Chapter 45
Chapter Forty-Five
Slogging through the forest takes every ounce of my concentration.
The pain surges, hot and tight, while at the same time, my teeth start to chatter from the cold and anxiety swiftly overtaking all rational thought.
I try to fight the growing doom, but my thoughts get darker and more cynical with each lurching step.
What if CJ hadn’t come back for me?
What if Linnea had been seriously injured?
What if I don’t make it?
What if I do, and my body can’t be fixed?
Once we find the road, the even surface is a welcome change, but it doesn’t stop me from vomiting onto the muddy gravel. The searing pain my leg makes my vision tunnel and my lungs judder. I start shivering and I can’t stop. My hands and feet feel numb, wooden.
Linnea lifts my arm over her shoulders. “Lean on me, Pop.”
“You’re hurt,” I bite out. “I’m the one who…should be carrying you.” Angry tears sting my eyes.
“You’ve carried me plenty.” Her firm, confident tone makes my vision blur and my chest feel too tight. “It’s my turn.”
I choke out a sob as my bottled-up emotions turn raw and ragged inside me. Maybe I’m a mess right now, but I’m so fucking proud of her. So grateful I’ve had the honor of being her dad. I need to tell her this. Before I can’t. Before it’s too late.
High beams and spinning red lights wash through the forest. A tunnel of light melting away the darkness, heading for us.
The woods start to spin. Gritting my teeth, I fight to stay present, focusing on the high beams illuminating the silver streaks of rain, but my feet grow heavier and my exhaustion is so thick, I might as well be dragging an anchor with every step.
The ambulance stops and there’s a lot of shouting and movement. I’m placed on a stretcher, the rain like cold needles on my face as I’m whisked into the back of the warm and very bright rig. William appears, his face tense while he unpacks supplies and barks out commands.
I don’t see Linnea or CJ, but I can hear them. And I can hear the little girl, Daisy.
When I saw her running from the farmhouse, I didn’t think. I sprinted to grab her. And if I hadn’t, would that bullet have hit her instead?
Where’s your sister? The one with you in the window?
She told me to be brave. She told me to run.
CJ climbs into the driver’s seat so Hutch can help William, their forms a blur beneath the bright lighting while they get to work, talking in rapid-fire acronyms I can’t make sense of.
William slices off my pants and rips open giant packages of gauze while Hutch starts an IV and pushes meds.
They bark numbers that I should recognize, but they whip past my fuzzy brain.
Will starts volleying with someone over the radio.
Hypovolemic shock. I’m not finding an exit wound. BP is dropping.
I try to stay awake, but the pain starts to dial back and I’m warming up.
Linnea is talking softly from somewhere beyond the blur of Will and Hutch. Her hand curls around mine. I do my best to grip it tight.
I slip in and out between the arrival at the hospital and the rush to the OR. Men and women in green scrubs, masks covering their faces, move back and forth, their eyes serious. I’m moved to a table, then the bright overhead light tunnels to black.
I’m in a big, open meadow, a quilt spread over the green grass.
Bags of picnic food sit ready for whenever we get hungry.
Fergie, our Irish setter mix who passed away years ago, is exploring with Bruneau, their tails wagging.
Linnie and CJ are plucking shiny rocks from the sandy creek bed, their jeans rolled up to their knees and their laughter carrying across the sunny meadow.
Sofie is looking for bugs nearby with Tanya, Zach is fishing with Curren, and Jesse and Skye are off exploring, their chatter blending with the rush of the creek.
Colton is sitting next to me, his eyes warm, peaceful. It’s really nice here.
I want to pull him close and reassure him. Instead, I smile. It’s even nicer now that you’re here.
Longing for this dream to last fills me with a painful fullness, like my heart is cracking from the swell of desire and the love that’s multiplying faster than I can contain it.
But there’s something missing. Or rather, someone.
Keo.
Where is she?
When I wake, groggy and with the hint of a headache tapping at the base of my skull, I’m propped up in a hospital bed.
A soft beeping and a rhythmic whoosh fill the silence, and an antiseptic smell tingles my nose.
My limbs feel heavy and breathing deep is too painful, but I’m warm.
That I can move my toes and fingers brings a relieved sigh to my lips.
“There you are.” Sofie slips her hand into mine, the contact sending a gentle wave of warmth through me.
I open my heavy lids just as Jesse steps into the room, carrying two tall paper cups. His blue eyes brighten. “Look who’s finally awake.”
“Linn’s going to kill you,” I say as he hands one of the cups to Sofie.
He laughs, his face brightening. “The cups are made from forty-percent recycled material, and the coffee beans are organically grown from a women-owned business in Nicaragua. I think she’ll give me a pass.”
“Where…” I have to rest for a moment “…is she?”
Sofie gives me a gentle smile. “A few floors down.” Her eyes fill with tears. “Mild concussion. Two broken ribs. Some cuts and abrasions.”
“But she’s okay,” Jesse interrupts. “I checked on her a bit ago. Maryanne and CJ and some big dude named Bear are with her.”
I squeeze Sofie’s hand, my gaze finding Jesse’s. “She was so brave.” The lump in my throat thickens.
“No surprise there,” Jesse says, his eyes shining.
Sofie wipes her cheeks and glares at me. “You both scared the shit out of me and I’m not over it.”
I can’t help but smile, but it cracks my dry lips. “CJ saved her.”
Jesse gives a soft huff. “Sounds like you all saved each other.”
A man in scrubs and a white coat steps into the room. He flashes me a confident smile. “Officer Whittaker.”
“Rowdy, please.” I offer my hand. The movement awakens the pain in my leg, but it’s tolerable thanks to whatever pain meds they’ve got dripping into my IV.
The doctor grasps my hand. “Doctor Greg Camden. How are you feeling?”
“Grateful.” The word comes out low and soft, like a sigh.
Dr. Camden nods, his expression warming for a split second before it sobers again. “The bullet lodged in your femur. The repair was…extensive. You also lost a lot of blood.”
“Permanent damage?” I have to force the words past my shaking lips.
Dr. Camden gives me an appraising glance, his eyes serious. “You’ll most likely walk with a limp. And the recovery won’t be much fun. You’re also in dire need of a hip replacement, but I think you already knew that.”
The bargain I made during our escape flashes through my mind.
“That joint is basically bone on bone.” Dr. Camden winces. “It must be excruciating.”
Sofie and Jesse exchange a glance.
“I understand.” I swallow the knot of apprehension. “How about…riding a horse, or…skiing.”
“One recovery win at a time, okay?” He gives me a reassuring nod, but the weight of uncertainty about my future is too powerful, and I look away.
The next time I open my eyes, Sofie and Jess are gone but CJ’s here.
“Hey, pardner,” I croak.
With a hard exhale, he offers his hand. The knuckles are covered in bandages, affirming my suspicion about how those two men ended up unconscious. “It’s good to see you, sir.”
I blink back the emotion clawing at my eyes. When our hands meet, I tug on him, wrapping my arm around his shoulders so I can pull him in close. “Thank you.”
He gives a startled huff. “What for?”
“Going after Linnie. Getting us out of that mess.”
He gives a low hum. “We make a pretty good team.”
“A great team.”
When I release him, his eyes are glassy. “Linnea’s going to be okay.” He sniffs and shuffles his feet. “They didn’t hurt her…like that.”
Relief softens the tension in my shoulders, and I release a silent sigh. “If you hadn’t gone after her. If you had hesitated like I did—”
“We both did what we had to do.”
CJ and I lock eyes, the silence turning charged. “She’s, um, going to need someone to take care of her for a while.”
When I don’t answer, he tucks a wild curl behind his ear and fixes me with an earnest gaze. “Looks like you might, too.”
I look away. Dr. Camden didn’t say I’ll never ride again, but he also didn’t offer a guarantee either. Or how and when a hip replacement fits into the plans. “Yeah. I’ve…got a long road ahead of me.”
He gives me a lopsided grin. “You won’t have to travel it alone.”
Our eyes meet again, and the things we’ve left unsaid shiver loose and melt away.
CJ lowers into the nearby chair. “Deputy Hayes and Sheriff Rumsey came by a little bit ago. They want to talk to you, but—” His gaze falls to where he’s caressing his rose tattoo.
“Wakefield and his disciples are dead. Some of the wives are are too. They think Wakefield ordered some kind of…sacrifice.”
“Dear God.” A wave of sorrow crests inside me. Nobody had to die last night.
CJ shakes his head. “I can’t really wrap my head around it.”
What happened to Luke and Annette’s plan to negotiate with Wakefield? “What about the children? And the others?”
“Safe.” Hope glimmers in his eyes. “Protective services is a little overwhelmed right now, but they’re getting help from the Crimes Against Children Unit and neighboring counties.”
Relief ebbs though me. Their journey to healing won’t be easy, but at least now it can begin.
“One of the federal agents was killed.” CJ’s heavy tone snaps my attention back into focus.
“What? Who?”
CJ grimaces. “A woman. I think her name is Annette.”
I close my eyes and force a breath in and slowly out. What in the hell happened? My heart goes out to Annette’s family, her team. To Luke. My god. The man has suffered enough hardship in his life, and now this?
CJ huffs a hard sigh at the window. “It’s madness.”
He’s right about that. “What about Sheriff Thomas?”
“He was arrested for the stuff he admitted to on those tapes. They also think he took bribes. I guess the state attorney’s office has opened an investigation. He’s going down.”
“That’s good news.”
We’re quiet for a moment. Outside the small window, dawn is breaking.
“How’s Daisy?” I ask.
A flicker of warmth returns to his eyes. “She’s okay. Reunited with her older sister and baby brother.”
“That’s great to hear.” My throat tightens again and I blink at the ceiling.
“Did you go back for her?” CJ asks.
“She came sprinting out of the house. I didn’t stop to think.”
He nods. “Was that bullet meant for her?”
“Maybe.” It happened so fast, and my body was running on pure adrenaline. “Do they have any family?”
“Yeah, an aunt and uncle in Arizona. Protective services is working on it, but…it’s a process.”
An unwelcome swell of longing tightens inside my chest. Such a courageous little girl. I want a good life for her. One filled with joy and wonder. And love—so much love. She deserves that.
I wonder if I’ll get a chance to say goodbye.
“Can you do me a favor?” Raw emotion clogs my throat.
“Anything, sir.”
“Did my phone make it in here?”
“Uh.” He steps to an area out of sight, behind the bed, and after a rustle of plastic, he returns, my phone in his hand. “Yep. Here.”
I’m surprised it’s in one piece.
He removes a pair of reading glasses from his coat pocket. “Plus twos, right?” He sets them on the bed with my phone. “Oh, and I brought you these.” He pulls out a dime store bag of butterscotch buttons, a smug grin tugging at his lips.
As much as I’d like to scowl at him, I’m too busy trying to keep my emotions in check. “Thanks, partner.”
“I’ll go check on Linnea.” CJ slips from the room.
With shaking fingers, I slide on the readers and pull up my contacts. I coax in several breaths to soothe my skipping heart before I make the call.