Chapter 10
CLAY
I grin wide when Rex”s jaw drops as he stumbles into the grand hall of the Nantucket Whaling Museum. Natural light streams through the high windows, illuminating the ivory-colored whale skeleton that suspends from the ceiling like a giant chandelier.
“Holy mackerel!” Rex shouts, tilting his head back to take in the full height of the whale bones. He has never looked so small.
The air in the hall is slightly musty, but a faint scent of saltwater drifts through entrance doors, keeping things fresh. I read the plaque giving some of the history of the area. The rest of our group filter around the exhibition. A long canoe type boat with pairs of oars has grabbed Liam and Trina’s attention.
I squeeze Rex’s shoulder and point above his head. “The whale skeleton is 46 feet. Pretty impressive, huh?”
Rex only nods, still in awe of the enormous creature before him. He tiptoes underneath its ribcage, looking like he’s exploring inside a whale-shaped ship. His fingers stretch high and wriggle to reach a tooth.
An elderly man on guard clears his throat. “You can’t touch.”
Pam steps beside her son. “Yes, baby. Hands behind your back. Look and no touching.”
Rex whips his hands behind his back and pushes out his chest. This kid is adorable.
He turns to me, eyes wide. “Is this really how big whales are?”
“Yup.” I ruffle his hair. “Crazy big.”
Rex cranes his neck and stares at the skull. Its eye sockets are a little creepy. Despite its intimidating appearance, Rex remains fascinated and pesters me with a barrage of questions as we stroll around the skeleton. “Do whales ever get the hiccups? I bet they”re really loud.”
Before I can answer, he’s onto the next one. “Is it true a whale’s pop-off bubble is big enough to fit a car? I want to see that.”
“Rex.” Pam scolds from behind. “Lower your voice.”
I wipe the back of my hand across my mouth, holding back my smile. “Hey buddy, want to ride on my shoulders? You can get a better view.”
Rex reverses a few steps then does a run up and climbs my back like a monkey. I help his legs over my shoulders and he slaps his hand to my forehead and pulls himself upright, giving me whiplash.
His Nike shoes dig into my collarbones, but a bubble of laughter makes its way up my throat. Who knew I needed a five-year-old to show me how to lighten up and live in the moment?
Dalton slips his hand into Pams. “Looks like we’ve found ourselves the perfect babysitter.”
“A doctor would do a far better job than Liam and Trina. I wouldn’t be worried one bit.” Her eyes brighten. “Dalton, we could have a weekend getaway.”
I hold up a hand. “Steady on, guys.”
Liam punches my arm. “All part of the plan. Trina and I were terrible at babysitting so we wouldn’t be asked again. You came to the rescue that night, so ‘tag,’ you’re it.”
“He can hear you.” I go bug-eyed at Liam, but he just laughs.
As I watch my brother’s amusement at my expense, a brilliant idea pops into my head. It might just work. I face Pam. “I can’t do a whole weekend, but there’s a picnic I’m going to next week. Think Rex would like that?”
Pam blinks as if I’m offering a life supply of chocolate. “Are you sure?”
“Of course. Rex and I had a rocky start, but he’s not kicking me in the shins anymore. As long as I listen to his imaginative stories, he seems to respect me when I ask him to settle down.”
A deep line forms between Dalton’s brows. Doesn’t look like he believes me.
I’m sure Rex could behave for one day. I’ll show my bosses that I am a family man, and I can handle any kind of challenge. Kat, Miss Rulebook, will be by my side. How hard could it be?
Liam shakes his head. “Wait a minute. You’re not talking about the hospital staff picnic. The one where the big guns will be there?”
Rex drums his hands on my head, the rhythm getting faster and harder.
I pat his knee. “Buddy, take it easy up there.”
Rex strokes my hair, pushing strands back into place, what feels like a part in the middle.
I wink at Liam. “See, he listens to me.”
My brother crosses his arms tight against his chest. “You saw the playback of ‘Bride at First Sight”. Rex was literally bouncing off the walls of my apartment. It took the cleaner more than one attempt to clean the scuff marks.”
Pam touches her mouth and mumbles, “Yeah. Sorry about that. He does get excited in new surroundings.”
“The picnic will be outdoors. Perfect for kids to run around. He’ll be charming all the nurses and staff. There’ll be other children to play with too.”
Trina is giving small shakes to her head. No one seems to think I can handle Rex. Pam and Dalton are willing though. Maybe they’re desperate for a break.
“I’ve got this.” I tug on Rex’s leg. “Do you want to come to a picnic with me and Kat next week, little man?”
I can’t see him but the double kick to my chest as if he’s a cowboy tells me Rex wants to go.
“Mom, can I?”
Pam’s expression softens. “Sure. You can go with Uncle Clay.”
Uncle? I’m not officially an uncle. My brother is. Uncle Clay has a nice ring to it. That would work in my favor if Rex called me “uncle” at the picnic. A real family man. Engaged to Kat and a kid by my side. Hold up. I need to get Kat a ring. Would the board member’s wives notice if it’s a fake? They’d know a real diamond from a zirconia. Guess I’m going ring shopping. Wonder if Kat will want to come.
Rex bounces on the back of my neck, jarring me out of my thoughts. “Thanks, Mom. I’ll be good. I promise.”
“There you have it. From the mouth of babes.” I wink at Liam.
Trina is biting her lip and Liam drags a hand down his cheek, letting out a breath.
They have no faith in me. Just because they couldn’t handle a night with Rex, doesn’t mean that I can’t be a responsible, fun uncle. I work with kids. This is no sweat off my brow.
I clap my hands together with finality. “It’s a done deal. Rex is coming to the picnic and we’ll have a blast.”
Rex taps my head again, a little too hard for comfort. “Blast! Bang!” He makes some rocket noises.
Liam and Trina collapse into each other, laughing.
I roll my eyes. I’ll show them.
Best. Uncle. Ever.
KAT
What have I done? The thought of lying to all of Clay’s colleagues sits sour as bile in the back of my throat. Is it too late to back out? Can I shatter the dreams Clay has of becoming the head of pediatrics? I’ve dealt with enough hospitals to have seen the archaic but unspoken rules firsthand. They’re not fair, and that is the only thing keeping me from marching over to confront Clay, telling him the deal’s off.
I feel like I owe him for helping me with Danny. The fake proposal was a brilliant move, but now I’m second guessing everything. It’s apparently effective, as I’ve not seen Danny since that day.
Kicking sand, I make my way up the path toward the reception office. I’m supposed to help Marg at the front desk today, but all I really want to do is sit around and consider what I’ve gotten myself into with Clay.
“I’ve never seen such a sour face on such a beautiful day.” Marg’s voice snaps my head up.
She’s sitting on the front porch, a glass of ice water in her hand and Steve in the chair beside her. They both watch me, concern pulling their eyes and mouths down in puckered frowns. “What’s wrong, Kat?”
Would it be too dramatic to sigh and flop onto the steps like my life is over? Probably. Still, I’m tempted. Instead, I lean against the railing and cross my arms. “I’m supposed to be the person who follows all the rules.”
Aunt Marg tips her head to the side. “Is that so?”
“Yes.” I drop onto the step and tuck my knees to my chest. With my cheek resting on my knee, I stare up at them. I’ve always been able to talk to my aunt and uncle. They’re like a second set of parents. “I’m good at following the rules. It makes me good at my job. Things make sense that way. Diagnosis codes and test numbers go together. You can’t bill an MRI of the head based on a hangnail diagnosis.” It’s a crude but effective analogy.
“But we’re not talking about work, are we?” Uncle Steve gets right to the point. “This have anything to do with that young man? Clay?”
My chest tightens and I tug my knees closer. “I rushed into marriage with Danny without getting to know him first.”
“And you’re worried the same thing will happen here?” Marg’s eyebrows lift and she sips her water. “We heard about your engagement. Anything you’d like to share about that?”
“It’s all fake.” I close my eyes and give them the details they’ve missed since my last encounter with Danny. When I’m done, they both wear shocked expressions.
Steve recovers first and moves to sit one step above me. “There’s a difference in following the rules and getting in over your head. What happened with you and Danny was not your fault. He intentionally hid part of himself from you. A detrimental part of his personality that you have no control over. That is on Danny. I hope he gets the help he needs to manage his diagnosis.”
“And we both hope that you don’t allow those few months to distort your entire view on love.” Aunt Marg sets her glass aside and leans forward. “You are a bright, beautiful woman. I see why Danny and Clay have fallen for you.”
My cheeks heat and I scrub them over my bare knees. “Clay doesn’t think about me like that.” Our kiss says otherwise, but I can’t let myself think about that for too long.
“Oh, we all know that’s not true.” Marg chuckles to herself but her focus remains on me. “Here’s how I see it. You and Clay are both adults. You both know that this ‘engagement’ is fake.” She air quotes engagement but her eyes glitter with delight. “I don’t see any rule that you’re breaking.”
“But we’re pretending so that Clay has a better chance of getting the job.” I protest.
Marg puckers her lips and makes a raspberry sound. “Bunch of old farts sitting around deciding who’s more deserving of a job based on their marriage and not on the person’s skills.” She waves a hand, batting aside my objection. “Sounds like they need a good wake up call. Or a smack to the back of the head. I never did understand how things like that happened. And in a hospital of all places. That they’d let someone less deserving have a job because they have a family at home...” She trails off, her jaw snapping shut.
“Marg is right.” Uncle Steve pats my hands where they hold onto my calves. “I don’t approve of lying, even though some people might deserve it. But anyone who looks at you and Clay can see that there are genuine feelings between you.”
“I did not need to hear that.” Knowing they’ve likely seen me and Clay walking the beach together, I almost want to ask what they see between us. But I don’t need to. I’ve felt it every time we’re together. I’m comfortable with Clay in a way that I was never comfortable with Danny.
“You’re on Nantucket, dear.” Marg wiggles her eyebrows and fluffs her hair. “Why not let your hair down and live a little. Don’t let what happened with Danny ruin the rest of your life.”
“It’s not like I can forget what happened.” An unhealthy surge of anger tightens my hands into fists.
“Of course not.” Uncle Steve holds out his hand to Marg, and she slides down to sit beside him, resting her temple on his shoulder. “Learn from your mistakes so you don’t repeat them, but don’t let them rule you. You have done nothing wrong.”
Is that true? I’ve always felt bad about getting the annulment, even though I know it was for the best. When Danny became irrational and violent, I knew I had to get away from him. There’s a small part of me that wonders if I could have helped him. If I’d loved him more, would that have been enough to fix him?
“Stop that.” Aunt Marg eases away from Steve and pushes over to my side. Her arms wind around my shoulders and pull me close. “I see those thoughts spinning. You did what you had to do, Kat. Guilt is understandable too, but you are not responsible for Danny’s mental health.”
I’ve told myself that same thing time and again, but it feels different coming from Aunt Marg. She tightens her arms and kisses the top of my head. “We love you, kiddo. No matter what decisions you make, you’ll always be family. And we stick together.”
“Like glue in Ellie’s sneakers.” Steve grins and the reminder of a prank I once played on Ellie breaks the tension.
I laugh and hug Marg around the waist. “Thanks.”
“Anytime.” Aunt Marg rocks me side to side. “Now. You pull yourself up out of this glum mood and enjoy some good old Nantucket sun, sand, and water.”
The call of the beach is too much to resist. I pull free from her embrace and make my way down to the private beach behind the units. As each step sinks deeper into the sand, I make a promise to myself to stop dwelling on the past and things I can’t change and focus on my future. Aunt Marg is right. This place is meant to be enjoyed. It’s time I started living my life instead of hiding from it.