Chapter 8
In the morning, I reluctantly called Dial, convincing her to drive me to Palmer’s Ranch so I could pick up my car. Enlisting her help came at a price because as she drove, she peppered me with questions.
“What’s your car doing at Palmer’s Ranch?”
“I let Fancy drive it home?” I took a drink of coffee from my insulated tumbler.
“And why couldn’t she drive herself home?”
“Because I was drunk.”
“What does you being drunk have to do with her having your car?”
“She drove it home.”
Dial smooshed me in the head. “If you don’t stop talking in riddles and rhymes I’m going to molly whop you.”
“I’m sorry it’s early. I didn’t get much sleep and I’m slightly hungover.” If I was keeping it one hundred I didn’t want to answer her questions because that would open me up to her judgement. I should’ve just hopped on my bicycle and rode to the Palmer Ranch myself. Sure, I’d be sweaty and tired after, but at least I’d avoid the interrogation from Detective Dial.
“Alright I need you to back up. What exactly were you doing keeping company with Francesca anyway?”
“She showed up with Oz at The Tipsy Owl.”
Dial’s hands tightened over the steering wheel. “Oz was there?”
“Yes ma’am.”
“Did you talk to him?”
“We exchanged pleasantries. He briefly mentioned you.”
Dial flashed me a look letting me know if I uttered another single, solitary word about Oz Palmer she would drive us into the nearest tree. “What did you and Fancy talk about?”
“Dial it’s not even seven in the morning. How do you have the energy for all these inquisitive questions?”
“I just want to understand the circumstances that led me to have to pick up your sorry ass this morning.”
Turning the radio up, I reclined my seat, and pulled my ball cap down over my eyes. Hopefully Dial took the hint. I was pleading the fifth. No more questions. From now on, it was no comment from me.
Dial cut the radio off. “I’m doing you a solid and you have the nerve to try to shut me out.”
“Not shutting you out. I’m just tired.”
“I remember a time when you used to tell me everything.”
“When we were kids? I don’t have an obligation to tell you what’s going on in my life.”
“Is that why you didn’t tell me about Willa?”
“What are you talking about?”
“You had me over here hyping Willa up. Telling you how great she was and this whole time you’ve had her on speed dial for booty calls.”
“Who the fuck told you that?”
“Cy.”
“When did you talk to Cyrus? And why are you two talking about me?”
“What else do we have to talk about but our stupid baby brother?”
“I’m not a baby.”
The corners of Dial’s mouth turned upward. “But you are stupid.” Being the youngest of three had its perks, except when your older siblings teamed up on you. Which Dial and Cyrus often did when we were growing up. They’d say let’s play hide and seek and I’d run off looking for the best spot to conceal myself on the farm. One winter I was in the barn for hours wrapped up in a horse blanket, thinking I was a master hide and seek player because they couldn’t find me. Come to find out those fuckers were never looking for me.
“Did you sleep with her?”
“Willa?”
“No, Fancy?”
I lurched forward, shaking my fist. “Dial, mind your fucking business.”
The tires screeched against the pavement as she abruptly stopped in the middle of the road. “Get out.”
“What?”
“Get out of my car.”
“Dial you’re in the middle of the gotdamn road. This isn’t safe.”
“Well if you get your ass out I can move.”
Inhaling deeply, I hopped out of her car, coffee cup in hand. “You really are a piece of work.” I slammed her passenger door and she took off like a bat out of hell, leaving me in a plume of dust and exhaust fumes. “I’m telling Mom,” I screamed at the top of my lungs.
Should I have blown up at my sister? No. Nevertheless, driving off and leaving me stranded was childish. Trust me if there was anyone else half as reliable as Dial I’d have called them instead. I just wasn’t remotely interested in talking about Fancy with her. My sister acted like I owed her every finite detail of my life. But if I asked one question about hers, she’d knock my block off.
I still didn’t understand what happened between her and Ozzie. One minute they were a thing and the next it was over and she was walking around pretending like everything was fine. The last time she allowed herself to be vulnerable with me was a few months after she had Maple. She came into Figs and Twine while on maternity leave and just cried, and I held her while Maple was asleep in her car seat. When the tears dried up, she left and never mentioned it again. Dial liked to pretend she was invulnerable.
Last night was still etched in my memory. Fancy’s easy, carefree personality. The way she flitted around my house like her presence was an everyday occurrence. I woke up this morning with a rock-hard dick that was begging to be addressed. In the shower I stroked myself, no longer able to ignore the longing. All I could think about was Fancy’s hips grinding against my lap, the softness of her skin, the minty sweet taste of her mouth. I closed my eyes and pretended instead of my rough, calloused hand it was her. That my dick was stroking her cushy, wet, tight pussy. Which was all the motivation I needed to shiver and release, bracing myself against the shower wall, fearful my knees would buckle.
If she hadn’t brought up the existence of a boyfriend, we would’ve fucked. And then what? Fancy had been my religion for years. I’d tried converting to the Temple of Reese, the cathedral of Mari, the church of Willa. But in the end, I’d return to the shrine of Francesca Palmer with offerings and songs of worship. Maybe Dial was right, I was stupid. Fancy was hardwired into my software. Since she’d been gone, I was dating and making new memories to overwrite the old code. Unfortunately, with her return all my desires and hopes were looking to reboot.
Glancing up the road, I searched for any approaching cars, but no vehicles were in sight. It looked like I was going to have to hoof it the last few miles to the ranch. Last night it seemed like a good idea to give Fancy my car and get her out of my house so she couldn’t witness the disappointment all over my face. She had a boyfriend. Possibly ex-boyfriend. Did she return to Hume to get away from him? Liking Fancy was one thing, but I had no intentions of getting caught up in her drama.
I purposely stuck to a select group of friends and excluded myself from gossip, which was everywhere you turned around here. You could be shopping for groceries, and an acquaintance would come up to you and just start spilling every intimate detail about themselves and everyone else. Do I look like I cared about Mr. Baxter cheating on his wife or a former classmate getting busted for a DUI? I minded the business that paid me.
The sun was up but not fully awake, which helped to make the walk bearable. Hume cooled off a bit at night, but with first light you were able to predict the weather and today was going to be another hot one. If Dial needed something heavy moved at the nursery today, she would have to get someone else to do it. Okay, that was a lie. I was still going to move it, but I’d grumble under my breath the entire time. That would be my silent protest, letting her know she couldn’t just treat me any which way. And at next Sunday’s dinner I was going to snitch to our mother and watch with revelry while she chewed Dial out. One of the perks of being the baby of the family.
A familiar black Jeep stopped next to me and the doors unlocked. Dial had circled back and was now staring at me. “Are you getting in or what?” That was the only apology I was getting. Cautiously approaching the vehicle, I climbed back into the passenger seat. The remainder of our drive was silent. We were both stubborn and didn’t want to be the first to say sorry. Entering the Palmer Ranch, Dial stopped in front of the main house and shifted the car into park.
“Thank you for the ride.”
“Uh-hmm.”
Turning to face her, I said, “Dial?”
“I just don’t want you getting hurt Eddy.”
“Fancy’s never hurt me.”
“She ignored you. She kept you close because you were a good friend, and she knew you liked her. And she used it to her advantage. In a pinch, call Edison because he’ll wake up in the middle of the night, drive to some party he wasn’t invited to and courier her home like a fucking RideX. He’ll score her weed, or change her oil, or listen while she laments about the dude who’s fucking her dizzy.”
“I chose to be there for her. That’s not on Fancy, that’s on me.”
“She’s a user. She used you back then and she’s probably using you right now.”
“Are you done?”
“Are you listening?”
“Dial, I appreciate the concern, but I’m grown.”
“Grown people get their hearts broken every day,” she warned me.
“Good morning.” A cheery voice came from the passenger side of the Jeep, making us both jump.
“Hey you’re up?” I said.
“I figured you’d come looking for your truck,” Fancy said, leaning into the window. “Hey Dial, how have you been?”
“Fine, yourself?” Dial didn’t even bother to meet her eyes.
“No worse for wear, I suppose.”
My sister just stared straight ahead, making everything awkward.
I turned to Dial. “See you back at the nursery.”
“Yep.”
I jumped out and Dial sped off, turning onto the dusty unpaved road.
“Nice to see Dial is still as friendly as ever.”
“She’s just tired.”
“We both know I’m not her favorite person.”
I shrugged Fancy’s words off. “She hates everybody, really?”
Fancy’s face drooped. “She hates me? I get I wasn’t her cup of tea … but hate?”
“Hates a strong word. She doesn’t hate you.”
“You just said she did.”
“She doesn’t wish you any ill will. She just doesn’t fuck with you.”
“I will never understand what I did to offend her?”
“It’s complicated.” I wasn’t looking to explain that my sister detested her because she labeled Fancy as a selfish bitch. I tagged her arm. “Look, I just wanted to apologize for last night.”
“We were both drunk. It’s fine. Just a little kissing between friends.”
“Good because I thought I’d get here and you’d be all stage five clingy and profess your love or some shit like that,” I joked.
“You’re a good kisser but you ain’t that good.” She was dressed in an oversized T-shirt. If she had something on underneath, I couldn’t call it. Her purple hair was piled on top of her head with random curls spilling loose from her silk patterned headscarf.
“What do you have planned for the day?”
“Sleep, but knowing my dad, he’ll drag me out there with him to water the horses and cows.”
“Country living, gotta love it.”
She set her hand on her hips. “You know what I miss most?”
“What?”
“The smell.”
My face crumpled and I wrinkled my nose.
“I know it’s crazy but the smell of hay, wet dirt, and shit. Reminds me of home.”
“We might need to get that on a billboard. Hume … hay, dirt, and shit. Ain’t nothing like it.”
“Maybe I’ll write a song about it.”
“I’m sure it would be a number one hit.”
“The keys are on the dash.” She pointed to my truck parked on the side of the house.
“Thanks.” I turned to leave before stopping short. “Hey, what are you doing tonight?”
Her shoulders twitched. “Right now, I’m just kind of going where the wind takes me.”
“Cool, so let’s see where the wind takes us tonight.”
“Okay.” She smiled and it was like the sun rising.
“I’ll pick you up at eight.”
“I’ll make myself pretty for you.”
My dick flexed in my jeans. This was exactly what Dial was concerned about. The subtle tease that kept me dangling on the line until I was out of oxygen.
Figs and Twine was located on the outskirts of town and occasionally we’d have to head to the main square for supplies. I offered to run errands today because I wanted to avoid Dial who was still giving me the cold shoulder even after our talk in the car. After picking up the office supplies, I made a pit stop at the mayor’s storefront office.
A bell attached to the door chimed, announcing my entrance. “Hi Presley.”
Cyrus’s secretary perked up. “Edison, what brings you to this side of town?”
“Errands.”
“Did you get anything for me?” She flipped her box braids with a smile.
Hmm? Presley and I went on a handful of dates, never making it out of the talking stage. “No, but next time. Is Cy here?”
“Yeah he is. I’ll buzz him.”
“You don’t have to do that. I can literally see him in his office from here. Cyrus!” I shouted because I loved embarrassing him.
The phone on Presley’s desk rang and she answered. “Hello? Yes, I understand.”
When she hung up the phone and addressed me, her tone was professional. I was no longer the guy who felt her up in the backseat of my car our junior year. “Mayor Birch will be with you shortly. Please feel free to sit. Do you want a coffee or water?”
I looked toward Cy’s office. “Nah, I’m good.” Advancing forward, I passed Presley’s desk and several others and opened Cyrus’ door. “You were going to have me wait in the lobby?”
“Excuse you. This is a government building.” Cyrus’ words forced me to suppress my laughter. “I could have you trespassed.”
“And I could go outside and key your car, but we both know neither of those things are about to happen. What are you doing?” I closed his office door.
“I’m working.”
“No, you’re not.” Taking a seat, I picked through his candy bowl.
“I’m literally working right now.” Cy grabbed a stack of papers which were probably all blank.
“Well that can’t be true because you’re talking to me.”
“What the hell are you doing here anyway? Shouldn’t you be at the store?”
“I needed to pick up some stuff for the shop. Snacks for the break-room, coffee pods, markers.”
“Mom and Dad hand you the keys to the kingdom and you become a glorified errand boy?”
“No, I needed to put some space between me and Dial.”
“What did Dial do?”
“You know our sister. She always finds ways to insert herself.”
“Did she mention I saw your girl at the Dairy Queen talking close with a fella that was not you?”
If he was talking about Fancy I was going to crash out. “Who’s my girl?”
“Don’t act like you haven’t been spending time with Willa. Worst kept secret in Hume.”
“Well if everyone knows I guess it’s a good thing we called it quits.”
Cyrus’s face became twisted. “Damn, she dumped you?”
“No, we mutually agreed to move on.”
“Sure you did.” He winked at me.
“We wanted different things.”
“Are you dumb?”
“What do you mean?”
“You’re not going to do better than Willa. Not in Hume anyway.”
“I disagree.”
“So you just woke up and decided to implode your life.” Cy signed some document as if people in this town cared about his approval.
“If you like Willa so much, you date her.”
“Shit, she’s too much work.”
“But it’s okay for me to do the heavy lifting?”
“Willa needs a man who’s going to let her decorate their home in pink and ribbons and just be happy she knows his name.”
“And you think I fill that description?”
“How can I put this delicately? You’re a bit of a pushover.”
“Me?”
“I didn’t stutter motherfucker.”
Who needed enemies when you had siblings?
“I’m not a pushover. I just don’t like rocking boats.”
“You can’t make an everything scramble without breaking a few eggs.”
“I prefer hash browns and sausage.”
Cy shuffled papers into a folder and finally gave me his full attention. “Dial told me you ran into Francesca Palmer at the nursery the other day.”
I timidly confirmed his words. “Yeah.” I was still raw from Dial cussing me out. I was hoping Cyrus would offer a counter message.
“Eddy, what are you doing?”
“What do you mean?”
“Fancy’s a nice girl. I understand why you had a crush on her all through high school.”
“But, because your tone is definitely giving a pending but.”
“Unrequited crushes are supposed to eventually crumble.”
“We’re friends.
“Hmm.”
“I thought you liked Fancy.”
“I do. I just think you get a little loopy when she’s around. Her moving was probably the best thing to happen to you. You went to college, you learned what life was like outside of Hume. You had a fucking girlfriend.”
“It’s funny you and Dial are notorious for doling out relationship advice while not being in a relationship.”
“Being mayor, I know all and see all like the great and powerful Oz.”
“You do know in that story he was a fake … phony … grifter.”
He twirled his pen. “We’re all faking it in one way or the other.”
“Maybe we’re cursed.”
“How so?
“You, me, and Dial … perpetually single.”
“It’s because of Mom and Dad.”
My head jerked back. “What the fuck are you talking about?”
“Kiddo, you’ve got to take off those rose-colored glasses.”
“I’m not following.”
“Edison, I love that for you. I really do.” Cyrus acted like we grew up in different households. I understood the theory of siblings having different experiences and relationships with their parents even when all the kids grew up together, but Cy’s reality was so removed from mine. “What’s Fancy doing in town?”
“Just visiting.”
“For how long? Cause I’d love to get her in some ads for the town. Plaster her face on a billboard that says home of Francesca Palmer of Whiskey Wild. Is Darla here? We need to get her in on this too.”
“Funny enough she was pitching me an interesting billboard idea this morning,” I joked.
“This morning? Okay, I see you player.”
“It’s not like that.”
“Does that have anything to do with why Dial is mad at you?”
“I’m sure she’ll tell you all about it during your sibling chat I’m not included in.”
“If you were included, we wouldn’t be able to make fun of you.”
“Shit I don’t even know why I came here because you’re never any help.”
“You want help, shoot. I’m the mayor of Hume and I’m here to solve my constituent’s problems.”
“I asked Fancy out. Not a date just a hangout.” A twinge of guilt washed over me at my admission.
“You need to keep your expectations low. Like the prices at Bargain Bin low.”
“I’ve mastered that. Low expectations equals minimum disappointment.”
“Good and whatever you do, don’t sleep with her.”
Casting a glance at his décor, I asked, “Did you do something different to your office?”
“I’m serious.”
“Never said I was going to do anything. I’m just making conversation.”
“You’re damn right you’re not. Because if you do, she’ll still run back to LA at the first opportunity.”
“I think you’re underestimating the power of my dick, but I hear you.”
“Is that why Willa dumped you?”
Rolling my eyes, I shouted, “She didn’t dump?—”
“An idiot says what?”
“What?” Ugh, why did I always fall for that?