Chapter 35 #2
The name brings a roaring buzz to my ears. Ari Pullman. I remember her warm smile and the halo of blonde curls that framed her impish face.
“Tenderhook,” I say, but my voice is breathy and too fast.
William’s eyes brighten. “You know it?”
My brain is leapfrogging ahead, trying to shut all the doors and windows that keep Creekside locked down tight. “I…met her. At a show we both played.” The words taste like cardboard in my mouth.
“What’s wrong?” William says, his sudden look of concern boring into me.
My lips part but no sound comes out. I cradle my coffee so that my hands have something to do besides twist in my napkin. “I just…haven’t thought about Ari in a long time.”
He breaks off a piece of toast but doesn’t eat it. “I looked her up. She disappeared in March of our freshman year of college…” His jaw flexes and he’s staring at his plate like it’s a hole in the floor.
I want to reach out for his hand, reassure him, but I can’t.
That year was a disaster. A part of me was relieved William wasn’t in my life that winter when the flashbacks started.
I could barely focus on my classes. The only thing that saved me was music, and Henrik.
One afternoon I broke down, and he was kind in a way I’ll never forget.
“I remember hearing about it from Dad,” I say, though I wasn’t in the most receptive headspace then, and the details are fuzzy.
“She was never found,” William says with a heavy sigh. “God, her family. They must be stuck in permanent hell.”
“I can’t imagine.” I gaze out the window.
“Ballard wants me to look into The Limelight’s records, see if I can find a common link between the girls who all played there.”
“What kind of link?”
He shrugs. “Ballard thinks whoever’s targeting these girls works in the music biz. Maybe a producer, a manager, a zealous fan. If his team can find the link, maybe they can stop the guy from doing it again. ”
“Good luck with those records. Dad’s not exactly the most organized.”
“Right.” He scoops up a bite of his eggs. “Ballard brought up Morgan.”
“Why?” I snap. “What did you tell him?”
Will’s eyes flash with hurt. “What do you mean? I didn’t tell him anything.”
I force the panic from my tone. Quit overreacting . “Sorry. I just…Morgan doesn’t need any more stress right now.”
“I understand. And I told Ballard that too.”
Unease flutters beneath my skin like little earthquakes. I take a slow sip of my coffee, trying to recalibrate. “What’s he want with Morgan?”
“Well, think about it…Dagney is dead, and Ari is still missing. I don’t know for sure about the others, but what if they’re dead or missing too? Morgan’s both worked at The Limelight and played there. What if she knows something that could help the investigation?”
My brain feels spongy, disorganized. “It’s not like Morgan survived a murder attempt though.”
William blows out a full breath, puffing his cheeks. “Ballard’s probably going to call you.”
I gulp my coffee too fast, and the hot liquid on my sore tooth makes me gasp. “Why?” I manage, setting down my coffee cup so fast, some of it spills over the rim. I jump up to grab a paper towel.
“You’re a part of that same network too, right?” Will says. “Maybe you can help them find the connection.”
My heart is beating too fast and a cold buzz is working up my chest. It’s a warning.
I blot the spilled coffee, not looking at William because my mind is spinning. A possible connection weaves through my thoughts, but it diffuses. Like trying to grasp at thin air or get to an itch that’s just out of reach.
Ari, Morgan, and I all played at Creekside. With Nic Salazar .
I spin away to put the paper towel in the trash, but I can’t escape the memory flickering to life… my necklace popping loose, the coda medallion clutched in Nic’s hand. I always thought he took it to torment me. But there’s an alternate explanation.
New ideas splinter off faster than I can hold onto them. Could this be about Nic? He hurt Morgan almost one year after he hurt me. I assumed that was the end.
But what if there were others? Like Ari and Dagney?
Did my silence enable him to continue hurting young women?
Dagney overdosed, but what if getting high was the only way to escape the pain of what he’d done to her?
I know that playbook from Morgan.
I told them. I’m sorry.
My god.
“Charlotte?”
I blink at the window over the sink. William’s standing behind me, a worried look in his eyes. “Sorry, what?”
He steps closer, the heat from his body radiating into my back. “You okay?”
I force down a swallow. “I’m fine.” It’s what I told myself in that hotel room. I’m fine, I’m fine, I’m fine.
But I’m not fine. I haven’t been fine since that night. Since Nic stole the best parts of me.
“It’s heavy stuff,” Will says with a sigh. “I’m sorry if it upset you.”
I try to give him a reassuring smile, but my lips feel frozen. “I should get going.”
The beat of silence behind me feels oppressive.
I glance at our reflection in the window again, then wish I hadn’t. His eyes shine with longing and the planes of his face are set in determination. He’s not hiding what he wants.
But I can’t give it to him. No matter how much I want it too.