Chapter 18
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
JACE
Willow’s thigh is pressed against mine and the searing heat of her close proximity has my body feeling like it’s about to combust. And dare I say, I want to burn with this desire.
“This is the one,” Willow says, her voice soft, filling the silence that had plagued this drive. Her upper arm brushes against mine as she points to the left.
My breath catches in my throat and the contact alone is enough to have my heart knocking erratically against my ribcage. Having her this close and not being able to touch her the way I’d like to—my god—it’s a torture I never knew I’d be subjected to.
Willow’s body shifts away from mine as I take the turn into Mia’s driveway. As my tires roll over the gravel drive and I straighten the truck out, Willow’s thigh presses back into mine. I pull up directly in front of Mia’s house, slowing the truck to a stop before I put it in park.
Mia turns to look at Willow, pulling her in for a hug. I miss her warmth the moment it’s gone. “I’m so glad we finally got to hangout. I love you so much and we need to get together again soon.”
“I love you more,” Willow says, hugging her back before they pull away from one another.
Mia looks past Willow to me. “Thanks for the ride. Do me a favor and keep an eye on her for me?”
“I will,” I assure with a quick nod.
Fortunately for all parties involved, it seems like I only have eyes for her lately anyway.
Willow lets out a quiet laugh, shaking her head at her friend. “I can take care of myself, thank you.”
Mia simply shakes her head, chuckling to herself as she climbs out of the truck. “Goodnight! Let me know that you get home safely then, okay?”
“Always,” Willow promises her, leaning forward in her seat as Mia shuts the door and starts walking up to the house. She looks a little less drunk than she did when I got to the bar but I don’t leave until she’s safely inside the house.
Willow sits back against the seat and her arm brushes against mine. I half expect her to shift into the other seat now that there aren’t three of us crammed into the small truck cab, but she doesn’t. She stays right there in the center with her arm and thigh pressing into mine.
Fuck.
We reach the end of Mia's street and I stop the truck. My foot presses hard on the brake pedal, keeping it plastered to the floor as I glance at Willow out of the corner of my eye. There’s only two ways we can go right now, with one taking her back toward town where my house is, and the other leads down along the river, back to her family’s farm.
Willow turns her head to look at me, her face only a few inches from mine. “I don’t want to go home yet.”
My breath catches in my throat. “Okay,” I say, my palms sweating against the steering wheel and my heart beating so loud I worry she can hear it. “Where to, Will?”
She tilts her head slightly to the side. “I don’t care,” she says, her voice soft as a tender smile lifts the corners of her lips. “I’m just not ready to go back yet.”
I stare at her for a moment. There are still faint freckles peppered across the bridge of her nose.
They’re one of the cutest things about her that has persisted all these years.
And I love when she doesn’t hide them under make-up.
Some are so perfectly aligned that they almost look like little constellations.
When we were younger, Willow used to love to stargaze.
She loved to watch the night sky in hopes that she’d see a shooting star.
A smile lifts my own lips, much similar to hers. “I think I know of just the place.”
There’s a meadow along the base of the mountain, far enough from town that the view isn’t polluted by any lights. Out there, the only thing you can see are hundreds of twinkling stars lighting up the bluish-black midnight sky.
One night when we were teenagers, the four of us, including her brothers, all laid in the soft grass, staring up at the sky, talking about our dreams for the years to come.
Noah and Finn didn’t really care much for coming to look at the stars, but after that, Willow wanted to come for every meteor shower.
Sometimes she and I would lie in silence, and other times, we’d talk about the possibilities of what might be out there and whatever else our brains could conjure up at the time.
But I was always the one who brought her here.
Willow’s movements are slow as she blinks and lets out a soft breath. “I knew you would,” she murmurs as she tips her head to the side and rests the weight of it against my shoulder.
A warmth washes over me, settling deep inside the marrow of my bones as I revel in the way she feels against me. She’s under my skin, but then again, she always has been. It’s something I tried to ignore for years and I’m not so sure I can do it anymore.
I’m not so sure I want to.
Willow was always off-limits because of her brothers. With her being younger than me, I didn’t dare to take the time to truly notice the way she’d matured until after she was of legal age and even then, I was already committed to hockey.
I can’t help but feel like time is never on our side. Here we are, both single, both back in town, but both with new commitments and obligations.
And Willow’s the one who’s supposed to be leaving this time.
Grabbing the corners of the blanket I found in the backseat of my truck, I give it a shake before laying it down on the grass. Willow stands with her hands clasped in front of herself, her expression soft, her lips warm with a slight curve to them.
“I haven’t been here in years,” she says quietly as I bend down, straightening out the sides of the blanket.
I lower myself down onto it, motioning for her to follow.
Willow tucks her dress around her knees and wraps my coat around her body as she drops down onto the blanket.
Her bare legs brush against mine as she sits beside me, hip to hip.
“Why not?”
Her chest rises and falls as she lets out a soft breath. She looks up at the sky before turning to me, her gaze meeting mine. “This always felt like our spot. It didn’t feel right coming here without you.”
My heart stumbles over itself. I plant my hands behind me and lean back on them as I study the side of her face. “I’m glad you didn’t bring anyone else here.”
Willow looks back at me, the corners of her mouth tipping up into a smile, crinkling the skin around her eyes. “Me too.”
She mimics my actions, planting her hands back behind her body at an angle and when her arm brushes against mine, neither of us dare to move. She tilts her head back, and her hair falls down her back, hanging between her shoulders.
Her hip is pressed to mine, her arm rests along mine, and if I move my finger a fraction of an inch, that part of my body will be touching hers too. I make a mental note, taking a count of every point of contact with her, wrapping around me like a soft blanket.
This is it, all or nothing. Holding my breath, I take the leap—that risk I know I shouldn’t indulge in because she’s my best friend’s little sister and off limits.
I sweep my forefinger along hers. Willow inhales sharply, her entire body rigid as I pause.
At first, I keep my finger just against hers and then ever so slightly, I lift it over hers, brushing against her knuckle.
A ragged, shallow breath falls from her lips as I drag my finger back along the side of hers.
Her body relaxes and she starts mimicking my movements, brushing her finger up and over mine and back again.
Time is suspended and my heart is a goddamn fluttering mess inside my chest as we go back and forth, tangling our fingers together.
I don’t know how long we stay like this, both of our heads tipped back, staring up at the twinkling stars in the night sky as our fingers wrap around one another. Her skin is soft, like the finest silk. I want to memorize the way she feels and the tenderness in the subtle touch.
“You didn’t finish what you were saying at the bar.”
Her voice is barely above a whisper, but there’s no way I would have missed it, not with how tuned in I am to Willow Alder.
I swallow hard as I keep my gaze trained on the sky above. “What was I saying?”
She turns to look at me, but she doesn’t move her hand from mine. “You know how you said you’d always come find me?”
“Yeah,” I say, my voice hoarse as I pull my hand away, twisting my torso to face her as I sit upright. “I meant that.”
Willow sits upright and shifts her body until she’s facing me head on. “You started to say something else after that.”
The muscle in my jaw tightens, my nostrils widening slightly as I listen to my own heart beat pounding in my ears. “Be careful about what you’re going to ask me next, Willow,” I warn, my gaze trailing down to her parted lips. “Don’t ask questions you don’t want the answer to.”
Her tongue darts out, wetting her lips, tempting me. “What if I do?”
“There’s nothing that happens without consequence,” I say, my voice thick with the lust I’m struggling to keep under control. “If I answer your question, there’s no going back.”
The intensity of her gaze burns down to my core. “Good.” She pauses, her throat bobbing as she swallows hard. “What did you always tell yourself you’d never do?”
She did it. She asked the one question that has the power to change our friendship forever. I’m tired of holding back. I brush my fingers along the side of her face, trailing them down along her jawline. “This,” I murmur, my eyes flicking to hers, searching for approval.
A ragged breath escapes her parted lips as she leans into my palm.
I flatten it against the side of her jaw, my fingers pushing into her hair, her eyes falling closed.
Twisting my torso to face her more, I lower my face to hers, stopping just a fraction of an inch from her mouth.
I pause, my chest rising and falling in rapid succession as my gaze locks on hers.
Her eyebrows lift. “What?” she asks breathlessly, her breath fanning across my face.
“This,” I breathe, lowering my mouth to hers.
Willow inhales sharply just as my lips graze hers.
They’re soft and warm, just as I always imagined they would be.
After a moment passes, her brain seems to catch up to what I’m doing.
Her lips move against mine, hands reaching for me, grabbing at my shirt, pulling me closer.
Our mouths move together, melting into one another and then her lips part. Her tongue slips between mine, deepening the kiss as our tongues tangle. My fingers plunge through her hair, gripping the back of her head as my other reaches for her hips, pulling her toward me.
Willow slips her hands around the back of my neck, lifting up onto her knees. My hand slides from her hip to her knee and I guide her onto my lap. As soon as she settles on top of me and her body presses into mine, I know that I’m absolutely fucked.
She’s everywhere—seeping into my brain and burrowing under my skin.
Her mouth moves with mine, kissing me with a tenderness that has my fingers digging into her flesh, holding her tight.
Breathing her in, I savor the way she feels, her vanilla and jasmine scent flooding my senses.
Hell, I’ve already catalogued every piece of Willow Alder in my brain, but this is an experience I’ve never lived before now.
I’ve lived the last five years wondering how her lips would feel against mine. Wondering how her body would feel pressed against mine like this. How her tongue would taste tangled with mine.
I’ve waited an eternity for this fucking moment and the last thing I’m going to do is let it be fleeting.
Everything around us ceases to exist. Her fingers tangle in the hair against the nape of my neck.
Her lips melt into mine, tongues dancing to their own melody as we taste and tease.
There’s no urgency, no rush. Just two people exploring one another in one of the most intimate ways possible—in ways I’ve only ever dreamed of doing.
All logical thought and possible regret vanishes from the crevices of my mind and is replaced with Willow, and only Willow.
I don’t know what will come from this, but I know I can’t go back to the way we were before.
Kissing her is like unlocking a part of myself that I’ve kept buried beneath the surface for so long.
I’m done denying myself of simple pleasures like this.
Allowing myself one last drink of her, my lips slow, drawing out the tenderness before we break apart. We’re both breathless, hearts racing, chests heaving, desperate for oxygen, although mine might prefer her instead.
Her eyelids lift and the hues of blue swirl in her irises as she sucks in an uneven breath, staring down at me with her arms still around my neck.
Her lips are parted, swollen and pink. A blush creeps across her cheeks as she releases one hand from behind my back and touches her freshly kissed lips with her fingertips.
My heart thumps harder. “I told you not to ask,” I murmur, my voice a low vibration, hoarse with lust and need.
Willow pulls her fingers away from her lips, hooking her hand with the other again behind my neck, and tilts her head to the side. “I’m glad I did.”
“Why’s that?” I ask, my eyebrows tugging together.
A smile spreads across her lips as she lowers her face down to mine, hovering her lips over mine. “Because I’ve been waiting for you to make up your mind.”