10. Felix
TEN
FELIX
Call me a flake but I changed my mind. About screwing Hayworth, that is.
I still need to go on a date with the guy or I’m not sure either Elsa, nor Arya, or even Cheyenne who decided all of a sudden she’s also invested in my love life, would let me forget it.
I want to get down and dirty. I do. But…I don’t know what it is, but as soon as Hayworth is out of my peripheral vision I come to my senses. Which is why I’ve added an elastic band to my accessories tonight. So I can snap myself out of it if I come anywhere close to succumbing to this man. I’m already tempted enough. I don’t need to tempt fate.
I would have cancelled. I probably should have. But the girls…damn I don’t think I’ve ever seen them so cheerful in a while. The whole day after meeting Hayworth at Special Blend they’ve been allies—against me, mind, but allies nonetheless. I’m sure I can survive one date with Hayworth if it means my girls act like sisters and not enemy forces. It’s bad enough we’re on the verge of World War III—I don’t need it starting in my house.
So yeah. That’s why I’m here. That’s why I’m out. For the girls. For my peace of mind.
Even if I wasn’t, as soon as I open the door, I become certain.
“You are single, right?” As if I’d do anything if I was still happily married. Or married, full stop.
I march right to his car and I wait by the door for him to unlock it but instead he stands there, with a raised eyebrow.
“Do you expect me to open the door for you?”
I snort. “No, I’m waiting for you to unlock the car!”
He laughs, the fucker. What did I say that was so funny? I huff at him but I can’t lie. That sound makes me feel some kind of way deep down inside. His laugh is deep and guttural and it reverberates through me just as strong, making me desperate for oxygen as if I’ve been denied it for years.
“What’s so funny?”
“It’s unlocked already,” he says.
I roll my eyes and pull the handle. Yup. Unlocked. “How was I supposed to know that?”
He laughs again.
“Where did you live before Maplewood?”
“Why?” I ask.
“Big city, right?”
I sigh and nod.
“No one locks their cars around here. Especially just to knock on your door.”
“Whatever,” I answer and get in, feeling slightly embarrassed.
“Hell, most people don’t even lock their front doors around here,” Hayworth continues as he climbs in too and turns the ignition on.
“That sounds dangerous. And stupid,” I tell him, although…isn’t that why I picked Maplewood? Because it’s such a welcoming, friendly place?
The problem is, even if I had gotten used to living in a small town, I would never not lock my doors. Not after what we’ve been through.
“Welcome to life in a small town,” he says and turns to me.
“What?” I ask.
“So…if we’re not going to my place, or to the make-out spot at the edge of town…”
I snort and shake my head. “Is sex all you think about?”
“I mean…” he shrugs with a smirk on his face. “Not all I think about, but it does come to mind when I’m with you.”
I snort again.
“Anyway…” he says. “Where am I driving to? Your girls are still watching us.”
I look through the windshield and the girls wave at us again.
Damn it.
I haven’t thought that far ahead. I just knew I couldn’t say no tonight. I haven’t actually put any brain power into figuring out what we’re actually doing on this date. I thought that was his job but clearly even that’s too much for Mr. Anti-Romance.
“I don’t know. Is there anywhere we can eat? This is a date, after all.”
I see him take a deep breath and bite his lip before he smiles and pulls out of my driveway.
“So, I know why I said yes. Why did you?” I ask him when we’re safely far away from the girls.
“Huh?”
“The date. Why did you agree to go on a date?” I start when I remember the disappointment in his eyes after I told him no sex. “Oh right. You wanted to hookup.”
He opens his mouth to protest then turns to me and grins and I respond by rolling my eyes.
“I’m just kidding. Well, not entirely.”
I glance back at him with a raised eyebrow.
“Your girls,” he says.
“They are stubborn.”
He chuckles. “That too. But it’s not that. It was how excited they were about it. I couldn’t disappoint them.”
“Really?” My shoulders drop and I turn to face him, but he keeps his eyes on the road. “Why?”
He shrugs.
“Other guys haven’t had a problem saying no to them.”
“‘Other guys’?” He side-eyes me.
I nod. “They have a bad habit.”
“To get you a date?”
“To get me a boyfriend.”
He bursts into laughter and even though I expected it, it still has the same effects on my insides as before and I can’t help but laugh along with him.
“In fact, it’s the only thing that brings them together at the moment. They’re at each other’s throats otherwise.”
“So, I imagine you date a lot, then.”
“No. Why?”
He raises his shoulders and sneaks a glance my way. “To keep the girls happy, of course.”
I give him what I hope is a look of disgust. “Of course not! Are you crazy? They don’t need to get their hopes up of getting a new dad anytime soon. I can’t imagine what that would do to their psyches.”
He bites his lips and nods.
“You’re right. I’m sorry. I wasn’t thinking.”
“It’s fine. It’s not like you committed a crime. Tonight at least.”
“You read the blog again, didn’t you?” He groans.
I pretend to zip my mouth shut and sink into my seat, leaving him to stew.
“I hate them. Whoever is behind it, I hate them. It’s like they’re determined to ruin me.”
That doesn’t sound fun. And to be honest, it only reinforces my idea that he’s the last person I should be seen with. But it’s too late to change my mind now, isn’t it?
I try to shake it out of my head but I keep making up headlines in my head. The kind I could see on the blog tomorrow morning.
By the time I manage to push those thoughts aside, he parks up across a bar and I have to get out of the car and be civil again.
“The Forbidden Maple?” I eye the sign and cast a glance his way.
“Yeah. It’s the best bar in town if I say so myself.”
“You mean you haven’t been kicked out of this one yet.”
“Hey!” he exclaims but he’s smiling so I know I haven’t offended him, which is a relief. Especially if we’re going to have to share a meal and spend the next hour together.
I study the black and white sign outside the bar until I realize the logo is a maple leaf upside down, which makes it look like a half apple.
“Why is it forbidden?” I ask him, all tease and sarcasm as he opens the front door for me.
“Because it’s a prohibition-style bar. And they do some sinfully good cocktails.”
“Okay now I’m intrigued.” I breathe in the smell of beer, sugar and alcohol and my mouth salivates at the promise of a good, stiff drink.
We take a seat at the bar and order from the cocktail menu when he turns to me and smiles. I divert my eyes from his and look down at his T-shirt, which is visible again now he’s taken his jacket off.
“You never told me. What’s this Anti-Valentine Club?”
He looks down at his shirt and pulls it tight so I can see the heart in the middle of a struck-through circle.
“It’s my club. I started it.”
“Oh. And what do you do? Do you get together in a circle jerk and hate on love every week?”
“Pretty much.” He winks at me and shoots at me with his finger gun and I can’t help but laugh.
Even if I want to take the guy seriously, he doesn’t let me. But then again, I’ve had enough serious shit in my life. Someone making me laugh isn’t the worst thing that could happen to me.
“I hope you use protection,” I say.
“Oh we do. It’s part of your subscription. Branded T-shirt, matches and condoms.”
“Matches?” I raise my eyebrow.
“Yeah. For when I light Valentine shit on fire.”
“So you are a bad boy.”
“I do my best.”
The bartender returns with our cocktails and the food menu. I take a moment to pick my meal before I turn my attention back to Hayworth.
“So what are you burning this week?” I ask.
“Why? Are you interested in joining my club?”
I shrug.
“That depends.”
“On what?”
“Do I have to take an oath?”
He slaps his hand on the table and with a chuckle says: “You do and it’s to hate love forever after.”
“Easy,” I reply and take a sip of my old-fashioned served in a teacup. It’s smoky and strong and sweet enough to appease my raging insides but it’s the company that hits the spot and puts me at ease.
I shouldn’t. I shouldn’t even be entertaining his bullshit, and yet, I can’t help but laugh and go along with everything.
“So you do hate love!” he says.
“Were you doubting me?”
He nods. “Of course. I mean, you did go to a speed-dating event.”
“Oh my God. Are you going to hold that against me forever?”
“Maybe. But I might need you to do things for me in order to forget it.”
His lips are concealed behind his glass but I can detect the smirk and the cheek behind it.
“What kinds of things?” I ask and can’t help but think of naughty, sexy things I could do to him or for him.
I bet he’d look good naked. I bet he’d look even better coming in my mouth.
Fuck!
Where did that come from?
I pull the elastic band around my wrist to return me to my senses but the sting only makes my cock harden in my pants and I have to swallow a groan in my teacup.
“Hm…” he says. “We can start with that third speed-dating event next week.”
I clear my throat and tap my chest for good measure before I turn to him. “Is that your way of asking me out on a second date, Mr. Hayworth?”
The way he snorts brings me back down to earth in record time.
“Me? A second date? No. I don’t even do regular dates. It’s too risky.”
“Risky? What’s risky about it?”
“It’s easy to think you’re catching feelings. And that’s the last thing I want. Me? I’m a hookup guy. That way there’s guaranteed no feelings involved.”
“No feelings? In sex? You must be doing it wrong.”
He chuckles. “No. Definitely not. I can show you if you like.”
Snap.
This time, the sting of the elastic band does wake me up a little. And it definitely sobers me up.
This guy is a player. He’s the last person on earth I should even entertain dating, or hooking up with.
“It’s okay. I believe you,” I say and turn to face the bar.
“Well, I’m here if you change your mind.”
“I’m okay.” I wave my hand in front of his face and turn to my cocktail.
It’s tempting and of course my cock throbs at the suggestion but I can’t. I can’t change my mind.
I need to change the subject. Yeah. That’s what I need to do.
“So, what do you do, Hayworth? For work, I mean.”
He takes a deep breath and licks his lips and I brace myself.
“You first.”
I deflate.
Of course. Nothing is easy with this guy, is it?
“Are you hiding from me?”
He laughs. “No. But mine is…complicated.”
Now I’m even more intrigued.
“Well, I’m a graphic designer. More specifically a book cover designer.”
“No way!” His eyes pop wide open as if he doesn’t believe me but then he does a little approving nod and smiles. “What kind of books do you design?”
“Romance, mainly.”
I don’t miss the way his face twists in disgust. It only lasts a second but I see it.
“Now it’s your turn. What do you do?”
He licks his lips again. He takes a sip of his cocktail. He clears his throat. Then he turns to me. “I’m a dating specialist.”
I almost burst out laughing but I choke it down by biting the insides of my cheeks and only when I know it’s safe do I speak again.
“A dating? Specialist? What does that even mean?”
He shrugs and a cocky smile crosses his face. “Well, it can mean a lot of things. But for me, it mainly means I get couples together and I split them apart.”
I narrow my eyes, staring at him. “Okay, you’ll have to walk me through that.”
He shifts in his seat and turns his chest toward me, facing me. “People get in touch with me when they want to get a guy, or girl. I meet with them and make sure to do everything in my power to get the other person jealous enough to ask them out.”
He must be kidding. He’s kidding right?
“That’s…very niche. I thought you didn’t believe in love or dating.”
“I don’t. All these clients prove is how fickle humans are about their romantic interests. And I make way more of my money by testing people in relationships and how faithful they are.”
I almost choke on my cocktail. Almost.
“You what?”
He nods as if he’s proud of it. As if he’s doing a service to humanity. And from what I understand of this guy, he probably thinks he does.
“Yeah. A lot of couples want to test their relationship. To test their guy is really the one and not a lying, cheating bastard. Enter me, with an offer they can’t refuse, and most don’t.”
“Because you’re so hot and sexy?” I snort.
“You said it.” He smirks but then his expression turns serious. “No. Because all humans, no matter how good they pretend to be, are lying, cheating bastards.”
Mark comes to mind.
He might not have cheated, but the lying and bastard parts are wildly accurate.
Maybe this guy really is doing a service to humanity.
“I would hope that’s not true.”
“Oh but it is.”
I sigh and turn to the bartender. I need more fuel. “Are you saying of all the couples you’ve ‘helped’ all of them have succumbed to your…charms?”
“Eighty-five percent have.”
“Wow,” is all I can say.
He nods with more satisfaction than that revelation requires but I don’t like it.
I thought I was a cynic, but this guy has made cynicism his full-time job. And what’s scarier, if his stats are right, is he’s proving himself and his ideology right.
No. This night was a mistake. This is the first and last time I go out with this guy. He’s immature, he’s a horndog and he doesn’t catch feelings. He’s also made it his job to split couples apart. He’s everything I can’t want. Not with two kids at home whose balance has been shaken one too many times already. They don’t need to put their trust in a guy like Hayworth only for him to betray it like their dad.
And I don’t need a guy like Hayworth after everything I’ve been through even though he’d be the ideal guy to be with if I didn’t have kids.
Who better to get over your abusive, toxic ex than a fun guy who takes nothing seriously and has only one thing on his mind?
Snap.
The pain of the elastic band on my skin gives me all the confidence and resolve I need.
I can’t be tempted.
If I want to hook up, I need to do it far, far away from here where anything or anyone I do won’t affect our life here. Or the sanctity of our home.
Hayworth is a good bad boy and he’s the last thing I need.