Chapter Twenty-Nine
Millie
As soon as he closes his car door, I turn and ask him, "Do you really think it's possible?
I mean, you hear about ghosts and all, but I've never thought they're real, Rowan!
It's just some stupid stories that people make up.
There's no way it actually exists!" I'm rambling, I know it, but I can't help it. My mind is pretty blown right now.
He cranks the truck and turns up the heat, but he doesn't put it into drive. Instead, he turns towards me, his hand reaches out and cradles my cheek. "Take a deep breath for me, baby. It's okay. We're going to figure this out."
I tilt my head into his touch, craving every little bit he's willing to give me. "We don't know that. And if Lily isn't right, then what?"
"Then we keep digging," he says it so simply. We. Like we're going to figure it out together.
"You don't have to do this. This isn't your problem, Rowan." I want to make sure he knows that I don't expect him to stick around to figure this out.
He sighs, it isn't a sigh of frustration but one more of determination. "But see, that's where you're wrong, Daredevil."
My eyebrows pull together. "How so?"
He smiles, ever so patiently. "Because if it pertains to you, I'll make it my problem."
I shake my head. "Rowan, but this doesn't. We are friends."
He growls, "Would you stop saying that."
My head goes back in shock and confusion. "Are we not?"
"I don't want to be your friend, Millie."
It feels like all the air gets sucked out of the cab of his truck. My heart pounds so hard it feels like it's in my throat. It feels like I'm having a panic attack. What does he mean? He said he wanted to be friends! I open my mouth to respond, but he beats me to it.
"I want to be more than your friend, Daredevil."
My heart pounds out of my chest, bursting with a kind of excitement that I've never felt before, along with a hefty dose of anxiety. "What do you mean?" I whisper, scared that I'm jumping to conclusions, that I've mistaken his intent.
He smiles, and it's the most patient, most handsome smile I've ever seen. "I want to be your boyfriend, Millie St. James."
That's it. My breath ceases to exist. "Oh!"
My mind starts running at warp speed. The excitement from just moments ago starts to turn into something much more realistic.
As in, I remember who I am and who he is.
Me, the introvert that's never had a real friend, let alone a boyfriend, and him, the hockey god that's probably had more girlfriends than I can count.
"I don't understand. I thought we talked about this?
" I thought we were on the same page, but right now it feels like we're on completely different planets.
"We did," He answers, patiently. He still has that same endearing smile on his face that is surely meant to melt my heart. It's working so well that I have to look away in order to think straight.
"Nothing's changed."
"I disagree."
I blow out a breath of frustration. "Rowan," I say sternly because I feel like he isn't listening and decided to go and change the rules on me without me looking.
"Millie," he responds, his voice entirely too playful for my liking.
"I'm serious." This must be a practical joke. I'm just waiting for him to crack a smile and say, "Gotcha." As terrible as that would be, it would make more sense than him actually being interested in me. We have nothing in common, and I'm not the typical girl he dates.
I know because one night when I was na?ve and hopeful, I decided to look at his socials.
It was a decision I quickly regretted and also led to me having the "we're just friends" talk with him not that long ago.
Because it was girl after gorgeous girl.
None of which looked anything like me. Sure, on a good day I would describe myself as pretty, but I don't compare to the drop-dead gorgeous girls he has hanging on his arm night after night.
I had to safely place him in the friend category before he went and did it before me.
His smile turns into something more subdued but just as beautiful. His eyes turn molten, sincerity bleeding from his tone. "I am too."
"Why?" I ask, dumbfounded. Why now? Why me?
His eyes narrow slightly as he watches me. "What do you mean, why?"
"I mean, why me, Rowan?"
He tilts his head with confusion swimming in his eyes. "I don't understand."
I sigh in frustration. "Let's not pretend I'm your usual type." I put my hands up to air quote the last part.
There he goes, growling again. "Who says you aren't my type? Because from where I'm sitting, you are very much my type." He makes a show of adjusting his crotch. My eyes dart down with the movement and widen when I see the very prominent bulge in his pants.
He continues, but I can't seem to take my eyes off that bulge. My mouth waters and my core heats.
"Why not you? You're amazing, Millie. Smart, kind, funny, beautiful. The list goes on and on. If anything, you should be asking if I'm good enough for you."
He chuckles, and I feel a gentle touch at my chin. He uses his finger to push my chin up. "My eyes are up here, Daredevil." Once my gaze connects with his, he winks.
My cheeks heat with embarrassment. "Sorry," I whisper.
"Don't ever apologize, baby. You can look all you want, but right now I need your eyes." His soft command has my core melting at an alarming speed.
I shake my head. "I really don't understand, but it doesn't matter because this is too much." I suddenly feel very overwhelmed. I'm still trying to wrap my head around the conversation with Lily and Luka at dinner, and now this. I can't process all of this at once.
"It's okay. We don't have to decide anything tonight. You can take as long as you need. I just want to make one thing clear."
"What's that?"
"My intentions."
"Your intentions?" I repeat like the dummy that I feel like.
There goes that patient smile again. "My intentions to date you, Millie," he spells out plainly and slowly so I can understand.
The best that my brain can come up in response is, "Okay."
"Okay," he answers in turn, that handsome smile back on his face.
I reach for the door handle because it feels like my brain is going to explode from stimulation overload.
Right before I push the door open, he says, "Come to my game tomorrow night."
His soft command halts my movement. "Come again?"
"Tomorrow night's a home game. I'm sure Lily and Stella are coming, so you will have someone to sit with."
I feel so off-kilter from everything that's happened tonight, but there is a flicker of excitement that starts low in my belly, becoming stronger and stronger as the seconds tick by.
I really did love watching that game with him, and I bet it's even more exciting to watch him play. I try not to overthink my answer. "That sounds fun."
If I thought his smile was perfect before, the one covering his face right now tops it by a million. "Yeah?" he sounds like a kid that just got told he could buy whatever he wants in the candy shop.
"Yeah," I confirm, my own smile growing.
"Stay right there," he says excitedly as he hastily opens his door and jogs around the front of the truck to my side. He opens my door and reaches his hand in to help guide me out.
I laugh. The gesture feels kind of silly, but I kind of love it. "Thank you, sir."
He bows his head playfully. "It is my pleasure, ma'am."
He leans in like he's going to kiss me. Butterflies suddenly flare in my belly, coming to life at feverish speed. Just before he reaches my lips, his head turns to the side, connecting with my cheek in the sweetest torture. I melt under his touch just the same.
I can't imagine what it would feel like for his lips to connect with mine. An image and feeling I've fantasized about more times than I care to admit to myself.
"Good night, Daredevil."
The way he says my nickname has my core turning into straight lava, all hot and gooey.
"Good night, Rowan."
He watches until I'm safely inside before slowly pulling away from the curb.
I'm not ashamed to admit that I watch his truck drive away until he's completely out of view.