Chapter 11 Kit
I was on cloud nine when I woke up. Everything that happened last night was unexpected, but it was something I’d been dreaming about since Christmas Eve.
That first kiss with William was absolutely amazing.
I had never felt that much heat from a kiss.
Even though we got interrupted and things couldn’t go much further than kissing, I felt a warm sensation every time I thought about it.
I could still feel where his hands had been around my waist and on my thighs.
I wondered what would have happened if we hadn't been interrupted.
I immediately reached for my phone and texted Veronica. “Made out with William.”
I didn’t wait for Veronica’s reply. I knew I really needed to get up and get dressed. I had promised Aunt Rita I would make a ham, black eyed peas, greens, and cornbread. It had been our New Year’s Day meal every year since I could remember.
I stood up and walked to the window. I looked down at the street and my heart skipped a little when I saw William walking down the front steps, but then I noticed that William was walking down the front path to meet a woman.
I blinked. Was I seeing this correctly? Was William talking to a beautiful, supermodel-tall woman?
Before I could fully process what I was seeing, the woman threw her arms around William.
They hugged, he got in the car, and they drove off.
I turned around. My face felt hot. I felt dizzy.
Was I really so off about what had happened with William last night?
I thought it was something special, but clearly, I had misread everything.
Not just last night, but all the time we had spent together over the last week.
I had been vulnerable with William. I had opened up about my mom and my past relationship with Matt.
And to be fair, William had been open and honest with me when he told me that he doesn’t get attached. I just didn’t listen.
I covered my face with my hands and collapsed back onto my bed. As if I had sent a best friend bat signal into the air, my phone rang. It was Veronica.
“Sorry it took me a minute to call you. I had to put Preston in his playpen. Tell me everything!” Veronica said excitedly. I sighed.
“Well, it was pretty hot. We danced all night, and then we kissed when the ball dropped at midnight. It was completely electric, so we left together and made out as we walked home. It was so hot, and we came home fully intending to take it further, but then Aunt Rita was here from her trip and in the kitchen with her travel boyfriend. So I just called it a night and went to sleep. Probably for the best.”
“Aunt Rita totally cock-blocked you by accident!” Veronica cried. “Do you think you’ll hook up next time?”
“I don’t know.” I hesitated. Maybe she had a point. I told Veronica about how I had just seen William drive off with a supermodel in a Mercedes.
“Oh, well, fuck him.” Veronica declared.
Buoyed by Veronica’s support, I let a puff of air pass through my nostrils and said, “It’s no big deal. It’s been fun hanging out with William, but time to get back to the real world.”
“This isn’t about William. This is about you. Plenty of fish in the sea! New year, new Kit. Time to make a new year’s resolution to embrace fun and spontaneity and to get laid.”
“Was your advice always this full of cliches?” I asked.
“Yes, absolutely. And sometimes it even rhymes if I’ve had some drinks.” Veronica bragged.
“I don’t know…” My voice trailed off. I heard Preston cry in the background of the call.
“Girl, I have to go, but I want some updates about how you’ve reactivated that dating account and you are getting out there! Send me screenshots. I need proof you’re not going to hide in your protective shell!”
I fell backwards onto the bed. I blew air between my lips. I knew that I had glossed over my disappointment about seeing William with another woman this morning. I wasn’t ready to be honest with myself about how I was feeling, so explaining it to Veronica would have been impossible.
Veronica was right. New year, new Kit. I picked up my phone and clicked on the SinglesMingle app. I navigated to the profile settings and tapped to toggle the button next to Casual Encounters from off to on. I threw my phone on the bed and got up to take a shower.
By the time I came back from my shower, I had half a dozen messages from people in a sixty-mile radius. Well, at least I have this going for me, I thought as I scrolled through the messages.
I heard Aunt Rita stirring in the next room, and I joined her.
We went downstairs to the kitchen and spent the day together.
While I made lunch, she started another batch of cookies.
It was a nice distraction to be with Aunt Rita.
She always knew how to make me feel good.
I was careful not to bring up William, but eventually Aunt Rita asked, “So, you and William?”
“Just friends,” I said without looking up from the pan I was pouring the cornbread mixture into.
“Oh, okay,” Aunt Rita said with a smile. I shot her a look.
“No really,” I insisted. “We’re just friends. Last night, we just got caught up in the New Year’s Eve drinks.”
Aunt Rita put her hands up. “Sure, I mean, far be it from me to poo-poo anyone’s fun. I’m happy for you, Kit.” I didn’t respond, and I think she knew to drop it.
Aunt Rita and I leaned against the island as we waited for the food to finish cooking. She was showing me photos from their vacation when William came into the kitchen.
“Hey, William. Happy New Year!” Aunt Rita said. She gave him a hug. I didn’t turn around. I felt my whole body get tense, and I tried not to let it show. William opened the fridge and got out a soda.
“Hey, Kit. Happy New Year,” he said. He had come around to the other side of the island, so we were facing each other.
“Yeah, Happy New Year,” I said, smiling. “We’re making some food. There’s so much. You should have some.”
“Thanks,” William said. He was searching my face. I could tell he wanted to talk to me. Aunt Rita must have sensed it too because she excused herself and went into the front office.
I decided to rip the Band-Aid off. “I know I mentioned I was going to go for a night run tonight, but I actually have a date, so I’m going to be out tonight.”
“Oh,” William’s face fell and I could see him swallow hard. “Cool.”
“Yeah, I guess I should thank you,” I said a little coldly. “Everyone, including you, just kept encouraging me to relax, have fun, be more casual, and I realized this was probably what I was missing out on. It’s my new year’s resolution.”
“Your resolution?” he asked.
“Yeah, my resolution is to just relax and have more fun. Not to take myself or anyone else too seriously.” I shrugged one shoulder playfully and said, “The cornbread has about five more minutes, but the black-eyed peas probably need more time.”
William stared at me blankly.
I tried not to read anything into his expression and silence. “I figured you’d be fine with just having fun, since you said you only want casual flings anyways. We’re cool, Mr. Right Now?”
William nodded. “We’re totally cool.” He shoved his hand in his pocket and let a slow breath out. “I’m going up to my room. I’m wiped.”
I smiled as I watched him walk out of the room. As soon as he was gone, I slumped over and laid my forehead on the counter. “This is going to be harder than I thought,” I whispered to myself, but I was determined.
I did go out on a date that night with a nice enough guy from the next town over, but it didn’t go anywhere.
In fact, I went on several dates over the next few weeks.
Every time it was the same thing. Some flirty texting back and forth to set up the date, a pleasant first date, and sometimes even a second date, but then the inevitable first kiss.
These kisses enlightened me to a few things.
First, I was actually attractive enough that multiple people were willing to kiss me.
Second, it was possible to have a nice time and no potential, and that was okay.
And lastly, a pleasant kiss is nice but not comparable to a kiss that sets you on fire because the chemistry is so explosive.
I tried to force myself to go on at least one date per week.
This is probably what I should have been looking forward to, but instead, I found myself anticipating Tuesday and Thursday evenings when I closed at the library.
William would be there until close tutoring high school and college students.
At first, I thought it might be weird, but we fell back into a friendly rhythm.
I found myself making excuses not to make dates on Tuesdays and Thursdays, and I always offered to close.
I had started walking to work on those days, so I would have an excuse to walk home with William.
Sometimes we would go to The Pub and play pool after work.
On cold days, we’d hurry home. If there was a fire in the front room, we’d hang out in there together. If not, we’d go into the kitchen to make a cup of tea. William would tell me stories about work, growing up with a spunky Filipina immigrant mom, and all the best places he’d ever traveled to.
I would tell him stories about quirky library patrons, and the funny stuff people used as bookmarks that we found when we reshelved the books.
And because I wanted to convince us both that we were just friends, sometimes I would even share weird first date stories.
William had convinced me that I needed to watch Game of Thrones.
He was absolutely stunned that I had never seen it.
We started watching it on Tuesday evenings, but I insisted we watch holiday movies and shows on Thursdays.
I told him he was woefully behind on decades of Christmas movies and he really needed to try and get caught up before next Christmas.
To my surprise, he agreed. I made a long “to watch” list that we started working through.
Sitting on the sofa with William, laughing, and playfully arguing, was the best part of my day. The worst part was when one of us finally threw in the towel and said that we had to go to bed.
I was putting on a good front with Veronica.
I was giving her a steady enough stream of first date stories that she wouldn’t launch into the whole “New year, new Kit speech,” and I made sure not to mention how much time I was spending with William.
I wasn’t admitting to myself, let alone anyone else, how my feelings for William were growing instead of dissipating.
Dating other people was just highlighting how much I enjoyed William compared to other people.
My mind regularly drifted to that night William and I kissed. At first, I tried to push the memory from my mind, but eventually, I decided it was harmless to fantasize about him.
I reminded myself that if something were to happen again, a kiss or maybe even more, that William probably would just be having fun. But maybe I could be okay with that?
By February, William had started a weekly lunch meeting with Creekstone’s fledgling Chamber of Commerce.
He invited me to join them, saying that it’s nice to have city employees join the conversation.
I went to the first few meetings. Nick always opened the meetings, but William led the networking activities before the lunch, and he introduced the speakers that presented during the plated lunch.
I liked seeing the work side of William.
He was charming and charismatic, but he never corrected or overtalked people.
He always had control of the room. Seeing William’s composure and professionalism was such a stark contrast to the memory of New Year’s Eve.
Part of me liked knowing there was a part of William that could be passionate and heated.
Part of me liked remembering the way he couldn’t keep his hands off me that night.
I knew there was much more to William. I wondered if he still felt that for me.
At the end of each meeting, William gave an update on the town’s redevelopment project.
When William brought in some large renderings of the potential development and displayed them on easels, we could see the whole vision for a new Creekstone.
At the conclusion of each meeting, I would hear business owners and community members comment on how excited they were about the redevelopment effort and how, for the first time in a long time, they felt hope.
Ms. Patty and Ms. Pearl both commented that they loved the vision.
At the end of February, William brought in a speaker to talk about small business support.
It was the woman I’d seen with him on New Year’s Day, Meredith.
She was as smart as she was beautiful, and I felt an inexplicable jealousy.
For the last two months, I’d been going on dates and sometimes even telling William about them, and he had carried on as if we were just the greatest friend.
And William brought Meredith to one chamber lunch to talk about resources for businesses, and I felt so jealous I could barely make it through lunch. I bolted as soon as it was over.
The next day William ignored any ice daggers I threw his way and continued on, just as a good friend would.
He waited for me after closing at the library.
Then he walked home with me, even though I was almost silent.
When we got home, he followed me into the kitchen.
William busied himself with making me a cup of tea.
We sat in silence until the kettle whistled.
Then as William poured the water over the tea bag, I blurted out, “Have you slept with Meredith?”
“Excuse me?” William coughed, nearly spilling hot water everywhere.
“Meredith. The two of you have worked together and seem so familiar with each other. I wondered if there was more going on.” I looked down at my tea, acting as if watching it steep needed my full attention.
William pressed his lips together to prevent a smile and put the kettle down. “I have slept with Meredith. A very long time ago. In college. And we realized we weren’t suited for each other and became friends.”
I sniffed. “Oh, that’s a shame. She’s beautiful.”
William’s lips parted and his head tilted like he wanted to say more, but he stopped himself.
“Let’s go watch the next movie on our Christmas list,” I said leaving the kitchen.
I heard William’s feet padding behind mine, and we settled onto the sofa.
We watched the movie The Holiday. William acted totally normal.
He seemed unphased by the cold shoulder I had been giving him for two days.
He seemed committed to waiting it out until things normalized, and I loathed and adored this about him.