CHAPTER TWENTY
HAZEL
TODAY IS THE day I get to call my parents. You’d think that would be a relief, something to look forward to. But instead, I feel like I’m about to fall off a cliff with no one to catch me. My mind races, spiraling through all the possibilities.
What if they didn’t even know I was missing? What if this phone call is what sends them over the edge? My parents are strong, but I know how fragile they can be when it comes to me. This call will destroy them.
And it’s not like I can even tell them the truth.
Kieran stands in front of me, holding out a phone that isn’t mine. His gaze is steady, like always—cold, calculated, and unreadable. He doesn’t need to say much to make me feel like I’m trapped in a corner with nowhere to run.
"Just say exactly what I told you." His voice is calm but sharp, like a knife’s edge.
I nod, even though my throat feels like it’s closing. My heart hammers in my chest as he finally hands me the phone. I want to ask how he got my mother’s number, but the answer is obvious. He must’ve gone through my phone.
Dread curls in my stomach as I stare at the phone. My fingers tremble as I dial, each ring making my breath shallower, my head dizzy. The pacing starts before I even realize it—I circle the small room like a trapped animal, every step amplifying the fear in my gut. Charlie lies by the fire but his brown eyes follow me back and forth.
Do I stick to Kieran’s script, or do I scream for help?
Would he kill me if I did?
I steal a glance at him. He leans casually against the wall, arms crossed, as if this is just another day for him. Like he doesn’t have a care in the world—or like he’s so confident in his control over me that he doesn’t need to worry.
The phone clicks.
"Hello?"
I stop pacing. My mother’s voice. Warm, soft, familiar. I almost collapse on the spot. It’s been days—maybe weeks—since I’ve heard her. It’s like breathing fresh air after suffocating. My lips tremble as I try to keep my emotions locked down.
"Mam, it’s me," I say, my voice cracking. I know she won’t recognize the number, but I pray she recognizes me.
"Jack, it’s Hazel!" she shouts, and just like that, the floodgates open.
"Sweetheart, where are you? We’ve been sick with worry."
God, this is harder than I thought it would be. My vision blurs with tears, and I bite down hard on my lip to stop the sob that’s threatening to break free. I glance at Kieran again, silently begging him to let me tell them the truth. His expression doesn’t change. He just unfolds his arms and takes one slow, steady step toward me.
A warning.
"I’m okay," I lie. "I’m safe." Another lie, but it’s only half of one.
"But… something did happen."
I’m shaking so badly I can barely keep the phone to my ear.
"What happened? Where are you?" My mother’s voice is frantic now.
I can’t do this.
I glance at Kieran again, pleading with my eyes. Please, don’t make me do this to them. Please.
But he doesn’t waver.
"I’ve been kidnapped," I say, my voice barely above a whisper. It’s the truth, but it’s not the whole truth. Not the part they need to hear.
"What?" My mother’s cry slices through me. I hear rustling on the other end, followed by my father’s firm, steady voice.
"Is she on the phone?"
I squeeze my eyes shut, tears slipping past my lashes.
"I don’t have much time, Mam," I rush out. "But Sean is the man who kidnapped me. I’m being kept in the Wicklow Mountains."
I hate myself for saying it. I hate how her sobs crack through the phone and how my father’s steady strength falters for just a second. “Is she okay?”
"Oh, my baby," my mother cries. "What does he want?"
The pain in her voice is unbearable. I feel like I’m dying from the inside out, slowly, with every breath. My father’s voice returns, strong but thick with emotion.
"Hazel."
"Daddy," I sob, unable to hold it back any longer.
The phone is ripped from my hands. I blink, disoriented, and stare at Kieran in horror as he ends the call without hesitation.
"You did good," he says, like I’ve just passed some twisted test.
I want to scream. I want to punch him, claw at him, anything to make him understand what he just put me through. But instead, I swallow the rage and pain, forcing them down into the hollow part of me that’s growing bigger every day.
"I get to live now?" I ask, my voice flat.
He doesn’t answer right away. Instead, he slips the phone into his pocket and studies me like I’m some puzzle he’s trying to solve.
"That’s the first step in my plan," he says finally.
I take a step toward him. "What’s the second?"
His gaze darkens slightly, and he exhales like I’m exhausting him just by existing. "I need to leave evidence that Sean was the one who took you. I have a burner phone, and I’m setting up all the messages to point directly to him. When the time is right, we’ll hand them over as proof."
I nod along, pretending I understand. Pretending I’m okay with it.
"When will the time be right?"
He doesn’t answer.
"Kieran," I press, my voice rising. "I just lied to my parents."
"No, Hazel," he says, his tone firm, almost condescending. "You just saved your own life."
I stare at him, the weight of his words pressing down on me like a heavy blanket. I saved my life. But at what cost? I’ve broken my parents. I’ve handed them pain and fear on a silver platter.
And Kieran doesn’t care.
Because to him, this isn’t about my life. It’s about his plan.
I nod again numbly and turn away from him. My legs feel weak as I sink onto the armchair, my head buried in my hands. The warmth of my mother’s voice still lingers, but it doesn’t feel like home anymore. It feels like a reminder of everything I’ve lost.
The lie saved my life today.
But what’s left of me tomorrow?
“This will kill them,” I say out loud, angry and frustrated, the words slipping free before I can stop them. I thought Kieran had left me alone to wallow in my misery. But his voice cuts through the air like a whip, startling me.
“They’ll worry, yes. But in the end, they’ll survive—just like you.”
I whirl around and glare at him. His presence is close, too close, suffocating. “You say shit like that just to make me compliant,” I snap, rising from the chair, fists clenching at my sides. “You don’t care who you break, do you?”
He laughs. Not the mocking chuckle I’ve heard before, but something new. It’s darker, rougher, and it stops me cold.
“I’ve worked for the Walsh family since I was that high.” He holds his hand to his waist, like he’s remembering the exact moment his life was set in stone.
A kid. My stomach twists. From the height he’s showing, he couldn’t have been older than thirteen—maybe younger.
“I was just a boy when I had to kill for the first time,” he says, and there’s no regret in his voice. No remorse. Just cold, brutal honesty.
The room feels smaller, as if the walls are closing in. He’s talking about killing someone like it’s nothing. Like it’s normal.
“I’ve obeyed every kill order they’ve given me,” he continues, stepping closer, slow and deliberate. “Never hesitated. Not once.”
I want to ask him who he killed. How it felt. If it haunts him or if it fuels him. But I can’t find the words. Maybe I don’t want to know the answers.
He studies me for a moment before tilting his head slightly, his eyes narrowing. “Do you wonder why I do it?” His voice is softer now but no less dangerous.
I can’t answer him. My mouth feels dry like I’ve swallowed sand.
“To keep my sister alive,” he says, his gaze steady and unflinching. “To put food in her mouth.”
The anger inside me ignites like gasoline thrown on a fire. My lip curls in disgust, and before I can stop myself, the words are out. “That’s bullshit.”
Kieran freezes, his eyes widening for a split second before they darken, stormy and dangerous.
“Excuse me?”
I don’t back down. I take a step toward him, my pulse racing. “Your sister isn’t with you now, is she? She doesn’t need food in her mouth. She’s in college.” My voice is venomous. “What would she think if she knew that blood got her there? That her brother—”
“Be very careful, Hazel,” he warns, his voice a low growl.
But I’m past careful. I just tore my parents apart for him, and the dam inside me has finally burst.
“What would your sister think,” I press on, “if she knew you kidnapped an innocent girl?” I stab my finger into my chest, my voice rising. “I’ve done nothing wrong. Yet you took me. To kill me.”
The weight of my own words hits me harder than I expected. My throat tightens, and I blink back tears. I don’t know why it hurts more now—maybe because I feel something for him. Something twisted and wrong.
He stares at me for a moment, his expression unreadable. Then, his lips curl into a bitter smile. “I don’t think you’re as innocent as you pretend to be.”
A laugh escapes me, sharp and humorless. “Please. Tell me all the people I’ve killed and terrorized.” I cross my arms over my chest, daring him to continue.
He pauses, and for a moment, I think I’ve won. I think I’ve backed him into a corner. But then his eyes light up with something dangerous.
“You were willing to leave Charlie behind to save your own skin.”
The words hit me like a punch to the gut. My arms drop to my sides as the guilt floods in.
“I bet you got him as a pup,” Kieran adds, stepping closer.
I did. I can still remember the day I brought Charlie home, his tiny paws stumbling across the floor as he followed me everywhere. He trusted me. Loved me. And when it came down to it, I was ready to leave him behind.
Kieran sees the guilt on my face and presses harder. “He’s lived with you his entire life. Trusts you. You’re the hand that feeds him, the hand that shows him affection. And yet you were ready to abandon him to save yourself.”
I shouldn’t feel like a monster. I shouldn’t . But I do.
“What about your brother?”
I snap, taking a step toward him, my voice shaking with emotion. “Don’t you dare—”
He shakes his head, cutting me off. “No, Hazel. Since you want to get personal, let’s get personal.” His voice rises slightly, and my heart stutters.
He’s angry.
But it’s not just the anger that terrifies me. It’s the way he’s closing the distance between us, step by step, his body language charged with something I can’t fully understand.
I take a step back, but it’s useless. He’s faster, stronger, and he’s closing in.
“You want to judge me for what I’ve done?” His voice is lower now, but the intensity burns hotter. “Fine. But don’t pretend you’re spotless, Hazel. You were willing to sacrifice the things you love to save yourself.”
Tears blur my vision, and my chest heaves as I try to steady my breathing. “I was scared,” I whisper, hating how weak my voice sounds.
“And you think I wasn’t?” His voice cracks, just for a moment, and it hits me harder than anything else he’s said.
He’s standing so close now, I can feel the heat of his body, smell the faint scent of his cologne mixed with something darker.
“I killed to survive,” he says softly, leaning down so his face is level with mine. “You left Charlie behind to survive. We’re not as different as you think.”
I can’t look at him. I can’t breathe. My hands tremble at my sides, but I refuse to let him see me fall apart.
I shake my head, more to convince myself than to argue with him. “I’m not like you.”
He smirks, his gaze locking onto mine like he’s peeling back every layer of me. “Not yet.”
His words chill me to the bone. Because part of me knows he’s right.
He takes a step back, and I can finally breathe again. But I know this conversation isn’t over.
Kieran doesn’t say anything else. He just turns and leaves, the sound of his footsteps fading into the distance.
I sink to the floor, burying my face in my hands as the weight of everything crashes down on me.
He’s breaking me—piece by piece. And the worst part is, I don’t know how to stop him.