25. Antonio
Chapter 25
Antonio
“ Y ou were supposed to wait for me in the parking lot.” I waited for twenty minutes in the burning sun, looking for Elka’s blond hair so I could help her unload her tools and ingredients for the cook-off. The cooks were allowed to set up as early as five in the morning to make sure they had plenty of time to make the perfect chili.
“I couldn’t sleep so I got here early. It would have been silly to wait for you.” She didn’t turn around. Not that I minded. Especially today because she wore loose-fitting denim shorts that shouldn’t have been flattering, but they were. And the flowing layered tank tops hugged her breasts beautifully, making me wish we were alone and I could touch her. Taste her. Make her scream my name.
“Why couldn’t you sleep?” She’d been acting weird since that morning in her bedroom, but every time I brought it up, Elka denied anything was wrong.
“Maybe I’m nervous about cooking for so many people.”
“Maybe you are but you’ve got this. Maybe you can tell me what’s really wrong?” She still didn’t turn, and I stood right behind her so she could feel me there. “You don’t have to carry everything alone, Elka.”
“I’m not carrying anything,” she insisted and turned to face me, blue eyes firm. Solid. Distant. “I just want to stay on track for today, that’s all.”
I didn’t believe her but the best thing I could do for Elka right now was to alleviate any stress she felt by doing my duty as a Hometown Hero. I strapped on an apron and started chopping what was left of the vegetables, wondering how in the hell I managed to screw up. Again.
Bringing up her parents had been a mistake and by the time she finally, reluctantly, told me the truth, it was too late to undo what I’d already done. I tried to prepare her, but after that day, Elka kept everything in perfect little boxes. She didn’t talk about her parents and she rarely spoke about her brother, instead choosing to talk about the present and the future. Like she wanted to forget her past altogether.
I’d been there and nearly let it ruin me, so I knew where she was headed and the damn stubborn woman was determined to push me away. “Okay, all the veggies are chopped.”
She looked over her shoulder and assessed the piles in each bowl with careful scrutiny. “Good job. Thanks.”
I couldn’t take her silent treatment. “I’m sorry, Elka.”
She froze at my words and when those blue eyes looked up at me, I could have cried from the hurt swimming in them. “I wish I believed you, Antonio.”
“I was only trying to help, not dig. I swear.” It was important that she know that. “You’ll never heal if you don’t face this head on, Elka.”
“Yeah? What makes you such an expert?”
This was it. The moment of truth where I spilled my ugly-ass truth to someone other than the department-assigned shrink. “Because I know—”
“Excuse me. Do you have an alternative chili for one of the judges?”
Elka sighed and wiggled away from me. “Yes. There’s a vegetarian option with two types of beans. Cheese is optional.” The official woman with the clipboard seemed satisfied with that answer, gave me a long look, and moved on to the next booth.
“I’ve been where you are, Elka.” Why in the hell was this so hard to talk about? I sighed and tried again. “You have—”
“Elka?” She froze at the sound of the voice, hand gripping the long wooden spoon she used to stir the chili. “Elka, your mother is addressing you.”
She turned and looked at me first, hurt and betrayal shining in her eyes, before she shuttered all her emotions and turned to the couple who looked like they stepped from the pages of a L.L. Bean catalog. “What are you guys doing here?”
Her mother smiled. “Is that any way to greet your parents?”
“To greet you would assume I’m happy to see you and we both know that isn’t the case.” She folded her arms and stepped away from me too. She was an island, one solitary unit. Facing it all on her own. “What do you want?”
“You wouldn’t answer our calls.”
“A hint you clearly didn’t take,” she shot back with more sarcasm than I’d ever seen or heard from her. “Listen, I’m not interested in talking to you or reconnecting. Enjoy your stay in Tulip.” She went back to the simmering pot near the back of the booth, not acknowledging anyone.
“You said she’d be happy to see us,” her father snarled in my direction.
I heard the intake of air, that gasp of surprise, and I knew that Elka had heard. “That’s when I thought you were all just suffering from grief. You need to give Elka some space.”
Her mother put a tissue to her face in distress and her father simply nodded and led his wife away. “We’ll talk soon, Elka.”
“No, we won’t.”
I knew I messed up and I knew it was bad because Elka hadn’t just gone silent, she’d shut down. Completely. “Elka, please.”
“You did this.” Her words were so quiet I could barely hear them over the growing noise all around as the town began to show up for the cook-off. “I thought things were different, that you’d stopped trying to dig up dirt on me. But you didn’t.”
“Elka, please.” I reached for her, but she shrugged away from my touch. “I didn’t know.”
“You must have had a good laugh,” she said, a bitter kind of amusement on her face and in her voice. “Stupid Elka thinking you were interested when you were just trying to prove some point to yourself. You got me good, Antonio. Another lesson learned.”
“It wasn’t like that. I thought I was helping.”
She glared up at me, something almost like hate shining in her eyes. “Even after I told you everything?”
“I called them before that morning,” I admitted, albeit reluctantly. “You were clearly hurting and I wanted to help.”
“No, you wanted to know what I was hiding and now you have it all. Every sordid detail. I’m sure my parents will fill you in on everything you need to know, Antonio.” She shook her head and angrily wiped away a tear. “I can’t believe I thought I was in love with you.”
“Elka, let’s—”
“You should go, Antonio.” I tried to talk to her, to make her listen, but Elka was beyond that now. “You’ve fulfilled your obligation as a Hometown Hero and I’ll be sure to let Janey know. Oh, hang on.” She cleaned her hands and dug into her back pocket where she produced her phone. After snapping a few images and typing on her screen, she glanced up at me briefly. “Required photos for the day also sent.” She turned her back to me once more and I didn’t have the heart to stay when the tears began.
I was as asshole and I didn’t deserve her, but hearing her say she loved me changed everything. I would find a way to make this right.
I had to.