Chapter 1
R ada
The screech of the packing tape across the final box drowned out my sister’s sniffling from the front room. A sense of anticipation bubbled in my chest as I stared around at the blank room. This was it. We’d packed our lives up and we were going to make a fresh start in the UK.
I picked the box up and hauled it into the entranceway, stacking it on top of two others.
A friend would keep them until we had a permanent place to send them.
We’d sold most of our parents’ possessions, and the furniture was part of the flat sale.
I entered the main room and found my sister Angelina—Lina—still sitting by the window in her painting chair.
She stared at the empty armchair where our father used to sit day and night until recently.
She startled as she realised I was here, leaping to her feet, her long dark hair tangled about her face.
“I’m sorry. I got distracted,” she said in English.
We hadn’t spoken Bulgarian since Father passed, opting to use English to prepare for moving to the UK. Luckily, we were both good at languages, plus we’d been practising for years as the long-term plan had always been for us to move to Britain.
“It’s okay to miss them.” I opened my arms, and she strode into my chest.
Lina was a sensitive soul and felt the loss of our parents keenly. She’d cared for our mother, who died last year, and then I’d returned from my nursing job in the UK to help her care for our father, who never recovered from the loss of his wife.
“You cope better than me. I couldn’t do this without you,” she mumbled.
“What did I tell you when you finally admitted how bad things had got after Mother died? I said that you didn’t have to cope alone.
That’s why I came back. I hate that we lost Father so soon after losing her, but we’re going to start a new life.
” I cupped her cheeks and wiped the tears.
“You are strong, Lina, but together we are stronger.”
I missed our parents, but I’d learnt to hide my emotions working as a nurse.
Plus, there was so much still to do for the move.
I was the eldest and had been to the UK before.
Lina was sheltered and a little na?ve, often painting or sculpting in her own little world.
I had to be the tough one to keep us together.
“Remember why we got these tattoos.” I touched the butterfly tattoo on my thigh.
We’d got matching ones to symbolise our new lives. We’d always planned to come to the UK together, as there were so many better employment options there.
“I am excited, but then I feel guilty about that,” Lina admitted.
“They always wanted us to be happy. Think of all those big UK galleries where you could sell your paintings. Then you’ll be rich and you can look after my old lady bones.”
“You are only twenty-eight.” She rolled her eyes.
“Some days, it feels like fifty-eight.”
She smiled a watery smile and smoothed her hair down.
Lina had a cleaning job lined up, and I had another hospital nursing job in a different area of the country from where I worked before.
We had temporary accommodation organised, and once we were set up, Lina could paint and start to get the art out there.
This company took care of everything, and we’d be travelling at the end of the week.
“Tell me something you are looking forward to.” I gripped her upper arms, determined to keep the hope on her face alive.
When we were younger, we used to play thought experiments. Imagine if you lived somewhere else, or imagine if you had unlimited money, and so on.
“Seeing the countryside,” she said.
I sighed. “It is beautiful there. Not quite as much as where our grandparents lived.”
“I used to love the summers there. So many things to paint.”
“There’s not much outside this window to inspire you.” I gestured at the opposite block of flats.
“I don’t know. If you look closely enough, you’ll always find beauty.”
That was the main difference between us. Lina always saw the best in situations—the beauty, even in our flat, housed inside a post-communist design, twin tower, whose multicoloured facade had faded into washed-out pastels, and graffiti lined the inner corridors.
“I think moving somewhere new will inspire me.” A radiant smile broke out across her face, and seeing a little of her grief lift was nice.
I vowed we’d find a new, better life together.