Chapter 29
Chapter Twenty-Nine
The minute I get both Emmie and Wren in my car, Emmie reaches into her purse. “I got everyone condoms.”
I burst out laughing. “It’s a tennis team party. What exactly do you think is going to happen?”
“Never hurts to be prepared.” Emmie folds up a stack of three and hands it to Wren, but she waves her off. “I already got some.”
“What?” I stare in shock.
“Wilder and I…” She gives me a sheepish grin.
Emmie and I scream.
Wren just laughs, her cheeks flushing pink.
“Promise me he’s good to you,” I say, wagging my finger.
She bites her lip, her eyes twinkling in the dim dash lights. “He is.”
Emmie hands me the stack of condoms. “Speaking of promises, I hear a certain quarterback is making an appearance tonight.”
I start my car, a dark blue Volvo sedan Dad bought me after I finally passed my driving test. “And your point is?” I attempt a shrug but my tight shoulders feel too stiff.
I haven’t forgotten the promise William made me in his truck, sealed with blackberry kisses.
No surprise my best friend hasn’t forgotten it either.
“Don’t make the poor guy wait any longer,” Emmie says, her eyes softening.
Maybe she’s right….but the second I got the phone call from Dad, everything shifted.
I was racked with guilt, and then Mom humiliated me in front of everyone.
It felt like a wakeup call. I couldn’t be with William, not when my family needed me.
Not when Will needed to focus on football.
They won State this year, just like everyone predicted.
He got his full ride to Oregon, and Theo got a partial athletic scholarship to Western.
I park a block from the house and we tumble out of the car. It’s been snowing off and on for weeks, but the sun came out today and the roads are bare.
I link arms with my friends. “Remember no drinks from cups you didn’t pour. And we check in with each other.”
“And we leave before the chariot turns into a squash,” Emmie adds, narrowing her eyes at Wren. “Got that, Cinderella?”
“This is our first senior party,” she says with a groan. “If we’re the first to leave, it might be our last.”
A pang tightens in my gut because going to a party is something I promised Morgan we’d do together one day. I almost laugh out loud at how silly that seems now.
After the car accident, Dad enrolled her in an intensive therapy program she attends every morning.
Afternoons are spent doing online schoolwork.
Theo and I take turns helping her so Dad can be at the club.
It took a while to get our schedules figured out, with football and marching band and carving out a little bit of time for Boxcar, but it’s been almost six months and Morgan’s definitely better. Quieter, but stable.
The only thing that really lights her up is music, and spending time at a horse rescue run by one of the Hutton’s longtime friends, Gudrun Berg.
Dad even convinced Finn River High School to give Morgan credit for the work she does there, which has made the goal of graduating a little more tolerable.
Our open mic at Harker’s went really well.
Dad’s friend Steve was there with a talent scout he knows, and the two of them have been helping us book a couple more gigs.
It’s kind of exciting but I’m anxious about it too.
I love making music with Mo, but playing in clubs and bars puts a lot of temptation right in her face.
Plus she and Crosby still bicker, and I could do without my stage fright that has yet to get any easier.
But it’s not like I can quit Boxcar. Not when it’s the only thing keeping Morgan connected to us.
After the accident, Dad wanted to ship her off to one of those wilderness schools.
The kind where they make you march a hundred miles with just a bottle of water and bag of freeze-dried peas.
But we compromised on helping Gudrun with her ranch instead.
So if music keeps her here with us and gives her something to hope for, that’s what I’ll do.
We turn up the path that cuts through the middle of an expansive snowy yard, the big house lit from within. The music and din of conversation from inside the house grows louder with every step, or maybe it’s my heartbeat against my ribs.
I knock on the door, but I don’t think anyone can hear it, so I try the knob. A wall of sound and warmth blasts me as the door swings open. We step inside a room packed with so many people. Laughter and chatter and music crowd my ears.
“Ladies!” A guy I know from my physics class slips from the crowd, his arms wide. “Welcome!”
Another guy steps in next to him, his eyes drinking me in. Shane Riggs. I only know him because he’s such a cocky prick. “Keg’s in the kitchen,” he says, pointing as he talks. “Or help yourself to the cooler.”
“Thanks,” I chirp, then grab my friends’ hands and lead them toward the back of the room.
“Did you see that look he gave you?” Emmie says under his breath .
“Yeah. He’s a dick.” I beeline for the keg, though I’m only going to drink soda tonight. “Let’s get a drink, then I wanna dance.”
But Wilder comes in behind Wren as the guy at the keg hands her a red cup filled with beer, wrapping his arms around her and tugging her close. Wren squeals, then blushes crimson as he whispers something in her ear.
“I’ll be back,” she tells me as he practically drags her down the hallway.
“Okay then,” Emmie says with a laugh.
I’m twirling Emmie around the makeshift dance floor in the living room when we’re joined by Em’s sister Rochelle and a group of her tennis teammates, two guys and three girls.
We all jump around together, laughing and goofing off.
It feels good to melt into the music. Since Morgan’s accident, the only time I’ve put aside my worries is when I’m playing or singing.
Emmie and one of the tennis guys are hitting it off.
She’s giggling and he’s leaning in to talk just to her.
Then he spins her around. I try not to look for William.
I see him in the halls at school, those dark blue eyes frozen on mine for an instant before he passes, like he’s pissed.
I hate it, but what am I supposed to do?
“Having a good time?”
I spin around, irked.
Shane raises an eyebrow. His blonde hair is gelled in place and there’s a hard look in his eye I don’t like.
“Great time.” I spin away before he can follow up with one of his ridiculous pickup lines.
Emmie and I take a break to grab a handful of snacks and visit the bathroom. “You think Wren’s okay?” I ask her over the thumping music.
Em checks her phone. “She hasn’t texted.”
But she’s been gone for almost an hour. How long does it take to bang at a party? Though back in Will’s truck, we kissed for an hour and it felt like minutes.
“What’s with that Shane guy?” Emmie asks as we make our way back to the kitchen, dodging a couple making out against the wall, his hands under her shirt.
“Looking to get laid, no doubt.”
Emmie wrinkles her nose.
I lead her back to the dance floor, which has gotten rowdier and more crowded.
Our junior class president is slow dancing with the captain of the debate team, their lips locked on each other’s.
That same guy from the tennis team joins us, his attention focused on Emmie.
He’s kind of cute, with a lopsided smile and an easy laugh.
Just as a song ends, Emmie spins me too fast and I go flying, landing with a thud against someone’s chest.
“Sorry!” I cry out, but the guy puts his arms around me.
It’s fucking Shane. He groans in my ear. “I’m not.”
“Quit it!” I try to shove him but he just squeezes me tighter.
“Let’s go somewhere quiet, and you can scream all you want.” He’s already ushering me to the edge of the dance floor.
I slam my heel down on his foot, but he just laughs.
There’s a flash of movement in my peripheral vision. “Let her go!”
It’s William. With Theo right behind him.
“Fuck off, Hayes,” Shane says like he’s bored, still trying to shuffle me off.
William slams his fist into Shane’s back. He grunts in pain, his grip on me going slack. Theo wrenches me away from Shane who spins to William with an angry roar. Screams erupt from the crowd as fists start flying, the crunch and smack of fighting occluding the music and lively atmosphere.
“Stop!” I shout as Theo disappears back into the crowd where William has tackled Shane, his fists pounding into his face.
William’s going to kill him.
Theo grabs Will and yanks him off. “That’s enough, man!”
William struggles to be let free. The crowd closes in, and moments later, a path opens up to the door and Theo and Will drag Shane outside .
I race after them, feeling all eyes on me as I pass.
Outside, the brisk night air pricks my hot cheeks.
“You ever put your hands on her again, you’re fucking dead,” William says, shoving Shane down the path.
Shane spits blood into the snow. “What the fuck’s your problem?” He’s lisping thanks to the cut down the middle of his lip. “It’s not like she’s yours.” He nods toward me standing on the porch, rubbing my bare arms, his jaw set in a hard line.
William turns, the animalistic edge in his eyes melting back.
It’s like watching a lion lick his chops after a kill, defiant and sated.
He’s bleeding from a cut near his eye and his T-shirt is torn at the shoulder.
But there’s no denying the warmth pulsing through me as we stare at each other.
Goose bumps erupt on my skin. With William, I’m safe.
It’s how I always feel with him. His aggressive behavior might be alarming, but that he’s willing to do whatever it takes to protect me is kind of intense. And yeah, it’s also hot.
This is it , my heart says. This is the moment everything changes.
“Fucking hothead,” Shane calls over his shoulder, but nobody is looking at him.
Because Theo is standing between Will and me, his hands on his hips, watching us, a frown twisting his lips.
William walks toward me, his steps purposeful, like a predator stalking his prey. I could duck back into the house, hide, but my feet are rooted in place.
When Will climbs the steps, the pool of light from the windows illuminates the abrasions and cuts on his handsome face. His lip is split, and his left eye is swollen, his eyebrow pulpy with quickly congealing blood and split skin.
“Be with me, Charlotte.” His words come out desperate, tense.
His chest quivers and those dark eyes flash with hunger, and desire.
Not lust, but something deeper and scarier.
Something unmistakable. Something I feel inside me too.
It fills me with light and hope while also sending my stomach pitching and rolling like a boat caught in a storm .
“Hayes, what the fuck?” Theo says behind us. He’s moving toward us, the tap of his sneakers on the gritty path growing louder.
“Nothing’s the same,” I say, panic setting in because as powerful as this is, the moment is all wrong.
“I know.” William reaches for my hands. They’re bloody, knuckles split, but I take them, the warmth from his touch spreading through me. “But it doesn’t change how I feel.”
“Hayes!” Theo barks. “Get your fucking hands off my sister.”
I bristle at his words, but a surge of strength electrifies my spine. William’s choosing me. It’s scary and thrilling at the same time.
“Come on, Charlotte,” William says, squeezing my hands like he didn’t hear the threat in Theo’s tone. “Say that you want this. Say that it’s possible.”
Tears prick my eyes because how many times have I shut off that fucking song in anger, as if it’s mocking me?
Theo wrenches William’s shoulder, pulling him away.
“No!” I cry out as Theo grabs a fistful of William’s shirt. “Don’t hurt him!”
William doesn’t fight back, but his eyes are dangerously dark.
“Is this why you lost your shit in there?” Theo yells. “Because you’ve got a thing for my sister? I trusted you!”
Theo shoves him against the house, cracking his head on the wood.
“I don’t have a thing for her,” William replies in a hard tone, his eyes finding mine. “I care about her. I have for a long time.”
Theo snorts. “Un-fucking-believable.”
William straightens, his jaw set. “You need to beat the shit out of me, go ahead. But it won’t change how I feel.”
Theo punches him square in the gut. William crumples over Theo’s arm, panting in pain.
“Stop it!” I shout, and claw at Theo’s arm. “I don’t want either of you hurt!”
“I thought you were my friend,” Theo says, shoving Will against the wall again, his hand gripping Will’s neck .
William just stares him down. “I will never hurt her.”
“You can’t promise me that!”
I pound on Theo’s side. “Let. Him. Go!”
Theo steps back, breathing hard. “Was it always about her?” He glances at me, but it’s like he’s seeing through me. Or maybe he’s seeing a version of me that doesn’t fit with what he’s just learned.
“Theo, you’re not thinking clearly,” I grit out. Our family therapist’s calm words flood my mind. When we’re activated, our brains can’t think logically . “When you calm down, we’ll work this out.”
Theo spins away. “I don’t want to work it out.”
William slides his hand into mine as we watch Theo cross the street, his shoulders hunched.
"I’m sorry,” William says, gazing down at me, remorse in his eyes. “That didn’t…exactly go like I wanted it to.”
“You’re hurt,” I say, reaching up to stroke the side of his cheek.
“It’s fine.” He rubs his thumb across my knuckles.
Adrenaline ebbs hard inside me, making the world feel like it’s slowing down. “Did you mean all of those things?”
William draws me to his chest and wraps his arms around me. “Every word.”
I gaze up at him, emotions I’ve buried swirling to the surface. “I’ve missed you.”
He gives me a half smile, then leans down, brushing his lips across mine, sending a ripple of heat under my skin. “Does that mean you’re ready to quit fucking around and be my girlfriend?”
I laugh, but the emotions keep cracking open inside me, flooding my chest. “If you’re sure you want me.”
“Fuck yes, blackbird,” he says with a laugh, then winces. He brushes my hair behind my ears, his eyes so intensely blue I could get hopelessly lost in them. “Let me show you just how sure.”