Chapter 11
Chapter Eleven
Ella
TEETH - WesGhost, Diggy Graves
I t’s not Reeves who catches my smile. His head is down, reading something on his desk. Chris, however, is talking to a girl at the front of the room, and I feel like a magnet. Because the second I enter, his eyes are on me.
I stop for a second, unsure what to do as he lets his gaze roam over my body. His eyebrows pinch in disapproval, making me want to run to him and explain myself. I want to bow my head and ask if what I’m doing is okay, because that’s what my subconscious loves. His authorization to do something, his acceptance of my behavior.
I fight my instinct and walk to the front row, sitting in a middle desk where Reeves will have a perfect view of me. He’s still not looking up, but he will have to at some point.
“Isn’t he so perfect?”
I startle, turning to the girl sitting right next to me. I don’t even know her name, that’s how rarely anyone talks to each other in this class .
“Sorry?”
“Christopher Murray. He’s been helping so many of us. Professor Reeves is going to struggle to kick us out of his class this term.”
I forget to even ask her for her name, my brain too busy focusing on Chris again as I openly stare at him. It doesn’t stop her from talking some more.
“He took time to reassure me about my essay when I handed it last week. I asked if he could look at it before, maybe give me a few tips, but he said he’d be grading them so he couldn’t. Still, the kind words meant a lot. He’s so nice.”
He didn’t only give me kind words. He gave me more than the tips this girl asked for and didn’t get. He rewrote parts of mine because he knows I need to stay in this class.
“Megan McLean is so lucky.”
Pouring a bucket of ice on me would have felt warmer. I used to feel so special in Chris’s eyes. I used to know, despite our relationship being secret, that I was the one he belonged to. Now, it’s Megan.
Chris politely smiles at the student he’s talking to, tapping her upper arm to tell her the conversation is over as he excuses himself. He walks to my desk, standing in my view of Reeves, and presses a hand on the wood. The other girl is focused on reading her notes now, and he doesn’t give her an ounce of attention. No, it’s all on me.
“Ella,” he says in nothing but a professional tone, although the level of it means only I can hear him. “What do you think you’re doing?”
I smile politely. “Waiting for class to start?”
Chuckling casually, he drums his fingers on my desk. “Is there a reason you’re dressed so”—he looks at my body, picking his words carefully—“ differently today.”
“I’m wearing SFU’s undergrad uniform,” I laugh softly. “It’s the same one every day.”
He doesn’t like my sarcasm. His fingers pause their movements, his palm lightly slapping the desk.
“Are you dying to get punished?” he says, lowering his voice even more, all semblance of politeness falling away. This is the side none of those girls see. When the smile drops, and the possession kicks in.
“If you want to touch someone so badly, why don’t you touch your girlfriend? Or is it fiancée now? Aren’t you going to be married soon?”
After what he did yesterday in Reeves’s office, I think I’m allowed to bring up Megan whenever he gets too close.
“Alright, everyone.” Reeves’s voice cuts through our conversation, and Chris takes a step back, heading to his desk. “I’m giving back your graded essays today. If you got less than a B, I’m politely asking you to leave. You don’t have what it takes.”
My hands are sweating, gaze dropping to my desk as I wait. Because I’m at the front, I’m one of the first ones to get my paper back.
“Miss Baker,” Reeves says, his eyes sticking to my open shirt for a few seconds too long. His face is blank when he adds, “I’m not sure if my assistant is more lenient than I am, or if you were less disappointing than usual. I’ll be the one grading your next essay.”
Ouch.
But it’s hard to care about what he says when he places the paper before me, and I look at the red circled B .
My eyes fly to Chris. This is thanks to him.
His gaze is on me too, still translating his unhappiness about my clothes, but I’m not bowing to his will. I have one problem to solve at a time, and my current issues with him are not at the top of my priorities. Keeping out of trouble with the Silent Circle is.
Reeves splits the class in two today. We’re studying the same case, but the half with him is studying the defense, and the half with Chris the prosecution. To my luck, I end up with Reeves. It also means I witness all the girls fluttering their eyes at Chris, smiling brightly every time he teaches them something nicely, or every time he slips them a kind word. He’s not flirting. He doesn’t try to seduce them; he’s just naturally a magnet for people who need care.
On my side, I’m almost ashamed of how obviously I flirt with Reeves. I would be if things weren’t so dire. And when he puts a hand on the small of my back while he looks over my shoulder at the notes I wrote down, I know I’m doing the right thing.
I need that invitation at all costs, and he’s the only Shadow I know apart from Chris. And Chris will never let me in. He’s already refused my mom. Not only that, but historically, I know him to put my brother before me.
When the class finishes, I take my time to pack my bag. I look at my phone as students exit in silence. Chris lingers too. He talks with Reeves about his next assignment, about what the professor needs from him. But when he runs out of excuses to stay, and Reeves notices I’m still here, he asks Chris to go back to the office to prepare for Monday’s class.
My ex massages the back of his neck, walking past me on his way out. He doesn’t say anything to me. He doesn’t even glance at me.
I do my best to brush off the sting and look back at Reeves, placating an innocent smile on my face.
“Miss Baker,” he says, leaning back against his desk and crossing his arms over his chest. His white button-down is well-fitted, and his defined muscles show under the material. “I’m sure there’s something I can do for you.”
I get up on shaky legs, making sure my skirt is short enough but still hiding my band-aid and the scars around it.
He smiles knowingly by the time I’m close to him—close enough that I could push my breasts against his torso if I took too big of a breath.
“Wasn’t a B enough?” he asks in a serious voice.
“More than enough, Professor.”
“Then what could you possibly be debasing yourself for?”
The words hurt, but I swallow the shame, putting my pride to the side for this. I put a hand on his chest, my heart skipping from the fear of this blowing up in my face.
“You know my family’s situation with the Circle.”
The second I mention the secret society he’s part of, his eyes flick behind me, probably double-checking that no one is within earshot.
“I do.”
For someone who tried to get me to give him a blowjob in his office, he’s making this unnecessarily hard for me. Or maybe that’s exactly his goal.
“Professor Reeves,” I huff. “I need an invitation to the initiations. My brother was refused one, and we have to make it up to the Silent Circle one way or another.”
I’ve barely finished asking my question when that disgustingly smug smirk spreads on his handsome face. His blue eyes sparkle with excitement, and he stands taller.
“An invitation?” he chuckles. “Ella, those are very hard to get even for a member. We need a reason to bring a woman to initiations.”
“Please. My family correcting their mistakes to the Circle is reason enough. I’m willing to do anything to put this issue to rest.”
His smile drops. Cocking an eyebrow, a shadow of danger crosses his features.
“Willingness to do anything is a very risky thing to say to a member of the Silent Circle. I would be very careful about the kind of favor you ask a Shadow.” He brings his thumb to my lower lip, pulling it down before leaving it completely alone. “We wouldn’t want you to get out of your depth here again, would we?”
I shake my head slightly. “I mean it. Get me an invitation and I will?—”
“There is absolutely nothing you can do to convince me to get you invited, Ella. Because if I do, I’ll have all I want from you anyway. You’re probably the least likely candidate to get a husband at the initiations. No one will want to take on the debt your family owes. You’ll end up being an Aphrodite, and I’ll have access to your body whenever I want. There isn’t anything you can offer I wouldn’t already have.”
He puts his hands on his desk behind him, leaning back. “So, really, your future depends on how kind I’m feeling.” He shrugs. “And I’m not feeling too kind today.”
My heart drops. “W-what?”
“You heard me. You should have thought twice before acting like a prude in my office. We both know what you really are.”
“No. No, please.” I act on instinct, dropping to my knees as my hands fly to his belt. “I’ll make it right. I’m not a prude. I was scared.”
He fists both my wrists with strong hands. “No. You simply didn’t need anything from me. Now you do, and here you are, back on your knees. I said I wouldn’t get you an invitation, Miss Baker. Save yourself the humiliation and go to your next class.”
Shell-shocked, I can’t move when he lets go of my arms and steps around me. Even once he’s left the room, I struggle to get back into a standing position.
As I exit, it’s hard to swallow past my tight throat. The shock and fear push me back into a state of blankness. If I can’t feel anything, I can’t feel anxiety. I’m a ghost haunting the hallways of the Humanities building, slithering among other students. How could he say no? He was my last option.
My brain is foggy, my mind empty. So much that I don’t notice someone is following me until a body starts walking close enough to me that our arms touch.
I recognize the presence all too well, and when Chris puts a hand on my lower back, a shiver runs down my spine from the simple yet possessive gesture.
“Let’s do it the easy way, Sweets.” As I’m about to stop walking, he nudges me with his hand, forcing me to keep going.
I can already feel the eyes of the other students on me. Their questions are loud. They know my ex is back. They know he has a girlfriend. I shouldn’t be talking to him in public.
He can feel my uneasiness, adding, “You answer my questions in the time it takes for you to walk to your next class, and I play nice.” My wild eyes snap up to him, but he taps my lower back. “Eyes ahead. We’re just having a conversation.”
Something is seething beneath his too-calm tone, and I know I’m in more trouble than I can handle.
“How long has it been going on, you and Reeves?” he asks in a voice only for my ears. Someone he knows walks past us, and he nods, smiling at him like he’s not in the midst of terrorizing me.
I shake my head, unsure of what to say. So, I say nothing.
“Was the first time before I transferred? Or is it more recent, like when you came to hand in the essay yesterday? Did he fuck you while I was right outside?”
“When Megan was right outside, you mean?”
I keep my eyes ahead of me, like he said, so I can’t gauge his reaction. But the barely hidden fury in his voice tells me a lot.
“Oh, Sweets. I really do prefer it when we get along, but right now, I’m dying to drag you into the nearest room and bend you over a desk. I’ll rip those nice lace panties you put on for Reeves and shove them in your mouth so no one hears you scream when I kick your legs open and slap your tight little cunt over and over again.”
I feel myself blanch at the same time as something liquifies in my lower belly. Can anyone see my embarrassing reaction? The exact panties he mentioned dampen as we keep walking, and the small friction from the steps I take makes me want to run. I want to feel more .
I look up at him, but he’s still looking ahead, guiding us through the hallway. I have to keep him away from me so my conscience can stay clean. I won’t get involved with Chris while he’s with Megan. I can’t be that girl. I will never be that girl. So I hit him, and I hit hard.
“Your obsession with me is turning into desperation, Chris,” I try to say in an even voice. “In fact, I’d call it pathetic.”
A smile spreads on my face when his hand leaves my lower back, thinking I’ve won this round. It drops right away when I see why. Megan is waiting outside a door, looking down at her phone.
We’re far enough that he can still talk as we get closer. He won’t get his answer about me and Reeves, and it brings a sense of satisfaction to know he can’t get anything he wants whenever he wants.
“I need you to understand something, Ella.” He doesn’t even slow his pace, and with each step, he takes a greater risk of Megan hearing him. Still, he adds, “My obsession with you might be pathetic, but it’s deadly serious. So watch what you do, or who knows how I’ll react?”
“Make sure no one hears you when you say that,” I taunt him. “We wouldn’t want them knowing your gentle fa?ade hides a fucking monster.”
He stops in front of Megan, and she finally looks up, noticing us. Before acknowledging her, he finishes his conversation with me. “Ella, how’s Enzo, by the way? I heard about his knee.” He tsks as he shakes his head. “Such a shame.”
My heart stops entirely, blood draining from my face. In the two weeks Chris behaved and stayed away from me, I went for a coffee with Enzo. That night, he was attacked when he walked back from practice. Did Chris just insinuate that… No.
Megan tilts her head to the side, not even saying hello. “Who’s Enzo?”
She’s asking me, but I’m too shellshocked to answer anything, my mouth dry and my brain unable to string a sentence together.
“Some guy Ella dated for a bit,” Chris answers casually.
"What happened to him?” she insists. Not out of kindness, but pure bitchy curiosity.
“He…he got attacked on his way back from a late pr actice,” I rasp. “Bat to the knee.” I don’t even feel like I’m present anymore.
Megan hisses, rearing her head back. “Ouch. That sounds personal.”
Chris leans against the wall, making sure he’s too far back for Megan to see the slight smile curving his mouth. “It does, doesn’t it?”
“Are you guys still together?”
Does the woman ever mind her own business? She’s worse than Hermes.
I shake my head as pieces fall into place. “We only had one date, and he didn’t contact me again after his incident.”
And that small smile turns into a full smirk as Chris crosses his strong arms over his chest. Look at those muscles. The damage they could do if they were swinging a bat with full strength… I feel sick.
“Aw, Ella. I’m so sorry.” Megan puts a hand on my arm in a fake reassuring gesture. But her fingers are as cold as her eyes.
“It’s all for the best,” Chris says with a slight shrug. “Ella is very… selective . Some people she wouldn’t date if they were her last option on earth.”
My dark gaze goes to his mocking one as Megan laughs. “Damn. You’re a tough one to please, aren’t you?”
I scratch my throat, feeling myself losing composure. “Right,” I agree numbly. “Anyway…class.” I point behind me with my thumb, completely unaware of where I am in the building.
That’s the only goodbye they get from me.
And I skip class. I feel too sick to even be in the same building as Chris.
A bat to the knee. My imagination flashes images of Enzo walking home alone. The shadow I had seen until now when I thought about it fades into Chris.
He’s insane.
Completely, utterly…
Obsessed?
Alex is at the house she shares with Xi tonight, and when Peach texts me begging me to go to our sorority’s party with her, I simply answer that I think I’ve got a stomach bug.
I don’t. I spent the whole day letting my anxiety get the best of me. I threw up so many times I’ve lost count. I lie in bed, checking my university emails, and my heart falls as I see something from campus security.
Dear Students,
We regret to inform you of recent accidents and unfortunate attacks on campus. Your safety is our top priority, and we are enhancing security measures to prevent further incidents.
While we are working to make our campus safer, we advise you to follow these safety guidelines:
Travel in groups, especially at night.
Stay in well-lit areas.
Report suspicious activity to campus security.
Use campus escort services during late hours.
In case of an emergency, dial 911.
We have increased patrols and are working with local law enforcement. If you need assistance, contact the University Security Office.
Thank you for your cooperation .
I know of the attack on Enzo, but I go on my search engine right away, typing ‘accident at SFU campus.’
The picture of a car that crashed into a tree comes up.
Two students from Silver Falls University in urgent care, following DUI crash after sorority party.
I scroll down and look at the pictures. It’s the two guys who harassed me at the party. I never realized that had happened.
“Holy…fuck,” I whisper to myself.
My thoughts keep oscillating from the Silent Circle, the invitation I didn’t get, to Chris’s violence, to tie up everything in a nice bow when I think of Megan.
Chris is not a perfect, peace-and-love type of man, but he doesn’t often use violence as an answer. He’s been in fights, but it was reluctantly, for the people around him. Mainly, his foster siblings. Jake had a tendency to get into trouble. Rose had an ego that was dangerous for everyone.
When it comes to me, though…I know he’s different. I saw it again at the party with those two guys. Something triggers him, and the Chris everyone knows disappears within a blink.
He once punched my Halloween ball date. The guy had been a little too touchy, and I couldn’t take Chris to the ball since we were hiding from Luke. That’s what everyone knows of it, but later on, he cornered him too. Threatened him, his family, said things I had never imagined would come out of his mouth. And he didn’t even know I could hear.
A bat to the knee.
That’s too far.
I startle when someone knocks on our front door. I’m in bed, but I kept my bedroom door open to hear what’s going on in the house. Being alone as the night is about to fall when the Silent Circle could be planning anything against my family isn’t exactly the most reassuring situation.
I press pause on the recorded Bluebeard ballet I had put on in the background and strain my ear to make sure I didn’t imagine anything. The knock resonates again, and I huff, getting out of bed hesitantly.
Can’t a girl scroll on her phone, fear for her life, and watch ballet in peace?
I jog down, messy bun bobbing on the top of my head.
“Hello?” I call from behind, before slightly pushing the curtain that hides the squares of windows by the door.
“Delivery for Ella Baker.” a flat voice calls back. I catch a man holding a golden box in his hand. There’s a black silk bow wrapped around it and a gold envelope that has my name in cursive.
Ugh. Couldn’t he have gotten the wrong house?
“Just leave it on the porch,” I say. And I wait until he’s gone to wrench the door open, grab the box, and slam it back, my heart racing.
With quick steps, I walk to our kitchen and put it all on the counter.
I know this kind of box. They usually hold beautiful designer dresses. But I haven’t had anything made.
I slide my thumb in the envelope, ripping it open to find a card. My heartbeat accelerates as I pull it out with a trembling hand.
Ella Baker,
After careful consideration, I have decided to personally invite you to the Dionysian Mysteries .
Under my command, you are to present yourself at the structure designed by Daedalus.
You will drink Circe’s wine and turn into who you truly are.
Find a husband, and you will become the patron goddess of lawful marriage.
Get caught by a god, and you will serve us as a goddess of lust.
The festival starts at sundown. You may not be late.
Yours,
Hades.
Hades? Who the hell is Hades? Could it be a nickname they use? Is that what Reeves is called within the Silent Circle?
I undo the silk bow and open the box to find exactly what I expected. A dress. But it’s not a designer dress. It’s a simple Greek-mythology style white dress. And as I pull it out to see its ankle-length, I also notice how see-through it is.
I got what I wanted.
Tonight, I will be initiated into the Silent Circle.
Tonight, I get to save my family.