Chapter 22
Chapter Twenty-Two
"I'm fine. You didn't have to come over," Kaia told Lexie as she pulled two sparkling waters out of her fridge and handed her one.
"You didn't look fine when you came in from the parking lot."
"I was rattled," she admitted as they sat down on her couch together.
"They were shouting so many questions at a time.
And each one seemed worse and more personal than the last." She took a swig of water, feeling the cool slide down her parched throat.
“I’ve never been through anything like that before. "
"Did Jax say anything to the press?"
"Only that he was going to let Wren speak for herself."
"Nothing about himself or you?" Lexie ventured.
"No. That was it. I think he felt like he had to throw them a bone, but it didn't satisfy them at all. Fortunately, Josie, Ben, and Grayson came forward and pushed them all back so we could get inside."
"I'm glad. I wish I'd come out of my apartment earlier. I was on the phone. So, what's going on with you and Jax? Last night at the fireworks, you two looked like you were falling in love with each other."
"Last night was great. This morning, not so much. Wren arrived when I was still wearing Jax's bathrobe, and that was super awkward."
"She was here in the building?"
"Yes, she was. And my God, she is pretty. Like stunningly gorgeous, with her blonde hair, blue eyes, and sexy body."
Lexie grinned. "You don't sound jealous at all."
She made a face at her friend. "I'm just stating facts. I can see why she was the star of their group and why Jax felt like no one ever saw him, because her light is dazzling."
"I guess that’s why none of us recognized him. Maybe it would have clicked faster if he'd used his real name. I have heard their music. I think they were at the Country Music Awards last year. Anyway, getting back to this morning, what happened after Wren arrived?"
"I left as fast as I could. She asked if I was the reason Jax wasn't getting back to her. He said no, but that was all I heard before I took off."
"But you two were together now, so…"
"We had already planned to take Walter to meet his long-lost love, Reina."
"That's right. You mentioned that last night."
"Jax showed up in the parking lot just as I was about to leave. I hadn't heard from him since I'd made my speedy exit, which was hours earlier."
"Which made you angry," Lexie said knowingly.
"It did, but I didn't want to have tension in front of Walter.
This was a big moment for him. That part went really well.
Walter and Reina looked at each other like two people whose love had finally come back.
While they were talking, Jax and I took a walk, and he told me everything.
It's a long story of addiction, codependence, enabling, and making bad choices.
Jax did everything he could to protect Wren.
They met when they were teenagers. They both had sad childhoods, hers even more than his.
They had a bond that was really strong. They knew each other's wounds. "
"Were they in love with each other?"
"They had a one-night fling when they were teenagers after a night of drinking, but that was it. He told me they knew immediately that was a mistake. From then on, they were just bandmates and friends. But I know he still cares very much about her."
"Does that bother you?"
She thought for a moment. "It doesn’t. I understand their relationship now that he’s told me more about how they met and how much they each needed someone to care, someone to feel like family."
"What is bothering you then?"
"I don't know. Jax had good reasons for doing what he did. Wren was having a breakdown and he was scared for her. That's why he protected her."
"I don't know exactly what he did, but it sounds like his intentions came from a good place."
"He always told me his life was messy and complicated, and I blew right past that red flag."
"Because you like him, maybe you're even starting to love him," Lexie ventured.
"It's too fast for love," she said with a shake of her head.
"I don't know about that. When you find the right person, you know very quickly. What do you think Jax will do now? You said Wren came to see him. Does she want him back in the group? Is he going to leave?"
"She wants him back, but he refused. I guess that's why she went to the press. Maybe she felt she had to prove to him that she had changed, that she was willing to take responsibility."
"We should look up what she said."
"You can do that. I need a break."
"I get it. We can talk about something else. Tell me what happened with Walter and Reina."
"They had the most stirring moment of reconnection. It really touched me. Their love had gone missing for more than fifty years, but when they came back together, you could just feel it."
"That's amazing."
"They're both on their own now. They're free to explore now what they weren't able to do before. It's wonderful. And Walter is a changed man. He said he has a reason to get up in the morning now." She paused, thinking about their love story. "It was finally their time."
"It's too bad they had to wait so long to have it."
"I think they were happy in their marriages, in the families they built, but this love from their youth is now back, and it reminds them of who they used to be, who they still want to be."
"And they have you to thank for it. You made this happen, Kaia."
"Jax helped."
"Then you both made it happen. You gave those two a chance at love." Lexie gave her an appraising glance. "Are you and Jax going to give each other a chance to find that same happiness?"
"He wants that chance. I'm still trying to figure it out."
"I don't know exactly what happened in the past, but I've gotten to know him over the past few days, and I like him.
I like the two of you together. You're good for each other.
And I have not seen you look that happy with anyone since I've known you.
" Lexie got to her feet. "But you have to make that decision for yourself.
And if there's one thing I know about you, Kaia, you are not afraid to make the hard decisions. "
"When it comes to life and death on the job, I'm always focused, I never have doubts. Decisions come easy. But personal choices are much more difficult."
"I get it. But I still believe you'll make the right decision, and whatever it is, I'm here for you."
It was almost nine o'clock that night when Jax finally heard a knock on his door. The guitar he'd been working on flew to the ground as he jumped to his feet. He'd pretty much decided it was over with Kaia, but now his heart was hammering against his chest as he opened the door.
She'd changed into jeans and a T-shirt, her hair falling around her shoulders in flowing red waves. He drew a breath, soaking in the sight of her, wondering if this might be the last time they would be this close, because there was an expression in her gaze he couldn't read.
"Can I come in?" she asked.
"Of course," he said, realizing he'd been staring at her for too long.
She walked into his apartment but didn't head to the couch. She just stood there, and that didn't seem like a good sign.
"I wasn't sure you were going to want to talk again," he said when she remained silent.
"Now you know how I felt this morning when hours passed without a word from you."
"It's not a good feeling. Is that why you waited?"
"No. I wasn't trying to punish you. I had a lot to think about."
"Come to any conclusions?"
"Yes. I don't want this."
Her words burst the last bit of hope he had left. "Okay. I won't make it hard for you. I'll pack up. I'll move out. I'll be gone by morning."
She held up a hand, shaking her head. "That didn't come out right. That's not what I meant."
"It's not?"
"I don't want this tension between us. I don't want us to act like strangers. We spent two incredible nights together, and I don't like this weird, awkward distance that's now between us."
He gave her a wary look, still not sure he was hearing her right. "You've said what you don't want. What do you want?"
She gazed at him for a long time. Then she said, "I want you."
His breath caught in his chest, her words shocking him. "Really? I thought this was going in a different direction."
"I'm being honest with you, so you need to be honest with me, too, Jax."
"I will be," he promised.
"Then tell me what you want. If it's Wren, if it's the band, if it's your old life, if it's a new dream, I don't care; I just want to know the truth."
"The truth is that I want you, too. In whatever version of life happens next. And that version can be something we decide together."
Finally, she relaxed, the tension dissipating from her eyes. "Are you sure you've had enough time to think about it? Wren put herself in the fire today. She took responsibility for everything."
"You read her interview?"
"A few minutes ago. It took me that long to get up the nerve. But I needed to know what she'd said. And it surprised me. Have you read her statement?"
"No."
"Why not?"
"Because it doesn't matter what she said. I lived it. I don't need a recap, and her words won't change whatever I decide to do with my life. We've been tangled up together for too long. It was a great ride, at least some of the time, but it's over."
Kaia frowned. "I think you should read it, Jax.
You would be proud of the way she has taken responsibility, confessed her addictions, and exonerated you in everything, including the car crash.
She told everyone in the world that the only person who should be blamed for anything is herself.
And you are the best person she has ever known, and any hate directed at you is going to the wrong person. "
His gut tightened. "Well, I appreciate that.
And I'm glad she owned up. More for her than for me, honestly.
I think that's the only way she's going to be able to stay clean.
She can't hide anymore. The secrets were part of her addiction.
She never wanted anyone to know who she was; she was too embarrassed by where she came from. "
"And you understood that better than anyone."
"And let her get away with it for too long. I'm also done with secrets, with running away, with hiding. I'll talk to the press if I need to. But I don't care about them. I don't care about stories or rumors, or gossip. I just care about you, Kaia."
"I appreciate that. But I want to be clear about something. I know that you also care about Wren. And that's okay. You don't have to pretend otherwise. I understand your relationship. I'm not jealous. I'm not threatened. Wren is family to you, and you don't need to push her away because of me."
He tipped his head, happy that Wren wasn't going to come between them, and amazed at how compassionate Kaia was for others, even a woman she didn't know, a woman who had been rude to her earlier in the day.
"Thank you for saying that. But I want to be clear, too.
Wren is not my priority; you are. I want to see where we can go together.
I want to be with you. I want to get to know all your friends and for them to really get to know me.
You were right when you told me Ocean Shores would start to feel like a family. "
Finally, she smiled, and his heart swelled with relief.
"I'm so happy to hear that," she said. "It's what I wanted for you, Jax."
"I know. When you told Walter earlier today that you didn't want this day to be the end of his story, you wanted it to be the beginning; that's exactly how I feel about us.
I want us to have our story, separate from your story and my story.
I want to make memories together. I don't care about the past. I want the present and the future. And I want it with you."
She blinked away what appeared to be moisture in her eyes. "That was really sweet."
"I didn't mean to make you cry."
"I never cry," she said with the bravado he loved so much.
He grinned. "Just got something in your eye, huh?"
"Allergies," she lied. "So…can we start now on the happily ever after?"
"Absolutely. And I want you to know, Kaia, that no one is ever going to love you the way I do."
"I'm counting on that." She wrapped her arms around his neck and gave him the best kiss of his life.
The first of many…