Chapter 1 #3
“Don’t know how to deal with it right now, yeah,” James said, desperately wanting to crack his knuckles but unable to do so since both of his hands were otherwise engaged. He settled for staring at his front door and gnawing on the side of his lip.
Leon was lucky enough to have a hand free, and he used it to cup James’ cheek and pull his lip out from between his teeth.
The move was familiar, and in any other setting, it would be sweet, caring, and verging on adorable.
Right now, however, it was very unhelpful for all the feelings swirling around James’ gut.
“You’re one of my main people, too,” Leon said, tipping James’ chin up so he had no choice but to take in Leon’s earnest expression. “Probably also one of four, or maybe five if I count both Hailey and her mom.”
James nodded, but that ball in his stomach wasn’t sure how it was feeling. Anxious, and uncertain, and right on the knife’s edge of hurt, but also maybe a little hopeful?
Which felt way scarier than every other feeling combined.
“Okay,” James said, but he pulled his face out of Leon’s hand and turned back towards the door. “I’m still sorry, though. I didn’t mean to have some kind of ‘talk’ on the sidewalk in front of my mom’s house.”
He should have just kept his mouth shut.
Leon stepped in front of him, so he was forced, yet again, to look up at him.
“You didn’t do anything wrong,” Leon said.
James bit the other side of his lip, and Leon hurried to add, “I’m just really fucking anxious because apparently you are one of the five most important people in my life, and I’m about to meet one of the four most important people in yours. ”
James freed one of his hands so he could grip the back of Leon’s neck and draw him down until they could tap foreheads. “I promise, she’s going to love you, because—” James almost said because he loved him, but it was way too early for that…right? “—you’re one of my top four.”
A ghost of a smirk danced over Leon’s lips. “Is that like your MySpace top eight but more exclusive?”
James pulled away with an exaggerated sigh. “God, Hailey’s right. We are old.”
That finally seemed to shake Leon out of the worst of his anxiety.
He chuckled softly and allowed James to lead him up the front steps.
When they reached the door, he noticed the curtains beside it flutter.
He had no doubt his mom had witnessed some, if not all, of their little moment on the sidewalk.
As far as he was concerned, that was fine—and maybe even a good thing.
It wouldn’t hurt for his mom to know how anxious Leon was.
She’d had years of practice with James’ anxiety, and she had always handled it with tenderness and care.
He opened the door and grinned to himself as his mom shuffled forward as if she was on her way to the door and hadn’t been standing there waiting.
“There you are! I was just beginning to worry James forgot how to get back to the house,” his mom said, reaching for James and giving him a particularly tight hug.
He’d gone out to meet Leon at his car over fifteen minutes before, so he wasn’t surprised his mom had been concerned.
Concerned enough to spy on them, if her hug was any indication.
“You must be Leon,” she said, turning to look Leon up and down.
He was wearing his leather jacket over one of the few non-black V-necks he owned.
It was a soft heather gray color that went really well with the red scarf Hailey had gotten him for Christmas.
His black jeans were devoid of holes, and James was almost positive he’d cleaned his combat boots, because they were suspiciously free of all the salt and dirt that usually covered James’ boots and shoes throughout the winter.
“I am. It’s lovely to meet you, ma’am,” Leon said, extending a hand.
James’ mom ignored this and shuffled straight into his chest for a hug.
Leon wrapped his arms cautiously around her back, his shoulders relaxing even farther as he settled into the hug.
James’ mom was a good head shorter than Leon, but James was very familiar with how all-encompassing her hugs could feel.
“Please, call me Ms. Bigley,” his mom said from inside the hug.
“Yes, ma—Ms. Bigley, ma’am,” Leon stuttered, his cheeks flushing as he glanced frantically at James.
“You’re fine,” James said, placing his hand on Leon’s shoulder as he walked past them to hang his coat up in the closet. “Can I take your jacket? When mom releases you?”
His mom huffed. “I’ll be done when it seems like Leon is done. I can tell when someone needs a nice long mom hug.”
She looked up at Leon and, seeming to confirm something on his face, returned to hugging him. Leon’s arms had slowly tightened around her, and as if given some sort of permission, his shoulders curled in, and his head ducked down until he was resting his head against hers.
James had told his mom only the bare minimum about Leon’s background. She knew his dad had died when he was a kid and that his mom had died when he was an adult. James had alluded to the fact that Leon’s relationship with his mom hadn’t been great and left it at that.
“Thank you, Ms. Bigley,” Leon murmured, and his mom finally released him. “It’s really good to meet you.”
“You as well, dear. Now come in. James picked up a whole platter of sandwiches from our favorite shop, which feels a bit ridiculous for only the three of us, but my partners, Howard and Linda, are coming over for dinner, so at least it saves me having to cook.”
Leon handed James his jacket before following after James’ mom as she made her slow way down the hall to the kitchen.
James took his time hanging it up, running his hand down the lining, which was still warm with Leon’s body heat.
He could hear his mom striking up a conversation with Leon about work, and he didn’t want to interrupt.
He placed his and Leon’s shoes at the bottom of the closet, then rearranged them, shifting his and his mom’s boots to the shoe rack until they were all lined up like neat little toy soldiers.
After straightening out their jackets one last time, he ran out of ways to stall and finally made his way into the kitchen.
Leon was retrieving silverware from the drawer, and he looked over at James with a sweet smile as his mom explained where the plates were.
“I’ll get them, Mom. And I’ve told you a thousand times, we don’t need silverware for sandwiches.”
“It’s always polite to fully set the table, hon,” his mom said, just like she always did.
James set about gathering plates and glasses while his mom continued asking Leon about work.
Leon did his best to explain what he did in IT department while James’ mom guided him on “proper” table setting.
When she pulled out the linen napkins, James raised both eyebrows at her.
She flapped her hand at him twice, first to shush him, and then to summon him to come get the napkins from her.
“That sounds like a very stable job for you, dear,” his mom said to Leon. “They’ll always need someone like you to fix what us old folk mess up on computers. At least once a week, James fixes something for me, and if he can’t fix it, I have to ask Howard, but–”
“His only solution is to turn it off and back on again,” James said, as he folded the final napkin and put it under one of the forks at the table.
“He’s much better with his phone than he is with computers,” his mom said. “He was going to get James all set up on one of those dating apps back in the fall, but then you two finally got your act in gear after so many years.”
“It hasn’t been years, Mom,” James said.
“It’s coming up on a year of us being friends, actually. Last March,” Leon said, smiling over at James.
His mom tutted as she walked over to the fridge to pull out the tray of sandwiches. “Oh yes, the conflict therapy.”
“Please, let me help with that,” Leon said, scrambling around the island to take the tray from her.
James was too busy trying to pick his jaw back up off the floor. “You…know that the conflict mediation was with Leon?”
“Of course, dear,” his mom said, immediately turning back to the fridge to try to pull out three different two-liter bottles of soda.
Leon gave James an exasperated look, and James rushed over to take two of the bottles from her.
“But I never told you my office rival was Leon.”
“You didn’t, but the way you talked about him then, the way you talked about him while you were friends, and the way you talk about him now aren’t much different,” she said, cracking open the Sprite and walking over to the table to begin filling her glass.
James stood frozen, holding both bottles in the air like a confused server. “How do I talk about him?”
“With longing,” she said, her eyes running over Leon before settling on James. “The same way he looks at you.”
Well…what the heck was he supposed to do with that?