Chapter 19 Koda
NINETEEN
KODA
Dana pours me another whiskey. The amber liquid catches the light from her modern fireplace as she settles back into the armchair across from me.
Charlotte sleeps peacefully on the sectional beside us. Her breathing is deep and even, one hand curled protectively over her small baby bump.
The sight of her completely relaxed and trusting sends warmth flooding through my chest.
“She didn’t even make it through dessert.” Dana keeps her voice low, a small smile playing at the corners of her mouth. “Pregnancy exhaustion is no joke.”
I nod and take a sip of whiskey.
“She pushes herself too hard. Tries to pretend everything’s normal when her body’s literally creating another human being.”
“Sounds like someone else I know.” Dana raises an eyebrow pointedly. “The refusing-to-acknowledge-limitations thing must be strong in your relationship.”
I snort softly, careful not to disturb Charlotte.
“Thank you,” I say, meeting Dana’s gaze. “For tonight. For how you’ve been with her.”
Dana tilts her head.
“What were you expecting? That I’d be awful to the mother of my future niece?”
“No, but...” I pause, searching for the right words. “You could have judged. The age difference, the circumstances, the fact that she’s Jason’s daughter. But you didn’t.”
“Because none of that matters.” Dana’s voice is firm despite its softness. “What matters is that I haven’t seen you this happy in years. Maybe ever.”
The simple observation cuts straight through me.
Dana has always seen through my defenses, even when we were kids. While everyone else saw the tough exterior, she always recognized the vulnerability beneath.
“Speaking of happiness,” I venture, watching her face closely. “What about yours?”
Dana rolls her eyes, immediately on guard.
“I’m perfectly happy with my life.”
“Are you?” I press gently. “Because from where I’m sitting, you’ve got the career, the house, the money. But you come home to an empty bed every night.”
“Wow.” Dana takes a long sip of her whiskey. “Tell me how you really feel, brother.”
“I’m serious.” I lean forward, lowering my voice further as Charlotte shifts slightly in her sleep. “When’s the last time you went on a date that wasn’t a business dinner in disguise?”
Dana’s carefully constructed CEO facade cracks slightly.
“Dating at my age and position is complicated,” she finally admits, swirling the whiskey in her glass. “Most men in this town either want to use me for connections or run in the opposite direction the moment they realize I’m more successful than they are.”
I wait, sensing there’s more.
“Do you know what it’s like to watch a man’s face fall when I answer the ‘what do you do’ question?” Dana continues, her voice taking on a bitter edge. “To see that initial attraction turn to insecurity right before my eyes?”
“Their loss,” I offer, but she shakes her head.
“Most guys want someone they can take care of, not someone who runs a multi-million dollar business.” Her fingers trace the rim of her glass. “Someone soft and nurturing, not someone who makes tough decisions all day and fires people when necessary.”
The vulnerability in her admission surprises me. Dana rarely shows this side of herself, even to me.
“You haven’t found the right guy yet,” I say firmly. “Someone secure enough in himself to appreciate your strength instead of feeling threatened by it.”
Something flickers in Dana’s eyes.
“When did my big brother get so wise about relationships?”
“Probably around the time I knocked up my best friend’s daughter.”
I grin, and Dana laughs, the tension broken.
“Ugh, Jason is going to murder you.” She shakes her head, still smiling. “Have you thought about wearing body armor when you tell him?”
“I’m considering it.” I take another sip of whiskey, feeling the pleasant burn down my throat.
Dana refills her own glass then settles back into her chair, and we both watch Charlotte sleep for a moment. The peaceful quiet stretches between us, the kind that exists only between siblings who’ve weathered life’s storms together.
“She’s good for you,” Dana says finally, her voice softer now. “I can see it.”
I nod, not trusting myself to say more without revealing how much this means to me.
How much Charlotte and our future child mean to me.
My phone vibrates in my pocket, shattering the peaceful moment.
I pull it out, and Jason’s name and smiling face light up my screen.
“Speak of the devil,” I mutter, showing Dana the screen.
Her eyes widen.
“Weird timing. Are you going to answer it?”
“I should. Could be important.”
Dana glances at Charlotte, still sleeping soundly.
“Take it in the kitchen. I’ll stay with her.”
I move toward the kitchen, my chest tight with a mixture of guilt and anxiety. My best friend is calling me while his daughter sleeps in the next room, carrying my child. A reality he has no idea exists.
The weight of our deception suddenly feels heavier than ever as I swipe to answer the call.
“Hey, Jason. What’s up?”
“Koda, man, sorry to call so late.” His voice sounds tired, strained around the edges.
“Everything okay?”
“Not really.” Jason sighs heavily. “Just got an email about a board meeting that got moved up. It’s for that big construction contract I’ve been chasing for months. They want to meet next week, right when Charlotte’s showcase is happening.”
“Sounds important,” I offer, uncertain where this is going.
“Yeah, but that’s not the issue.” A pause, then, “The meeting’s mandatory for all the contractors they’re considering. If I miss it, I’m out of the running completely. Which means I won’t be there for Charlotte’s showcase at the beauty school.”
My body tenses at the mention of the showcase.
Charlotte has been practicing for weeks, stressing over every detail. The thought of her father missing it makes something protective flare in my chest, even as I recognize the irony of my reaction.
“She’s been talking about it for weeks,” Jason continues, his voice thick with regret. “Look, I know it’s a lot to ask, but would you mind going in my place? Just so she has someone there supporting her?”
The request slams into me with unexpected force.
My best friend is asking me to stand in for him, trusting me to be there for his daughter, completely unaware that I’m already sharing her bed, her life, her future.
“Of course I’ll go.” My voice sounds strangely normal despite the storm of emotions churning inside me. “You don’t even need to ask.”
“I know you’re busy with the gym and everything.” Relief colors Jason’s tone. “But this means a lot. She respects you, you know? I’d feel better knowing she’s got family there cheering her on.”
Family.
The word settles in my chest, heavy with meaning Jason doesn’t intend. If he only knew that the family connection would soon be much more direct than he imagines.
“Happy to do it.” I stare at my distorted reflection in the refrigerator door, barely recognizing myself. How have we let this deception go on so long? “What time is it again?”
“It’s in two weeks. Saturday at 2. It’s at the main auditorium at the beauty school.” Jason pauses. “I feel like such a shitty dad, missing this.”
“You’re not a shitty dad,” I tell him. “Charlotte knows how hard you work for her. One missed event doesn’t change that.”
“Yeah, maybe.” He doesn’t sound convinced. “Still, can you make sure to take some pictures? Maybe a video of her part? I want to see how she does.”
“I’ll record the whole thing.”
Another promise that’s easy to keep. I’d already planned to document every second of Charlotte’s performance, wanting to capture her milestone for our child to see someday.
“Thanks, brother.” The relief in Jason’s voice is palpable. “Don’t know what I’d do without you sometimes. Charlotte’s lucky to have you looking out for her.”
Each word of gratitude feels like a knife between my ribs.
The trust in his voice makes me want to confess everything right then. To tell him that yes, I am looking out for Charlotte, but in a way he never intended or would approve of. That I love his daughter. That she’s carrying my child.
Instead, I swallow hard.
“That’s what friends are for.”
“Exactly.” Jason sounds more cheerful now. “Hey, how about we grab beers when this contract business settles down? Been too long since we’ve caught up.”
“Sounds good.” The words taste like ash in my mouth.
After we hang up, I stand motionless in Dana’s pristine kitchen, the phone heavy in my hand.
The irony of the situation isn’t lost on me. Jason trusts me completely with his most precious person, not knowing I’ve already betrayed that trust in the most fundamental way possible.
Yet beneath the guilt, there’s something else.
A fierce determination to be worthy of both Charlotte and Jason’s trust, even if in different ways than Jason imagines. To be the man Charlotte needs me to be, the father our daughter deserves, and eventually, hopefully, the friend Jason can forgive.
I pocket my phone and return to the living room, where the two women who matter most to me wait.
I gently shake Charlotte’s shoulder, pulling her from the deep sleep she’s fallen into on Dana’s couch. Her eyelashes flutter against her cheeks before she opens her eyes.
“Time to go home, baby.”
Charlotte blinks up at me, recognition dawning slowly.
“I fell asleep.”
“You needed it.” I help her sit up as Dana appears with Charlotte’s jacket.
Charlotte accepts the jacket with a sheepish smile. “Sorry that I was such terrible company.”
Dana waves away the apology.
“No apologies necessary. Growing a human is exhausting. I’m just glad you were comfortable enough to crash on my couch.”
We say our goodbyes with promises of doing this again soon. Dana hugs Charlotte longer than necessary, whispering something in her ear that makes Charlotte’s eyes brighten with tears before she nods firmly.
The sight of my sister and the mother of my child embracing fills me with a contentment I never expected to feel.