45. I’ve Found – Dakota
45
I’VE FOUND
DAKOTA
W hen I rouse from sleep, for a moment, I'm disoriented, but then I feel Lauren's warm body pressed against mine, and everything clicks into place. I'm home.
I glance at the clock on the nightstand - 6:15 AM. We need to get up before Roman wakes and realizes I spent the night. As much as I want to stay in this moment forever, I know we need to be careful for Roman's sake.
"Lauren," I whisper, gently stroking her arm. "We should get up."
She stirs, her eyes fluttering open. A slow smile spreads across her face as she sees me, and my heart swells.
"Good morning," she murmurs, leaning in for a soft kiss.
We dress quickly and quietly, stealing glances and shy smiles. It feels like we're teenagers again, sneaking around. But there's an undercurrent of seriousness, too - we both know we need to handle this situation delicately for Roman's sake.
I'm in the kitchen, starting the coffee maker, when I hear the patter of small feet.
"Dakota!" Roman's excited voice rings out. Before I know it, he's launched himself at me, and I scoop him up in a big hug.
"Hey, buddy!" I say, my heart full. "I missed you!"
Lauren appears in the doorway, her eyes soft as she watches us. "Look who came over early to help with breakfast," she says to Roman, smoothly covering for my presence.
Roman's face lights up. "Can we have pancakes? Please?"
I look at Lauren, who nods with a smile. "Pancakes it is," I declare.
The morning unfolds in a whirl of flour, giggles, and sticky syrup. As I flip pancakes and listen to Roman chatter about his daycare adventures, I'm struck by how right this feels. This is what I've been missing, what I've been working so hard for.
After breakfast, we decide to spend the day at the park. Roman runs ahead, his energy seemingly boundless, while Lauren and I walk hand in hand behind him.
"Is this okay?" I ask softly, squeezing her hand. "Me being here, spending the day with you both?"
Lauren looks up at me, her eyes clear and sure. "It's more than okay, Dakota. It's perfect."
We spend hours at the park, pushing Roman on the swings, helping him across the monkey bars, and having a picnic lunch on a sunny patch of grass. As the afternoon wears on, Roman's energy finally starts to flag.
"I think it's time to head home," Lauren says, noticing Roman's yawns.
On the walk back, Roman insists on riding on my shoulders. His small hands rest on my head, and I hold onto his legs, ensuring he's secure. Lauren walks beside us, her hand occasionally brushing against mine.
Back at the house, Roman is barely awake. "Can Dakota tuck me in?" he asks sleepily.
Lauren and I exchange a glance. "Of course, buddy," I say, my throat tight with emotion.
As I tuck Roman into bed, he looks up at me with heavy-lidded eyes. "I'm glad you're back, Dakota," he mumbles.
"Me too, buddy," I whisper, smoothing his hair. "Me too."
When I return to the living room, Lauren is waiting for me on the couch. I sit next to her, and she immediately curls into my side.
"Thank you for today," she says softly.
I press a kiss to the top of her head. "No, thank you. For giving me another chance. For letting me be a part of your lives again."
Lauren looks up at me, her eyes shining. "Our lives, Dakota. You're a part of our lives."
As we sit there, the evening light fades around us, and I feel a sense of peace I haven't known in months. There's still a lot to figure out, I know. But right here, right now, with Lauren in my arms and Roman sleeping peacefully down the hall, I know I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be.