Chapter 2
T he ride back to Lowell’s place is a quiet one, which I’m fine with.
I think we’ve said far too much to each other already, so I don’t mind the silence.
To be honest, I don’t think he does either since his mood seems more upbeat now, instead of racked with nerves and fearful of possibly saying the wrong thing.
I clear my throat but don’t offer any words.
I want to maintain the silence for as long as I can, but I also really want a fucking cigarette.
I wonder if he’d be willing to stop at a gas station on the way back to his place, but unfortunately until he pays me, I can’t even afford a pot to piss in right now.
He reaches a hand over and gives my thigh a gentle, almost reassuring squeeze, and I glance over at him.
His eyes are still on the road ahead of us, but I see a small smile creep up the corners of his lips.
I want him to be comfortable with me, so I reach over and rest a hand on top of his and return the gesture.
Lowell uses a thumb to gently rub the arch of my hand before he pulls his away, placing it back on the steering wheel.
“That was nice. Thank you for that,” I say softly.
He glances at me, the smile a little wider and a little shyer on his face as he places the same hand that gently caressed mine on the console between us, palm up, extending an invitation to me.
I know I shouldn’t, but at this point it’s obvious that he’s no ordinary John, and this isn’t going to be a routine night, so I let my hand fall into his and turn my face away as he closes his firmly, but gently around it.
I guess that’s his way of saying I’m his, and he’s not wrong.
Everything has a price—people included—and when you pay for something, you own it.
Since I’m still very cautious about this entire situation, I’m considering myself lucky just to be rented for a while.
I’m hoping that he won’t get sick of me after tonight, because I really would love my own little place.
Short-term lease apartments are a dime a dozen in Fairbanks, and I can’t help but think of the possibilities if I had somewhere to call my very own.
I should know better than to let myself think of the unattainable because that’s how I’ve been let down so many times before, but there’s something different about Lowell.
Something inviting, if not mysterious, and I don’t think he’d be taking me back to his actual home unless he planned on keeping his word.
At least I hope not.
I let out a deep sigh and he begins to rub my hand with his thumb again. He can sense my tension, if not feel it, and he’s doing his best to help me relax. It’s funny how the tables have turned so quickly and even funnier how I can find such a small comfort in the hands of a stranger.
I have a good feeling about Lowell, and
even though his generous offer remains to be seen on follow through, I think things will be okay for a little while now.