THE DEAN MACHINE
DEAN
They’re acting weird, right?
ALLIE
Who?
DEAN
G and Logan and their respective clans. Something’s up. They’ve barely texted me this week.
ALLIE
Just because they’re not texting you doesn’t mean something’s up. Contrary to popular Dean belief, the world doesn’t revolve around you, sweetie.
DEAN
Beau—back me up. Blake and the twins have been quiet, right?
BEAU
I don’t know. I haven’t noticed.
IVY
Leave him alone, Daddy. He’s sad.
ALLIE
Aw honey. AJ’s still not talking to you?
KATE
LMAO AJ’s never talking to him again. Not after what he did.
ALLIE
Maybe don’t laugh at your brother’s misery, Katherine?
KATE
Maybe don’t bang your best friend’s girlfriend?
DEAN
You’re fifteen. Don’t use the word bang. Ivy—weigh in?
IVY
Not until you change the name of this group chat.
DEAN DI LAURENTIS CHANGED THE NAME OF THE GROUP CHAT TO THE BEST-LOOKING FAMILY EVER.
IVY
Better.