Love Without Demands (The Bouvier Family Saga #3)

Prologue 1

PAUL BOUVIER - AGE 33

“Paul, I just wanted to let you know the divorce papers have been served to your wife in Vermont.”

Clutching the phone to my ear, my teeth ground together when my attorney said that word. Wife. Chloe Bouvier had been my wife for over a decade, but recently, the title was in name only. There was absolutely no love left in our marriage.

“Thanks, George. Keep me updated,” I said before hanging up.

Chloe had always been a selfish woman, but it hadn’t bothered me that much. Not until our son was born. I smiled at the thought of Auburn, my five-year-old, with his dark hair and big blue eyes. He was a good boy, quiet and thoughtful, but with a ready smile whenever I came home from work each night.

A smile that he lacked whenever his mother was around, however. It hurt me to the depths of my soul that the woman I’d married was so cold and unfeeling toward our boy.

And toward Evelyn, or Evie as Auburn liked to call her. I picked up the photo on my desk, and my lips crooked up at the corners. My baby girl and Auburn were sharing my lap, and three sets of matching blue eyes stared back at me. Evie’s hair was a few shades lighter than mine and my son’s, but otherwise, the family resemblance was obvious.

How the hell can Chloe’s heart not melt when she looks at these two precious children? They were my world. My wife was too, in the beginning, but after Auburn had come into our lives, Chloe’s narcissistic personality had been shoved to the forefront. She was cold and unfeeling, bordering on cruel.

I knew she was jealous of our son since she was no longer the sole center of my universe, but that’s how it’s supposed to be, right? When you have children, you make room in your lives and in your hearts. We should have been drawn closer as a couple, but the opposite happened.

Chloe and I hadn’t shared a bed in a long time. Well, except for that one night months ago. Fuck. I hated myself for giving in to the temptations of the bottle.

Reminded of my vice, I stand and pour myself two fingers of bourbon before walking to the huge windows and looking out over Manhattan. I’d built the Bouvier fashion empire here, and I hoped one day I could hand over the reins to Auburn and Evie.

Chloe had left for a retreat in Vermont the day after I’d allowed her into my bed all those months ago, and I can’t say I was saddened by that. The guilt of sleeping with my wife ate at me, and when she announced one day later that she was going away for a while, relief tore through me like a freight train.

Why did I feel guilty about sleeping with my own wife? This is going to make me sound like a total asshole, but here we go. I’d begun to develop feelings for someone else. Someone I couldn’t and shouldn’t want. But I did.

So many times I’d drowned myself in a bottle of bourbon, and when Chloe appeared in my bedroom that night in June, offering herself to me, I took the opportunity she was giving. It had been about a year since we’d last had sex, probably the night Evie was conceived.

With liquor sloshing through my veins and sexual neglect hardening my cock, I’d ripped Chloe’s negligee off and tossed her on my bed. Our joining that night wasn’t gentle. It wasn’t filled with sentiments or thoughts of reconciliation. No, it was a hard, rutting fuck from behind, meant only to satiate a biological need.

I cringed at the memory and slugged back the contents of my glass as my eyes caught on an orange leaf floating on the September breeze. I loved fall in New York.

My little girl was six months old now. Her mother had been gone for three months. Three fucking months! She’d just abandoned her infant daughter and five-year-old son, and on the rare occasions Chloe would call, she didn’t even ask about them.

That only solidified my decision to serve her with divorce papers. There was absolutely no chance that this marriage could be saved. I’d tried for years. I’d spoiled her, showered her with attention, flowers, and gifts, but the more I gave, the colder she became.

Because I wasn’t giving her everything . I wasn’t giving her my undivided adoration. Chloe was incredibly jealous of my relationship with my kids. I didn’t neglect my soon-to-be-ex-wife, not by any means, but any time I spent with Evie and Auburn drew more and more derision and contempt from her.

So I finally did it. I called my attorney and got him to draw up the divorce papers. It was a fair settlement, giving Chloe much more than our prenup allowed, but I didn’t care, and I was pretty sure she would be amenable to it as well. She was wealthy before our marriage, and with the amount of money I was offering, it would only increase her monetary worth. All I asked was that I be granted custody of the kids. Hell, she didn’t want them anyway; that much was obvious.

The phone on my desk buzzed, and I turned from the window and hit the button to connect to my personal assistant. “Yes, Carol?”

“Mr. Bouvier, Franklin is pulling the car around.”

“Thank you. I’ll head down now.”

I set down the empty glass and pulled on my suit jacket. Checking the mirror in my personal restroom, I brushed down the stray locks of my black hair and straightened my tie, transforming myself into Paul Bouvier, the composed and stylish CEO of a major fashion house.

Appearances counted in my industry, and I didn’t want my employees to see the man I’d become. A broken man with a dependency on alcohol just to get through the miserable days and nights.

But, hopefully, that misery would be alleviated soon.

I entered my grandiose red brick home through the front door, my shoes squeaking across the cream marble floor. My nose led me to the kitchen, and I paused in the arched doorway.

Estrella Acosta was standing with her back to me, Evie on her hip, while she sang a low tune in Spanish. Her dark hair hung down her back in a long braid, and I noticed a bead of sweat drip down the tawny brown skin of her neck.

Estrella had been our nanny since Auburn was a baby, and I’d always been fond of the woman. She was kind and gentle, a true nurturer.

With Chloe gone, I was solely responsible for the children once Estrella got off work at six. But recently, she’d started staying much later, helping me with dinner and putting the kids to bed. Our employee/employer relationship had developed into an easy friendship, and my fondness eventually turned into more.

So much more. I’d fallen in love with my children’s nanny. I kept my shameful feelings to myself until one night, she’d broken down in tears and confessed her love for me. God, the way my heart had almost burst from my chest at her admission.

And suddenly, my feelings weren’t quite so shameful. They were good and pure, and I admitted to her that I felt the same. Absolutely nothing physical had happened between us since that evening a few weeks ago, though I longed to touch her, hold her hand, kiss her rosy lips.

When Estrella turned to find me staring, her beautiful face broke into a smile. “Paul…”

“Hi, Estrella.” I crossed the room, fighting the urge to tuck away that stray piece of hair that always seemed to escape her braid and curl in front of her ear.

Her shy brown eyes blinked up at me as she stroked Evie’s caramel hair. “Your daughter has been asking for you.”

As if on cue, Evie babbled, “Dadadadadaaaaa.”

“Come here, my princess,” I said, taking the little one and cuddling her to my chest. Evelyn Bouvier was a happy baby, constantly enjoying the sound of her own voice.

Auburn burst into the room then, and I bent to scoop him up with my other arm. He patted Evie’s head and kissed her sweetly on the nose. My boy adored his baby sister, and I loved the affection between the two.

“How was school today?” I asked him, and he beamed a smile up at me.

“Good. I drawed a picture of our family.” He points at a drawing on the refrigerator. “See? It’s me and Evie and you and Straya.” He couldn’t quite pronounce Estrella’s name.

My heart broke a little at the fact that my son didn’t even include his mother in a family drawing. If he already neglected to realize that she was part of his family, what kind of influence would her coldness have on him as he grew up?

For so long, I’d been reluctant to file for divorce because I thought that would be damaging to my kids, but now I knew I was doing the right thing. Growing up in a loving household is more important than anything.

I kissed the top of his messy hair. “That’s such a pretty picture,” I told him. “You’re my smart boy, aren’t you?”

“Uh-huh,” he said with a nod. “Straya said I can put the pepperonis on the pizza.”

“Good boy.” I set him on the counter beside the sink and instructed him to wash his hands.

“Let me take this little peanut while you get changed,” Estrella told me, taking Evie. Her hand brushed my arm, and I felt a jolt of electricity. Our eyes met, and I knew she felt it too.

After dinner, we worked together to get the kids ready for bed. I watched from the doorway of Auburn’s room as she read a book to him, and then she bent to kiss his forehead when he drifted off to sleep. My heart almost exploded with love at the tender gesture. Estrella was more of a mother to my children than Chloe ever dreamed about being.

I went downstairs to my study and poured myself a drink, sipping it slowly until I heard soft footsteps on the stairs. Then I leaned against the doorframe, waiting for her to come say goodnight.

With her purse over her arm, she came down the darkened hallway, and I grew aroused at the easy sway of her hips. Estrella had a gorgeous body, all soft curves and subtle sensuality.

“Can I speak with you in my office, please?”

Her eyes flashed with worry as she entered, and I directed her to the leather sofa. She sat primly on the edge as I sat inches from her, not daring to touch her.

“Is something wrong, Paul?”

“No, not at all. In fact, I haven’t felt this good in a long time.” Inhaling a deep breath, I held her brown eyes with my blue ones. “I filed for divorce from Chloe.”

Estrella sucked in a breath, and her hand went to her chest. “Oh.” Her voice was a soft squeak.

“I know how you feel about divorce, but there’s no way I can stay in this situation any longer.”

Her eyes lowered and she nodded. “I understand.”

My finger crooked beneath her chin, and her eyes went round when I lifted her face. I’d never touched her in this way before, but I needed her to understand. “I meant it when I told you I was in love with you, Estrella. I want us to be together.”

Tears filled her pretty eyes, and one escaped down the curve of her cheek. I wiped it away with my thumb, and she bit into her lower lip. “I don’t want to be a homewrecker, Paul.”

“You’re not,” I assured her. “You know my marriage has been over for a very long time, and this house isn’t a home without you in it. Did you mean it when you said you love me?”

“I did,” she breathed, and I reached for her hand, pressing a kiss to the back of it. The skin was soft and smelled like Evie’s baby shampoo.

“I know you’re worried about how things will look, so we can wait an appropriate amount of time after the divorce is final, and then… then I want you to be my wife, Estrella.”

She closed her eyes and shook her head. “You don’t want to marry me, Paul. I’m not… in your league.”

Cupping her pretty face with both hands, I obliterated the physical barriers we’d both maintained. “Estrella, you are so far out of my league. I don’t deserve you, but that doesn’t mean I don’t love you.”

She looked up, blinking away the tears that were threatening, before returning her gaze to my face. “I love you too, but—”

“No buts. If we love each other, we should be together.” I tilted my forehead against hers, inhaling the cinnamon scent from the snickerdoodles she’d made for dessert. “You are the most incredible woman I’ve ever known, my beautiful star. You are kindhearted and warm, the type of mother my children deserve, and the type of wife I want.”

Her hands rose to rest against the backs of mine, and the gentle touch almost undid me. “I want that. God help me, I shouldn’t, but I do.”

“Then be with me,” I whispered, my chest tightening when she nodded. “May I kiss you?”

She angled her head and rested her lips against mine. “Yes.”

I closed my mouth over hers, and her hands slid up my arms to wrap around my neck. She parted her lips, and I dipped my tongue into her mouth, tasting her for the first time. It was so goddamn sweet, my cock hardened in an instant.

We started out slow and tender, and our mutual need came to life with every stroke of our tongues. I hadn’t kissed a woman other than Chloe in over ten years, and my veins were instantly ablaze with desire. Estrella tasted new and familiar at the same time.

The kiss quickly became more passionate, her hands twisting in my dark hair. “Estrella, I have to tell you something,” I told her, dread slipping down my spine.

“What?” she asked, leaning back on the couch and pulling me down with her.

“I—I slept with Chloe the night before she left. About three months ago.” She stilled, and the tear that dripped down her soft cheek cut me to the bone. “I’m so sorry. I was drunk, and she walked into my room with a condom, and… I just did it. I’ve never felt worse about anything in my life.”

Her eyes darted away for a long moment before she returned them to mine. “She’s your wife. You have every right to…”

“No, don’t make excuses for me. I had no feelings for her whatsoever, and I’ve felt guilty about it ever since.”

“Because you didn’t want to hurt her?”

A tear dropped from my eye and landed in her hair. “No, Star, because I didn’t want to hurt you . I’d already started developing feelings for you, and even though we hadn’t even discussed it, I felt like I was being disloyal to you.”

Estrella dragged the backs of her fingers down my cheek. “If we’re going to be together, you’ve got to get your drinking under control.”

“I will,” I promised with a resolute nod. “If I have you, I won’t need the liquor to numb me.”

“Make love to me, Paul. Show me you mean what you say.”

And I did.