Chapter 28
Adam
Missing my Lovely Lucy already. Festival feels like it’s really lacking something when you’re not around.
tbh everything is lacking when you’re not around
I’ve been watching the weather report, please drive safely.
kind of regretting telling you to run off
Stepping into the cabin was always like stepping into the past. The cabin had been in the Rhodes’ family since Grandma had been a little girl and the latest remodel had been done in the ’80s. The couch was powder blue and worn-in, the ground a bright, pink, fuzzy carpet, and the kitchen had a fridge and microwave that looked older than my mom. It had a gas stove we had to light ourselves. Everything was rustic and wooden with framed photos of our family throughout the generations.
I let myself fall onto the couch with a loaded sigh. It smelled vaguely of Grandma’s powdery, floral scent from all the years she sat in this very spot. For a moment, I was wrapped up in her arms again, inhaling the White Shoulders perfume she always wore.
Olivia was sitting on the other end of the couch and Gracie was on the loveseat caddy corner to me, her bandaged foot resting in Mom’s lap.
“You made it,” Mom said happily, all three of her girls in the same room.
“How was the drive? Seems like you came in with the storm,” Olivia said as the rain thrummed against the windows.
I pulled a nearby plush blanket over my lap. “It wasn’t too bad. It really started to pour as I got closer to the cabin.”
“I made some barbecue chicken earlier if you want a plate,” Mom offered. “I also boiled some sweet corn.”
“There’s also so much watermelon in the fridge,” Gracie said.
I made a plate with sticky sweet drumsticks and buttery corn on the cob. I ate in the living room while Gracie gave me the update on her recovery and her plans for the rest of the summer—which was really that she had no plans for the rest of the summer.
“But, guys, I’ve been so MIA since the end of May I need to hear what I’ve missed,” she pleaded with her hands to her chest. “Give me the details, please.”
Olivia and I exchanged loaded glances.
“Just the festival over here.” I shrugged, carrying my plate back to the kitchen.
“Just renovations here,” Olivia said from her spot on the couch.
“Lies,” Gracie shouted as I walked back into the living room. “Mom gossips enough for me to know you’re both leaving out very important details.” She wiggled her shoulders. “Sizzling details.”
“There has been no sizzling here,” Olivia said, her face blank.
I leaned on the doorway. “Well, fine, there has been some sizzling for me.” I bit my lip before confessing. “Especially at your apartment.”
“I knew it!” Gracie just about leaped off the couch, her cast the only thing holding her down.
“Your pool at night was surprisingly romantic…” I said, my cheeks pinker than the carpet.
“This is what my bored, stuck at home self has needed.” Gracie was almost more excited than I was. “Tell me every juicy detail, stat.”
I walked back into the living room, their eyes on me. “You guys know how messy it was when we first met.” I sat down next to Olivia again. “My guard was up. Way up. Then I got to know him. It’s as if Adam has the password and my guard collapsed for him.”
“Oh honey.” My mom clutched her hands to her chest.
I covered my face with my hands. “We’ve kissed and admitted our feelings, but I’m still feeling completely freaked out.”
“Why the freak out?” Olivia asked, pulling my hands from my face.
A loud clap of thunder. The lights flickered. “It’s been forever since we let anyone else into,” I twirled my finger around the room, “this.”
Olivia nodded. “We’ve lost some key members before. It always hurts.”
“But we’re always okay,” Gracie said. “We pull each other back up.”
“It’s not even just the fear of losing him, which is very real because Adam doesn’t usually stick in one place very long with his job,” I said. “I don’t know what’s going on in his head. We got home after seeing Gracie and we went right back to work. We haven’t spoken much. It’s as if we had to hit pause right when everything was starting…”
“Luce, it’s just starting out,” Gracie said, completely invested in mine and Adam’s romance. “You’ve got time to figure out all the details. You’re still lighting the candle, no need to snuff out the flame while it’s still flickering to life.”
“I feel like I’m waiting for the other shoe to drop. The call to come. The thunder to crack.” I gestured toward the window. “It’s like I’ve got butterflies with razor blades for wings.”
“Hon, I don’t think there’s a shoe that’s going to drop this time,” Mom said softly.
“Adam is measured and thoughtful. He’s not the type to mess with it if he doesn’t see a future or have some plan in mind,” Olivia said with a reassuring pat to the couch we were sitting on.
“Until he’s packing up and moving to a new state,” I said sourly. “He was telling me how he moves around all the time for his job. He could even run off to Tokyo for work.”
“He’s here right now,” Mom said. “That’s all that matters.”
“Plus, he just got here!” Gracie shook her head at me like I was saying nonsense. “Does he actually jet around after a few months?”
“Sometimes,” I said, though I hadn’t exactly clarified that with him.
“Is it possible you’re just looking for a fight?” Mom asked, her words like cannon balls straight through the glass.
I tilted my head in question toward her.
“I know you’re always running around with your little shield and sword,” Mom said.
“And not only to defend yourself, but all of us,” Gracie added, gesturing to herself.
“Our own personal Rhodes Security Guard.” Olivia ruffled my hair. I grabbed her hands.
“You’re always trying to fight our battles. Protect Grandma’s legacy. Fix up my life—” Mom started.
“Fix my broken heart.” Olivia pulled her curved hands apart symbolizing a broken heart.
“Manage my schedule.” Gracie snickered.
“Our lives will have heartaches and broken bones. That’s impossible to avoid. Maybe a full life is worth a little heartbreak now and then. Maybe dancing is worth a few sprains,” Olivia said this to me, now in the present, but also to the little girl lying beside her under a princess comforter wishing she could’ve stopped their daddy from hurting her sisters, from hurting her mom, from hurting her little self. To the little girl vowing she wouldn’t ever let it happen again. “You can’t protect us, or yourself, from every hurt. And we wouldn’t want you to—some of it is needed, some of it is worth it.”
“It comes from a place of love,” I said, my voice small, fragile.
“Oh, sweetie, we know it’s from a place of love,” Mom said, her voice comforting and kind.
“But how about you spread some of that love to Adam? Take some of the hours from the Olivia shift and put them toward the new Adam shift,” Olivia cooed.
Gracie raised her hand. “You can take all that Google Calendar time used for me and sub in Adam’s calendar.”
“Hey, I like my little Lucy grocery delivery service and phone call check-ins.” Mom winked at me. “I’m keeping those.”
“I get it, guys, you want me to have the Adam distraction.” I shook my head.
“No, we just want you to have things in your life that are sweet for you. You deserve some attention like you give everyone else,” Olivia said. I thought of Adam’s brand of attention and it more than fit the bill.
“We’re also saying that you’re fired from the Rhodes Protection Agency,” Gracie joked. “Let Mom go off to the wilderness without stalking her digitally?—”
“Hey, I was right, wasn’t I? Mom hated it!” I defended myself.
“No, you thought Mom was going to come back with some crazy injury or get kidnapped.” Olivia rolled her eyes.
“Either way, I shouldn’t have gone.” Mom let out a breath. “But I did rest easy knowing if something happened, Lucy would be on it.”
“Mom appreciates me.” I waved my hand in the air triumphantly.
“All we’re saying, though,” Olivia said, bringing the conversation back to its original topic, “is that maybe, just maybe, this relationship isn’t another battle to fight, but a soft place for you to land.”
On July 3, we woke up to rainy skies and soggy ground. I could hear the coffee maker whirring through the thin cabin walls. I turned in the bed to find Olivia and Gracie squeezed next to me onto one twin bed. Olivia had said she was turning in last night, but Gracie and I had followed her into the room. We stayed up ‘til 2:00 a.m. talking about our favorite show that recently dropped on Netflix, what color of curtains Olivia wanted for her new bedroom, about Gracie’s revised plans for the fall, and how Olivia and Victor really were “just good friends.”
“Basically, best friends,” she whispered as she rolled the sheets between her fingers.
“Your super-hot best friend,” Gracie said, muffled by her pillow.
“Do not remind me how hot he is.” She pulled her sheet over her head.
“Oh, trust me, I understand trying to forget someone’s hotness. You know my weakness for a man in glasses. Adam is always wearing his, reading over paperwork with that adorable, concentrated face of his or giving me his little knowing looks.” I shivered. “I was trying to remember every single thing I didn’t like about him to counteract how much I liked his stupid face.”
“Stupid face you like to kiss,” Gracie snickered.
Now, I was tiptoeing out of the bedroom into the kitchen. Mom was pouring herself a mug of coffee. I ran over and wrapped her up in a hug.
“Want a cup?” she asked. The rich smell of coffee grounds enveloped me.
I reached around her for a mug. “I don’t just want a cup; I need a cup.”
“How late were you three up?” Mom asked. She’d sensibly gone to bed by Winston.
“Until two,” I yawned.
The rain started pouring noticeably harder. We peeked out the window. She narrowed her eyes, asking, “I wonder how things are back home?”
Adam and I exchanged good night texts last night, but I hadn’t asked him about the weather. I reached into the pocket of my robe and pulled out my phone and sent him a message.
Me
Hey, you. It’s storming pretty bad over here. How is it back home?
Mom took a sip of her coffee. “Weren’t you guys building a lot of things for the festival?”
“Yeah, but I think they can all withstand the rain. The crew will have to take a break from building until it lets up, but I don’t think it’s bad enough to be worried about damage.” I scrolled through some of the group threads with the other teams when Adam’s message popped up.
Adam
It’s bad over here, too.
Me
Is the festival set up ok?
Adam
so far – ok
I was snooping around the old notes up on the fridge and found Grandma’s famous pancake recipe hanging there under a bumble bee magnet. I touched it. Her handwriting was messy and loopy and the paper was slightly yellowing. She touched this, I thought, and it was as if, for a moment, the words imprinted against my heart.
“Let’s have Grandma’s pancakes,” I said to Mom. Gracie and Olivia were rubbing their eyes as they walked into the kitchen.
Gracie limped to a chair. “That is exactly what the doctor ordered.”
Olivia poured herself and Gracie coffee, while Mom and I pulled out the ingredients.
We ate the pancakes around the white, scratched up, round table in the kitchen on plates we’d used since I was a toddler. It got us remembering all our summers with Grandma here at the cabin.
“Do you remember the time we snuck in a last-minute trip before school started and she sent us off early to get ready and did all the cleanup for us?” Gracie asked. Cabin courtesy was cleaning up before you left—laundry, vacuuming, all of it.
“Oh, well, it was generous, yes. But she also had a man she was seeing here at the lake that summer. I’m pretty sure she was staying back a couple of extra weeks to see him without us in her hair,” Mom said, dragging her bite of pancake through a puddle of syrup.
“What?” Olivia’s eyes bugged out. Her fork stopped in the air, mid-bite. “A sneaky summer fling!”
“Did she have more game back then than I do now?” Gracie sighed.
“I remember how she was always sitting out on the porch every morning. Always awake before all of us,” I said, pulling my legs crisscross on the chair. “Grandma out by the lake with her coffee.”
“How early do you think she woke up?” Gracie pushed her empty plate away.
“I think it was around six, no matter if she was at home or on vacation. She liked to watch the sunrise, especially here at the lake,” Mom said.
I grinned. “Grandma always loved what she loved with all her heart—the festival, the lake?—”
“Us,” Olivia added softly.
Mom pushed a red curl behind my ear. “A trait she passed down to her granddaughters.”
“I think Mom should get on Love Local,” Gracie said, taking us by surprise.
“What?” I said, the confusion showing on my face.
Olivia tilted her head like she was mulling over the idea.
“Gracie, I don’t have the…” Mom started.
“The what?” Gracie asked. “If Grandma can have summer romances in her, what, seventies or eighties, you can set up a dating profile in your sixties.”
Mom opened her mouth to say something, but then closed it. She didn’t have any reasons or excuses not to, and I realized, I didn’t have any for her either.
“Maybe Gracie’s right,” I said, warming to the idea.
“Mom, you could use a little wining and dining!” Olivia said high and giggly.
Mom shook her head. “I haven’t dated since, well, how old are you, Liv? It’s been years earlier than that.”
“Last time I set up an account, Lucy got herself a bespectacled cutie who made me soup. Let’s see what happens when I set up an account for you.” Gracie tapped the table gamely.
Gracie and Olivia were playing chess. Mom was taking a shower. I felt antsy with an idea buzzing from my chest to my mind from our conversations about Grandma and her morning coffee. I went to the backroom where we stored tools and craft supplies and found some old art supplies I’d left here over the years. I carried some tubes of acrylic paints, brushes, and a blank canvas to the kitchen table with the view of the lake.
I painted the lake at sunrise with Grandma on her favorite wooden bench, her gray curls that were once strawberry blond, and her steaming mug of coffee which I knew would have two big spoonfuls of sugar. I painted her hands and could remember their texture as they tucked my curls behind my ear.
A few tears plopped onto the fresh paint and I left them.