Chapter 28
James
Ice-cold eyes.
Soft hair.
Red lips and a perfect ass.
I hated her. Who the fuck did she think she was?
“For god’s sake. Is June here?”
Will turned white when he got there and saw her in the middle of the crowd. She was talking with Tiffany. I knew Tiffany, and all this desire to spend time with June after last night meant only one thing.
She must’ve really enjoyed that kiss.
“James, why aren’t you listening to me?” Will called my name abruptly.
“Eh.”
We’d only been in that awful place for twenty minutes, but there wasn’t a sign of Jackson or Marvin.
“Did you know she was coming?” Will and his fucking questions.
“Blame Tiffany.” I groaned, looking back at a stranger staring at me.
“I can’t do it. What do I tell her?”
“Fucking nothing, Will. Ignore her,” I retorted curtly.
Then I grumbled, but not before glaring at them. The princess had some sort of sixth sense because she seemed to notice every time I looked at her. It was close, because she’d caught me right in the middle of staring at her like an idiot.
I wanted to go out and smoke, but Will couldn’t seem to find peace.
“She looks too pretty tonight. Do you see how everyone is looking at her?” he murmured.
“Uh, she still looks the same to me.”
Everyone turned to look at her, too, but she never even noticed.
“Will, enough,” I reprimanded him when I caught him staring at her again.
“Yeah, I know I shouldn’t.”
“Look, get her out of your head.
“It’s just that I’m drawn to her.”
Right.
“Bang another one, this the place is full of girls,” I spat, while the chick all over me kept asking me questions that I had no intention of answering.
“Get her out of my head, James? That’s easy for you to say.” Will smiled.
I do it easily because it’s easy.
“But still, who’s that dick talking to her?” I asked when I noticed a stranger approach her.
“I don’t know. I’m gonna find out.”
I shrugged, but I couldn’t get rid of the bad feeling forming in the pit of my stomach.
William had already disappeared into the crowd, so I hurried up and joined him.
“What the fuck are you doing? Do you want to scare her?” I stopped him before he could go farther.
At first he looked at me bewildered, then he composed himself and beckoned me.
I heard the girl I was dancing with whine. She was attractive, so sexy that she probably wasn’t used to being ditched in the middle of the dance floor.
“What is it, Will?”
“If hypothetically—” I recognized that look. It was the one he had when he had started to obsess over something. He could do that with races, with Ari, but not with her.
“No, Will.”
“Let’s say I want her back.”
I rolled my eyes and put an end to his pointless deliberations with a curt sentence.
“But you don’t want her.”
“Okay, but let’s say I do. What should I do, James?”
Was he really asking me? Someone he didn’t trust because he was afraid I could take her right before his eyes?
Sometimes, Will left me speechless, like he had the other night. Did he really have to kiss Ari, after throwing those fits of jealousy in front of me over the princess?
“Ignore her,” I retorted scornfully.
All this chatter with William had just reminded me that I needed alcohol.
“I already ignored her. Now what?”
“That’s not true,” I grumbled.
“Now what, James?” he demanded.
“And now fucking nothing. Will. It doesn’t seem to me like you’re capable of handling this situation. Maybe you don’t understand this, but she doesn’t seem like the type who wants to be anyone’s second choice.”
“What do you mean? Look, it can’t work between me and Ari—”
“And who would’ve told you that? Ari? Do you still believe what that pathological liar tells you?”
Finally, the girl I was dancing with emerged from the crowd with two overflowing glasses.
“Look, I don’t want to talk about Ari,” snarled Will. When he did talk about Ari, Will almost became more aggressive than Brian Hood. “And then?”
“And then, instead of bugging White like you have up until now, show her she can count on you. That you’re there when she needs you.”
Now I really hoped that William would quit asking me questions about how to regain the trust of that stupid princess who wasn’t even aware of the effect that she had on guys.
“Like? How can I make her understand?” he pressed, showing all his tenacity, or maybe insanity.
“You show her you’re always ready to protect her. That she’s your only priority.” I let my eyes wander undisturbed over the portion of her skin that that the dress left uncovered. First the breathtaking cleavage then the solid thighs.
Will stared at me.
“Oh, I see that you have a clear head, unlike me.” His tone oozed with suspicion.
“I’m just talking hypothetically,” I rushed to explain, before taking a gulp of my drink.
“So do I have to ask someone to bother her to then come to her rescue?”
“What? No. I didn’t say that. Besides, it doesn’t seem like she needs that, look at how they circle around her.” There were in fact different guys around her; some of them probably wanted to talk to her but she didn’t even realize it. She was such a dolt.
“And then?”
“The best part.” I sneered at her then him.
“What?”
The music was playing too loudly again, and Will didn’t seem to hear what I said.
“Nothing. Forget it,” I said.
James, tell me how you do it, Tiffany often asked me. Why does everyone end up loving you in the end? Tell me your secret.
The secret is that there is none, I’d answered, making her grimace.
But there was in fact a secret. It worked with the mild-mannered principal’s son, and with the biggest bitch in school.
The truth was I knew why they all wanted me around.
Not because they all loved me. I went from making them love me to making them hate me in a short amount of time, creating a whirlwind of extreme emotions in them.
They couldn’t do without me anymore, and that ended up being more necessary for me than drugs.
I didn’t learn to be this way; it came naturally to me.
Sometimes the spell broke, and some actually hated me past the point of no return.
So deep down it wasn’t a big advantage to be adored by everyone, just like it’d never been an advantage to change guys or girls every night.
My objective had always been one and the same: to rid myself of every frustration, fear, and insecurity.
Using people to feel less had become a habit.
But the thing nobody knew was that I preferred to do it with people I loved.
Because Tiffany and my classmates were my friends.
They’d talk to me afterward. They’d ask how I was, and we’d watch movies together or cuddle quietly.
“Will, instead of thinking about this bullshit why don’t you tell her to take a self-defense class?”
The alcohol was making my thoughts increasingly boring and unreasonable.
“You’re obsessed with self-defense, James,” he teased. “But she doesn’t need them. She has us.” He sounded convinced.
“Oh no? Do you really think the Austins would let up so easily?” I demanded. Will never took anything seriously, ever. He barely moved his shoulders, indicating that he really didn’t understand who we were dealing with.
“Look, do you think it’s a coincidence that he’s here?”
I pointed at Tom Austin, who’d just come in with some of his friends. I’d already noticed him a few minutes before, but I hadn’t realized who he was talking with.
Fuck, Tiffany.
The na?veté of that girl sometimes got on my nerves. How could she not have recognized him?
“Where are you going?” Will stared at me, confused at seeing me go up to Tiffany. She jumped.
“Jamie! What’s going on?”
“You said you were driving back. Why the fuck are you drinking?”
“I’m sharing this with June, chill, I’m not gonna get drunk,” she rushed to explain.
“What the fuck did you have?” I asked, watching her pupils get enormous.
“Nothing, because I have to drive your precious car.” She pointed at the glass she was holding between her hands. The music was loud, but I’d just heard a chuckle behind me, so I took Tiffany aside, away from the questionable group of people.
“Did that asshole ask you about me? Did he give this to you?” I asked, trying to take the glass away from her.
“No, no, no.” She stopped me with her hand. “James, stop, I’m not Amelia. That doesn’t work with me.”
“What doesn’t?”
“This whole song and dance where you care about me, you make me believe I’m special and screw the first girl you find in front of my eyes, like I meant nothing to you.”
She was running her mouth; it wasn’t like her to say things like that.
“Tiff, what the fuck are you talking about?”
“I told you, it doesn’t work with me. I’ve already turned off my emotions with you. Have you ever seen Euphoria?”
Okay, Tiffany was clearly trashed. But since she didn’t take anything from me, the question arose. “Are you sure you didn’t take anything?”
In response she gave me a kiss on the cheek.
“I wanna try to get that walking zombie to drink something,” she laughed, pointing at Brian Hood.
I watched Tiffany walk toward him. I saw Brian turn the drink down, while to my surprise, the princess accepted it and started taking small sips.
What was she doing there with him?
The lights were dim, but when I noticed him look at her lips more than he should, I turned around suddenly.
I wanted to break something.
I dug in my pockets irritably. I’d left my jacket on the couches, so I went to find it.
“What happened last night when you brought her home? Did June talk to you about me?”
Will went back to the fray. The more I told him to stop obsessing, the worse he got.
“Um, no, she was a little down, and I let her drive my car to distract her. Hand me my jacket, Will.”
“And quit spewing bullshit.” He laughed at my words, like he wanted to get the same reaction out of me, but when he understood that I actually wasn’t laughing, his expression changed. He pulled the jacket away. “Meaning? You let her drive your car? You? The one you don’t even let Marvin drive?”