Chapter 6
Chapter
Six
MERRI
My dreamwalk with Pan had been illuminating, to say the least. While he didn’t physically resemble my Malice, he certainly shared a similar attitude.
Confident, capable, and filled with disdain for anything more than mildly inconvenient.
I just hoped my warning would be enough to help him with his escape.
Without knowing anything about his circumstances, there wasn’t much else we could offer.
It really was up to him. We’d done everything we could.
At least for now.
But that was yesterday’s problem. Something told me I was about to walk straight into today’s.
That something was a summons from Auntie Lilith.
She rarely demanded attention, instead taking it whenever she wanted it, but I’d woken to a notecard in her signature black stock that simply read My office. ASAP.
I couldn’t shake the feeling that I was a naughty schoolgirl heading to the principal’s office. Most people might think that an odd way to feel when going to visit a family member. But most people’s aunt wasn’t Lilith Duval, so they could kick rocks.
There was no telling what she wanted. A friendly chat, a mission of some kind, or worse . . . some sort of punishment for who knew what.
Only one way to find out, I supposed.
I hesitated at her office door, hand poised to knock when the sound of enthusiastic voices reached me from the other side. I say enthusiastic because I couldn’t quite tell if they were raised in anger or something else entirely. With my aunt and her fae prince, both were equally plausible.
“I don’t understand where this is coming from. It’s nothing they haven’t seen before,” Lilith said.
“Oh, really? Have they? That’s news to me, Lilypad.”
“If you think any of those men have never seen a bare breast, you haven't been paying attention.”
A low growl radiated from under the door. “It’s different when they are your breasts, darling.”
“Oh, pish posh. I walk around tits out all the time. In fact, you’ve accompanied me on more than one occasion. I distinctly recall you being quite the fan of my cupless corset and heart pasties.”
I caught Crombie’s muffled curse and then my aunt’s sharp inhale before his voice dipped low and he crooned, “Pasties are not nipples, Lilypad. In case you’ve forgotten, we have an agreement. Certain parts of you are for my eyes only. Do you need a reminder of which ones I’m referring to?”
Lilith’s soft huff of laughter had me taking a step back. I probably shouldn’t be eavesdropping on any of this.
“Save that thought for later, pet. We have company.”
I froze. Fuck. Before I could back away further from the door, it swung open, and I was face-to-face with Lilith’s bare breasts.
“Um . . . you wanted to see me?”
My aunt dipped down to pick up her black silk shirt and slipped it on as if this was a common occurrence and not arguably one of the most awkward in my life.
“Yes, darling. Do come in and take a seat.” She tipped her cheek up, angling toward Crombie.
“Give me a kiss, dearest, and then leave us girls be.”
The fae sighed before leaning down and obliging. “We’re not finished,” he murmured, and my usually unflappable aunt blushed the faintest pink.
I couldn’t stop my smirk at seeing this side of her.
She schooled her features and rolled her eyes as he started for the door, forcing me to move to the side or risk being bowled over.
“If you had it your way, we never would be,” she called after him.
He paused in the doorway, glanced at her over his shoulder, and winked. I swear she swooned as soon as he vanished down the hallway.
“He’s—” I began, but stopped when she leveled her gaze on me, all trace of emotion gone from her expression.
“Sit down, Meredith,” she ordered.
Any hope I’d had that this would be a pleasant meeting evaporated, and I immediately caught myself standing a bit straighter before shuffling toward the closest seat.
I even tucked my ankles demurely together and clasped my hands over my knees like some kind of debutante.
As if any of that would save me from what was coming.
“Something wrong, Auntie Lilith?”
She raised a perfectly sculpted brow. “Do you have any idea how many complaints I’ve fielded this morning, thanks to you?”
My stomach lurched. If there was one thing I hated, it was truly being in trouble. “Complaints? About what? I just got here. How can I have upset people already?”
“I might ask you the same question. Merri darling, really. How is it you still can’t manage to control your lust?
There’s a war on, you know. People can’t just stop in the middle of their planning to fuck it out on every available surface.
” Her lips twitched, and I realized she wasn’t actually upset with me at all.
“Truth be told, there were a couple of thank yous mixed in with the complaints. Sex is a great stress reliever, after all.”
My cheeks burned with embarrassment as I realized what had happened. My ménage-a-horsemen hadn’t gone unnoticed. In my lust-addled state, I’d accidentally dosed the entire compound with succubus pheromones.
Whoops.
“And the penny finally drops,” Lilith muttered.
“I didn’t realize it would spread. I wasn’t feeding.”
“Of course you didn’t. Lust is tricky. We must always be guarded when in the vicinity of others, especially you, pet. Your power is rooted in so much more than succubus magic.”
I nodded, eyes not quite able to reach hers.
“Far be it from me to tell a girl how to live, but we really can’t afford to be distracted all at once. Not with the final battle on the horizon. Someone has to stay out of the lust fog, or we will be vulnerable to attack.”
Sufficiently chastised, I mumbled, “Sorry, Auntie. I’ll try harder to keep myself in control.”
She tipped my chin up. “You are what you are, Merri. Your needs are important. I’m not telling you to deny yourself, or your mates for that matter.
Just be a little more careful, hmm? As delicious as an unexpected orgy can be, Drystan had a point.
Not everyone appreciates when others get an eyeful of their mate. Or mates, as the case may be.”
My blush deepened as I thought about Dahlia and Rosie caught out in the open with their men.
“Oh, dear God. I’ll do an apology tour as soon as I leave.”
“No need. Everyone assumed it was me.”
Shock lifted my brows. She took the blame?
“Glad that’s settled. Feel free to go about your business, darling. If you see Drystan, be a love and tell him I need him.”
And I’d been dismissed. She was so good at that. I stood to leave, but the urge to confess overwhelmed me, and I hesitated.
Shrewd blue eyes locked onto mine. “What are you keeping from me, niece?”
I bit down on my bottom lip, not sure where to start. There was no way she was going to be happy about what I needed to share.
“Something happened while I was with Luc,” I eventually managed.
Her brows lowered in concern, and she leaned against the edge of her desk, gesturing for me to continue.
“You’re not going to like it, but I need advice because I think I messed up.”
“Oh, lord above. Shall I pour myself a drink before you ruin my day?”
“Maybe?”
She straightened and turned for her bar cart. “Keep talking, best to get the hard part over with so we can get to the damage control. What did you do, exactly?” I think it might have been mercy on her part that she kept her back to me while I struggled with my confession.
“I bonded with Lucifer.”
She spun around, full glass in hand. “Is that all?” She laughed, pressing a palm to her chest. “Goodness, you had me worried.”
“What are you talking about? I’m mated to the literal devil.”
“Yes. I understand.”
“And that’s not a big deal?”
She took a sip of her drink before sitting on the edge of her desk. “Darling, it’s a boon. A mated man is an ally, not an adversary. Even if he wishes he could be.”
I opened my mouth to argue the point, but found that I couldn’t. I finally opted to ask for clarity. “So what are you saying?”
“Think about it. He can’t hurt you now. Not even if he wished to, which I highly doubt he would, given that the bond will make him naturally inclined to care for and protect you.
But for the sake of argument, even if he needed to hurt you to accomplish his lofty apocalyptic goals, the long and short of it is, he simply cannot. ”
“But I can’t hurt him either.”
“No.”
Her calm acceptance had caught me off guard. I’d expected her to be upset that I could no longer aid in the fight, but she seemed almost pleased about this turn of events.
Lilith might be pleased, but I knew four others who definitely would not be.
“What do I do about the horsemen? They’re going to be pissed.”
“They’ll see the benefit soon enough.”
“Do you think they’ll be mad that I accidentally brought someone else into our group?”
“I don’t think accident is the right word for this. I think it’s fate, and one thing those men understand better than anything is fate.”
“I only just got them back. I’m not sure my heart can survive another rejection.”
She stiffened, one brow lifting at my words. “What do you mean, another?”
Oops.
“It’s a long story, but in the past now. No need to rehash it.”
“Hmm,” she hummed, but I could tell she wasn’t fully convinced. The last thing any of us needed was my aunt avenging my honor and standing off against the horsemen. I wasn’t certain they’d survive the encounter, and I was pretty attached to them.
Them . . . and someone else.
Guilt weighed heavily on my heart as silence stretched between us. I knew very little about her past with Lucifer, but she’d always been clear about her dislike of him after their falling out. I admired Lilith. The last thing I wanted was for her to be disappointed in me.
“Darling, I can see you agonizing over something. Tell me what is on your mind. The time for secrets between us has passed.”
“It’s not just a forced bond and fate bringing us together, Auntie Lilith. I . . . want Lucifer. I want him to be mine. I don’t despise him even though I should. I crave him the same way I do the horsemen, and now that we’re apart, it feels like he’s missing from me.”
“And this is a problem, why?”
I laughed at the absurdity of her question. “Because this is impossible. The horsemen will never accept him. They see him as the enemy.” Another bubble of hysterical laughter escaped. “Everybody does.”
“For now, but only because that’s what he’s been to them since they found you. He has never been what one might call a team player. As for everybody else”—she lifted one shoulder in a graceful shrug—“fuck ’em. He’s your mate, dearest. The only person whose opinion matters is yours.”
My heart squeezed with apprehension at the idea of coming clean to my men. Lucifer knew about them, how much they meant to me, but they had no clue of the depth of my connection to him.
“Let me ask you this. I think the answer might help you put everything into perspective.”
I nodded, indicating I was ready.
But I should have known better. I was rarely ready for anything my aunt threw at me.
“Do you love him?”
I blinked at her, mumbling a few nonsensical noises before managing a strangled, “I don’t know.”
Her lips twitched with the most knowing of smiles.
“I think, dear heart, that you do.”
Sin
My chest fucking caved in as Lilith’s words hit me from my position outside her partially open door. Merri loved him. She loved Lucifer. Even worse, she was mated to him. It wasn’t the sudden addition to the team that bowled me over. It was that Merri hadn’t breathed a word of this. To any of us.
I stumbled away from Lilith’s office, my goal of tracking my mate down and bringing her back to bed long forgotten.
Why had she lied to us? To me?
And before you get all high and mighty, saying she didn’t lie, a lie of omission is still a lie.
Sharing a little detail like coming back to us with a brand new mate who is also the devil in the flesh seemed pretty important to me. If the tables were turned and I had something that life-altering to tell her, you bet my killer abs it’d be the first thing we talked about.
Sure, there were a few other things the five of us had needed to talk about, but even so, this should have been in the top three.
Fuck. I thought we’d repaired the rift, but clearly she still didn’t trust us. It was the only explanation.
A pit opened in my stomach as another realization hit me. I knew exactly how a mate bond was forged. I’d fucking lived it with Merri. They’d had sex. She’d had him inside her and couldn’t even tell us it had happened.
Did she think we would judge her? We knew what she was. Knew her nature and needs. She had to know there wasn’t anything we wouldn’t do for her. I mean, Grim might balk a bit, but he’d come around. But me? We were the same. She should know that I, even more than the others, would get it.
Unless . . .
That pit grew wider, and something more sinister took hold.
I wouldn’t put it past Lucifer to manipulate her for his own benefit.
Maybe he thought the bond would be a way to control her—and us—for his own gain.
What if he’d forced the mate bond? That would definitely explain why she didn’t want to talk about it.
That motherfucker.
If he raped her, I would fucking end him.
I didn’t care who or what he was. By the time I was through, he’d be little more than a red mist coating the walls.
My chest rose and fell in rapid breaths, and I hadn’t realized I’d come to a sudden stop in the hallway until I caught the nervous glances of other people. Forcing myself to take a calming breath, I resumed walking.
See? This is why she should have come to us first thing. Now I was doom spiraling and plotting an execution, and I didn’t even know if it was warranted.
I needed to talk to her. It was the only way I could get any kind of clarity.
I owed her that much. Did it hurt to know she hadn’t trusted us?
Yes. But had we done anything to truly earn complete trust from her leading up to this point?
No. We’d damaged so much between us before her time with Lucifer, it stood to reason she would be guarded.
Either way, I had to make sure Merri knew we were here for her, even if her distrust was hurtful. A sharp pain stabbed behind my breastbone as the truth settled there. We weren’t as connected as I thought. I was one-hundred percent certain of her, but she wasn’t fully certain of me.
Fuck.