CHAPTER 18
“Make sure you groom him properly after he cools down.” Matt advised the stable-hand as he dismounted the horse.
“Yes, sir.”
“And tomorrow I want the two mares transported to my father’s stable as early as possible.”
“Yes, sir.” the man said as he took the reins from Matt.
With a curt nod, Matt strode off towards the path that would lead to the house.
He had enjoyed his afternoon ride immensely, it had provided a much needed distraction from his thoughts.
Shame it was only fleeting.
His traitorous wife was never far from his mind, and he hated that fact.
The twenty minutes brisk walk from the stables to the house of his Surrey estate was one of further self-reflection, unexpectedly interrupted when he spotted an unknown car parked next to his.
Feeling his annoyance swell, he stalked up to the front double doors and entered his home.
“Amelia,” he called loudly in the foyer.
“Who in the bloody hell is parked on my drive?”
The matronly woman who ran his Surrey staff came hurrying towards him.
“You have a guest-”
“I gathered that,” he cut her off impatiently.
“Who is it?”
“Ms Gilliford, sir.” she paused at his irritated grunt, then forged on.
“I did advise her you were out on your afternoon ride but she insisted on waiting. I’ve put her in the back salon.”
Matt wiped a hand over his face, grimacing slightly at the perspiration beading on his forehead.
“Notify her I’ll be there shortly, I need to clean up.”
With that instruction he headed upstairs, grumbling under his breath.
He had been holed up here for the last three weeks.
Working out of his home office and avoiding any form of social interaction.
Ever since he had informed his family of the breakdown of his marriage, which had garnered mixed responses, he needed seclusion.
The twins were distraught and demanded to know what he had done.
His siblings asked if they were planning on working things out.
His parents and Grumps had fired countless probing questions at him.
Matt had warned with harsh emphasis that he was not discussing it any further, they stopped asking after that.
It didn’t help the media had also found out about the separation between him and Madi, but his investigator was working on the leak and a name had been promised to him by the end of today.
He entered the master bedroom and went straight to the en-suite, where he stripped off his clothing and got into the shower.
The hot spray of water was almost cathartic, until he reached over for some soap and his hand closed over the bottle that was her brand.
Biting back expletives, Matt flung it aside and reached for his own.
How had he missed it?
There was no escape from her.
It was embarrassing to admit to himself but he felt as if his beloved London had turned against him, it seemed everywhere he turned there was a billboard with her striking face staring out at him.
Bloody soap!
He would ensure his staff removed every reminder of his traitorous wife at this property also.
An image of the latest picture in the gossip rags flashed before his eyes.
The little insets focused on their ring fingers, both bare, both an undeniable fact things weren’t right.
“Tossers.” he muttered, vigorously lathering his body up.
Matt paused over his semi-hard cock, even thinking of her in anger his body still reacted.
The nights were the worst.
He would reach out for her in his sleep, find an empty space next to him then jerk into wakefulness.
Those first few seconds were always filled with frightful alarm at her absence, before he remembered.
She didn’t share his bed anymore.
She never would again.
God.
He fucking missed her.
That cheeky smile of hers, the way she would hum tunelessly while cooking, or unconsciously dance while doing the most mundane things.
He bloody missed the scent of her on his pillow, the taste of her on his lips, the way they made love - Matt let out a frustrated groan.
He had gone from semi-hard to painfully rigid.
Ignoring the state of his manhood, he hastened to finish his shower.
Once dressed, he fixed a pleasant smile on his face and sought out his unexpected guest.
“Louisa,” Matt greeted on entering the sunlit room.
“This is a surprise.”
She rose gracefully from where she was seated, a bright smile on her face as she sauntered towards him.
“Matt,” She pressed a light kiss to his cheek.
“How are you, darling?”
Matt maintained his faux smile and noted the empty glass at the side table where she had been seated.
“Fine, and you?”
“Are you really?” She ignored his query into her wellbeing.
Matt cocked his head to the side, eyebrows raised as he regarded her silently.
“You failed to show for your own birthday celebration,” Louisa continued wryly.
“Your mother was upset.”
He shrugged before walking over to the fully stocked drinks cabinet.
“I did warn her I wasn’t in the mood for a big do, it’s not my fault she refused to listen. Another drink for you?”
“Please.” Louisa confirmed.
Matt went about fixing their drinks, glancing at the blonde beauty ever so often.
“So,” he prompted when he handed her a fresh glass.
“I assume there is some particular reason for your visit.”
“Does there have to be?” Louisa shot back coyly.
He sipped his drink and gave her a nonchalant shrug.
“There’s always a purpose when it concerns you, Louisa.”
She waved a dismissive hand through the air before wandering over to the large windows.
“I simply wanted to see you. Is that wrong of me? To be concerned over your welfare? We were such close friends, darling.”
Matt chuckled.
“Friends? Is that what you call it?”
Louisa spun around, her vibrant red lips tightened.
“Are you going to be difficult, Matt?”
Again he chuckled.
“No, Louisa. Not difficult, merely curious as to why you’re here. The last time you visited me unannounced you were the bearer of quite distasteful news. Forgive me for being,” Matt paused as his mouth curled up derisively.
“Somewhat wary of what you might have to say.”
She tossed her drink back and sauntered over to him.
The light material of her striped summer’s dress was clinging attractively to her form.
Matt observed her closely as she approached and held out her glass.
“Another?” he asked dryly.
“Please,” she murmured.
“Should you really? Considering you will be driving home.” Matt took the now empty glass from her.
“And you won’t want to risk getting a ticket, now will you?”
“Will I?” Louisa asked while stepping into his personal space and resting a hand on his chest.
“Will you what?”
She leaned into him, then pressed her mouth over his, tongue darting out to trace his lips.
For a few seconds Matt remained unresponsive, before he moved his mouth against hers.
Louisa moaned softly as they kissed, both her hands were now travelling the contours of his t-shirt clad chest.
It was pleasant, and suddenly familiar.
Another form of distraction from his dark thoughts, but frustratingly unsatisfying.
Matt deepened the kiss as his mind automatically began drawing comparisons.
Her lips weren’t as plump-
“Mmm,” Louisa broke the connection of their lips to press soft kisses across his jawline.
“Will I be driving home?” Her voice was laced with lust as her hands travelled lower, coming to a stop at the waistband of his jeans.
Matt cleared his throat and stepped back.
“Yes, you will.”
Louisa’s eyes widened, shocked at his reply.
“But-”
“Louisa,” Matt chided gently while going over to place the glasses on the cabinet’s surface.
“I am still a married man.” His features hardened.
“And contrary to the behaviour of my licentious spouse, I don’t intend on practising infidelity while constrained by the bonds of marriage.”
She pouted and folded her arms as she shook her head in disbelief.
“Why on earth are you showing her loyalty when she didn’t have the decency to return that favour?”
Matt shrugged, unable to figure it out himself.
Why hadn’t he already drowned his sorrows and sexual frustration in the arms of another woman?
Finding a willing bed-mate wouldn’t be hard.
He cast a speculative gaze over Louisa.
She was the perfect example.
Offering certain physical satisfaction from the hungry urges of his male needs.
Why wasn’t he right now taking her upstairs where he could shag his frustrations away?
At least for a few hours.
Why wasn’t he already buried to the hilt inside this woman who so blatantly desired him?
“I don’t understand,” Louisa continued, both exasperated and unhappy.
“How can you turn me down? She cheated on you. Why can’t we resume our previous relationship?”
Matt stared at her.
She really was quite stunning.
Her words replayed themselves in his head.
Louisa, noting his intense gaze, smiled at him as she closed the distance between them.
“Tell me, Matt. Why are you still loyal to her when she doesn’t deserve it?”
Matt slowly licked his lips as she ran her hands up his arms.
Why indeed?
“It’s broken, isn’t it?” Dante asked with agitation.
He was starting to sweat.
“Hell if I know,” I replied breathlessly.
We were in the wings, about to go on for the penultimate act and the second toe of my right foot felt as if it were broken.
“Fuck.” Dante whispered, barely stopping himself from wiping a hand across his face in frustration and messing up his makeup.
“You still have your fouettes pirouette in the final act to do, and this act you’re en pointe for most of it. Goddamnit!”
“Found the tape,” Bri ran up with a triumphant look on her face.
She waved the surgical tape under my nose as Dante quickly untied my right pointe shoe before tugging it off.
Bri then unfurled her other hand.
“And some strong painkillers. Take them now.”
“Mama loves you, baby girl.” I winked at her and took the pills.
Then a little hiss escaped me when Dante began to tape my toes up.
A quick dry-swallow with a silent pray, and I was ready to claim my stage once more.
Everything I had dreamt about since moving to England; the big stage, the lights, the beautiful faces of the crowd staring at me in wonder…
it was happening.
We were performing at the world renowned Royal Opera House, had been for the past week and a half.
It was pure magic, it was the only way to describe it.
The people who worked here were professional but so welcoming.
My fears that the dancers who belonged to The Royal Ballet would look down their noses at us while we temporarily inhabited their world were unfounded.
Everyone was supportive.
My people exceled in these conditions, I exceled in these conditions.
Hand to heart, it was the best I had ever danced.
“Two minutes until curtains,” A voice warned.
We all groaned then chuckled.
Would we change it?
Never.
Dancers were a special breed.
We were special, and the glowing reviews our show had garnered only reaffirmed I had found my calling in life.
Forget the late onset of and the sometimes irregular periods for us girls, or the lack of big beautiful boobies, forget the possibility of being crippled by the time we hit our forties, forget the unavoidable doom of early arthritis in the hips and ankles…
hell in almost every joint, ignore the secret terrifying fear we all knew we would face of ‘what will I do once I can’t dance on stage?
I’m a ballerina, I have to be on stage’.
Forget it all.
None of those things mattered when we danced.
“After tonight’s show, you’re going to A
A- but I recommend you do this.”
Running a hand through my temporarily straightened hair, I spoke, “I’m due on stage every night for the next week. At the Royal Opera House. The Royal Opera House. The toe’s not broken, and even if it was, I’d still be going on stage.”
“You can do further damage-”
“I’ve had stress fractures before that felt worse, Doc,” I quipped.
“Now, about that prescription,”
Dougie glared at me.
He glared at me, then asked, “Can this affect her long-term ability to dance?”
My neck snapped around so fast I swore I would end up with a case of whiplash.
Was he getting up in my business?
I should have never let him stay.
“If it isn’t allowed to heal properly and further stress is endured, it can possibly cause serious injury in the long run. You’re lucky to have made it through tonight.”
My head snapped back at the Doc.
Yeah.
Whiplash no doubt.
“Um, ok. I’ll take a few months off.” The blatant sarcasm lacing my tone earned me a stern look from the doctor.
He could take that ‘lucky’ and shove it.
“And the prescription?”
I got my prescription, thanked the doctor, and left the room with a concerned Dougie at my side.
“Should ye even be walking on that foot?” Dougie asked, automatically taking my elbow in his hand.
He chuckled softly before adding, “I can carry ye, be your knight in shining armour.”
Those playful words brought me to a standstill, and my heart broke just a little more.
Huh.
I thought there were no pieces left to break.
“Knights aren’t all they’re cracked up to be,” I replied hoarsely.
It was true.
I had a knight, or did, and he hadn’t loved me enough.
Dougie touched my shoulder lightly.
“Are ye alright?”
I tried to smile.
“I don’t need a knight, Dougie, but I could do with a friend.”
He held my gaze, a glimmer of relief shone from his features.
“Aye, my wee flower, if ye’ll have me, I will be.”
Maybe I was the biggest idiot in the world, but it was always nice having friends.
I didn’t need any more bitterness in my life.
Plus karma was a crazy bitch, I did not want to mess with her if it could be avoided.
She had already fucked my life right up.
Dougie and I were friends once, I hoped we could truly be friends once more.