Chapter Nineteen June 30
Chapter Nineteen
Joshua gave his bag of ingredients one last check. He smiled to himself when he recalled the conversation with Alex of a few nights ago. The subject had been… pancakes. When Joshua had replied that even he could manage pancakes, Alex had fallen silent for a moment.
A very short moment.
“Let’s see. Are we talking pancakes with blueberries, or chocolate chips, or something like that?”
“Well, yeah.” Joshua was puzzled. Doesn’t everyone eat their pancakes like that?
“Do you use a ready-made mix?”
“Sure.”
“Do you pour it into a molded nonstick pan?”
“No, we have an electric griddle with molds for pancakes.”
Alex’s resultant sigh had told him those weren’t the answers Alex was looking for.
“Okay. We’re not talking about those kinds of pancakes. I’m talking about crepes, light, thin, delicate, a French classic. Not something you’d have every day, and maybe not with breakfast, but as a dessert, with lemon juice and sugar, or orange sauce, or even chocolate.”
Joshua had to admit, they sounded delicious. “And are they easy to make?”
Alex chuckled. “That depends. If you’re the kind of guy who likes to flip his pancakes in the air, you might want to think about how high you’re tossing them. Not that I’ve ever had a pancake-stuck-to-the-ceiling scenario, but there’s always a first time.”
Joshua decided right then and there not to afford Alex any opportunities where he’d have to scrape a pancake off the ceiling. “Okay, sounds good. When?”
“How about Saturday? Come for dinner, and we can make the crepes for dessert. I think I’ve got all the ingredients already.”
“Uh-uh. You’re making me dinner. The least I can do is buy my own damn groceries.”
Alex laughed. “Fine. I know by now not to argue. I’ll text you the shopping list.”
Joshua was still smiling when Greg came into the kitchen. “Ready for your cooking lesson? You seem to be looking forward to it.”
“Yeah, but crepes aren’t the sort of cooking I can bring home.”
“Crepes?” Greg grinned. “My, but we’re getting fancy. You having dinner with Alex too?”
Joshua nodded. “See if you can get Micah to come out of his cave—I mean, studio—and eat something? He’s been in there all day.”
“I will. Now go have a nice evening. Say hi to Alex for me.”
Joshua gave him a quick hug, then studied him carefully for a moment. “It feels good, doesn’t it? Knowing the end is in sight?”
Greg sighed. “I guess. I’m not really thinking about the trial, because we’ve got months yet, but…
yeah. I just wish I could have been in that courtroom when their lawyer argued for them to be released from custody, and the judge refused.
And they had the nerve to plead not guilty.
” Greg stared at him with wide eyes. “Seriously?”
“Then let’s hope December 19th brings them an early Christmas present they won’t forget.” Joshua knew Alex had mentioned putting them away for a couple of decades at least, but he wasn’t going to think about that.
It felt too much like he’d jinx the whole thing.
Greg nodded. “Now go make crepes and have fun.”
Joshua patted his arm and headed for the door with his bag of ingredients. Dinner with Alex, and a cooking lesson.
Perfect.
~ 0 ~
Two hours earlier
Alex took a last glance around the house, content that everything was where it should be prior to Joshua’s arrival. He’d prepared a casserole with chunks of beef, onions, carrots, mushrooms, stock and red wine, and it was cooking slowly, its aromas already pervading the air.
Time to relax.
As much as Alex loved his weekends, he was all too aware that they’d become times for crossing things off his To Do list. That had changed, however, since Joshua had been around.
Friday nights or Saturdays were generally when Joshua came to dinner, or when Alex gave him a cooking lesson.
Alex looked forward to spending time with him.
If it wasn’t a lesson, it was pizza and a movie, or a meet-up for coffee.
Weekends had become Joshua times, and that was just fine as far as Alex was concerned.
He poured himself a coffee and went into the living room.
Weekends were also the times when he caught up with what was happening on social media.
He wasn’t an avid Facebook user, although his office had a page, and he left Twitter to his assistants, who seemed to be forever Tweeting about something.
Alex was no fool. As much as social media was a tool to be used like any other, he knew it had its pitfalls.
He existed online as County Attorney Alexander Rycliffe, a politician who considered every angle before putting something out into the spotlight.
Then there was another account, one that couldn’t be linked to him.
One where he was free to browse, comment, post…
usually on sites that were predominantly LGBT.
Keeping the two halves of his life separate had worked for the last five years, and Alex saw no reason to change that.
He sat on the couch, settled back against the seat cushions, and got out his phone. He had a couple of sites that always lifted his spirits, and these were his goto places whenever he was online. Instagram had to be his favorite, especially…
Alex stared at the screen, a cold hand trickling down his spine.
What the fuck? He did his best to expand the photo, his stomach in turmoil.
It couldn’t be. He couldn’t drag his gaze away from that image, until at last he flung his phone across the room, where it fell onto the hearth, its screen fractured.
“Fuck you!” He hurled his exclamation out into the air, his heart pounding, his body rigid. Then all energy left him, and he crumbled, dropping to his knees.
That fucking bastard. His head ached, and all he wanted was for the pain to go.
The pain that seemed to emanate from his fucking soul.
~ 0 ~
Joshua locked his truck and walked up to Alex’s front door. He rang the doorbell and waited. Nothing. He rang again. When there was still no answer, he stepped back to peer at the house. No open windows that he could see. Joshua got out his phone and called Alex. It went to voicemail.
Okay, now I’m starting to worry.
Joshua thumped on the door. “Alex? You in there? Are you okay?” He sagged internally with relief when he heard Alex, his voice growing louder.
Wait a sec. He sounds… wasted.
The door was flung open, and Alex stood there, swaying slightly. “Hey,” he drawled. His hair was unkempt, his eyes were reddened, and his face blotchy.
“Christ, look at you.” Joshua stepped into the interior of the house and closed the door.
There was no question as to the cause—the smell of alcohol poured off him.
Joshua dropped his bag to the floor and grasped Alex’s upper arms. “I think you need to sit down and let me get some coffee inside ya.”
Alex widened his eyes. “Why do I need coffee?” He gave a lopsided grin. “I got tequila.”
Joshua shook his head slowly. “Not anymore you don’t. I think you’ve had enough.”
Alex narrowed his gaze. “Trust me. I haven’t had nearly enough.” He pulled out of Joshua’s grasp and stumbled toward the living room. “C’mon. There’s still some left.”
Joshua followed him, his heartbeat racing. This wasn’t like Alex. “Please let me make you some coffee? Have you eaten?” He could smell something cooking, but judging by the state of Alex, none of it had passed his lips. “Why don’t you sit on the couch, and I’ll fix us a bite to eat?”
To his surprise, Alex came to a halt in the middle of the room, and turned to face him, unsteady on his feet. “Men suck, you know that?”
Joshua blinked, then recovered. “Okay, you know what? I’m gonna go with the simplest interpretation of that sentence, all right? And not all men suck.”
Alex pulled a sullen face. “He didn’t. Suck, I mean. Maybe that was a clue an’ I missed it.” He wagged a finger in Joshua’s face. “Never trust a guy who doesn’t wanna suck your dick. ‘Snot gonna work out.”
“I’ll take your word for it.” Joshua gently guided Alex to the couch, where he half-sat, half-dropped onto it, his head falling onto a cushion.
“Now stay there. I’ll be back with coffee.
” Except he had a feeling Alex was too far gone for coffee to be any use.
He went into the kitchen, relieved to see the coffee machine almost full.
Hallelujah. He poured out a mug, and took it back to Alex, who was lying with his eyes closed, his arm flung over them.
“Here ya go.” Joshua put down the mug and eased Alex up into a sitting position. “Drink this.”
“Don’t wan’ it. Don’t want anything,” Alex murmured. He stared morosely into the distance.
Joshua gazed at him in dismay. What the fuck happened?
He sat beside Alex, his hand on Alex’s knee.
“Please. Just drink a little. For me?” It sounded so pathetic, but he couldn’t stand to see Alex like this.
To his relief, Alex took the mug, wrapping his hands around it like he was holding onto it for support.
“Dunno why I’m goin’ on like this,” Alex said suddenly.
“I mean, anyone seein’ me would think I didn’t know what he was like.
But I knew. After what he’d done? ’Course I knew.
Still… I didn’t think he’d…” A sound rolled out of him, something that to Joshua’s ears was almost a sob.
“You know somethin’? I didn’t think I cared anymore.
I thought after five years, he couldn’t hurt me anymore.
Guess it shows I knew fuck all.” He put the mug on the coffee table beside him, leaned forward, his elbows on his knees, and put his head in his hands.
Joshua hesitated for a second or two, then put his arm around Alex’s shoulders.
He leaned in close and whispered, “I don’t know what’s happened.
I only know you’re hurting.” And that had to be the understatement of the year.
Gone was the jovial, lighthearted friend he’d come to know, buried somewhere deep inside a man who was in pain. Joshua had rarely felt so useless.
“I’m gonna put you to bed,” he announced. It was all he could think of doing. “You need to sleep this off.”
“Don’t go,” Alex blurted out, grabbing Joshua’s arm with surprising strength.
Joshua gazed at him. “I’m not going anywhere. I’ll be right here until you wake up. I’ll make sure you have water by your bed, and if you need anything, you just holler.”
Alex swallowed. “Thank you. Don’t want to be alone. Not tonight.”
Joshua helped him to his feet, and together they made their way to Alex’s bedroom.
Joshua sat him on the edge of the bed, removed his jeans, socks and T-shirt, leaving him in his briefs, and pulled back the comforter to ease him under it.
He covered Alex, then went into his bathroom to fill a glass with water, which he placed on the nightstand.
Joshua gazed down at Alex, his eyes closed, his breathing erratic.
“Get some sleep,” he murmured, before switching off the lamp beside the bed.
He left the room quietly and went into the kitchen.
There was something in the oven that smelled delicious, but Joshua was in no mood to eat anything.
He switched off the oven, figuring whatever it was would have been cooked by now. Then he returned to the living room.
He caught sight of Alex’s phone on the hearth, its screen splintered.
“Oh Lord, what brought this on?” Gingerly, Joshua picked it up and placed it on the table.
Apart from the phone, the only other items in view were a heavy glass and a nearly empty bottle of tequila.
He picked up Alex’s untouched coffee and drank it, grateful for its warmth.
He felt chilled, and it was nothing to do with the air temperature.
A phone warbled, and he looked around. On a table by the door stood a phone, upright in its cradle, and beside it a winking red light. He wasn’t about to answer it, until a familiar voice came out of the speaker.
“Alex? What the hell was that all about?”
Joshua lurched across the room and grabbed the handset before Manda stopped talking. “Hey. It’s Joshua.” He walked over to the couch and sank onto it.
“Is Alex there? He left me this really weird message on my machine. I tried to call his cell first, but I couldn’t get through.”
Joshua eyed Alex’s phone. “Yeah, well, there might be a reason for that.” He sighed heavily. “I don’t know what’s going on with him, but he’s drunk as a skunk. I just put him to bed.”
There was silence for a moment. “Weren’t you guys doing something this evening? I thought he mentioned it.”
“Yeah, it was supposed to be dinner and then making crepes. Only when I got here…” Joshua tried to recall everything Alex had said. “This has something to do with his ex. At least, I think so. He said something about not thinking he could hurt him after five years.”
Manda sighed. “Yeah, that would be Todd. But that’s all you know?”
“To be honest, he wasn’t making a whole lotta sense.”
“But he’s in bed now?”
Joshua nodded, before realizing she couldn’t see that. “Yup.”
Another silence. “I really don’t like this, him getting wasted when he knew you were coming. Look, I know it’s a lot to ask, but… please don’t leave him alone.”
He smiled to himself. “Way ahead of ya.” He’d send Micah a text and tell them not to expect him home that night. Heaven knows what they’ll make of that. Joshua fully expected to get the third degree when he got home.
“Aw, thank you. I’m glad he’s got you around. Can I give you my number, so you can call me in the morning and let me know how he is?”
“Sure.” Joshua pulled his phone out of his jacket pocket, and loaded Contacts. “Fire when ready.” She rattled off her number, and he tapped it into the phone and saved it. “Got it.”
“Thank you, Joshua. You’re a good guy.”
“Hey, we take care of our friends, right? I’m sure he’d do the same for me, if the situation was reversed.”
“Yeah. Take care of him. And call me tomorrow.” She disconnected.
Joshua returned the handset to its cradle.
He quickly composed a text and sent it to Micah, before putting away his own phone.
His stomach rumbled, and he went in search of some crackers to shut it up.
He could have investigated whatever it was Alex had made for them, but he knew it wouldn’t take much to take the edge off his hunger.
His internal grumblings assuaged, he stood in the doorway to Alex’s room, gazing at the prone figure beneath the comforter.
I sure hope you can get past whatever this is.
Joshua knew one thing for sure. He’d have a few questions for Alex once the hangover from hell had dissipated.