Chapter 3
Avery
“How’s your psyche?” Stella asks. “Is it healed yet?”
“Oh, god.” I hide my face behind my hands. “You bitches with all your feelings and this incessant need to discuss them.”
“Who you calling a bitch, bitch?” Sienna grins at me. “Seriously, though, how are you feeling?”
I have to smile. They mean well, that much I know.
I take a sip of water. “Dr. Forbes is quite the smokeshow. No wonder you cougar-lovers had so many nice things to say about her.”
Stella shakes her head. “It’s infuriating how hard it is to have a straightforward conversation with you.”
“Which is why we wanted you to see her,” Sienna says. “Not because she’s hot. I never even thought about her in that way.”
“For real?” I ask.
Sienna sighs. “It’s excellent that you’re seeing her. You should learn not to always deflect like that. It stands in the way of genuine connection.”
“Oh, come on. We are so connected.” I know I’m being obnoxious, yet I reach out my hand to her.
Sienna swats it away. “If we are, then tell us how you feel.”
“How many times do I have to repeat myself? I don’t have to tell you how I feel to be connected to you.”
“Let’s leave her be,” Stella says. “And I guess you’re right, Dr. Forbes is easy to look at.” I love it when Stella sides with me and we can gang up on Sienna for a change. “Although Sienna is our one-and-only true cougar expert.”
“Jesus.” Sienna’s not ready to let it go yet—there’s not a hint of a smile on her face. “I went to see Nic after my dad died. How she looked didn’t even register with me.”
“Sorry,” I say sheepishly. It’s not an excuse, but I didn’t know Sienna when she was going through the worst of her grief after her dad’s sudden death.
“It’s fine. I was also falling madly in love with Justine at the time, so my eye didn’t wander to other cougars,” Sienna says.
“Besides,” Stella chimes in. “The woman is your therapist. How hot she is shouldn’t be a factor.”
“I find it hugely helpful,” I say, which isn’t just banter, but also kind of true.
“Isn’t it more helpful that she’s gay?” Sienna asks. “That she can truly relate to that?”
I pull up a shoulder. “It’s not like I can try it on with her, so that’s not really important to me.”
Sienna threatens to pummel me with a throw pillow.
“If Dr. Nic can’t save you, I don’t know who can,” Sienna says and I’m not sure if she’s joking or not.
“Save me from what?” I ask.
“From yourself, bitch,” Sienna says.
“Just because I gave some lame-ass guy a well-deserved shove,” I say, knowing full well that was just the catalyst.
“How about last week,” Stella says. “At Marcy’s thing. That hot influencer was flirting with you like her life depended on it and you…” She shakes her head in desperation. “You don’t flirt; you repel.”
“What the actual fuck?” What is she even talking about? “Why would I flirt back with some influencer?”
“Because she was hot and queer and totally into you,” Stella says matter-of-factly.
“I don’t want to be all over someone’s TikTok the next day,” I mumble.
“That’s not the point, though,” Stella says. “The point is you didn’t even give her a chance.”
“She wasn’t my type.”
“What is your type?”
An image of Dr. Nicola Forbes shoots through my head, but I wisely keep that to myself.
“I don’t know, but not her.”
“Maybe we should put together a file,” Sienna says. “Avery Hall’s Ideal Woman: Requirements and Red Flags.”
“With color-coded tabs,” Stella adds. “We’ll use pink for anyone who actually expresses feelings and orange for the ones who spend too much time on socials.”
“Oh, fuck off.” I roll my eyes. “You’re acting like I’m some broken object you need to fix.”
Stella shrugs. “We’re not trying to fix you. We’re just trying to make sure you don’t spend the rest of your life confusing repression for mystery.”
“I am mysterious,” I say. “It’s one of my most maddening qualities.”
“You said it,” Sienna mutters.
“Let’s talk about something other than me,” I say, hoping to steer the conversation elsewhere. One hour a week talking about my feelings is more than plenty.
“Kate wants another baby,” Stella says, rather out of the blue—but at least changing the topic swiftly. “She and Mimi get along like a house on fire and Mimi has four kids, so…”
“Do you want another baby?” Sienna, who is happily—and vocally—child-free, asks.
“Unbreak My Heart won’t keep going forever,” Stella replies. “And I’m not getting any younger, nor is Kate.”
“I’m not sensing an overly enthusiastic vibe here,” Sienna says.
“I have other considerations than Kate,” Stella says. “And my career is booming, so it’s a tough decision to put it on hold. We all know the expiration date of female actors in the biz and I’m not too far from it.”
“Look at Nora,” I chime in, just to say something.
I have little to contribute on the subject of having another child.
I’ve thought about it—every woman has at some point in her life—but I’ve never even had a relationship last longer than a few months, and I’ve always seen that as the writing on the wall for many other things.
Perhaps that’s something to discuss with Dr. Nic.
“Her career’s thriving and she’s what? Close to sixty now? ”
Stella bursts out laughing. “Nora will be fifty-five this year.” She winks at me. “But can you please repeat this when she’s in the room.”
I shrug off her comment. “Nora doesn’t seem like the type of vain actor who gets angry when you get her age wrong by a couple of years.”
“Nora doesn’t seem like a lot of things,” Stella just says, then lets that hang there. She knows Nora Levine—a genuinely mysterious person—well, having worked with her for years on their TV show Unbreak My Heart.
“But seriously,” Sienna says. “Are you considering it?”
“Of course, I’m considering it,” Stella says. “It’s what my wife wants more than anything.” A smile breaks on her face. “And I love my cute little Silas to the fucking moon and back.”
“Still,” Sienna says.
“Let’s say discussions are open, but…” Stella seems unable to wipe that smile off her face. “We’ll see. I’ll keep you posted on the state of my womb, bitches.” She snickers and it’s so infectious, Sienna and I snicker with her.
We hang out a little longer and all the while I try to remember this hot influencer that was supposedly flirting with me last week, but for the life of me, I can’t picture her.