Chapter 24
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
JACE
The early morning sun cuts in through the high windows along the east side, casting rays of sunshine across the unfinished floorboards inside the entrance.
We closed on the rink yesterday and the roofing contractors are already here to start repairs.
Walking deeper into the building, I move past the entrance as my mind cycles through our to-do list. Permits, materials, roofing estimates, contractor schedules.
The list feels never-ending and borderline suffocating.
Eventually, this place will be everything we want it to be, we just have to survive the in-between for now.
We agreed I’ll be overseeing the remodel myself for now. Due to his situation, Harrison can’t leave his job until we determine if this venture is going to be lucrative or a bust.
The hinges of the door groan, drawing my attention away from the cracked boards and I turn around as Harrison comes walking inside. His lips are pulled downward and the bags beneath his eyes are dark.
He looks like hell, like he hasn’t slept in weeks.
It’s the kind of exhaustion that settles into your bones, the kind that festers, refusing to go away on its own.
It’s mental exhaustion and I can’t help but wonder if it’s from the stress of this project.
He stops when he gets to me, his shoulders slightly slumped.
“You look like you could use this,” I say, handing him one of the hot coffees I stopped to grab on my way into town this morning.
“Thanks,” he says, his voice gruff as he looks out past me at the ice. Nothing about his appearance is new. It’s become his normal recently, although he appears more fatigued today than he has before. There’s something beneath the surface that’s eating at him.
He spins the coffee cup sleeve around his cup over and over as if it’s grounding him. He doesn’t take a sip right away. He gazes out at the ice, like he’s desperately searching for some answer or resolve.
“You good?” I ask, my eyebrows tugging together as my eyes quickly scan him. He’s wearing a pair of joggers and a sweatshirt, which isn’t out of the ordinary for him. His hair's a bit disheveled, but it’s the bags under his eyes that really grab my attention.
He looks back at me, his expression giving nothing away. “I’m fine.”
Knowing Harrison’s aversion to emotions and discussing them, I let the issue go instead of pushing it. “I was just double checking our list and making a few notes.”
Harrison nods. “We have all the contractors lined up, right?”
“Except for minor things like painting and cosmetic stuff. I figured I could handle most of that.”
“I told you I’d help,” he says, his voice low—not in warning, but just as a reminder.
“I know we can figure it out when it’s time for that stage of work,” I say, not wanting to dive into the specifics of it now.
Judging by the look on his face, it’s apparent he’s dealing with some other things that are probably taking a front seat in his mind. “Are you sure you still want to do this? It’s not too late to back out if it’s going to be too much.”
The muscle in his jaw tightens and he shakes his head. “No, this is what I want to do. I put in my resignation letter, so at the end of the month, my schedule will open up a lot more.”
His words hang in the air for a second. He turns to look at me. “I told you, this is everything I’ve ever wanted to do.”
Damn, I was not expecting that.
His voice carries conviction, but there’s still something under it. It’s not doubt, but it almost sounds like regret. This has always been his dream and for him to make that jump, even when Erin tried to talk him out of it—–it says a lot about his commitment to this.
“Okay,” I say, nodding at him. “Just know, if it ever changes, all you have to do is tell me. There will never be any hard feelings.”
He forces a smile onto his face, although his expression does soften and relax a bit. “Thanks. That won’t happen, but I appreciate the sentiment.”
“We’re taking on a lot here.” I pause, chewing on the inside of my cheek for a moment. “Willow offered to help with anything we might need, when the time comes if there is something she can help with.”
I don’t know why the hell those words slipped out, but it’s like my mouth formed the sentence before my brain had the chance to approve it first. Willow, Willow, Willow. Always there, always infiltrating my thoughts.
Harrison tilts his head to the side and cocks an eyebrow. “Willow Alder? You’ve been hanging out with her a lot lately.”
“Not really,” I retort, shaking my head at him. “I’ve just been helping get her shop ready.”
“When I texted you last night, she was at your house for dinner…again.”
She’s been over to my house quite a few times this last week for dinner, among other things. I knew once we crossed that line, there was no going back, but now I can’t seem to move in any direction other than hers.
“There’s something going on between the two of you, isn’t there?”
My eyes flash to his and I shake my head immediately, the lie bitter on my tongue before I even speak the words. “No, we’re just friends.”
The moment the words leave my mouth, I feel them settle between us, heavy and unconvincing. Harrison isn’t stupid. He’s known me long enough to see right through my lies.
Harrison flattens his lips. “Did you guys sleep together?”
Shit. I haven’t talked to a single soul about anything that’s been going on between Willow and me.
Aside from Harrison, my other best friend is her damn brother.
I don’t even know how the hell I would approach that conversation with him.
I run my tongue across my top teeth, choosing not to respond, which is enough of an answer for him.
“Thought so,” he snorts. “You know those ‘just friends’ situations where the lines get blurred don’t really work out well, right?”
“I mean, they do if the lines don’t get blurred.”
Harrison levels his gaze on mine. “Listen, I am all for not forming emotional attachments, but just be careful. It’s Willow, and you know her brothers will bury you if you hurt her.”
My throat bobs as I swallow hard and lift my hand to scratch at the back of my neck. “Yeah, I know.”
“They don’t know about the two of you, do they?”
“Fuck no,” I admit, swiftly shaking my head as we both turn away from the ice. “I don’t—am I supposed to say something to Noah? It’s just casual and nothing more. I mean, she means something to me, but that doesn't mean it’s something he really needs to know about, right?”
Harrison scratches at his chin as we step outside into the bright sunlight. The cold hits us immediately — that sharp, crisp kind of chill that bites at your skin even through layers. The parking lot is glazed with a thin layer of frost, every car glittering under the pale morning light.
“I mean, this is Noah we're talking about.” Harrison lets out a soft laugh. “Didn’t he punch that guy she was dating in high school?”
My eyes widen as I stare back at him. Harrison didn’t even go to our school, but now that he brings it up, I do remember Noah telling him about it one night when we were all hanging out.
“Oh yeah,” I pause, grimacing as I remember it all too well. “I don’t remember his name, but he was a fucking tool.”
Willow dated some guy who was a year older than her during her freshman year of high school. He was dating this other girl that Willow didn’t know about, and when the truth came out, Noah knocked him on his ass.
“You should tell him,” Harrison says with a shrug, as if it’s a simple decision. “This could get really messy if you don’t. And plus, you already slept with her, so it’s not like you’re asking for permission or something. You’re just informing him of the situation.”
“You know he’s going to be pissed, right?”
Harrison purses his lips and nods slowly. “Yeah, I know. But think about how much worse it will be if you keep it a secret.”
I clench my jaw and swallow hard, raking a hand through my hair as I stare out at the parking lot. “Even though this is just casual?”
“I don’t know what to tell you, man.” Harrison sighs in defeat. “Sure, it’s casual. Sure, it might stay that way, but he’s your best friend. There’s always a chance he could find out.” He pauses, chewing on the inside of his cheek. “What’s Willow think?”
Shoving my hands into the front pockets of my jeans, I mull over his words. “It’s not something we’ve talked about.”
Hell, there isn’t much talking at all when the two of us are alone.
Her hair spilling across my pillow, fanning out like a halo around the top of her head, flashes through my mind.
The sound of her laughter. The way she whispers my name rolls like a breathless prayer when I settle between her legs.
The way she curls into me, her even breath against my bare chest like that’s exactly where she belongs.
“Maybe start there,” Harrison suggests, lifting a shoulder as we step away from the front of the building and make our way to both of our vehicles. “See what she has to say and then decide.”
My chest tightens.
“And if she doesn’t want him to know?”
Harrison stares at me for a moment before his tired expression cracks and he lets out a string of laughter. “Dude, I don’t know. I don’t know how the hell I’m the one offering any advice right now when my life is currently a mess.”
“Ah fuck. I’m an asshole for even bothering you with this.”
“No, you’re not,” he says, shaking his head. “Whatever you decide, I’ll just make sure I have an eulogy written,” he pauses and smirks, shrugging his shoulders as he pulls open his car door. “You know, just in case.”
“At least make sure it’s funny.”
“Oh, it will be,” he says with a chuckle. “This alone is hilarious.”
My eyebrows cinch closer. “What is?”
“The fact that you’re secretly sleeping with your best friend’s sister, who you have known your entire life and have feelings for, but you’re in denial and think you can keep this casual and it won’t blow up in your face.”
I narrow my eyes on him. “I don’t have feelings for her.”
“Yeah, okay, buddy.” He smiles and rolls his eyes. “You’ll wake up eventually, but until then, we can just pretend.” He lets out a laugh. “I gotta go get Liam. Let me know how you make out.”
Harrison shuts his door without another word and the ones he spoke out loud follow me into my truck. He thinks he’s right, but he’s not. Things between us can stay casual, regardless of how I might feel about her. I care about Willow. I always have, and nothing will ever change that.
I care about her enough to know that I can never give her more than this. And she’s okay with that…isn’t she?
The engine hums to life as I turn the key in the ignition and stare out through the windshield for a long moment before I finally put my truck in drive. The gray sky shows a threat of showers in the near future and I slowly pull my truck out onto the road, heading in the direction of my house.
I thought sleeping with Willow would get her out of my head, but it’s been the opposite.
She’s everywhere I look and every thought that passes has a way of drifting back to her.
I know what her lips taste like and that’s the only thing I crave now.
There has to be a way to reverse this. There has to be a way to keep things casual, to keep them simple.
But as I pull into my driveway and see the empty space in the driveway where the fallen leaves create an outline from where she was parked, I know I’m lying… not just to Harrison, but mostly to myself.