Chapter 22
Chapter Twenty-Two
Ella
Diet Mountain Dew - Lana Del Rey
M y eyes snap open, anxiety already running thickly through my veins. I feel weird, hungover, and I know I did something wrong. I’m just not sure what yet.
“Pretty girl is awake.”
The voice tears a surprised gasp out of me as I turn to my left. Chris stands by the side of my bed with a towel around his waist and uses another to dry his dripping hair.
Fucking…fuck, God help me. This man is a work of art. His abs are prominent, even more distinct by the slight tan of his skin. He doesn’t need to flex his defined arms to make them bulge, the muscles hard from his strict exercising routine.
He takes care of himself, of his body, of everything. He’s harsh on himself, harsher than he is with everyone else, and that results in a flawless physique. The only thing that sticks out like a sore thumb is the wonky tattoo of a Jack Daniels bottle on his forearm. It’s tiny, thick, so ugly. A drunken mistake on a night in, drinking with his best friends at his house. I was there, taking care of the four of them while they were getting blackout drunk. Chris, Luke, Jake, and Rose. Rose tattooed that bottle on the four of them.
He fucked me that night when they all went to bed. He snuck into the guest room I was sleeping in, and I had to put my own hand on my mouth while he thrusted into me. His inhibitions were gone. He barely cared if anyone heard us. I should have let someone catch us that night. Maybe we would still be together.
Shit. No. I can’t go down this road again. I can’t break my own heart by thinking of how things could have happened.
I tear myself out of my own head and look up at him.
“Tell me we didn’t…”
“Again, you mean?”
“Yes. Again,” I huff.
The corner of his mouth tips up. “Not yet, Sweets. Get on your front.”
My heart drops to my stomach, a zap of electricity flickering down my spine and ordering me to give in.
Absolutely. Not.
Thank God for the voice of reason.
“Are you insane? Get out of my room. What are you even doing here? What time is it?”
“It’s 6 a.m., and I brought you back after you drank too much.”
I rack my brain, desperate for memories to hold on to. I remember him showing up in the game room. I remember shouting that the real daddy was here, and I cringe. How much more stupid can I get?
I look around the room, down at the robe that’s barely clinging to my body. Tightening it around me, another memory flashes of Chris feeding me while I was sitting on the side of the bed. My hair is damp. I must have showered too. Unless…
“Did you…” I swallow thickly. “Did you shower me?”
My eyes flick down to his Adonis belt leading to the obvious hard-on under the towel. I try to look away, but somehow my eyes keep going back to it, and it liquifies my insides.
“Only until you tried to get me to fuck you. I had to step away so you wouldn’t assault me.”
“Shut the fuck up.”
He cocks an eyebrow, carefully getting closer. I’m frozen on the spot, helpless as I watch him bring a hand to the back of my head. Gripping my hair, he twists until I’m wincing, having full control of my movements. He keeps me from going anywhere, from fighting. That fact alone has my pussy tingling. My nipples start aching, and I subconsciously push them forward.
“I’m going to say this for the third time. So heed my warning when I say, watch. Your. Language. ” He twists harder. “I don’t like foul words coming out of your mouth.”
With my neck strained, I struggle to gulp the air I suck in. I’ve never understood why, so I decide to finally take that leap and ask.
“Why?”
“Because that’s how your dad talked to you. All violence and insults. I hate it. That’s not an appropriate way to communicate with someone you love. I don’t want you to bring it into our relationship, our marriage, our family.”
“Marriage?” I choke. “F-family? Are you alright?”
“Uh-huh. Perfectly fine, thank you.”
His other hand parts my robe, and he taps the inside of my right thigh. They part on instinct, and the first thing I do when I realize is close my legs again. Or at least I try to, but I’m too late, his hand already cupping my pussy. He doesn’t part my lips, doesn’t try to push inside me. A simple power move to tell me he could do whatever he wants.
“What did I tell you when I came to pick you up yesterday?”
“I-I don’t remember,” I pant, lost as to whether I should completely let go or scream for help.
He shakes his head, disappointed. “Try harder. That I was going to bring you home, and then?”
Our conversation at his house comes back, tasting like acid at the back of my throat. My eyes must be wide because he notices the second I remember.
“Go on.”
“That you were going to take care of me,” I rasp.
“Check. What else?”
I squeeze my eyes shut. “Let me sober up.”
“Check. Anything else?”
I try to shake my head, but he tightens his grip. “Don’t lie.”
“Punish me,” I hiss from the pain.
He hums his agreement, and the sound rumbles through his chest. “You shouldn’t have let me into your room, Sweets. Look at you now, already dripping on my fingers when I’ve barely touched you. Eager for my cock when you still have a punishment to go through.”
“I was drunk,” I whimper.
“And I refused to give you what you wanted when you couldn’t think straight. But it’s sober you who’s wetting my fingers, pussy already begging for me.”
He lowers himself, purring in my ear. “Now get on your stomach, feet on the floor, and present your beautiful ass to me. ”
My heart beats harder, dancing along the bones that keep it caged. I look at him as he releases me, and my conscious mind even convinces itself I’m going to walk away. I’m going to run to Peach’s room and scream at her to get Chris out of the house.
By the time the whole scenario unfolds in my head, I’m lying on my stomach, bending over the edge of the bed, my toes pushing against the plush carpeted floor.
“Push up higher.”
It’s the mix of dominance and gentleness that gets me. I try to convince myself it’s the reason I do exactly as he says.
“Good girl. Put your hands by your head.” And I do that too, squirming with excitement.
“I’m going to spank you. You’re going to stay still and take it, and when I’m done, you’re going to apologize for letting Henry touch you. Because bad little girls apologize once they’ve learned their lesson. Is that clear?”
I lick my lips. “Y-yes,” I squeak.
“No more ‘Daddy’? You were so quick to use it yesterday. Don’t worry, I’ll get it out of you.”
The first slap lands, startling me. The second warms my skin. The third stings.
He keeps going, taking my breath away from the strength in his hits, making me wince and spreading prickling pain throughout my entire body. When he pauses to give me time to breathe, he presses his hand on my upturned pussy.
“Spread, baby.”
I whimper when I do, feeling the stickiness of my arousal and the heat going up my chest to my ears.
“Such a wet girl. So ready for me to sink my cock into you.”
“Chris…this isn’t…this isn’t right. ”
He pulls his hand away and slaps me on the pussy.
“Fuck!” I cry out, knowing perfectly it sounds more like a moan. The pleasure makes my legs shake, and I can’t take my next breath.
“Language.” This time, he slaps the skin where my ass meets my thigh, and I shriek. “How many times did I tell you to watch your mouth, huh?”
He spanks me in the exact same spot. “Answer me.”
“F-four. Please, it hurts.”
“I’m pretty sure that’s the point.”
I suck in a breath when his fingers spread my nether lips. “Chris…”
He chuckles mockingly. “Address me properly and it might get better for you.”
“Please.”
The next slap is harsher, almost making me jump, and yet I can feel the way my pleasure keeps pooling between my legs. He’s too good at playing with my body. But the way it renders me helpless is what feels the best.
I cry out when he slaps my pussy again, gentler. I can’t take the mix of pain and pleasure anymore, and out of nowhere, I’m pushing up again, completely on my toes. I’m silently begging him to give me more, hoping he sinks his fingers into my wet heat.
“Stay still.”
He shifts behind me, and a second later, a phone unlocks. “Your passcode is the date we broke up. Is that how much you need to remind yourself that you hate me?”
“I do hate you,” I grit out between clenched teeth.
That date is seared in my brain like a brand on cattle. I can hardly breathe when I think of the day he broke up with me. Peach made me put it as my passcode so I wouldn’t text him when I was at my lowest.
It worked. It hurt, but it worked.
“It didn’t take Henry long before exchanging numbers with you, I see. Were you planning on texting him today?”
When I don’t answer, he pinches my pussy lips together, making me cry out with need. “Answer me when I ask you a question.”
“No! Yes…I don’t know. Please…”
“Your pleas are useless until you address me properly.” Letting go, he spanks me hard on one ass cheek, then the other.
I need him to stop, or to keep going, to end the suffering but make it worse. I don’t know anymore.
My hands fist the sheets by my head, and I can’t stop the words from spilling from my lips.
“More…”
He slaps my pussy. “Do you get to make demands?”
I shake my head, but I still beg. I don’t get to make demands, but I can’t help them, especially when he taps my clit softly this time.
“No…please, harder.”
“Harder, what?” The heat in his voice is melting me.
“Don’t make me say it, please.”
He taps my clit again. It feels like a feather stroking my skin compared to what I need.
“Please, harder. Harder…”
“You’re almost there, baby. Say it for me.”
“Harder, Daddy!” I cry out. “Please… please , harder.”
He slaps me hard, making my whole body tremble as a moan escapes me. He does it again, and again, until I’m shaking with the need to come, rubbing my upper body against the bed to feel friction against my rock-hard nipples.
“Did you hear that, Henry? That’s how she’s meant to sound when you spank her. ”
My entire body freezes.
What?
I try to get up, but a hand grips the back of my neck, pushing me back down. Something lands on the mattress, right next to my head, and my eyes bulge when I see my screen showing a phone call. The name Postgrad Henry is in white letters against the black background from when drunk me saved it yesterday.
He called him. He fucking called him. And he’s on speaker too.
“Chris—aah.” My own moan cuts me off when he pushes two fingers inside me. “Shit,” I pant.
“Tell Henry what you call me, Sweets.”
He fucks me harder, his fingers pushing into my wetness and rendering me speechless for a second, but when he slows down, I give him exactly what he wants.
“Daddy,” I whimper. “Please…”
“Good girl. Now let him hear how you come on my fingers.”
He accelerates again, curling his fingers inside me, and detonating an explosion of pleasure. I try to bury my head in the mattress with the last of my resolve, but a hand pulls at my hair, and Chris’s calm voice reaches through the haze.
“I said let him hear. ”
His fingers disappear, quickly replaced by the tip of his dick at my entrance.
“Fucking asshole.” That’s all we hear from Henry, but still, he doesn’t hang up.
“I hate you,” I say numbly, throwing my hand behind me to attempt to slap him.
A split second later, the ex I loathe so much enters me in one long stroke, rendering me speechless as my mouth drops open in shock .
Grabbing my wrist, he pins it to my back.
“Say that again,” he growls.
“I h-ha—” He cuts me off with a thrust.
“Try again, Sweets. Scream how much you hate me. Henry didn’t hear you.”
I cry out when he pushes harder into me. “Too big…” I choke on my words.
“And yet look at your greedy cunt taking me so well.”
I melt on the spot. Chris, the perfect gentleman in public, saves crude words for the bedroom, and it gets to me in the best and worst way.
He pulls out, moving me until my whole body is on the edge of the bed, and I’m lying on my side, facing him.
My wetness coats his hard dick, and he slaps my cheek that’s not pressed against the bed. “Open.”
He pushes in the second my lips part. I don’t know if I was taking a breath or opening for him. I don’t want to know.
“Can you taste your hate, Sweets?”
He pushes deeper, and my heart races when he presses his hand against my cheek, holding me still.
When my gag reflex kicks in, he strokes my cheek. “A little more,” he growls. Deeper…deeper, and before I know, I can’t breathe.
Panic zaps through me, making me wriggle in his hold.
He pulls out, letting me choke on a breath, and pushes back in, groaning when I caress the underside of his cock with my tongue.
Chris’s eyes dart to the phone next to my head. I can hear the lust in his voice when he talks to Henry. “Ella has something to tell you.”
He puts the phone by my mouth, but there’s nothing I can do except whimper from the need to breathe, so he pulls the phone back to himself.
“My bad. She can’t speak with my dick down her throat, but I think she meant to say she doesn’t want to see you again. Whatever little thing you think you’d start, it’s over.”
Hanging up on Henry, he throws the phone on the bed and stares down at me.
“I’m glad we got this out of the way.” With a soft smile, he thrusts inside my mouth.
He picks up the pace, throwing his head back as I wrap my lips tighter around him, not thinking what the hell pushed me to do that. Rolling his hips, he pulls halfway out, then explodes on my tongue.
I try to move my head, but he holds me in place, looking down at me. Standing tall, he caresses my cheekbone with his thumb. “Swallow.”
My half attempt at pulling away from him only earns me another thrust deep down my throat. So, I swallow him and the shame. He makes it difficult on purpose, staying in my mouth while I do what he tells me.
His eyes flutter shut, more pleasure taking over him. He moves his hand on my face, collecting the drop that spilled from my lips and is currently tracing its way down my cheek and toward the mattress. Pulling his dick out, he pushes his cum back into my mouth, and tears prickle at my eyes.
Why does he enjoy dragging out embarrassment? What kind of sick thrill does it bring him? The same humiliating kind it brings me?
I curl my tongue around his thumb, and he smirks. “I like you no matter what, but I enjoy you so much better when you behave like a good girl.”
I take a breath, soaking in what barely sounds like praise. Is that how desperate I am to have anyone say something good about me?
“Now say ‘sorry, Daddy’ for letting Henry touch you.”
“Sorry, Daddy,” I rasp.
“You’re forgiven, my perfect girl.”
Everything is falling apart around me. Chris is pushing away the men who get anywhere near me. I’m a whore for the Silent Circle, my reputation in shambles, I got kicked off the cheer team and out of my sorority. My family are pariahs.
Chris’s words…they feel good.
Am I so broken I’ll lap up anything this man offers?
He finally steps back. Helping me sit up, he doesn’t say anything when I push him away.
“Leave me alone,” I hiss.
He gives me space when I slap his hand. The one trying to wipe the tears falling down my face.
And thankfully he stays quiet. Without a word, he puts his clothes on, runs a hand through his hair, and takes the empty glass from my bedside table.
“No!” I panic when he leaves the room. I rearrange the bathrobe, rushing to cover myself and practically cut off my breath as I tighten the belt around my waist. “Don’t go to the kitchen. Alex wakes up really early. She’s probably down there.”
His eyebrows pull together slightly in that stupidly cute way when he’s confused. “Why is that a problem?”
“She’ll think we had sex or something, idiot.”
He pinches his lips together, but that’s not enough to hide his mocking smile, so he runs a hand against his mouth before he collects himself. “We did have sex…or something .”
Narrowing my eyes at him, I stride on shaky legs before snatching the glass from him with my left hand and pointing at my window with the right.
“Window. Out. Now.”
He lets out a sharp laugh. “I’m out of love hearts, and you need sugar. I wanted to get you a glass of orange juice. I’m not going anywhere until I’ve done that. Then we can discuss my exit.”
“No.” I shake my head because my words rarely stick to his brain. “No aftercare. I don’t want this from you. I’m not giving you any more from me.”
He takes his time mulling over what I said. Reaching for a lock of my messy blonde hair, he rolls it around his index finger and tugs slightly.
“Don’t deny me.”
A calm order. A soft threat.
And since he doesn’t want to hear me, as usual, I have to slap him with a truth bomb I can barely acknowledge myself.
“Chris, I told you to leave me alone. What we did yesterday…today.” I gulp, bringing a hand to my chest. “That was wrong. So wrong. Megan…”
Like a soldier ready for war, his face tenses. As if confronted with the name of the enemy. I recognize the effect it has on him. I used to feel the same when someone talked about my father.
“You seem to forget you’re an Aphrodite, Ella. Megan a Hera. And I’m a Shadow. I get to use you, and Megan gets to shut up.”
My heartbeat doubles from the brutality of his statement. He reminded me of my place in our hierarchy with a few words. “That doesn’t mean it’s right to…” It feels wrong on my tongue, and I can’t manage to say it .
“To cheat? I can take that blame easily, without any remorse.”
I can’t hide my surprise. This doesn’t sound like him. Cheating is the last thing I would expect a man like Chris to do.
“Does that have anything to do with the deal you have with her?”
He pauses, looks deep into my eyes, and his features soften. “It would do you good to forget about what you think you heard, Sweets. In fact, I’d go as far as saying it would keep you safe.”
I startle when his phone rings, the sound cutting through the tension in the room.
Chris lets go of me, a low growl rumbling in his chest as he takes his phone out of his pocket. My lungs feel like they’re swallowing water when I catch the name on the screen.
Megan.
He keeps his eyes on me, not even bothering greeting her as he picks up. Her voice is like a hissing snake. It’s not loud, but I hear it so clearly even though the phone isn’t on speaker. She’s furious, spitting poison through her fangs.
“ You had a birthday party and didn’t invite me? And then you didn’t fucking come home? ”
“Sounds like what happened.”
I can’t seem to associate Chris’s current tone with the man I know. His voice is empty like his soul is completely separated from the conversation.
“ Where are you, Chris? ”
“Out.”
“ I could strangle you when you talk to me like that. You better be home by the time breakfast is ready. And don’t ever do this to me again. Know your fucking place. ”
My eyes widen, a fear I don’t understand thickening my blood, making my heart work twice as hard to pump energy through my body.
He hangs up, his empty eyes still on me. He looks pale, and he’s fisting his phone so tightly I wonder if it’ll snap in half under his strength.
“Are you…” I hesitate. “Okay?” Fuck. Why do I care?
Slowly stepping toward me, he leans down and drops a soft kiss on my forehead. “I’ll see you soon, Sweets. Who knows, maybe at the temple, where I can have you all to myself and no one can bother me.”
The split second of understanding for his current situation runs out, and I feel my face harden. “I’m not the same girl from high school, and we’re not dating. You have my body. That’s it.”
He cocks an eyebrow, not believing the words that spurt out of my mouth. “Excuse me?”
I square my shoulders and tighten the robe again around my body. “You said it yourself, I’m an Aphrodite. You get to use me whenever you want. Sure.” I narrow my eyes at him. “But you will never have me the way you did back then. I don’t know this man you’ve become. And I don’t want him in my life, least of all to give him my heart.”
A statue of a mythological god has more life than Chris at this moment. His body stills, his face so frozen I wonder if it might crack into a state of fury.
He doesn’t move, and his words are a low threat as he answers.
“I will make you regret every single word you dared put in that sentence, Ella. I don’t want to escalate this to a level you can’t take. But you know I will if I have to.” He doesn’t even touch me, only staying a hair’s breadth away from me.
“You might want to pretend you’ve moved on, but I know what I want, Sweets. I want you. I want us. Megan?” He chuckles like he doesn’t have a problem in the world. “She’s just one little battle in the war I’m waging to get back to you. And the best things are worth fighting for.”
“And my brother?” I rasp. “And the Circle? And my opinion ? You want something I’m not willing to give.”
He drops another light kiss on my cheek. The kind that makes me shiver. That makes me want to press harder against him. Drop to my knees. Worship him.
“One step at a time. But trust me, the least of my worries is what you’re willing to give. I’ll just take.” Tilting his head so he can talk in my ear, he adds, “You will go to bed one night, and it will be me you sleep next to. You will wake up, and it’ll be my cock deep inside you. You will live, because I’m the one who allows oxygen into your lungs.”
He shifts, grazing my lips with his, and I don’t dare move an inch. I’m incapable of taking a step back.
“And my hand will be so far inside your chest, your heart won’t beat without feeling my grip around it.”