual, so after taking off my snow-caked boots, I step out of the cold Washington winter air and into the warmth of the little loft apartment, eyeing the pizza on the kitchen counter waiting for me. Her apartment sits above her family’s coffee shop and bakery—Bean Haven. It’s small and cozy, and just like Hannah has done with everything else she touches, she’s made it a vibrant and happy home for her and her three-year-old daughter, Charlotte.
“Hey, beauty. You ready to argue over which horror movie we’re watching tonight?” I shout out, dropping the beer next to the pizza. When I don’t hear her reply, I leave the kitchen to find her, kicking myself in the ass because she’s probably putting Charlie to bed. As I round the corner, the door to her room is slightly ajar and I push it open a bit more, peering in at the little girl’s sleeping form. She’s cozied up in a bed I built her that looks like a little house. After watching her back rise and fall for a moment, I close the door, moving through the apartment to continue my search for Hannah.
Soft whimpers hit my ears before my eyes are on her, my heart squeezing painfully in my chest. There’s something about seeing Hannah cry that triggers me, like I’m fucking helpless, and it makes me feral. There’s not much I hate more than seeing her sad, but I’m willing to do anything to take her pain away.
Pushing through the bedroom door, I finally see her, rolled up into a ball on her bed, squeezing a pillow to drown out her cries. My heart constricts, that well-known ache in my chest a vise grip as my knees sink into the mattress, body on autopilot. I settle in behind her, pulling her by the hip until her back connects with my chest, cocooning her body with mine in comfort.
“I’m here, beauty. What happened?” I whisper, my lips against the back of her head as I do my best to console her.
She turns in my arms, burying her face into my chest and gripping my T-shirt with her fists. Ever since we were little kids, nothing could get me pissed off faster than seeing Hannah Haven cry. There’s nothing that can bring me to my knees faster than seeing her upset. I would gladly light the match that sets the world up in flames if it meant she never had to feel an ounce of pain again.
“I hate him,” she whimpers, her tone thick with anger.
“What did he do this time?” It’s difficult to hold back the animosity I hold for her boyfriend, Charlotte’s deadbeat sperm donor. Hannah and Levi had a string of one-night stands four years ago that resulted in the creation of Charlie, who’s now almost four. He never wanted anything serious and has made that clear since the beginning. For some reason, Hannah has it in her pretty little head that since she shares a child with the douche-canoe-shit-bag, she’s stuck with him. He works in Seattle as a commercial fisherman and has used that as his excuse to never be around. I know she doesn’t love him, but she feels stuck with him, even though she owes him no loyalty.
“I’m tired of him making plans and never following through. He never calls Charlotte when he’s scheduled to, and I know she’s not even four yet, but she has no idea who he is. He promises to come into town when he’s not on the boat, but he never does. I thought we would make this work, be a family. That was the plan. My parents are expecting us to get married.”
“What?” I breathe the words incredulously. To say this comes as a complete shock would be an understatement.
She huffs a deep breath. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you until now. I’m just so lost. My mom doesn’t want to go back and forth anymore between California and Washington. She refuses to spend winters in AR as it is, they’re moving there permanently.” She sighs, her breath warm against my chest, my shirt wet with tears. “With my grandma getting older, and Harlow and Hailey doing mother knows what, they gave me an ultimatum—settle down with Levi here and prove to them that I’ve got my shit together, or they’ll sell Bean Haven, and I can move to California with them so they can help me with Charlie. They don’t think I’ll be able to handle it all long-term in Aspen Ridge unless I’m in a stable position, because apparently single moms can’t run a business and be a parent simultaneously. It’s bullshit. And outdated. And patriarchal. I’ve been working at and running this place since I was a teenager.”
I do my best to remain calm, knowing she doesn’t need me to come out swinging, raging like an out-of-control, hot-headed caveman like my two older brothers would. But I’m about to lose my shit, and it’s taking every ounce of self-control that I have not to blow. Like fuck is Hannah leaving me. Over my dead body will the two of them move to California because her parents can’t get their heads out of their asses and see that their daughter is already settled and stable. She’s doing the damn thing all on her own.
“Fuck,” I huff, flicking off my hat and running my hands through my hair. “I’m so sorry. They seriously put that on you? That’s such bullshit, Han, and you don’t deserve that. They’re not taking Bean Haven from you, and you’re definitely not moving to California, like hell will that be happening. Do they not see how happy you are here? You’re doing amazing things all on your own. We’ll figure this out.” Because we have to.
Hannah’s parents can be great, but they still look at her as that lost teenager who never quite fit in with anyone around her, who always pushed the boundaries and went through life to her own beat. She dropped out of college because she knew she wanted to run Bean Haven. That, plus the unplanned pregnancy, and they’ve never quite looked at her like she had the ability to be successful or stand on her own, even though that’s exactly what she’s doing.
It’s fucking bullshit and has put a strain on my relationship with her parents, who’ve known me my entire life. This just makes it all that much worse. Hannah is the strongest, hardest worker I’ve ever met. Not to mention the best mom, she gives her all to Charlotte. Hell, she gives her all to everything she does, and she does it with a smile on her face. Because that’s just who Hannah is. But, at some point, if someone gets knocked down enough, they start to expect it and just stay down. I’ll be damned if I let that happen to her.
“They feel so strongly about it, bear. Like, how could I possibly be a single mom, run a bakery, and survive in the world on my own? They’ll never believe in me. It’s fucked. I’m fucked. Apparently, I’ve been sucked through a time portal where I need to leave my father’s home and go directly to my husband’s, and if there is no husband, then I need to go back to my father’s.” Her voice cracks on the last word as the tears flow freely, not ashamed or worried about how she looks right now, or how vulnerable she is. I love that she is always one hundred percent herself with me—unashamed, honest, and raw. I wouldn’t have it any other way.
“Han, it’s their issue, because you’re not fucking leaving. We just need to figure out how you can keep the bakery, and it won’t be an issue. You and I both know you’re kicking ass in every area of your life. Your parents, Levi, anyone who doesn’t support you, is missing out on seeing you grow. I’m damn fucking proud of you.”
“I love you for saying that. The shit with Levi though, bear.” She continues to vent, and I listen to every word. “I really had it in my head that we would get married and be a family because we shared a baby and cared about each other. But I’m stupid and delusional, it’s been years. I actually hate him. Why the hell would I want to marry him? All I wanted was to give Charlotte a family, and I can’t even do that. Why aren’t we enough?”
“Hannah, you are enough. You’re more than enough. Levi is just a selfish bastard who can’t see past his own shit. Don’t you dare think you and that little girl aren’t enough. You two are everything, do you hear me?”
Hannah cries herself to sleep in my arms as I lightly rub her back, my fingers trailing up the length of her spine and back down again. She gives off this tough girl, can’t-penetrate-her-defenses exterior, but those lucky enough to know her like I do get glimpses of her soft side too. She has never cared what anyone thinks and has always worn the confidence of a warrior, but when it comes to providing a life for her family, she is much more delicate.
I gently push her beautiful, lavender-colored hair out of her face and take a moment to watch her sleep. She’s going to survive this, and I’m going to make damn sure of it. There are moments when life shifts whether you’re ready for it or not. This is one of mine. I won’t let her parents take her from everything she loves. And I sure as shit won’t let Levi be what breaks her. He needs to get his goddamn priorities straight. This ends now. One way or another.
My fist connects with the solid wood door in three rapid knocks, purposefully louder than they should be. The night is chilly, but I don’t register the cold, anger and adrenaline pumping through my veins making my body feel hot. I pace for a moment on the stoop of the apartment in Downtown Seattle, removing my hat and running my hands through my hair as frustration courses through me. Putting my hat on backwards, I lift my fist to knock again just as it swings open. Levi stands in front of me, bleary-eyed from the sleep I just pulled him from, slightly shorter than I am, and much thinner. He’s a lanky motherfucker and with his shaved head, he looks more like a propaganda poster for the U.S. Air Force than he does a Seattle fisherman.
“What the fuck do you want?”
Ahh. Good morning motherfucker, my old nemesis. Rise and fucking shine, asshole. You get to deal with me today.
“For you to stop fuckin’ around in Seattle and get your ass back to AR to take care of your family. Enough is enough, Levi,” I grind out.
“How about you mind your own goddamn business for a change, huh, Liam? Always gotta come to her rescue. She really that pathetic she’s gotta sic her bulldog on me? Get back in your fuckin’ truck and don’t come back here.”
“Levi? What’s going on, I can hear you yelling from the bedroom.”
Levi stiffens as a little blonde waltzes up behind him and tucks herself into his side. I’ve never thought Levi was faithful to Hannah, but it’s the swollen, pregnant belly that I can’t take my eyes off of and stuns me silent. Slowly, I turn my attention back on Levi, and I see the moment he registers how fucked he is, my face surely giving him the vibes that back that up. My hands ball into fists at my sides, and the petite female bristles, taking a step back to retreat farther into the apartment. Smart girl. She wouldn’t want to watch her man get pummeled to death in his doorway.
“It’s time for you to go,” the piece of shit says to me.
I lean forward into his space and whisper, “You ever show your fucking face back in AR, I’ll fucking kill you myself.”
“If I wanted to be there, I’d be there. But I’m here. Tell her to take a hint.”
My arm cocks back in an automatic response to punch this motherfucker right in the teeth—like I’ve done before—but I stop myself. He’s a sleazy asshole and it’ll only make things worse for Hannah. Turning on my heels and jogging down the steps, I pull myself into my truck and spin out—snow, dirt, and salt picked up and spraying—eager to get the fuck home to figure out how to deal with this disaster.
The drive back to Aspen Ridge is more than three hours, and given the time now, I’ll be lucky to get home in time to take a nap before showing up for work. Which means I’ve got the next few hours to figure out how the fuck I’m going to tell my best friend that her “boyfriend” and father of her daughter is a lying, two-timing, low-life piece of dogshit that shouldn’t have been allowed to breathe the same air as her from the beginning, let alone be inside her.
To add the cherry on her shit sundae, the ultimatum she received from her parents is contingent on her marrying that asshole. Her life is about to be blown to bits, and it fucking figures that I have to be the one who pulls the clip.
Hannah and I have known each other our entire lives, and in that time, I’ve never left her side. Through the fun elementary years, the awkwardness of middle school, to high school, when we both started to morph into mini adults, all the way to planning to go to college together. I was there through her unexpected pregnancy with Charlotte, and even caught that little girl as she rushed to enter the world on Hannah’s kitchen floor, and now I have to be the one to set off a massive fucking bomb in the center of her world. Being away from Hannah while I was in college was torture, now that Charlotte is in the mix? Fuck that. I will do anything to help Hannah keep Bean Haven, and her parents will have to pry both of them from my cold dead hands before they move to California. She has all the support she needs here. The two of them leaving Aspen Ridge isn’t even an option.
My palm connects with the steering wheel as I hit it repeatedly, pissed that anyone in this world could willingly hurt the two most perfect people in it. Hannah and Charlie are everything that is good, and they deserve someone who will put them first and show up for them. Levi has always been a deadbeat dad and an even worse boyfriend. He was all too satisfied to fuck Hannah, but the moment she got pregnant, he suddenly had better shit to do. He’s been dicking her around for years, and I’ll be damned if it continues after this.
Instead of going home, I turn onto the long dirt road that leads to the distillery and drive my truck around to the back parking lot. It’s about five in the morning, too late (or early) to have a drink, so I throw myself into the work that brings me peace. I head to the vats to try to focus on my new project but after a few hours, I can’t shake the anger that threatens to consume me. Picking up my phone, I call my brother, Dallas, only for it to go to voicemail after several rings. I’m one of five siblings, and most of the time it’s a madhouse of uncontrolled chaos, heavy banter, and fistfights with a whole lot of love and loyalty. But Dallas is the glue, and if I have a problem, he’s who I want to talk to.
“Marcus!” I snap at our intern as he pulls into his parking spot near where I’m pacing outside, the freezing winter air biting at my skin and keeping me awake.
“Yes, sir? What can I do for you?”
I sling my arm around his shoulders and pull him close. He tries to slink away, clearly intimidated by me. Good. He needs to listen and get my dumbass brother.
“This is what’s going to happen. You’re going to go into the office building and park your ass right outside Dallas’ door and you aren’t going to move until he gets there.”
“Of course. Consider it done,” he says as he starts to pull away.
“Oh, no. That’s not all. When you see him, I want you to tell him, verbatim, ‘get your ass to the fucking fermenting vats.’ Can you do that, Marcus?” I say as I squeeze his shoulder firmly.
“Yep. You got it. On my way . . . right . . . now,” he replies as he finally dislodges from my hold. I turn quickly and head back inside, irritated as fuck that the one time I actually need something important, the brother I want to talk to is busy doing God knows what.
My oldest brother, Sawyer, is without a doubt busy with his new wife, Ivy. Dallas is Sawyer’s twin and typically readily available to all of us. Carter is the youngest male and is always busy with either work, marketing, or his playboy lifestyle. Then there’s our little sister, Kinsey. She graduated from college a year early and started her first year teaching at Aspen Ridge Elementary School last September.
Unable to sit still, my footsteps echo through the room as I pace back and forth, running my hands, almost obsessively, through my thick hair, wondering when the hell Dallas will show up, when the door finally opens.
“Hey, man, you summoned me?”
“Yeah, I’m losing my shit and I need you to talk me off the ledge. You weren’t answering your damn phone.”
His face falls momentarily. God knows what the fuck he was doing.
“What’s going on? Tell me what you need.”
“It’s fuckin’ Hannah. I’m so goddamn tired of Levi jerking her around. I’m so sick of seeing her treated like shit over and over and over again. You know where I was last night? Fuckin’ holding her while she cried because she’s running on fumes.”
Dallas looks at me like he already knows that my night didn’t end holding Hannah through her meltdown.
“What’d you do, Liam?”
“I drove to Seattle to find the asshole and tell him to get his ass back in Aspen Ridge and take care of his family. And you know what I found?”
“Shit, man. Does Hannah know?”
“Know that her lying, piece of shit baby daddy that she thinks she’s still involved with has a girlfriend he’s living with? That she’s fucking pregnant!”
“Oh, fuck.”
Rage hits me like a tidal wave all over again. I need to fucking hit something.
“You didn’t beat the shit out of him, did you? That’s the last thing Hannah needs to deal with.”
“I saw it, right in front of me at his door, and I turned and left. Dal, it was the hardest fucking thing I’ve ever done, and the longer I stay here and keep it from her . . . fuck. I want to fucking kill him. How could he do that to them?”
“We’ll all get her through it, they’re going to be okay.”
“You don’t get it. Her parents want to cut her off, Dallas. With Ms. Nettie getting older, unless Hannah gets married and settles down, they’re selling Bean Haven. Her mom is sick of going back and forth every winter and they want to move to San Diego permanently.”
And bring Hannah and Charlie with them. Not that I’m going to let that fucking happen.
“What kind of fucked-up ultimatum is that?”
You’re telling me. Hannah is such a free spirit and will never complain. She takes everything she’s given as a gift and is the happiest person I’ve ever met. Even when she’s dealt shitty blows by the people she loves, she just takes it, adapts, and moves on. Not this time. This time, the weight of it all is crushing her. I’m not about to sit back and let it.
“I don’t know how to tell her about Levi. I want to go put him six feet under. That’s what he fuckin’ deserves.”
“I agree with you, brother, but that’s not how this can be handled. Levi’s a fucking weasel and he’ll make Hannah’s life hell because of it.”
“What do I do?”
Because right now, outside of committing murder, I don’t know what to do anymore. The idea of causing her pain is killing me.
“Just sleep on it. You know her better than anyone else. But you get your shit straight and then talk to her. You’ll know what to do.”
How the fuck do I fix this for her?