CHAPTER 26 Christmas Eve
December 24, 2010
William and I were on our way to Peak325 for my Christmas Eve dinner with my dad. All I had said to him since Thanksgiving was that single text telling him William would be joining us. He replied with a dry “ok,” so I already expected this dinner to be tense. But at least he didn’t refuse.
“Rent is due in a week,” I reminded William. “Nina has been asking about it, and you haven’t given me a reply about how much she’ll be paying.”
“Here we go.” William gave me a playful smile. He knew how stubborn I was, but he was even worse. Nina knew I paid William rent, so she felt uncomfortable living with me if this subject wasn’t cleared up. “I already told you what I think.”
“Neither of us paying rent is not a viable option, so just give me a number you’re comfortable with,” I insisted, cupping his face with my hand. But he refused to meet my gaze. “William, look at me.”
“Not looking at you helps me avoid the risk of being ensnared by your bewitching Jedi ways.” He kept his attention away from my face.
“Am I a witch or a Jedi?” I teased.
“You’ve proven to be a fascinating mix of both.” He tensed his neck as I playfully tried to pull his chin to make him turn toward me. “Guillermina, stop.”
“Look at me!” I said with an exasperated laugh.
William blinked slowly and relaxed his muscles, letting me turn his beautiful face to meet mine. “Happy now?” He groaned defeatedly.
“Very,” I whispered, making sure I widened my eyes in a supplicatory way. “Please, give me a number.”
“I don’t know how to deny you.” He took a deep breath and let it slowly out through his nose as he scanned my face. “But you don’t understand how badly it already makes me cringe whenever I get notified of your payment on the first day of every month when I don’t even want you to pay rent.”
“Oh, I do,” I said sarcastically. “You only remind me every month.”
“I’m not going to accept more money than what we already agreed upon.” His tone was resolute. “So if you want to split the $800 between the two of you, or if you want to tell her it’s $800 a month so you stop paying rent altogether, that’s up to you.”
It was beyond tempting to tell Nina that rent was $800 a month. She would still think it was a steal of a deal when she used to pay $1,300 a month for the smaller apartment she shared with CJ. It would give me a chance to save a little more. But that would defeat the purpose of my wanting to learn how to become more self-sufficient and financially responsible.
Arguing with William about this matter was futile. I knew he was already making a huge compromise by accepting the $800 to begin with, so I didn’t want to push it.
I parted my lips to deliver one final argument, but he cut me off by lifting his hand with a tsk. “I’m putting my foot down.” His brow creased, and I pressed my thumb over it to flatten the wrinkle.
“No frowning.” I grinned. “It’s Christmas.”
“Do we have an understanding, ?lskling?” He frowned again. “I don’t want any surprises.”
Flattening his brow one last time, I said, “Okay, okay.” I kissed his cheek softly, leaving a lipstick mark on it, but I rubbed it away. “I’ll tell Nina we’re going halfsies.”
“Stubborn as an ox.” He shook his head and slid his hand to my hips, pinching the flesh between his fingers.
“Ow!” I brushed his hand away. “Well, I’m an Aries. What did you expect?”
“I expected you to submit to my constant attempts to spoil you.” He leaned in and pressed his lips to my ear. “I guess I’ll have to make you submit in other ways … to compensate for my needs.”
A sudden warmth rushed up my neck and exploded in my cheeks, making William’s mouth tug up at the corner with satisfaction.
The SUV stopped in front of the fancy restaurant in the Meatpacking District. My dad’s car was parked a few feet ahead, and I could see Big Mike’s unmistakable silhouette in the driver’s seat.
“A few things before you step out,” Aaron said in his commanding voice. “If any photographers arrive, I’ll notify you through text. If that happens, I’ll arrange to pick you up through the back door, if possible. So keep your phones handy. But feel free to exit through the front door if you don’t hear from me.”
Aaron’s statement felt like a bucket of ice-cold water in the face. Even if the restaurant’s entrance looked relatively calm, the streets were busy with people coming and going. And William would undoubtedly get recognized inside.
“Okay. Thank you, Aaron.”
Aaron got out of the SUV to get the door for us.
The pressure of knowing my dad was waiting for us inside was too much, especially with how strained our relationship was and how vocal he’d been about his disapproval of my relationship with William. I was surprised he hadn’t refused when I told him William was coming.
Maybe he’s starting to accept the idea of us being together.
“It’s going to be fine.” William grabbed my hand and offered me a slow, reassuring smile, pulling me out of my thoughts as if somehow he had access to them. That alone released the tightness that had been building up in my chest.
“Hope so.” I smiled back as I got out, and he followed. We were only five steps away from the restaurant’s main entrance, and he guided me there swiftly while Aaron stayed back. I was relieved to see he would be waiting inside the car and not outside on the freezing night, as usual.
The hostess welcomed us and widened her eyes at the sight of William. I didn’t blame her. Not only did she obviously recognize him, but he looked mouthwatering in a dark olive-green suit. But she quickly reeled in the surprised look on her face and asked us under what name our reservation had been made after taking our coats.
“James Murphy,” I replied.
“Um …” She frowned, drumming her fingers against the computer’s display. “There seems to be a mistake with the reservation.” She grabbed two menus as she kept her attention glued to the screen. “But don’t worry.” She lifted her gaze with a smile. “We’ll get it fixed right away. Please follow me.”
William shot me a quizzical look, and I shrugged as we followed her.
My father came into view, sipping his amber liquid of choice from a small tumbler as he sat at a table for two, revealing the problem. He lifted his gaze and regarded William with indifference but smiled when he acknowledged me. He stood and greeted me with a kiss and William with a handshake.
He knew William was coming, and it was clear that he’d done this on purpose. But I didn’t want to kick off the night by arguing with him about it.
“My apologies for the confusion, Ambassador,” the ma?tre d’ said to my father, who was a regular at this place, after the hostess explained the situation. He lifted his fingers and signaled someone behind us. A quick moment later, two servers rushed our way and lifted the empty table for two next to ours to make room for William and me to sit. The ma?tre d’ removed the reserved sign from the table and motioned us to take a seat as William helped me to my chair.
“Sorry about that,” my dad said with a studied smile, picking up his glass and propping his elbow on the table. “It must’ve slipped my mind that you were joining us.” He sipped on his drink and settled it back next to his phone, which he couldn’t put away for a few hours. Not even on Christmas Eve.
We hadn’t been here for longer than five minutes, but I was beginning to feel my frustration peaking and spiraling in my gut.
A server approached us and took our drink order, mentioning that the first course of the Christmas prix-fixe menu would be served momentarily. But my appetite had taken a hit. William placed a hand on my knee and squeezed lightly. I was so embarrassed about my dad’s rude behavior and hoped we could be civil to one another for the rest of the evening.
“So, William,” my dad started to say, “how’s work been?”
I squeezed William’s hand over my knee and hoped for the best.
“Great, thank you for asking.” William smiled, and our server left two glasses of red wine in front of us. I immediately brought mine to my lips and took a longer sip than I usually would in public. “I just got back from filming in Vancouver.”
“Ah, yes.” My dad lifted his brows. “I saw the tabloid images of you stepping out of a restaurant with that woman behind you.”
My jaw dropped. I was too stunned to say something when William replied, “I didn’t take you for a tabloid enthusiast, James.” He chuckled and took a sip of his wine. William and I had cleared out that incident. That must’ve made it easier for him to come up with a comeback without worrying about my feelings getting hurt.
“You’d be surprised to learn the things I’m willing to do for my daughter,” my dad replied with a straight face.
I cleared my throat, intending to say something that would stop his rude behavior, when a woman and a teenage girl approached the table shyly.
“Sorry to disturb you,” the woman said to William in a Southern accent, resting her hands on the blonde girl’s shoulders. “My daughter is a huge fan, and I was wondering if she could take a quick photo with you since you haven’t started eating yet.”
By the look of the woman’s dreamy eyes, I could easily tell she was probably the bigger fan between the two of them and had likely used her daughter as an excuse to approach William.
My dad stared at William with a don’t you dare interrupt dinner kind of look, which only encouraged William to do the opposite.
“Of course.” William stood and buttoned his suit, offering them his Hollywood persona smile. And I took a deep, calming breath, secretly enjoying seeing how William made my dad squirm.
“Oh, goodness,” the woman said with a giggle, arching back her neck to look up at William. “You’re even taller in person.” She placed her daughter beside William and snapped a quick photo of them. I could feel the entire restaurant’s eyes on us at this point. And even if grabbing everyone’s attention wasn’t ideal, a part of me was enjoying seeing my dad’s disgruntled face.
“Thank you so much!” The woman practically shouted with a toothy grin. She hunched over behind her daughter and said, “Say thank you, Myla.”
“Thank you, William.” The girl’s face went tomato red.
“Have a good evening, ladies.” William nodded and unbuttoned his jacket to sit back at the table. “I’m sorry about that,” he whispered, pressing a soft kiss on my cheek. “You were saying, James?”
My dad clicked his tongue, his features edged with passive contempt, and the first course arrived before he could threaten William for a second time.
We managed to eat in peace while my dad inquired about my school life, pointedly ignoring William’s presence. The small talk continued, and the servers had to politely redirect more than five individuals who attempted to approach our table separately to chat with William, requesting they refrain from disrupting us.
My dad stabbed a piece of turkey with his fork and said, “Must be uncomfortable to be recognized wherever you go.” He swiped the piece of meat on the gravy and took it to his mouth.
“One gets used to it,” William countered, reaching for a piece of bread from the basket.
“Mm.” My dad wiped his mouth with his napkin and settled it back on his lap. “Not to mention how unsafe all this attention is altogether. But it puts me somewhat at ease knowing you have private security and that they’ve also been watching after my daughter when you were away. That’s very decent of you. I appreciate it.” He tilted his head and considered William for a moment before shifting his attention toward me as if trying to measure our reactions, but I was quick to spin back the initial shock before he could read it on my face.
William had private security following me around behind my back?
This couldn’t be. William wouldn’t keep something like that from me. But I couldn’t seem oblivious about this in front of my father. It would only give him more reason to disrespect our relationship. So I had to fight past the need to ask William if that was true or not and let him cue me into the conversation.
“Ah, yes.” William squeezed my thigh under the table. “Agent Hawthorne is as loyal and trustworthy as they come.”
I had to bite the inside of my cheek to prevent myself from eliciting a reaction that would give away my cluelessness about the existence of said Agent Hawthorne and the fact that he’d been following me around without my knowledge.
Aaron had better start praying if he knew about this and failed to inform me.
A pile of figurative bricks had been dumped on top of me, and yet I managed to smile and nod. I couldn’t show a sliver of weakness in front of my dad.
“And here I was thinking you wanted less security,” my dad said with a chuckle and a subtle shake of his head, irony oozing out of every word. “Not more.” He turned to William and nodded once. “But I’m thankful all the same.”
I dragged air into my lungs, quietly disappointed in William for not telling me himself and having to find out through my father. “I don’t even notice his presence.” I smiled, signaling the server for a refill. “Agent Hawthorne is stealthy and knows how to keep a low profile.” I brushed William’s hand off my leg. It was all I could do to show him I was very upset, even if I was going along with it.
Our server brought my wine and dessert, but I skipped the latter. All I wanted was for dinner to end already so William and I could go home and talk. The night had been a disaster so far. I didn’t even know why I thought spending Christmas Eve with my dad was a good idea after how awful Thanksgiving had been. Bringing William only made things worse. I hated myself for wanting my dad’s approval and him for not even trying to make our father-daughter relationship work.
“Oh, wow!” A man yelled from afar. “Is that William Sj?berg?” I turned to see a chef rushing our way.
“Excuse me.” William pushed his chair back with an open laugh and rose from his seat. “Gustav!”
The chef, Gustav, approached William and embraced him with a few hearty pats on the back. They slapped each other’s shoulders and started chatting in Swedish. It never ceased to impress me how William knew someone everywhere he went. He had so many friends and acquaintances.
All eyes were on William’s interaction with the chef, and I could see a few people aiming their phones at them, some more discreet than others.
“William’s a great chef, you know?” I said to my dad, not only to fill the stifling silence but because it was the truth. He needed to know there was more to William than his judgment-filled conception of him. And even if I was angry and disappointed in William for having withheld information from me regarding his bodyguard following me around in secret, I still had this sick need for my father’s approval.
“A cook, you mean?” my dad countered, lifting his glass to his lips and draining his drink. “Chef titles are reserved for those who graduate from culinary school.”
That couldn’t be any farther from the truth. Being a chef is about talent and dedication to the culinary craft, and William possessed both. Not that I would argue about this with my father. Instead, I snorted with evident disgust and shook my head, utterly disappointed in him. I leaned in to whisper, “Why do you hate him so much?” It was impossible to remove the edge of sadness from my voice.
“I don’t. I’m just trying to make you see he’s not the kind of man you want as a partner and that it’s clear to me it won’t work out between you,” he said casually. “You might think it will now because you’ve been dating for a few months, and he’s been away for half the time.” He signaled a server to approach and ordered more water. “And this is the first time you’ve dined out in public with him, haven’t you?”
We had before, in Tel Aviv, but he was right; this was our first public outing here in New York. Dinner at Pocantico Hills a few days back had been a private event, so it didn’t count either.
“It is,” I replied as calmly as I could. “But what does that have to do with anything?”
“People will constantly invade your privacy and personal space whenever you’re with him,” my dad affirmed, so sure of himself as if he were in possession of a crystal ball and had the sudden ability to see our future. “And you will grow tired of it. I know how much you value your privacy.”
William returned before I could reply. My dad wasn’t saying anything I didn’t already know, but the added assumptions of how those things would make me feel or affect our relationship were unwarranted. And repetitive. We’d already had this conversation on more than one occasion. There was nothing he could say to make me change my mind about wanting to be with William.
At the same time, it’s not like William and I were planning to go out for regular walks in Times Square. I was sure that we were more than capable of having a social life without having his celebrity status interfering in a way that was detrimental to our relationship. Having a few people try to approach the table to greet him wasn’t something I couldn’t deal with.
“Sorry. Gustav’s a friend from culinary school,” William explained after retaking his seat at the table. “I didn’t know he worked here. I hadn’t seen him in years.”
I smiled and nodded even if I was furious at him, but I had to pretend otherwise until we were alone.
“Kudos to your friend.” My dad sipped on his water and signaled the server to bring over the check with a sway of his fingers. “This is one of my favorite restaurants in the city.”
The food was great, and I would’ve commented on it, but I was done for the day. It was foolish of me to think dinner would go well. All I could think of was asking William about his security team following me without my knowledge.
William tried to capture my hand under the table, but I didn’t allow his fingers to intertwine with mine. Instead, I crossed my arms loosely in front of my stomach.
The server left the check on the table, and William and my dad reached out for it at the same time, but my dad was quicker. He opened the leather bill folder and said as he inspected the ticket, “Billie was telling me you love cooking but weren’t able to graduate?” He pulled out his wallet from his pants pocket and met William’s gaze.
“I did not say that,” I intervened, widening my eyes at my dad. I was going to start defending William, but he was faster to speak.
“It wasn’t a matter of ability,” William retorted. “I chose not to graduate to pursue acting full time.”
“Ah, I see.” My dad tossed his credit card inside the bill folder and closed it, setting it on the table again. “You were so close to graduating, though. I believe it would’ve brought you great satisfaction to do so. But I guess some people find it easier to change their minds abruptly and leave things unfinished. Sometimes out of fear of commitment or a desire to move on to something new out of boredom.”
“Dad,” I warned. “That’s enough.” The only thing stopping me from getting up and leaving was that I didn’t want to make a scene when most people at the restaurant couldn’t stop staring at our table or pointing their phones at us.
The server took the bill folder with my dad’s credit card and left.
“That’s okay.” William’s features remained impassive, but I knew this was a sensitive subject for him, and his acting skills were the only thing keeping his emotions from showing on his face. “If you’re implying that I can’t commit to your daughter because I chose not to graduate, then you are mistaken.”
“You’re the one saying it.” My dad frowned and tilted his head, feigning innocence. “But it’s clear to me that you have a case of prolonged procrastination, and I am afraid it might seep into other areas of your life. And I’d say that’s a rather unbecoming attribute to possess.”
William leaned in, pressing his index finger on the table. “You don’t know shit about me.” He inhaled slowly but loudly through his nose. His patience was growing thin, which was more than evident in his body language.
“I know enough.” My dad’s tone grew darker as he emphasized the last word. Who was this man sitting before me? I couldn’t recognize my father. How could he claim to love and care about me when he treated William like this? He failed to realize that he was not only disrespecting him but hurting me, too. Deeply.
“And I’ve had enough.” I drained my wineglass and pushed back my chair. “Thanks for dinner.” William and I stood. I had no texts or missed calls from Aaron, which meant the coast was clear. Good.
“Of course.” My dad signed the check and stood, offering us his rehearsed diplomatic smile. He grabbed William’s shoulder and said, “The three of us will step out of this restaurant together. You will not disrespect me by walking out on me in front of all these people.”
I looked around, and several diners were still pointing their phones our way, but William didn’t care to smile or pretend he was fine anymore. Neither did I. But my father cared too much about the optics, and even if he disapproved of William, he probably wanted this Christmas dinner to be portrayed as picture-perfect to the public when the photos inevitably filtered out onto the web.
It was too late for that now.
When my dad talked to me with that intimidating tone, the innocent, rule-abiding little girl inside me took over, and there was nothing I could do but comply. The three of us walked toward the exit and found Aaron and Big Mike idling next to the hostess podium.
“We have a situation,” Big Mike said to my father as William and I were handed back our coats. “The place is swarmed with photographers and onlookers alike. We talked to the staff about leaving through the back door, but the alley’s width won’t fit the cars. We’ll have to escort you through the front.”
So that’s why Aaron hadn’t bothered to text me.
My dad let out an exasperated sigh. The restaurant’s doors were solid wood, so we couldn’t see what awaited us outside.
“I want my daughter inside that SUV untouched and unharmed,” my dad barked at Aaron and Big Mike. “I can’t have a camera slamming into her face again.”
“We won’t allow it,” Aaron replied with confidence.
“Escort them first,” my dad ordered Aaron and Big Mike. “And once they leave, I’ll step out with Mike.”
“No need. Your daughter is safe with me,” William said to my father, reaching for my hand and grabbing it tightly enough as if afraid that I would avoid his grasp. But I didn’t. I took his hand in mine and pressed pause on my indignation. “Hawthorne.”
A tall man I’d failed to account for leaning against the wall beside us straightened up and took a step forward. He wore an all-black ensemble that consisted of tactical pants and a long wool coat over a black turtleneck. He had short dark waves combed to precision, a well-kept beard, and supple lashes that lined his striking, warm amber eyes. His chiseled features only heightened his serious and professional demeanor.
“Mr. Sj?berg.” He nodded once and rested his hands into a single fist in front of him. His gaze flicked toward my dad for a second, and I swear I could see his eyes getting darker.
“Agent Hawthorne and Aaron will escort us to the SUV,” William said.
Two people walked into the restaurant, and it allowed us to get a glimpse of the madness awaiting us outside. My dad cursed under his breath and set me aside to speak privately.
“You have two weeks to put an end to this … infatuation of yours,” my dad said through gritted teeth, pinning me with his stare. The diplomacy had left his body at this point. “I’ve given you space and allowed you to entertain this stubborn notion, but you cannot be serious about him. Being with William puts you at risk. Did you see what’s waiting for us outside? That’s going to be your life from now on. Forget about privacy. Forget about going anywhere without security for the rest of your life.”
“Or what?” I scoffed. “You’ll hire another bodyguard? At least now, there’s a real reason to have security.”
He snorted with a subtle shake of his head. “Or consider this semester your last in Parsons since I’ve already paid for it,” he spat. “Feel free to find a way to pay for your studies or join William’s dropout club.” My dad widened his eyes for a fraction of a second as if stunned by his own remark. I saw it. Saw the regret kicking in after he said the words. But he couldn’t take it back, could he? No. His pride was deeply rooted into the very core of his being.
He’d certainly stunned me with that threat, but I didn’t have time to think about the implications of losing 100% of my father’s financial support. He’d detected my weakness and went for the blow, disregarding the text he sent me months ago about my tuition being covered regardless of my decision. So much for being “a reasonable man.”
“And here I was thinking we’d agreed not to exchange Christmas gifts this year,” I said, my tone dripping in sarcasm.
“Your coat, Ambassador,” one of the hostesses said with a cautious smile, offering it to him. He thanked her and returned the smile as if he hadn’t just threatened his daughter on Christmas, and the fake gesture grated on my last nerve. He grabbed his coat, throwing it on in a swift move.
I drew in my brows and stuck my cold hands inside my coat pockets. “I’m not doing this again.”
“Doing what? Getting another free meal from your father?” His attempt at humor fell flat.
“Playing nice for the sake of your ego and your image.”
He stared at me, indignant and confused.
I swallowed past the panic and the sadness caused by the significance of my words. “Merry Christmas,” I said, turning around.
“Oh, and one more thing,” my dad tossed in casually like this dinner hadn’t been a disaster. “I suggest you and Aaron say your goodbyes when you get home.”
“No,” I said, meeting his challenge-filled stare. The panic in my voice was embarrassingly evident.
The ace under his fucking sleeve.
“He can’t go.” Having Aaron was a necessity now. Thinking about dating a high-profile celebrity like William without having security made me swallow hard. But I knew it was one of my dad’s perks in the “Get with the Program or Else” starter pack, which I was no longer willing to partake in. Having Aaron around made me feel safe.
“I agree.” He tucked his hands inside his pants pockets. “It’s up to you then, I guess.”
“Please,” I begged in barely a whisper, the self-loathing hitting me hard. Just let me have this one thing.
“I’ll have my assistant get back to you about it.”
With a sharp nod, I pressed my lips together and walked away to where William stood, waiting for me.
William stopped whispering to Agent Hawthorne the moment he saw me coming.
“Ready to leave?” William ran a protective arm around my shoulder. I replied with a nod and shot my dad one last dismissive look.
William kissed my temple. I needed him to make me feel better and tell me that everything would be alright, but I was so freaking mad at him! Even so, I needed someone to hold on to emotionally, at least until we got home and I had the chance to actually be angry at him. “I got you.”
“I know.” Gosh, I knew he did, but damn it, that simple but powerful phrase reminded me of Caleb and how he would say that all the time when I needed to hear it the most.
My emotions were all over the place, but I took a deep breath and pulled my shit together.
“Shield her,” William said to Agent Hawthorne, who pulled down his masculine jaw in understanding. He quickly dragged a black buff over the bottom half of his face, leaving only his eyes on display.
“He’s camera shy.” William laughed under his breath, and Agent Hawthorne rolled his eyes.
The doors opened, and the screams were deafening. I didn’t understand how these people found out William was here. Aaron walked out first to make way for us to pass, and Hawthorne created a barrier around me with his arms. The flashing camera lights were not only blinding but incessant. People stretched out their arms with the hopes of touching William. Some shouted, “I love you!” Others yelled out his name. I even caught a “Marry me!”
Agent Hawthorne opened the door for us while Aaron hurried to the driver’s seat. The madness had ended in the blink of an eye. We were now safe inside the SUV. Hawthorne shut the door and tapped the window to let Aaron know we were good to go. I pulled the seatbelt and fastened it, but when I turned my attention back to the window, William’s bodyguard was gone.
Damn, he really is stealthy.
No wonder I never caught him following me around.