Chapter 4
Chapter Four
Wren
Family Line – Conan Gray
T he SUV stops in front of the gates while the driver waits for them to open. Silver Falls University is only a half-hour drive from Stoneview, but it feels so freeing to be over there and not in this suffocating town.
Growing up surrounded by other billionaires took away our sense of reality. When you understand you’re invincible, that the rules of the world don’t apply to you, it does something to your developing brain. Now we’re all grown. We moved to the college only we can access, away from the parental supervision that was already minimal. And we get crazier by the minute.
The whole situation is claustrophobic.
Born in Stoneview, your pampered peers’ biggest problem is the Wi-Fi that didn’t work on their yacht during the summer break. Attending Stoneview Prep, the important thing is to be the most something in a sea of people who believe themselves exceptional. Graduate, get into the best elite college in the country. Move into a beautiful house on SFU campus that costs more per semester than the average citizen’s salary. And in exchange for a lavish life and living above everyone else…just do what you’re fucking told .
It's no wonder I have a need to dominate everything, to be the decision-maker, the one who makes the rules. I’m just catching up on a lifetime of all decisions being taken away from me.
The car snakes all the way up the interminable driveway that’s typical to Stoneview mansions. It gives the owners privacy like nowhere else. Especially where my family lives in the hills. No one knows what happens inside our house. Ever.
“Thank you, Henry,” I say as our driver stops the car in the circular driveway. Right between the fountain and the front door so there’s minimal effort to get inside the house once we’re out of the car.
“Of course.”
Tension stiffens the muscles in my neck as I look at the front door through the tinted window. I stretch it from side to side, wishing for once in my life I could feel anything else but a dire need for murder when it comes to this house.
“Don’t go anywhere,” I add. “I won’t be long.”
It’s Elijah sitting next to me who answers. “You don’t even know what we’re here for. Don’t keep the man waiting. It’s late.”
I close my eyes, begging for patience to take over the fury that makes my blood boil every time my brother opens his mouth.
I don’t acknowledge him, locking eyes with our driver through the mirror. “I won’t be long,” I repeat with a soft smile.
He nods, and I finally open the door. I dust off my black jeans and take in the grandeur of the Hunter mansion. Such a big house, yet there was never anywhere to hide from my father. No place in there he wouldn’t find me.
“My baby,” my mom coos as Elijah and I walk in, our butler already grabbing my jacket while she hugs her favorite son.
She turns to me after the overly affectionate hello. “Wren,” she says softly, barely enough of a smile left on her face to look welcoming as she squeezes my upper arm.
It’s not a cold greeting, necessarily. She’s not being mean or detached, but the difference would be painful to anyone who isn’t used to it. After twenty-two years of this shit, it barely affects me anymore.
It's not that my mother doesn’t love me.
She's scared of me.
“Come, come.” She turns back to the entrance hall, her heels clacking against the marble. “Your dad is in his office, but he’ll be out in a minute. I had Nicole make your favorite. Roasted pork shoulder and vegetables.”
Elijah’s favorite.
I run a hand over my face, unsure I can push through the bullshit for an entire dinner.
“Why did Dad ask us to come?” I ask as we walk into the dining room, and I roll my eyes.
Was it really necessary to have a king’s banquet served here when we’re not even supposed to stay over?
Elijah is already sitting down in his usual spot. “This looks so good, Mom. Thank you so much.”
“She didn’t make it,” I mumble to myself as I stop behind my chair. There’s no way I’m sitting down. “I can’t stay for dinner. I have a thing.”
“What thing?” Elijah asks, the pretense of innocence accentuated by his wide brown eyes as he looks up at me.
“Dinner with friends. You wouldn’t know what that’s like.”
“Wren,” my mom scolds. “Be kind.”
“Peach didn’t mention any dinner with you,” he insists.
“No.” I chuckle to myself, shaking my head and begging my body to stay calm. “Don’t even let her name leave your mouth.”
My mom stands next to Elijah’s chair as she fills his plate with vegetables, choosing to ignore my threat. “You still like honeyed carrots, don’t you, my love?”
“I think I just puked in my mouth,” I snort as my brother blushes from our mom’s stupid endearment for him.
My love. Like he’s still a five-year-old who needs reassurance.
“How’s Penelope?” she asks cheerily.
“She’s fine.”
Time stops as Elijah and I look at each other. We answered at the same time, both assuming if our mom asked about Peach, we would be the best person to update her.
I keep a straight face, swallowing back the need to rearrange my brother’s smile, and look at my mom again.
“She’s fine,” I repeat.
But he can’t leave it there. He has to insist. “I had brunch with her yesterday, and she’s looking forward to presenting her research paper to the head of her department. She worked really hard on it and wants to use it for her postgrad application.”
My eyes narrow on him as he starts digging into his food, my hands tightening on the back of the oak chair in front of me.
“She’s such a smart young lady. Her dads must be so proud of her. What’s her research about?”
Elijah’s eyebrows pinch as he bites into his meat. “Umm…” He chews harder, talking with a mouth full. “Nano-something for the environment? She wants to save trees.”
“Environmental science and engineering applications of nanocellulose-based nanocomposites,” I answer in one breath, my eyes still on him. Did he really reduce her hard work to she wants to save trees ? “She’s researching ways to create paper, film, and fibers without destroying the environment. It could change everything we mass produce in the world. It could quite literally save the planet.”
He pauses his disgusting chewing and swallows thickly. “Alright, Einstein. I knew that. I was trying to make it simple for Mom.” Acting disappointed, he shakes his head. “Everything has to be a competition with you, Wren. It’s exhausting.”
Our mother jumps to his defense right away. “He’s not wrong, Wren.” She taps Elijah’s shoulder, weirdly standing behind him while he eats. “Thank you, my love. I get it. And it’s a very noble cause. Good for her.”
I bite my inner cheek, smile at my mom, and nod. “So, why are we here?”
“God, is it a crime for a mother to want to see her sons?”
“When you want to see your sons, Elijah is usually enough. So why are we here?”
Struggling to look offended at my remark, she doesn’t even deny it.
“Sit down.” My father’s southern drawl invades the room, putting an end to our conversation. He walks straight to his seat at the head of the table without so much as a hello.
“I’m not staying,” I explain calmly, releasing the chair so he doesn’t see my unease. “What do you need?”
“Did you not hear me the first time, boy?” he snaps, not even looking at me as he settles his napkin on his lap. “You’re going to sit down, spend time with us, and enjoy the dinner your mother made.”
“ Had made,” I huff.
“ Sit. Down. Wren . ” The flicker of violence in his tone kicks a survival instinct inside me. One Elijah never had to learn.
My jaw tightens as I pull out the chair and sit down. Once I’ve put a slice of bread on my plate to give myself something to do, I look at him again.
“So, why are we here?”
“Initiations are in two weeks.”
I pretend to relax against the back of my chair, but when my gaze crosses with Elijah’s excited one, there’s absolutely nothing about me that stays relaxed.
My family has been part of an elitist secret society for generations. When powerful people find a way to keep control of everything, they don’t let it go. That’s what the Silent Circle does. It’s a pool of unstoppable billionaires incessantly moving in a circle of favors. Politicians, tech titans, Big Pharma, and all their friends. And of course, the supermajors of the oil industry, including Monty Hunter. For every step they take legally, there are ten others they take on the wrong side of the law.
In two weeks, my brother and I are supposed to initiate into the Silent Circle. But to do so, every prospect has to bring a woman with them. They go through their own rite of passage, and by the end of the night, they get a place within the Circle. Not always the one they hoped for, though.
“I can’t initiate.” I shrug, playing with the piece of bread on my plate. I was starving before I came here, but seeing my family always makes me lose my appetite.
“You’re going to, Wren. You have to.”
“I don’t have anyone to bring to the initiations.”
“Yeah, because she’s dead,” Elijah snorts.
“That’s not my fault, is it?” I grunt, running a hand across my face. “But I know the rules. If I want to become a Shadow in the Silent Circle, I have to bring a woman to the initiations.” I smile to let him know he’s not affecting me as much as he thinks he is. “I don’t have a woman to bring.”
“Do you know what’s funny,” Elijah keeps going. “That you’re the only one in this family who’s always categorically refused to join the Circle. And just like that, the girl who would have allowed you to become a Shadow, conveniently died.”
Narrowing my eyes on my brother, I clench my jaw. “I did not kill Ania Livingston.”
The men who initiate into the Silent Circle can only become one thing. A Shadow. Initiated Shadows get to keep their lavish lifestyle and more, have access to other members and the favors they can offer. They’re also given a position within the Circle. One they can’t refuse. They take on a role within the Circle that the board decided for them. My friend, Chris, for example, will be a corporate attorney for them once he graduates. He’ll take care of all their big companies, and the mergers they finalize once they swallow smaller ones.
I have no problem with the position they want to give me. But I have a problem doing it for them. I don't have a choice but to join, but as far as I know, not having a woman to bring to initiations is my only way to delay it.
The woman we bring with us can have one of two roles within the Circle. Neither I wish on anyone I love.
I look at both my father and brother, only now realizing my mother has disappeared. Of course, we wouldn’t want her involved in the family business.
“Last time I checked, you didn’t have anyone to bring,” I tell Elijah. “Did you bring back one of your girls from the South of France?” I can’t help the disgust dripping from my voice.
Elijah will be following the exact same steps as my father in the Circle. And their role is worse than the one they’re trying to stick me with.
“I’ve got someone.” His smirk truly tempts me to jump over the table and wipe it off his face with my fist. He’s clearly bringing someone he likes.
“Who? You do know it doesn’t mean she’ll be your Hera. Anyone could have her.” I lean forward. “Me, for example.”
Bringing a woman doesn’t mean she’s the person we’ll end up with once we’re initiated. The women have to go through initiations, and they can end up as either a Hera—someone who will, down the line, become the wife of a Shadow. They’re stuck with the same man for the rest of their lives, forced to be faithful to a fucker who considers them nothing more than an accessory to their legacy. But they have power in the world. Being a Hera to a Shadow grants you anything you want, as long as your husband allows it.
If they don’t become a Hera, then they’re an Aphrodite. To put it simply, an Aphrodite is a whore for the Circle. They become toys for the Shadows. Women they can freely cheat on their Hera with. The principle is that Shadows are only allowed to play with them rather than women outside of the Circle. The society is so secretive, they wouldn’t want a vengeful woman to have something to hold over a Shadow’s head. Having the Aphrodites means the men can enjoy any sick fun they want without worrying about the consequences of the Circle being outed.
There are always more women initiating than men, meaning not everyone can become a Hera. They have to fight for it. And once you come to the initiations, there’s no turning back. You become a Hera or an Aphrodite, but you can never leave the Circle. Not alive.
Women still come. They know that, and they try their chances. Money, power, it makes people do crazy, stupid things. Sometimes they do it out of love, tricked by their boyfriend into thinking they’ll automatically become their Hera. But more than that, even if they become an Aphrodite, they get one favor from the Circle without having to pay it back. Every single Aphrodite gets her one favor. No matter what it is.
A job you’ve been dreaming of? Done.
A spot in your dream grad school? You got it.
Killed someone? They’ll hide the body.
Want someone killed? They’ll take care of it.
Anything. Is. Possible.
And desperation? It makes people do the craziest, most stupid things. Like initiate for the Silent Circle.
“Are you going to initiate just to steal my Hera, Wren?” My brother lets out a loud cackle. “Is that how much you want to humiliate me now? School, social life. Stoneview, Silver Falls. I’m already a pariah at SFU, and classes haven’t even started. So, now the Circle too?”
“Me being better than you at everything isn’t a personal persecution, Brother. It’s just a fact.”
“You’re better than him at things that don’t mean anything.” My father’s voice isn’t loud, simply demeaning enough to shut me up. “Prove yourself within the Circle and you’ll matter.”
I pause for a minute, jaw tight, fist clenched on my lap. My eyes roam over his face. This man hates me. Proving myself won’t change anything. It’ll just be useful to him and his Shadow friends.
Standing up, I nod at him. “I don’t have anyone to bring. I’m not initiating. Next year, maybe. Thanks for dinner.”
I wipe my hands of the crumbs, and my dad's eyes dart to my plate with a destroyed piece of bread on it. He stays silent until I’m just about to cross the door, out of the dining room.
“I’ve got someone. She’ll be there. You just have to show up.”
Freezing, I barely find the strength to look over my shoulder. “What?”
“You heard me. There’s a woman who will initiate for you.”
“Who?”
“What, who. You’re suddenly so interested.” Elijah snorts.
“Shut the fuck up.” I point a threatening finger at him as I finally turn around, giving my dad my full attention. “You found some poor woman who needs a favor so badly, she’ll do anything, including initiating at the risk of becoming a whore for you and your buddies. Who is she?”
“She might become your Hera, who knows.” My father shrugs, biting into his food for the first time tonight. The fucker is so at ease now that he got me riled up.
“If she runs fast enough,” Elijah adds.
They both laugh, not caring one bit that someone is about to put their life at risk for their benefit.
“Who is she?” I repeat.
Swallowing, my father waves his fork. “Don’t worry about her. Just know she’ll be there.”
Sounds about as shady as everything I expect from him.
My mom steps back into the dining room, meekly walking to my dad until she drops a kiss on his cheek like the brainwashed little Hera she is.
“It’s getting late, Monty. The boys should go back. They have classes tomorrow.”
He nods, his chin jutting toward the door. “Get some rest, will you. Work hard. Get ready for initiations. I’ll see you in two weeks.”
I’m the first one to leave, without a goodbye to anyone. My mother won’t care as long as her baby boy gives her a big kiss and a tight hug.
I only talk to Elijah once we’re on the highway to Silver Falls.
“Who’s the girl you’re bringing?” I ask.
“You’ve become so curious about my life.” He chuckles. “You’ll see in two weeks.”
“Let me rephrase.” I turn to him, a condescending smile breaking through the corner of my mouth. “Who could possibly want to initiate for you? No one likes you.”
“Yeah, you keep making sure of that, don’t you?” he snarls, his face turning red quickly. “Is Hermes a good friend of yours? Is that why they posted about me the second I set foot on campus?”
“You’re fucking paranoid.” I roll my eyes. “I have no idea who Hermes is.”
“And yet, isn’t it so convenient that everyone at SFU doesn’t want to associate with me? Same as Stoneview Prep. Same as any space I have to share with handsome, smart, superior Wren Hunter.”
“Glad you know where you stand compared to me.”
His face twists with anger, making him even uglier than usual. Truth is, my brother isn’t horrendous to look at. He could easily date pretty girls if his social skills weren't so non-existent.
“You know,” he seethes. “There is one girl on campus who doesn’t look down on me. Who isn’t stupid enough to believe the shit you tried to spread about me.”
“I’m not spreading anything. Hermes is an anonymous account. They’re trying to piss you off—” I stop myself as something finally catches up with me. “Wait.”
I take a few seconds to process what he just said, the way he used it in our conversation.
“Tell me it’s not Peach.”
“You know she’s the only one who doesn’t buy into the bullshit of ‘Wren is the perfect Hunter brother and Elijah is the loser no one should be friends with.’”
“And you know that’s not what I fucking meant.” His fake innocent smile is getting to me, but I keep a steady voice. “You’re not bringing Peach to the initiations…”
Refusing to answer, he blinks at me.
“Are you?” I push out between clenched teeth.
“I thought you and her were best friends. Surely, she would have told you if I was bringing her.”
Clarity fights through the hate for my brother, and my shoulders relax.
“You’re not.” I chuckle, seeing through his lie. “Peach would never agree to that shit. She has two brain cells to rub together. Unlike you.”
“Sure, Wren.”
I watch as he casually looks ahead, considering the conversation over.
“Look at me,” I snap. When he refuses, I can’t help myself. I grab him by the collar, pulling him toward me until his seat belt practically chokes him. He brings a hand to my wrist, the other to loosen the seat belt, but there’s not much the weak man can do.
“Do. Not. Touch her.” His smile doesn’t go away in the slightest. “I swear to God, Elijah. Stay away from Peach, or I’ll fucking end you.”
“Maybe it’s Peach. Maybe it’s not. The best part is you won’t know until initiations because you can’t ask her without exposing the Circle. That’s a deadly offense, Brother.”
“If I show up to initiations and Peach is there, you’re a dead man.”
“There he is. Wren the big, bad murderer. Are you going to snap?”
My heartbeat accelerates from the accusation. The hint of a flashback narrows my vision before I come back to the present. I crack my neck, attempting to calm myself without success.
“I’m not a murderer,” I whisper. If I try to speak louder, I’ll sound threatening again, and then he’ll be right.
“That’s not what the law says.” He chuckles. “Come to the initiations, find out who I brought, and we’ll see how you react.”
I tighten my grip on his shirt, my gaze roaming over his face to gauge if he’s bullshitting me. No clues. No indication on whether he’s bringing her to become part of a dangerous secret society.
And then I let go.
“Peach wouldn’t,” I say, trying so hard to convince myself.
“Ah, well. Desperation, Wren. It’s a powerful thing.”
“She isn’t desperate. She’s not weak. She wouldn’t trust a fucker like you blindly.”
He shrugs, but the conversation is cut short by our driver parking in the visitor lot of Silver Falls University.
“Who should I drop first?” he asks, looking into the rearview mirror.
Whereas I live in a campus house, Elijah lives in the dorms. He just came back and has no friends to share a house with.
“Don’t worry about me,” I say as I open the door. “I need a walk anyway.”
Leaving the parking lot, I walk past the red-brick castle and toward the woods of our beautiful campus. They lead to the residences.
The air is cool, calming my heated body.
They always get to me.
I take a deep breath. The earthy smell of the bald cedars surrounding me grounds me.
They always get to me.
They always get to me because they’re the ones who created the weaknesses inside me. The monster. The one who shows up when I snap.
And they’re desperate to use him for the Circle.
My mind is back in my body, but my heartbeat still hasn’t calmed, and I know only one thing will help.
The same thing I had planned before being forced to go to my family’s house. The same thing I do most nights of the week. Every fucking night when I need to appease myself.
I finally come out of the woods, excitement brewing in my stomach. My heart quickens once more as I get near my house. It’ll ease in a minute, once the rush is gone and I’m sure I’m not getting caught.
When I get to my porch and take a left, I slow down my eager steps, sliding between the two walls that separate mine and Achilles’s house from our best friends’. I drag my hand against the wall of the girls’ house, until I’m near their backyard and push past the exact spot where their wall meets their hedge. With time, it’s become easier and easier, the hole practically the shape of my body. It barely even scratches my skin anymore.
I bend my knees, jumping high enough to catch the bottom of the above balcony, and easily pull myself up. There’s a reason I crush everyone in any sport. I work hard. But mainly to be able to do this exact movement with ease. Her balcony is eleven feet above the ground, and I'm six-five. I put the bar in my home gym at exactly eleven feet so I can train every morning to jump that height and pull my weight. I could do this all night long and not break a sweat. I can come and go as I please when it comes to this exact balcony.
I climb over the wooden balustrade and make my way to the French doors, taking out the key I always keep on me. If Peach knew I made a copy the second she moved in and chose her room, she would annihilate me. I make sure to look through the window to check she’s sleeping before opening the door discretely and sliding inside her room.
The rush of adrenaline dissipates the second I see her in the flesh. She’s breathing heavily, sleeping on her side and hugging her pillow like a teddy protecting her from the bad men who could sneak into her room at night.
I smile to myself. The covers are to her waist, one leg under and one leg out for the most comfortable temperature. Her satin sleeping shorts are black, hiking to the point that her perfect ass is showing underneath the hem.
She sighs, hugging her pillow closer, and my pulse finally goes back to normal. Some nights, I go around looking for things she hides in here and that I don’t want her to use. The Adderall she illegally buys from dealers on campus, the weed she smokes too often, the coke she sniffs on nights out. Some nights, I caress her cheek, smell her hair, take in the scent of rose and lychee that follows her everywhere, steal the pen I know she chews on when she’s working hard on her research and essays.
But most nights, like tonight, I sit on the floor right beside her bed, my back to the wall, and facing her. She mostly sleeps on her right side. Away from the door, facing the window.
So that’s where I sit tonight.
I catch the letter she left on her bedside table.
Dear Mom and Dad…
I stop myself from going any further, my heart fissuring for her. I know where this letter will go. In the box under her bed where she keeps all the other ones she wrote to her biological parents. I read a couple until I felt bad for not respecting her privacy. There's a side of Peach she won't show to anyone. Not even me, and it feels wrong to know about it.
Her insecurities lay deeply in the fact that she was abandoned when she was three, and that, to this day, she has no idea why.
Taking a deep breath, I rest my head against the wall. I look at my best friend, and it finally happens.
Everything. Stops.
The bad thoughts, the fear, the murderous feeling my family puts in me, the anxiety that comes with initiating into the Silent Circle.
It all disappears.
Suddenly, the air is light, the pain nonexistent, and everything quiets.
That’s the magical effect Peach has on me.
And if she has to become someone’s forever, it would not be my brother’s. If she has to initiate, it would be for me.
How easy would everything be if she became my Hera. If she was left without a choice but to be mine.