Chapter 14
FOURTEEN
KASH
Twila brushed the neon eyeshadow across my lids before she gently blew the excess away.
We had both felt this immense sense of relief since I told her everything the night before.
It was as if we really truly saw each other for who we really were.
It was a sense of safety and support I had never experienced before, aside from Motley.
Twila picked up a small vial of glitter and dabbed her finger into it before tapping it across my cheekbones.
Something about her was different. I wasn’t sure if it was the new freeness between us or the way she was dressed, but she was…
glowing. A beautiful goddess. God, I loved her.
Twila tilted her head and smiled at me. “What’re you thinking about?”
I felt bashful. “Just how beautiful you are.” Twila’s cheeks burned almost as red as her lips. A deep sense of guilt twisted in my gut. She had no idea, none of them did, but tonight would change everything. Forever.
Twila stood, and I grabbed her hand. “Thank you.”
“For what?” she asked.
My smile grew. “For being my safe place. For accepting me. Everything.” I kissed her hand. “I love you, Twila.”
Twila tilted her head again, and her eyes watered. “I love you too, baby.” I watched her eyes move as the sound of the dressing room door opened. She flashed a bright grin at whoever it was as they walked closer. She was definitely glowing.
“Am I interrupting?” I should've known it was Motley.
Twila shook her head as her blonde hair bounced around her face.
She then kissed my head and whispered into my ear.
“Remember what I said last night? Now is your chance. Be free, baby.” She turned to face Motley.
He smiled back, and the two hugged. There was a new layer of familiarity between us all now, this connection and pull we’d all felt since that night.
It was oddly comforting. “Go easy on him, okay?” Twila kissed Motley’s cheek and exited the dressing room.
The two of us sat there in an awkward silence, waiting for the other to speak.
You could hear the crowd in the distance as they chanted and waited for the band to step out on stage, and I knew we didn’t have much time left.
So, I took a deep breath and decided to do what Twila said and stop running.
It was time for me to open myself up and face the music.
I ran my fingers through my hair. “I’m sorry for standing you up last night, Motley.” He crossed his arms and didn’t speak. Great, the silent treatment. “I know it looks bad, but I promise it’s not. Twila and I were just?—”
“Twila?” Motley scoffed. “Kash, do I need to be worried about her? I mean, are you wanting to be with her over me?” I could hear the pained fear in his defensive voice.
“No!” Fuck. “Motley, that’s—that’s not what I meant!” I shot from the chair and rushed to him. “Twila found me last night, and we just talked. That’s it! There’s nothing going on between us, Motley. You know that.”
Motley shook his head. “I don’t know, Kash.
You’ve been acting off these past couple days and every time I turn around, you're with her. You say you two broke up, but it’s not really feeling that way.
And I don’t like being used. If I’m just a plaything to you, then be a man and fucking say it.
Stop playing games with me.” Motley turned to leave, but I grabbed his arm.
He tried to brush me off, but I was too stubborn.
Too determined to set things right before it was too late.
I needed to clear the air and fix things with him now.
It was my last chance, and I wasn’t going to lose him over something so fucking stupid.
As Motley tried to leave, I gripped his arm and spun him to face me.
His blue eyes burned into mine, his stage makeup making them pop against his darker skin tone and orange hair.
God, he was so fucking beautiful. I wanted to burn this image of him into my mind to look back on and never forget what it felt like to gaze up at a god.
Motley eyed me closely as I placed my hands around his face and held him still. “What’re you doing?” he asked, and I could hear a faint gasp escape his lips. “Why?”
I gently stroked his cheek. “I never want to forget you, Motley.”
A loud bang hit the dressing room door, and we both jumped as it was quickly followed by a random voice. “Two minutes until showtime!”
Fuck. I was almost out of time. It was now or never.
Motley delicately grabbed my wrists and removed my hands.
“What’s really going on, Kash? Why did Ducky pull you aside yesterday?
Why didn’t you come back to our room? And why have you been running around with Twila if there’s nothing going on between you two?
” I suddenly had the urge to kiss him. To pull him into my arms and just hold him tight and never let him go.
“Kash.” Motley stepped closer, and I nearly lost my breath.
“Please tell me what’s going on?” His warm hand cradled my face.
I closed my eyes and leaned into his touch as I inhaled his scent.
I never want to forget this.
I opened my eyes and glanced up at him. “I spoke to that cop again. With Ducky.” Motley gasped.
“Don’t worry.” I placed my hand over his as my fingertips grazed his skin.
“I took care of everything. You’re safe, Motley.
” My eyes stared into his, those two vibrant pools of sapphire, while they watched me.
So fucking beautiful. “You hear me? You’re safe.
You’re never going back there, Motley. I promise. I took care of everything”
“I have so many questions… But Kash, how?” Motley was too stunned to speak.
I smiled. “It was something Twila said to me. Unknowingly, she told me what I needed to do to save you. And I did it. So, no more worrying about that night or being caught. No more looking over your shoulder or living in fear. You’re safe, Motley.
And now, it’s time you start living your life however you want. ”
Motley yanked me close to him, and our bodies slammed together. His breath hit my face, and I had to remind myself to breathe. “What does any of that even mean, songbird?”
I reached up and tugged at a stray curl that hung down across his face. “It means you’re free, drummer boy.”
“No. We’re free.” Motley leaned close and kissed me with such passion. I wanted to correct him, but I couldn’t. This moment was too perfect, and he would learn the truth soon enough. I just wanted to live in this moment a little longer. Just a little longer.
Not we. Only you.
Another loud bang hit the dressing room door as the same person from before shouted to us. “Time’s up!”
Motley and I reluctantly pulled away from one another and tried to compose ourselves. He leaned past me and fixed his curls in the mirror. “You ready for tonight’s show, songbird?” he asked.
I turned to look back at him. “It’s going to be one hell of a show to remember.”
Trust me.
I moved past Motley and pulled a tiny bag of cocaine from my jeans. He made a face as I tapped a small amount onto the vanity, but I didn’t care. “Kash,” he groaned.
I used my license to make a thin line and then rolled a dollar bill before I snorted it. “Trust me.” I coughed. My nose and throat burned. I couldn’t stop sniffing and wiping my nose. “After tonight, you’re going to wish you’d done the same.”
Stage lights roamed across the stage as Motley’s foot tapped the pedal of his bass drum.
He led the crowd as Carmen, Twila, and I clapped our hands along to the beat with them.
The stage was buzzy and booming with energy, and by the looks of everyone on stage, they felt it too.
It was another showstopping performance where we’d given our all.
My head turned, and I noticed Ducky speaking to a stagehand.
They seemed to be reacting to something, and I had a feeling I knew what it was.
I spun around and signaled to Carmen. She danced to center stage, and a purple spotlight followed her.
She shook her curly dark hair, raised an arm high, and shouted into the microphone.
“Rock and roll, baby!” The crowd shouted, and she began to play a solo on her bass guitar.
Motley held a basic beat, but Carmen stole the spotlight.
I watched her with pride while slowly making my way to Ducky. “Hey! Everything okay?” Ducky raised his hands at the stagehand as the two seemed to argue. “Ducky!”
He snapped his head and ran over to me. “Get your ass back on stage!”
“Is everything okay?” I asked.
Ducky shook his head and leaned close. He shouted into my ear over the music. “The police are here! I-I don’t know what’s going on, but they claim they have a warrant!” I pulled back and stared at him. “I’ll take care of it! You just go back out there and finish your performance!”
“No!” Ducky looked at me in shock. “Let them in!”
“Kash—”
I smacked his arm and winked. “Everything is going to be okay, Ducky! I promise!” I then bolted back on stage and over to Twila. She flashed me a smile while she clapped to Carmen’s solo. “Join her!”
Twila pressed her brows together. “Are you sure?”
I nodded and snapped my fingers at Carmen.
She turned around, and I pointed to Twila before gently pushing her forward.
Carmen’s grin grew, and she stepped back as Twila joined her with her guitar.
The two women played, and I approached the microphone.
“Who wants to hear some more?” The crowd cheered, and the entire stage rippled with a new wave of energy.
“Alright! Hit it, Motley!” I swung my arm over and pointed to the drummer.
A blue spotlight ignited above him, and he went crazy.
Twila and Carmen held a simple background tune, and Motley carried the whole show.