Chapter 25
Twenty-five
HOPE
“Oh, stop pouting, Jax,” I scold as he stares at the mark I gave Dimitri. I can’t believe I did that. I carved my initial into his chest. The same spot their initials mark my skin. I claimed him as mine, and somehow… deep down… I feel proud of it.
Perhaps I’ve finally found my place in the world, my home. With my monsters.
“Come on,” Jaxon whimpers as he holds the knife in his hand. “Do me next, please, sweetheart.”
“Oh, I believe someone is jealous he didn’t get picked first for once,” Dimitri taunts and Jaxon narrows his eyes at him.
My lips are curved in a smile, one that hasn’t wavered since I took the step to claim my man.
“Sweetheart,” Knox whispers as Dimitri and Jaxon keep up with their banter.
I crawl closer to Knox and snuggle against him on the couch. “Do they ever stop?” I ask.
Knox chuckles. “Fighting about you? Never.”
I roll my eyes. “I don’t want them to fight about me.”
“Don’t worry about it, Hope. None of us will ever leave you,” he whispers and I peek up at him.
“Promise,” I whisper back and a soft smile forms on his lips.
“I promise,” he murmurs and gently claims my lips.
The kiss is soft, sweet, and all my thoughts fade into nothing as all I can think about is how good his lips feel on mine.
I lean closer but he breaks our kiss.
“You’ve done so great tonight, sweetheart,” he says and runs his fingers through my hair. “You’re the strongest person I know.”
I blink away the sting in my eyes. “I have to be… I have to be strong otherwise…”
“I know.” He gives me a small peck on my lips. “I’m proud of you, Hope.”
My throat closes, the prick in my eyes rises, and I try to hold myself together. “I-I…”
“It’s okay,” he whispers and shifts me slightly so I can rest my head on his chest.
“I don’t want to sleep,” I say.
“Me either,” he answers and his fingertips trail over my bare arm. “But… we should get some rest before we head to the cabin.”
“We’re really doing this?” I ask.
“We have to, Hope.” He sighs. “They won’t stop until we stop them.”
But how will we stop them. Ask nicely? Rough them up?
I peek down at my fingers and I know what kind of ending we’ll have.
Blood soaked.
KNOX
I couldn’t sleep, I couldn’t take my mind off what’s going to happen.
Hope’s sprawled on top of me, asleep. I’ve lost track of time, but the darkness outside is faltering.
“We should go,” Jaxon’s voice cuts through the living room and my brows draw together.
“You sleep?” I ask and he chuckles.
“We’ll sleep when we’re dead,” he says and nudges Dimitri to wake up.
I nod once and gently tap Hope’s shoulder. She stirs, then groans when I move her. “No,” she whispers, but I run my thumb along her jaw until her lashes flutter open. “Time to move, sweetheart,” I murmur.
Jaxon is on his phone and a deep sigh follows. “It’s the cabin. They got it narrowed down. Dimitri.” Jaxon nudges Dimitri again. “Can you check it?”
“Not trusting it?” I ask and Jaxon shakes his head.
“The only people I trust are right here,” he snaps and slides his phone in his back pocket before heading into our bedroom.
Dimitri groans and gets up to grab his laptop. He rubs his eyes as the screen lights up and I can’t look away. Not as he types, mumbles under his breath. Only when he freezes do I know the answer.
“We’re really going back there, huh?” I scoff.
“Seems like it,” Dimitri says and slams the laptop shut. “Definitely a trap.” He shakes his head and his eyes find Hope.
“We’ll be fine,” he says and bends down to kiss half-asleep Hope. “We’ll be fine,” he whispers again.
Hope whimpers and shifts. But as Dimitri pulls back, she snatches his shoulder and pulls him back. “Good morning,” she whispers and gives him a soft kiss.
“She’s doing better,” Jaxon grumbles and I flinch.
“Jeezus, make a sound or something.”
“You were just too busy staring to notice me,” he teases. “Didn’t know you were so into watching.”
“Jaxon, please, not now,” I say and run my hands over my face.
“What? You know I don’t kink-shame,” he says with a shrug.
“Please, it’s too early for this,” I mutter and turn away, starting to get dressed.
I feel Hope’s eyes on me, and I glance back to see she’s smiling, head tilted.
I let myself look a few seconds longer than usual.
She looks better. Lighter. Even with the day ahead of us, she’s not crumpling or shaking.
“Let’s go, monsters. Time to hunt,” Jaxon says and pulls Hope off the couch. She sways for a second, then finds her balance and grabs the clothes Dimitri got her.
Silence follows and we all grab everything we need. Some food, extra clothes. Everything stuffed in Jaxon’s old duffel bag. Dimitri packs his backpack, some cords, his laptop.
Hope smiles slightly as she puts her knuckle buster and pocketknife in her back pocket.
“I got her that, you know,” Jaxon says with a hint of proudness.
“Perfect gift,” I joke.
“Hundred precent,” Jaxon says and I just shake my head.
Dimitri catches my eyes as he glides the gun he snatched from his dad into the back of his jeans.
There’s no going back now. Whatever happens will happen. As long as she is safe.
I grab my jacket and the car keys and wait by the door. I don’t want to rush them, I want to take this moment in. The calm before the storm.
She silently touches them as they walk past each other. The secret smiles. A moment of peace we haven’t had before, not like this.
Maybe it is because we know today, it can all end.
Forever.
Those thoughts stay with me when we get into the car, when I drive off and leave our home behind to finish what we started.
Jaxon is trying to keep the tension light, and Dimitri is back to his brooding self.
Hope’s fingers lace through mine and she gives me a gentle squeeze.
“Definitely better sitting in the front seat,” she says.
“Oh, don’t say that,” Jaxon whines. “You like being sandwiched between us.”
I roll my eyes and bring Hope’s hand to my lips. “My girl,” I whisper against her skin and press my lips on her knuckles.
“I want to drive next, swap with me, Knox,” Jaxon says, earning a nudge from Dimitri.
“Behave for—” Dimitri get cuts off when his phone rings. His dad’s name pops up on the dashboard and I glance back at Dimitri through the rearview mirror.
“Answer it,” Dimitri says and his dad’s voice cuts through the speakers.
“Turn around!”
“Tracking my phone, are we?” Dimitri calls back.
“Son, turn around. Now,” his dad grits.
“Are you taking care of the problem? Are you stepping up for once?” Dimitri asks and I hear the sharp sigh that comes from his dad.
“They’ll be waiting for you… just… stay away. Listen for once.”
Dimitri scoffs. “Oh, Dad, careful now, don’t want me to think you actually care.”
“I can’t help you, I—”
“When did you ever help?” Dimitri cuts him off and disconnects the call.
We all stay silent, waiting for Dimitri to say something. Anything.
“Turn up the music,” Dimitri says and huffs.
Hope shifts in her seat, turns on the radio to drown us, and I speed up.
We won’t go back. We can’t. No more hiding. No more pretending we aren’t a fucked-up bunch.
This is either our end or beginning.
The sun is barely up by the time we reach the edge of the old forest.
Jaxon is out of the car before I finish parking, popping the trunk and pulling out a battered duffel.
Dimitri shrugs on his backpack and checks for the gun in the waistband of his jeans.
Hope is the last to leave the car, pausing with her hand on the door handle before stepping out, drawing in one slow breath.
“We stay off the paths,” I say and lead the way. They know we’re coming but we shouldn’t make it too easy for them.
Jaxon stalks right behind me, eyes hard and wild, checking each tree like he expects something to step out and challenge him. Hope follows in my shadow, silent, but I see the fear darkening her eyes. Dimitri walks beside her, his hand on the gun.
We shouldn’t have brought her, but we had no choice. It was hers.
We hit the clearing and the cabin comes into sight. The front door hangs on one hinge. Police tape hangs loose. Jaxon slows, and for a second, I think he’s going to say something brave or reckless, but he just stops, head cocked, listening.
That’s when I hear it: a voice, faint, female.
I glance at Hope. Her face has gone white, every muscle in her body locked tight.
“Do you guys hear that?” she whispers.
She doesn’t have to say it twice. We all freeze.
“Please don’t! Please don’t! Please… no, no, no…”
My heart stammers in my chest and I grab Hope, pulling her behind me. We all listen in.
“It’s a loop,” Dimitri mumbles.
“Please don’t!”
Jaxon shifts on his feet as the words become clearer and Hope covers her mouth with her hand.
“Who the fuck is that?” I hiss and I see the blood drain from Jaxon’s face and Hope’s eyes squeeze shut.
“Jaxon, who is it?” Dimitri asks and grabs Jaxon’s shoulder.
“Please… please… I’ll be good, I promise, I’ll be—”
JAXON
Her…
Why does it have to be her?
“Jax!” Knox hisses.
Hope grips my wrist so tightly, I feel her nails, then her fingers lace through mine. I squeeze, and can hear one of her fingers pop, but I can’t make myself let go. Something breaks in me, fractures just like my spine probably should have.
“Daisy.” It’s supposed to be a scream, but it’s a pathetic whine. “Fuck, why… why is it…?”
“I’m right here,” Hope whispers.
But Daisy’s voice is louder, louder, softer, louder, softer, every plea, every whimpered “no” like she knows it won’t do anything, it’s just something to fill the silence.
I’ve never known what he did to her. How he destroyed her. I’ve known some, just… not early enough. Not enough. I was never enough. Never good enough. Strong enough. Fast enough.
Goosebumps spread over my skin, making me shake.
My throat tightens. I can’t breathe. I can’t fucking breathe.
I need to hurt something, need to rip into myself.
I need to ruin anything and everything that could be a problem, but my body is jelly, can’t do a damn thing other than melt to the ground.
I grip a tree root so tightly it splinters in my hand while Knox, Dimitri, and Hope talk to one another. I don’t care what they’re saying. It doesn’t matter. I don’t recognize Daisy screaming like that, her pleading to make it stop, to be gentle, to stop. To stop.
“I’m right here,” Hope whispers in my ear. “I’m not going anywhere, Jax. The guys are going to take a look. We’re staying here. You’re mine and I’m yours. We’re good. We’re going to be good.”
I’m panting, wheezing, and I clutch my chest.
I don’t know if it’s possible for me to believe in “good” anymore. Not when closing my eyes means imagining Daisy go through something I wasn’t there to protect her from. Not if opening my eyes means not seeing Daisy because she’s dead and her last moments were this terrible.
“There’s no good.” I couldn’t protect her, I couldn’t protect anyone. I’m weak. Worthless.
“There is, even if you can only hear the worst right now,” Hope says.
I can’t. It should’ve been me; Daisy is supposed to be alive.
Then Hope takes my face between her hands, her palms covering my ears as she stares into my eyes. I hear my own heart thudding, my blood boiling in my veins. But there’s Hope. Her gorgeous blue eyes… like Daisy’s. So much like Daisy. Why couldn’t Daisy be stronger? Why couldn’t I be stronger?
“It’s us, Jax,” she insists and opens her jacket, pulls down her shirt. “Us.”
My eyes dip to where our initials are carved into her flesh. I remember that night with her. How she cried, how she begged, when she tried to say no before just giving in, moaning, closing her eyes, and only opening them now and again.
“I deserve hell. I’m in hell. I deserve hell. Couldn’t help her. Broke you. Hell. Hell…” I breathe again and again.