Chapter 3 #2
I shut the thought down instantly. Not only because I’m praying like hell it’s not true, but also to protect my sanity, because I’m ninety-nine percent sure Tate is a virgin, and if she’s going to allow someone to take her first, it sure as hell better not be Ethan fucking Ken doll White.
Chris grins at the scowl on my face. “Triggered much?” he asks, and I glare at him so hard, it’s a miracle he doesn’t spontaneously combust.
“Listen, last we spoke, you were determined to tell her how you felt,” Damon jumps in. “So, did you?”
All eyes turn to me as I sit there, jaw locked, my mind a dangerous place as a fictional montage of Tatum with Ethan in the sack flashes through my head like some fresh kind of torture.
Eventually, I set my coffee cup on the table in front of me and rest my elbows on my knees with a sigh, knowing they won’t let this drop until I’ve cleaved out my heart and placed it on a platter for them to dissect. It’s their schtick to overshare and offer solutions to the world’s problems.
“I went to her apartment Sunday night to tell her,” I say into the silence.
“Smart. Coming off a win on Saturday. You were pumped. Ready to win your girl. How did it go?” Damon asks.
I grind my teeth together before barely managing, “She told me she’s transferring to Michigan State next semester to be with him.”
Jace lets out a low whistle. West and Damon wince, while Chris hisses, “Shit.”
“Yeah. Shit,” I confirm.
“But you still told her, right? What did she say?” Damon says.
“Hell no, I didn’t tell her.” I huff. “What would be the point? So I can look like the pathetic asshole who waited too long to speak up?” I shake my head.
“I had my chance, and I blew it. I should’ve told her long ago.
If I would’ve stopped fucking denying it.
” I scrub my calloused palms over my face as I add, “You should’ve seen her face when she talked about him.
She was fucking glowing, going on and on about how she has everything she could ever want with me as her bestie and him as the perfect boyfriend. ”
My stomach hurts just thinking about it.
“Told you to use the Playbook,” Chris chimes in. “You know, it’s not too late if you want to change tactics.”
“No,” the four of us say at the same time.
“What do you have against it, huh?” he asks, glancing between the four of us. “It has a one-hundred-percent effectiveness rate.”
“You’re the only one who’s ever used it,” Damon points out.
“Thank you,” I say, motioning toward our QB.
“And . . .?” Chris asks.
Jace just blinks at him like he’s stupid before turning his attention to me. “Anyway . . . what are you going to do now? You can’t just let her leave without ever telling her how you feel.”
I shove a hand through my hair and tug at the roots. “You don’t think I know that?”
“So, what’s the problem?”
I sigh, wondering how I can explain it to them in a way they’ll understand. “What if I tell her, and she still leaves?”
There’s only one thing I can think of that would be worse than telling Tate how I feel and having her turn me down, and that’s if I tell her and our friendship falls apart.
Everyone falls silent, my words dropping like a rock into the void.
“I can’t lose her.” I work my jaw, muscles twitching with the pain the ripple of my words leave in their wake.
“Hey.” West nudges my knee with his own. “Hate to break it with you, brother, but you’re going to lose her either way.”
I hang my head staring at the floor beneath my feet, unable to breathe at the tightening in my chest.
“I’m with West,” Damon says. “Take it from us”?he motions toward Jace and Chris?“if she’s really serious about this dude and she moves for him, things between you are going to change either way.
Daily calls turn into weekly. Weekly calls turn into monthly, then they change to texts before they drop altogether.
Once either of you is in a committed relationship, your friendship will become a shell of what it once was.
And it has nothing to do with you. It’s just the way it works. ”
“You’re wrong,” I say, hating the tremor in my voice but hating that I know he’s right even more.
“Seriously, man,” Jace chimes in. “Do you really think one day Tatum is going to marry some other dude, all the while continuing your daily coffee dates, movie nights, and your constant FaceTiming? It’s just not realistic. No man would be cool with that, no matter how secure they are.”
Ouch. “Don’t sugarcoat it or anything,” I grumble.
“Sorry, brother, but the truth hurts.” Jace claps a hand over my shoulder.
At a loss, I turn my attention to West and tip my chin. “West, if you were me, what would you do?”
“You’re asking him?” Chris gawks. “He barely says two words to girls without stumbling all over himself.”
Ignoring this, I stare at West, a crease forming between his brows as his indigo gaze meets mine. “I disagree. Right now, she’s happy, and if you mess with that, she might resent you.”
“So, he should do nothing?” Chris practically yells.
“No,” West answers calmly, “But if you truly love her?”
“I do.”
“And you think you’re the one for her?”
“I am.” No one knows Tate’s heart like I do.
“Then you wait it out,” West says, his tone firm.
“If you really love her, then interfering in any way right now would be selfish. It’ll be because you can’t stand to see her with someone else, not necessarily because it’s what’s in her best interest. All she’ll see is that when she’s finally happy, you’re trying to sabotage it. ”
“But Brandon is in her best interest,” Chris argues, clearly hating the idea.
“She doesn’t know that yet.” West shakes his head.
“But she could know that if this chickenshit would just tell her already,” Chris points out.
“It’s too late.” West shrugs, and when Chris starts to argue again, Jace stops him.
“You know, I think he’s right,” he chimes in.
“He is?” Chris asks, eyes wider than his coffee cup.
Jace nods. “I had this friend in high school who was totally in love with his best friend, but he waited fucking forever to tell her. Then, right when she started having feelings for someone else, he decided it was the time. Let’s just say, it didn’t end well.
She still chose the other dude, and he was in a really bad way. ”
Chris scoffs, and by the look on his face, he knows exactly who Jace is talking about. “Graham and Brandon are not even comparable.”
Jace arches a brow. “No?”
“No,” Chris shoots back, then waves a hand toward my face. “This is Brandon we’re talking about here. Our Brandon.”
When Jace just stares, Chris growls in frustration and reaches out, cupping my face in his hands.
“I mean, look at this pretty face. His skin is as smooth as a baby’s ass.
” I wince, curling my lip as Chris continues, impervious.
“Could you say no to this? Hell no! Those piercing blue eyes. That crooked smile. This square jaw.” He turns my face, angling it for the boys while I swat at him.
“And his forearms.” He lifts one arm, running his hand down the length of it.
“You know how much girls like some good forearm porn, and his are X-rated.”
I wrench my arm and face back, finally breaking free of his hold on me as I shiver and scoot further away from him. “Why do I feel violated right now?”
“If you’re done fondling our friend,” Damon starts, “let’s hear what he has to say. Brandon?”
“I agree with West.” I flop back into my chair with a sigh. “As much as I hate to admit it, waiting it out is my best option.”
I close my eyes and picture Tate?hair darker than an oil slick, huge cornflower-blue eyes, dimpled smile?and my heart fucking hurts.
“Tate trusts me.” I fight to keep my voice steady as I blink my eyes open. “And as much as it kills me, I can’t fuck with her happiness. Not now. Not when she’s been waiting for this?for a chance at love?for so long,” I say, nearly choking over the words.
West nods, offering me a soft smile. “And when she finally sees he’s not the one, you’ll be there to catch her when she falls.”
Each one of the guys falls silent with the heavy weight of their eyes on me, probably wondering how long it will be until I jump off the proverbial bridge.
“Um, just for the record,” Chris raises a hand, “I think this is a terrible idea.”