Chapter Eleven #2
‘Anyway, the baby is healthy, but she’s also three weeks early, and my sister’s husband is still on a business trip.
She asked me if I can wait with her until he gets back.
’ Bri lowers her voice. ‘She’s so tired after the labour, and my goodness but babies seem to need a lot.
I told her that I could help.’ Her voice animates again.
‘The tour schedule is all organised. Between the two of you and Jed, I’m almost in the way!
I was thinking I can do my part remotely for the first few nights – even the introduction and the initial warm-up questions.
You’d just need to pop me on the computer. ’
The first two events are in the one place – a basic cabin at the edge of a forest.
‘Will there be enough reception to do that?’
‘Sure!’ says Bri. ‘There’s internet everywhere these days. Satellite.’
Declan’s forehead creases. I’m half expecting him to say something snarky, but he surprises me. ‘Is there no one else they can send?’ he asks, his voice unreadable.
‘Not without replacing me for the whole tour,’ says Bri, and I think I hear a waver in her voice. A note of uncertainty.
For a second, I think that Declan will insist anyway – I know from experience that he’s not the kind of person to hold back on the biting comments. But then he lets out a slow, steady exhale.
‘We’ll be fine,’ he says, moving his sunglasses and rubbing his eyes. He doesn’t look at me.
‘Thanks, Declan,’ says Bri, her voice soft.
Then she claps her hands, and the sound echoes down the phone.
‘So, the two of you will travel together, and Jed will take the van.’
‘ What? ’ Declan and I both look up at the same time. Our eyes catch and my stomach tumbles before I manage to look away.
Down the street, Yumi and Jed pause their movements to look at us.
‘It makes the most sense,’ says Bri, like she hasn’t heard the horror in Declan or my voice. ‘That way we can fit as many boxes as possible in the van.’
‘I’m happy to have a few boxes on the seat beside me,’ says Declan. His tone is even, but there’s a hint of desperation at the edges.
‘You were . . . I mean, we talked about you practising your speech and trying to get some rest on the way there,’ says Bri almost cautiously. ‘You won’t be able to do that if you’re driving the whole time. And Jed actually requested he drive by himself, so he’ll be fine.’
Declan falls silent beside me, and the phone goes silent too. Like Bri is holding her breath. Or maybe she just knows Declan well enough to give him space.
He glances up at me, and for a second I hate his stupid sunglasses, I hate the idea that my future rests in his hands. I am so damn sick of feeling like I don’t have control over what’s happening; of Declan being right about me stumbling. Which is the only way I can explain what happens next.
‘I’m fine with it,’ I say, and the words taste sour, but my heart skips in a little victory, because I’m fairly sure now I’m winning at being the grown-up in this situation. I might have to travel with Declan Archer, but at least I’m not the one who chickened out.
I could swear that Declan narrows his eyes behind his frames.
‘That’s fine,’ he says slowly, his voice tight. ‘Thanks, Bri.’
Bri claps again. ‘Perfect! You two are the best. You are going to have the best trip. And who knows what sort of bestseller might come out of this? I, for one, am looking forward to the dedication. Speaking of which, Declan, have you thought any more about—’
‘No,’ says Declan, cutting her off, his voice sharp for the first time this conversation. I look up at him, but he doesn’t meet my eyes.
‘No problem,’ says Bri brightly, and now I want so desperately to know what she was going to say, but there’s no way in hell I’m going to stoop to asking. ‘Speak soon!’
I slowly press the red button to end the call, and for a few seconds Declan and I just stand there, not looking at each other.
Which of course is when Yumi skips over.
‘Jed’s just finishing up,’ she says. Then she beams at Declan. ‘Great to see you again, Declan. I loved the book.’
‘Thanks,’ says Declan, lifting his gaze to smile briefly at her.
‘And did I overhear that the two of you are going to be travelling together?’ she asks. Her eyes slide to mine, and there’s a wicked smile at the edges of her mouth.
‘We are,’ says Declan curtly.
Before Declan can say more or I can kick Yumi in the shins to stop her from saying whatever terrifying thing is on her lips – probably one of her freaking internet comments – Jed marches over.
‘All packed,’ he says. ‘She’s a great little van, that one.’ He turns towards Declan, hand outstretched. ‘I’m Jed.’
‘Declan,’ says Declan. ‘Nice to meet you.’
Jed nods, then turns to me. ‘Still Jed,’ he says.
‘Clarrie,’ I tell him, ignoring Yumi, who is stifling a laugh.
Jed’s eyebrows draw together, and he studies me and Declan.
‘You two planning to behave yourselves?’ he says, and I have no idea what is happening, but I murmur some sort of agreement without looking at Declan.
Jed nods again. ‘Excellent. Let’s go meet the forest, then, shall we?’
Declan is driving first. I’d like to think it’s because he’s trying to be civil, but I did also overhear Yumi telling him that I was rubbish at driving in the city when I was thanking Jed for loading the boxes.
I leave him to get settled in the car while I run into the bookshop to get my bags.
It looks different somehow, and for the first time in a really long while I can’t hear the echo of my grandmother’s laughter.
My breath catches in my chest, and for a moment I just stand there, staring at the shop I know so well that it hurts.
What am I doing?
The question thrums through me, tugs at me as I make myself collect my things and then pick a book that I’ve been wanting to read from the shelf. After a beat of hesitation, I slide the copy of Talking to Trees out from under the counter as well.
‘Have you read it yet?’ Yumi says from the door, watching me with a grin on her face.
‘I haven’t had time,’ I tell her, shoving it to the bottom of my bag. ‘You didn’t have to tell him I was rubbish at driving in the city,’ I say, but without any real heat.
‘You are terrible at driving in the city,’ says Yumi. ‘I thought you might want to avoid it, especially with Mr Eyes sitting next to you, making you more nervous.’
‘Yeah, but you could’ve made up something cool,’ I say. ‘Like that I refuse to be seen driving anything but a Lamborghini around town.’
‘I’ll remember for next time,’ she says.
I take a breath, and Yumi walks closer, then wraps her arms round me. I rest my head against her shoulder.
‘Is this a terrible idea?’
I feel, rather than see her shake her head. ‘It’s going to be great,’ she says. ‘ You’re going to be great. You’re making online shippers’ dreams come true.’
‘Shippers?’
‘People who ship your relation ship ,’ said Yumi. ‘It’s a thing. You might be too old for the reference.’
I’ve generally avoided reading what people say online, though Yumi assures me that there are still quite a few active reddit threads about Declan and me, especially since it was announced that I’m going to be the bookseller on the tour.
I’m not entirely convinced they weren’t started by Bri, who seems more determined than anyone to make sure it’s a success.
‘What if I accidentally murder him?’ I ask, my voice muffled.
‘Isn’t your brother a lawyer?’ says Yumi.
‘Property law,’ I tell her. ‘It’s pretty different.’
‘Then stay away from sharp objects,’ says Yumi practically.
‘Take good care of the shop?’ I ask her.
‘I will take as good a care of the shop as you take of Declan Archer,’ she says solemnly.
It’s enough to squeeze a laugh out of me. I step back and pick up my bags, one of which contains a very large quantity of snacks. I can do this. I have to do this. ‘I’ll be back in two weeks,’ I tell her.
‘They will be the longest two weeks of my life,’ promises Yumi. ‘I’ll message you pictures whenever I get a brownie so you don’t feel like you’re missing out.’
She links an arm through mine and we walk to the door of the car together. Then she waits while I take another breath and climb in with my snack bag, peering over me to look at Declan.
‘Keep her away from sharp objects,’ she says.
Then she shuts the door, sealing Declan and I inside what now feels like a very small cab together.