4. Jensen
4
JENSEN
“Lennox?” I ask tentatively.
I have no idea what I’m even doing here. But I couldn’t get him out of my mind. Nick would fucking slaughter me if he knew where my thoughts have been for the last two days. Each time I’ve closed my eyes, Lennox has been front and center. Either sliding down the pole or grinding into the floor.
Coming to Peaches tonight was a mistake. I should have gone home, but I didn’t, and now I’m standing before him, tongue-tied. My stomach has been in knots since I first stepped into the club, but it doesn’t make any sense to me. I don’t know why I can’t get him out of my mind. The only thing I can think of is the fact that it’s Lennox and he shouldn’t be working at a place like this.
So, I’m just pulling a play from Nick’s playbook. I had to come and make sure that Lennox was okay. That’s all there is to it.
Lennox whips around, squealing before staring at me with wide eyes. “Jensen? What the fuck are you doing here?” His voice is shaky and I zero in on his hand, gripping the strap of his backpack tightly.
“I uh…” Rubbing the back of my neck, I shrug my shoulders. “I saw you here the other night. Wasn’t sure what to make of it, but I wanted to come and make sure you’re okay. Nick never said anything?—”
Lennox cuts me off, stepping closer to me. “Please tell me you didn’t say anything to Nick about me.”
“Of course not. That’s why I’m here. I didn’t want to stress him out, so I thought I would come check on you myself.” Which isn’t a lie, but it’s also not the full truth.
As I take him in, his shoulders visibly relax. His brown hair is longer than it usually is, and his arms seem bulkier. The couple of streetlights brightening up the parking lot dim his whiskey eyes. I quickly scan his clothes, seeing that he’s wearing red tight booty shorts and a black shirt.
He talks and my gaze snaps up. “You don’t need to check on me, Jensen. I’m not a baby, but I would appreciate it if you didn’t say anything to Nick.”
“Okay, okay, I won’t say anything. But why are you working here?” I ask, wanting to know why he’s here. Nick thinks he works at a coffee shop, and this is the complete opposite of that.
“Maybe the real question is, what are you doing here?” he snarks, placing his hand on his hip.
“I already told you; I came to check on you. I never saw you as the type of person who would work here.”
“What’s wrong with working here?” He crosses his arms over his chest, and I sigh.
“There’s nothing wrong with this job, Lennox. I saw you when I was here for a party, realized Nick didn’t know you worked here and just wanted to make sure you were okay.”
“Well, I’m okay.”
“Okay then.”
We stare at each other, neither one of us saying a word. I truly don’t know why I’m here. Yes, I wanted to check in on him, but why am I still here? And why am I noticing the small mole right above his lip?
“Well, if that’s all, I need to head home. I’m exhausted from work.” He steps back toward his car, and, for some unknown reason, I want to reach out and stop him.
“Sure,” I tell him instead, shaking my head.
I watch as he glances at me with his brow furrowed before getting into his car. The engine roars to life and Lennox gives me one final puzzled look before he drives off into the night.
Yeah, he’s not the only one who’s confused.
I walk into the office, taking a sip of my coffee. Probably my fifth coffee of the day. I don’t come in very often, but I’m required to show my face a few times a month. Luckily, working in IT allows me to be pretty flexible with where I have to work. I wave hi to the receptionist and continue striding down the hallway toward David’s office. I lift my hand up and knock once I reach the door.
“Come in,” he yells. I push my way inside, taking a seat on a couch in the corner. “Hey, Jensen what’s up?”
“Nothing, just dropping off my reports for this month. Figured I would show my face.”
“Ya know, letting people work from home sounded like a good idea at the time, but all I did was make myself lonely. Well, sometimes. Elliott still comes in daily and talks my ear off.”
Laughing, I nod my head, knowing exactly how Elliott can be. He’s definitely a Chatty Cathy, wanting to talk to everyone he comes in contact with. “Could be worse. You could still have Bobby coming in every day.”
David visibly shudders, closing his eyes. “Yeah, I’m thankful I don’t have to smell his feet anymore. But thanks for bringing your reports by. I’ll give them a once over before submitting them.”
“Sounds good, man. When are you leaving for your honeymoon?” I ask.
“Monday. Two weeks in paradise, man. I’ve never been to Hawaii. I can’t wait to lie out in the sun.”
“Well, you’ll have to tell me all about it when you get back. But I’ve got to head out. I’ll talk to you later?”
“Okay.”
As I leave work, submitting my monthly reports brings me a huge sigh of relief. They’re always such a tedious thing I have to do, so once they’re out of my hands I feel so much better. Gripping the handlebar, I swing my leg over my bike and sit on the seat. Scrubbing at my beard, I look around, debating what I should do now. I could head over to Nick’s place, but… my head swivels toward the sunset, and I smile, knowing exactly what I’m going to do.
I pop my helmet on, then push up my kickstand. My motorcycle roars to life and I speed away, weaving in and out of cars, heading down toward the coast. The beach at sunset is always one of my favorite things to witness. I could ride around for hours, watching the oranges and yellows of the sky transform into darkness. Once I’m out of the downtown traffic, I accelerate, letting my bike run free.
The wind blows into my face, and I smile, loving the vibrations from the machine. I make it to the highway sign letting me know I’m about to hit the Pacific Coast Highway. One day, I’ll ride from one end of the highway to the other, but until then, I typically ride around for thirty minutes to an hour before heading back down to home in San Diego.
The sun is setting, so I decide to veer off course and head down by the water. I’ve been coming out here since before I could drive. Back then, my parents would drop me off, or I would catch the bus and then take my skateboard down the hills. My skateboard eventually turned into my motorcycle, but my love of the beach never left me.
There’s something about the ocean that soothes me. The sounds of the crashing waves against the rocks and the smell of the sea air relax me when I breathe deeply. It’s the one place where I always feel myself. My friends know me as homebody Jensen, my coworkers only know brainiac IT tech Jensen. Sometimes I’m one or the other, even both. But there are instances where I wonder who else I am.
I park my bike against the metal railing and jump off, locking up my helmet. Turning left once I reach the sand; I use the walking trail down toward the shore. I find my favorite rock wall and hop up, taking a seat. Lifting my head, I stare out into the water, a sense of calmness instantly overcoming me. I take out my compact notepad, the one I use to make quick drawings. An hour passes by quickly, the sun setting and disappearing over the horizon. I look down at my drawing, a set of soft lips with a small mole right above the right side. Lennox. He’s plaguing every thought I have lately.
Jumping down off the wall, I lift my hands high above my head, stretching out. A gentle breeze hits my body, and I shiver. Deciding it’s time to return home, I hurry back to my bike before taking off and heading toward my house. I pull up beside my car, making a mental note that I need to take that baby out for a spin once in a while.
I unlock my door, kicking off my boots and tossing my wallet and keys on the entry table. My house isn’t big, but I bought it with my own money, and I’ve made it my sanctuary. I always assumed I would be married and have kids by thirty, following in my parents’ footsteps, but that hasn’t been the case.
Hell, I thought I was with the perfect woman, but it fizzled out years ago and I haven’t cared to start anything new with anyone. No one has captured my attention in so long. A pair of brown eyes and a small mole above a plump lip flash through my mind and I quickly shake my head, ridding those thoughts away.
With quick movements, I rush through getting ready for the night. I jump in and out of the shower, washing everything. Once I’m done, I brush through my beard and stand in front of the mirror, posing. Fuck. I need to get back to the gym. I flex my arms and sigh, deciding that no matter what, I’ll work out tomorrow. The tattoo on my forearm catches my attention and I figure it’s probably time to get a new one of those, too.
After pulling a pair of briefs up my legs, I grab my phone and slide into my bed. I doom scroll for a few minutes, following down a rabbit hole of cat memes. Lennox flashes in my mind again, and this time I’m curious. What has me feeling this way? Has me waking up hard and aching, constantly thinking of him? Fuck, is it just him, or maybe there’s something else I never realized?
Switching over to the browser on my phone, I pull up my favorite porn site. I scroll through numerous videos, but nothing’s really catching my eye. Fuck it, I tell myself, locating the gay side of the site. My eyes widen when I see how many there are to choose from. My finger scrolls from thumbnail to thumbnail until one finally catches my eye. And fine, maybe one of the men in the video looks a bit like Lennox, but that’s not the reason I chose it.
I press play, watching the video introduction. There are two men sitting on the couch playing a video game. Things get heated quickly and the next thing I know, the guy who looks like Lennox—short and lean with brunet hair—is on his knees. The other guy—muscular with a ton of tattoos—is holding his head steady as he face fucks him. He shows him no mercy and the man kneeling has a bright red face with tears spilling down his cheeks. My dick wants in on the action, so using one hand, I pull down my sweatpants, letting my shaft pop free. I stroke my cock while my eyes stay trained on the video. The two men have moved on from giving head and the one who was doing the face fucking is now eating out the other’s ass. It’s intoxicating to watch them go at it.
My hand picks up speed as I watch the guy completely devour the other. The tattooed guy can’t seem to get enough, diving in for more every time he takes a breath. The man in front of him is a sobbing mess and I don’t know which man to observe more closely. They quickly switch positions again, the muscular guy now fucking the other. My eyes trail back to the one that looks like Lennox, and I imagine he and I are in this situation. He’s bent over the couch and I’m ramming into him from behind. My hand is becoming a slippery mess, my precum leaking profusely. Oh fuck . I jerk myself faster, the two men on the screen turning into me and Lennox. I close my eyes, imagining him calling out my name as I pound into him. It doesn’t take long before a tingle races down my spine and my cock spurts cum all over my chest.
Oh, my god. Did I really just jerk off to thoughts of my best friend’s little brother? And why am I already thinking about when I can do it again?
I find myself pulling into the Peaches parking lot—again. For the past two nights, the only thing I could think about was Lennox on the stage. I tossed and turned, wondering what was going on in my head. So now it’s like I’m conducting a science experiment. Maybe if I see him again, it’ll rid my mind of him. The reason I’m thinking about him so much is that I’ve never seen him this way. I’m used to my best friend’s younger brother, who would always try to tag along with us and annoy us. It’s the first time I’ve seen this new guy who dances half naked on the stage. My curiosity is piqued. That’s all.
I pay the entrance fee to the bouncer, then proceed straight to the bar. The guy behind the counter drops a shot glass and I watch as it shatters on the floor, the tiny shards flying in every direction.
“Fuck, not again,” he mutters, hanging his head. He pulls his shoulder back, taking a deep breath before snatching the rag out of his pocket and using it to scoop up the pieces of glass. Once he tosses it into the trash, he washes his hands and makes his way over to me. “What can I get you?” he asks, an exasperated tilt to his voice.
“Uh—just water is fine.”
“Coming right up.”
He quickly drops off my water before disappearing farther down the bar, helping the next person. With the cold glass in my hands, I turn around, scanning the area as though I wasn’t just here. Nothing has changed; every chair and booth are in the same spot they were before. I try to find one in the back, but those are all taken. Swiveling my head left and right, I finally spot an available one, so I quickly stride that way, hoping I don’t run into Lennox. I want to see him, but there’s no way in hell I want him to see me.
The man who’s currently onstage finishes up his song and my jaw drops open when four pairs of cowboy boots stomp onto the stage after him. If I thought the sight of Lennox in a leather skirt was different, seeing him in a pair of daisy dukes with cowboy boots on was something completely new.
A flutter in my stomach appears, and I can’t help but stare. This is not at all the Lennox I know. The one I grew up with was a shy kid who liked to hide out in his room. This man onstage is the complete opposite of reserved. He has this bright gorgeous smile on his face, confidence oozing off every move he makes.
His hand reaches up to tip his cowboy hat, causing his arm muscles to flex. Damn, Lennox’s been working out too? My dick twitches in my pants and I look down in shock. So, apparently, last night wasn’t a fluke. I’m attracted to Lennox. I slouch down in my seat, wiggling around, but every motion is only making it worse. Holy shit, I can’t remember the last time I was this damn turned on.
A shadow appears over me, and I wince when I realize the song must have ended. Lennox is standing in front of me, his arms crossed over his chest.
“What are you doing here again, Jensen?” he asks, annoyed.
Well, fuck.