Grace
DECEMBER, YEAR 4
Dr. Chen’s Holiday Extravaganza as a fourth-year resident will be a true party. We have nowhere to be. No pagers. The lower levels are on call. None of us work tomorrow.
Needless to say, I’ve got my red dress on tonight.
When I step out of our bedroom, Julian stands from the couch and groans. “The red dress? You’re killin’ me, Rose.”
I smile. “You don’t think I look pretty, Julian?”
His dark eyes flash, and he sweeps a predatory look down my body. “You know where I like that dress best, .”
I grab my coat from the closet. “On the floor by our bed?”
“Mmm-hmm.” He grabs my waist from behind before I can don the coat, then kisses my neck. “Interested?”
“Nope. We’re late.”
He releases me with a sigh. “And that is why you’re killing me.”
I turn and tap the tip of his nose with one finger. “I think you’ll survive.”
While he flips the lights, I spritz one more spray of glitter into my hair, and we step outside. The small house we rent isn’t far from Chen’s place, and the drive barely gives us enough time to argue over the playlist, but Julian ultimately relents to my demands.
The party jitters have grabbed hold, and I leap out of the truck as soon as he parks, hurrying toward the house. Four years hasn’t done much to quell the anxiety that tightens my chest before each social gathering. It’s not like these people bite.
Much.
But at least the rumors about me finally died down. The gossip task force Chen created—or Rumor Wranglers as we like to call ourselves—initiated educational exercises for the new resident orientation activities each year. It’s helped to set clear expectations that gossip isn’t acceptable. It encourages open communication between residents and attendings. It’s not perfect, and gossip still exists, but I like to believe we’ve had a positive impact on the culture of this hospital. I will leave this place better than when I found it.
Turns out, I didn’t need Alesha, Julian or even Steven Lang-ston to save me. I just needed to save myself—by becoming the leader of a well-structured and aggressively researched task force, one that warms my overly organized and color-coded heart.
I made those rumors my bitch.
As I reach for Chen’s front door, Julian grips my wrist and spins me into his arms. His lips find mine and he kisses me breathless.
“What was that?” I ask when he releases me.
Tone innocent, Julian lifts a shoulder. “A kiss.” He reaches for the door.
I snort. Boy is up to something…
“They’re here!” Alesha shouts when we enter the packed house. She bulldozes her way through the crowd to hug me.
Her husband isn’t far behind. He shakes Julian’s hand before kissing my cheek. “You look lovely as always, Dr. Rose.”
The guy is nice, I’ll give him that, but we aren’t close.
Alesha grabs my arm before I can respond. “Drinks!”
Behind me, Julian falls into conversation with Steve. They remain by the door. Alesha drags me to the crowded kitchen, where Kai holds a glass of red wine for me.
I take a sip. “Where’s Raven?”
Someone taps my shoulder.
I turn and smile. “Raven!”
She envelops me in a hug. “Last holiday party all together.”
Squeezing her tighter, I laugh. “We’re almost done!”
We release each other. She hugs Kai, then Alesha. “I’m gonna miss you guys so much.”
While Alesha plans to become faculty at TUMC to stay close to Steve, Raven and Kai have chosen jobs farther away—Kai in Colorado and Raven in upstate New York.
Julian and I… Well, we haven’t quite decided our futures.
“Should we get a picture of the grads?” Dr. Chen enters our group and holds up his iPhone.
“Yes!” Alesha goes to her tiptoes. “Juju!”
She leads us to a quieter area of the house. Julian joins us and the five of us stand shoulder to shoulder so Steve and Dr. Chen can snap a few photos.
Afterward, Julian kisses my cheek. “Have some fun, Sapphire.”
“Don’t I always?”
He winks before slipping away to join the annual poker game with Chen and Maxwell.
“Has he decided what he wants?” Alesha asks once he’s out of earshot.
Her hair is laced with red and green tonight and she wears a flowy black dress. The two of us never quite recovered from the fallout—an element of trust is irreparably broken—but she’s proven her loyalty time and again.
We’re friends.
Not best friends.
But friends.
I shake my head. “The contracts are sitting on our kitchen table. He won’t tell me which one he wants to sign.”
She tips her glass toward me. “California or Florida. Quite the decision.”
Kai sticks his head between us. “Don’t forget about that private practice in Austin that wants them.”
Chuckling, I sip my wine. Julian and I decided to search for jobs together. We have offers near my family and his, but we also interviewed between them just in case. He says he wants to go where I’ll be happy. I say I want to go wherever he chooses.
Two months and we’ve reached no decision. With anyone else, I’d be worried about cold feet, but the man is as doting and romantic as ever. He loves me. I feel it deep in my bones.
“We’ll figure it out eventually,” I say.
Raven pats my shoulder. “Of course you will. Take your time. It’s an important decision.”
We meander back toward the crowded kitchen. The younger residents are clustered into groups, chatting and laughing. Interspersed throughout the crowd are others—Levine rosy-cheeked near the sink, Dr. K laughing with his wife, Hoffman complaining about the food, Narayan unsmiling in the corner.
Joy overtakes me, an illogical fondness for everyone in the room, even the ones I don’t like.
“You’ll miss it, won’t you?” Alesha asks.
I nod. “Bittersweet memories.”
She hugs me tight. “Been a crazy four years, but it wouldn’t have been the same without you.”
You either, unfortunately.
Kai leaps on my back so I’m sandwiched between them. “My girls!”
We laugh and reluctantly separate. I head toward a group of second-years to chat. When Julian joins my side in the dining room an hour later, he wears a satisfied smile.
I kiss his cheek. “Did you win?”
“Nope.” He pulls me closer and lifts my chin.
“Then what’s that smile about?”
His grin grows crooked. “Did you know you’re sparkling again?”
I scowl. He’s always pestering me about the glitter. “I like sparkles, Julian.”
He pecks a quick kiss on my mouth. “I know.”
Two second-year women beside us squeal. “Aww!”
Still wrapped in each other’s arms, we turn toward them.
“You guys are straight up relationship goals,” one says—the woman who called pregnancy the most common STD in her interview.
I let out an awkward laugh.
The other nods. “Please say I can come to your wedding.”
Julian snorts. “Sure. Come on.” He looks at me. “Did you set a date yet?”
“Um.” I wiggle my bare left hand in his face, eyes wide.
“Oh right. Poor y.”
I laugh. “Why must you abuse me so?”
His head dips closer and he whispers, “Let’s go home, and I’ll make it up to you.”
A thrill flutters through my stomach as his lips brush my ear. His hand traces my waist before he backs away. I’m distracted while we make our goodbyes, my gaze straying back to Julian again and again. Carefree, he laughs with Kai and shakes Maxwell’s hand.
Back in the truck, Julian capitulates to my music demands again, and a growing intuition wakes in my mind. “What’s going on?”
Streetlights flash over his face. “What do you mean?”
I narrow my eyes. “Something’s up.”
Chuckling, he shakes his head. “Nothing’s up.”
My Christmas red nails drum on the center console, and I stare at his profile. A suspicious creature lurking inside pokes her head out and squints at him.
What are you up to, Santini?
He takes my hand in his and we ride the rest of the way in silence.
At home, the truck rolls to a stop on our deserted neighborhood street. I slip out and head toward the house while he locks up. My phone buzzes in my bra on my way to the door. I pull it out and chuckle at the classic text from Julian: Found this. Made me think of you.
I anticipate an unflattering photo he captured at the party, but Face ID unlocks my phone, and the attached picture pops up. In Julian’s wildly sexy hand sits a black velvet box filled with a rose gold princess cut engagement ring.
My heart thumps as my steps slow and I stare, unblinking, at that picture. He took it outdoors during the day, so sunlight strikes the diamond and casts rainbows through the stone.
Skin prickling, I spin in place, expecting to face him, but he’s not standing behind me.
He’s down on one knee.
Julian Santini gazes up at me, one hand supporting his opposite elbow so his fingers rest over his cheek. A diamond ring is looped around his pinky. The no-smile is firmly in place.
“So.” He taps a finger against his cheekbone. “I was at the jewelry store the other day for no particular reason. I passed by a glass case full of sparkly objects, and I thought to myself, hey, I know a girl who really likes sparkly things.”
Nerves alight, a tiny laugh escapes me. “Julian—”
He clears his throat meaningfully, the no-smile mutating into a real smile. “I’m telling a story, . It’s rude to interrupt.”
“All right. Fine. Continue.” I clasp my hands before me, barely resisting the urge to swipe that ring off his finger and put it on mine. My blood flitters through my veins, tingles spreading.
He’s proposing.
This wonderful man wants to marry me.
“Okay. Like I was saying, this girl really likes sparkly objects, and I really like this girl, so I was hoping that if I bought her one that was really, really sparkly, she might want to wear it for me.”
I grin. “Sound logic, Dr. Santini.”
His eyes flash. “Oh, but there’s more to it.”
“I thought there might be.” I step closer to him.
“See, if she chooses to wear the sparkly thing, then she has to promise she won’t take it off.” He slips the diamond off his pinky and holds it between his thumb and forefinger, lifting it toward me.
My smile is uncontainable. “Ever? What if she’s doing dishes, or gains weight, or is performing surgery?”
He shakes his head, laughing. “ Metaphorically . See, this is me promising forever. Wearing it is her promise to be mine.”
Close enough to touch him, I draw one finger down the sharp line of his jaw. “That seems like a fair trade.”
“I love you, .”
“I love you too, Julian.”
He looks at the diamond in his hand. “Before you, everything was just…quiet. Then you came along and suddenly there was music. Like…a love song. The kind you want to listen to over and over. It’s stuck on repeat in my head and synced to your heartbeat.”
My breath catches. God, could he be any sweeter?
His dark gaze lifts, starlight sparkling in his eyes. “It’s become the rhythm of my life. I’d be completely lost without you, so I’d really like it if you wanted to wear this, .”
My voice drops to a whisper as I say the stupidest thing on earth. “Okay.”
Okay?
Okay?!
He says you’re the rhythm of his life and you say okay ?
How dare you?
He takes my hand and hovers the ring over the correct finger. “Marry me?”
I nod. “Of course. Yes. Always yes.”
That’s better.
The ring slides on my finger like it belongs there, and he stands. His lips catch mine as he pulls me flush against his body, and my back arches. Arms wrapped about me, Julian squeezes tight. My hands sink into his soft hair.
His lips trail kisses over my cheek until he reaches my ear. “Can I take off the dress now?”
“Yes, please.”
We stumble toward the locked front door, still kissing, and my back slams into the wood. Instead of reaching for the key, his hand finds my bare leg and sneaks beneath my dress, fingers fanning over the edge of the lace beneath. My entire body thrums at his touch. His mouth drops to my neck.
My eyes snap open. I’m female, newly engaged and adore all things sparkly. I must seize the opportunity to lift my left hand and study the ring.
Squee!
Perfection.
How does this man know me so well?
“Unlock the door, ,” he murmurs against my neck. “Unless you want to give the neighbors a show.”
“I have one request first.”
A questioning rumble escapes his throat. His finger hooks around the thin fabric.
“Can you please decide where we’re going to live next year? Your sister won’t stop texting me.”
His fingers pause beneath my dress. “I really don’t want to talk about my sister right now.”
My hands slide around his torso. “You’re driving your mom crazy, Julian.”
“Ugh.” He backs away to stare down into my face. “Don’t—why are you mentioning my mom now ?”
I giggle. “Pick a place.”
“I don’t care where we go, . I just want to be with you.”
It’s like he lit a candle inside my chest, slowly melting the organ into a puddle of heart-eye emojis. “Really?”
“ Yes . I don’t know how many times I have to tell you that. You are home. You’re all I need. Wherever you are, that’s where I want to be.”
If someone asked me right this moment, what is happiness? I could answer with an absolute truth: happiness is the man I adore telling me I’m all he needs. How does he not realize I’m getting the better end of this deal?
My lips touch his. “I love you so much.” I pull the house key from my bra and unlock the door. My hand grips his, and I drag him inside, heading straight for our bedroom. Halfway, I turn and grasp his belt loops, walking backward. “I’d do anything for you. Did you know that? How’s it feel to have that kind of power over me?”
His head tilts, gaze predatory. “Feels pretty good, if I’m being honest.”
Electricity shoots through my whole body and the horny hag in my mind wakes, reminding me I’m empty and he always feels so good . I pause in the doorway to our bedroom. “What will you do with that power?”
He pulls his bottom lip between his teeth, a quirk at the edge of his mouth promising indecent and wonderful things. “I have a few ideas.” His knuckles trail down my cheek. “You want to see?”
* * * * *