Chapter Three #2
Dad nodded. “I was seventeen. That was taken maybe three or four months before we left Alabama.”
Micah stared at his dad’s image, caught by… something. Maybe it was the way his dad was looking at the other guy, the almost tangible connection between them. Then it clicked.
“This is Hayden, isn’t it?” When Dad didn’t respond, Micah looked up. “Dad?”
He sighed. “Yeah, that was Hayden. We were the same age. We’d known each other all our lives, ever since kindergarten.”
That might have accounted for the closeness between the two, but…
Micah looked again, only this time he put aside the thought that this was his dad, and tried to view it objectively.
That was when the significance of the looks they were giving each other hit him like a blow to the stomach. It was so obvious.
“You were in love with him.”
Dad flinched. “How do you know?”
Micah sighed. “Dad, I may be gay, but that doesn’t mean I’m dumb. Or deaf, or blind, for that matter. The way he’s staring at you….”
“How? How is he staring at me?” The pain in his dad’s voice was almost too much to bear.
“Like you hung the moon,” Micah said simply. He placed the strip of photos on the seat cushion next to his dad.
Dad sagged against the cushions. “I’ve looked at these photos so many times over the years. I tried to tell myself that none of it was real, that it was a phase, that I didn’t really love him, heart, body and soul. But then I’d look at his face, that expression, and I’d know I was lying to myself.”
Micah shifted closer. “Dad, what happened?” he asked softly. His mind was still reeling from the fact that his dad had loved a guy. Micah’s world had just tilted a little on its axis.
Dad took a long drink from his glass. “I was over at Hayden’s house one evening.
We were studying for a test. His parents had gone out to see some friends, and we didn’t expect them back for hours.
” He forced out a bitter laugh. “Turned out they’d gotten halfway there, and his mom remembered something she’d forgotten.
I can’t even recall what it was now. All I know is, they came back early. ”
“Oh God. They didn’t catch you guys in bed or something?”
Dad swallowed. “No. We never got that far. They found us on his bed though, fully clothed, but… kissing.” He met Micah’s gaze, his eyes misted over. “Do you know how many times I’ve regretted that they turned up when they did? We’d finally decided to… that is, he’d have been… my first.”
For one second, they were no longer father and son, but two men, sharing an intimate moment that both could understand.
“Seventeen. Wow.” Micah shook his head. “Compared to you, I’m definitely a late bloomer.”
“And before you even think about pointing out that we were underage, all I’m gonna say is, if you’re telling me kids that age aren’t having sex nowadays, I—”
“No, no, I wasn’t going to say a thing!” Micah protested. “Please. Keep going. What happened next?” Judging from his dad’s emotional state, it had to be something pretty drastic.
“Hayden’s dad grabbed hold of me, yanked me off the bed, made me get my stuff, and marched me to the front door. The last thing he said before he slammed the door in my face was that I wasn’t welcome in their home again.”
“Aw, shit.” Micah couldn’t entirely empathize with what his dad had gone through, because he’d never cared that deeply about someone, but he guessed it had to have hurt him to the core.
Dad snorted. “Oh, believe me, that was just the start. By the time I got home, he’d already called my parents.
I guess I found out that night what my father really thought about…
homosexuals. Although it might have been better if he’d used that term, instead of the one he ultimately chose.
He shoved me down onto a chair at the dining table, then sat facing me, his face like thunder.
” He shivered. “I saw him in a completely different light that night. My mom too. And no, I’m not gonna repeat what they said to me, because it’s bad enough that you know they said some stuff.
At least now you know why we don’t visit them a whole lot.
” He grimaced. “No way would I subject you to them.”
“Was that the end of it?” It certainly went a long way to explaining why he rarely saw his grandparents.
Dad shook his head. “They moved me to a new school, miles away.” He scowled.
“I was in my final year of high school, getting ready to go to college, and they moved me without so much as a word. I didn’t get a say.
On top of that, I wasn’t to call Hayden, to try to see him…
basically, I wasn’t to go within sight of him.
And I tried, believe me.” He took another drink.
“That was when my dad dropped his bombshell. He’d gotten a new job, in Wyoming, and we were moving. ”
Micah gaped. “He… he didn’t move, just to keep you and Hayden apart, did he? Tell me it was just a coincidence that a better job turned up right then.” He didn’t want to think that his granddad could do something so… cold, so calculating.
Dad shrugged. “To be honest? I have no idea. I wrote letters to Hayden, telling him what was gonna happen. I had no clue if he received them.” He swallowed.
“I never heard from him again. Later that year, I found out why. I got in touch with a classmate from my old high school. Seems Hayden had moved too. She had no idea where, though.”
“Oh, Dad.” Micah could feel the misery pouring out of him. “Then what?”
“What do you think? I went to college. Only, instead of going to a college in another state, like I’d planned, my parents insisted I went to the University of Wyoming, and that I stayed at home.
I guess they didn’t trust me to be out of their sight for too long.
And then during the third semester, I met someone.
” He smiled, and the change in his demeanor was enough to tell Micah who that someone was.
“You met Mom, didn’t you?”
Dad nodded. “She was so quiet. A shy little mouse of a girl, in my Economics class.”
Micah snickered. “Mom—quiet?”
Dad laughed softly. “Yeah, I know. She changed a lot over the years. For the better, I think. But you should’ve seen my parents’ faces, the night I brought her home to meet them.”
“Did… did you ever tell Mom about… Hayden?”
Dad sighed. “You know what? I think I’ve talked enough for one night. I’m gonna go up to bed, and so should you.”
“Oh. Okay.” Micah didn’t want to go to bed. He wanted to hear more.
“But I promise, this conversation isn’t over. We will talk about this again, okay? Just… not in the middle of the night. And not when your sister is around. This is between you and me, all right?”
“All right.” Micah got up from the couch. “There is one thing, though…”
Dad stood up too. “Yeah? What’s that?”
“Paying Greg’s hospital bills. Inviting him to stay here. Why?”
Dad picked up the letter and photos, gazing at them. “Good question. I’m not really sure of the answer. I suppose… I’m doing it for Hayden.” He raised his head and smiled. “That will have to do for the moment.”
“Fair enough.” Micah walked slowly toward the door. “I’ll see you in a few hours. I’m coming with you to the hospital to see Greg.”
Dad joined him. “I never expected anything less. Now get some sleep.” Dad surprised him by leaning over and kissing his cheek. “Love you, son.”
Micah’s chest tightened. “I love you too.” He opened the door, and climbed the stairs to his room, the warm drink forgotten. He had a feeling sleep would be a long time coming.