43. Tanner
Chapter Forty-Three
Tanner
Drawing the line
“Laney, what are you doing here?” I leaned back against my truck, keys still in my hand.
“You’re home,” she said, her voice too bright. “I’m just happy to see you.”
My jaw tightened. I had texted Ava earlier. No reply, which was not like her. Now, this.
“I don’t want to repeat myself, Laney. I wish you the best, but I already told you there’s no chance for us.”
“Breaking up with you was a mistake,” she insisted, clasping her hands in front of her chest. “I understand that now.”
“I don’t think it was a mistake,” I said flatly. “And I really have to go.”
She reached for my hand, and I yanked it away. “Seriously, Laney. Please stop.”
“Tanner, please…”
“I’m not having this conversation over and over. I’m sorry things in Seattle aren’t working out the way you thought they would. Maybe it’s harder than you expected. That doesn’t mean we rewind.”
“I don’t think it’s going to work out with you and Ava,” she blurted out as I began to turn away.
My head snapped back. “You don’t even know Ava.”
“I met her.”
“My relationship with Ava has nothing to do with you. I would be saying all of this even if Ava didn’t exist.”
“Are you serious about her?” she pressed.
“That is none of your fucking business.” Something in my tone must have finally landed, because she flinched. I exhaled sharply. “Take care of yourself. Please don’t text me. Please don’t call me. For fuck’s sake, we are not having this conversation again.”
She blinked rapidly, and I felt a little bad, but I didn’t know how to get her to back off without being this direct.
“Okay,” she whispered.
“We’ve been over for years.”
She still didn’t step back, so I opened my truck door. “Tanner.” I glanced up at the sound of Tori’s voice.
Laney turned. Tori strode over, not even pretending to be casual. “Come on, Laney. Leave Tanner alone.”
“This isn’t your business,” Laney snapped.
“It is when you won’t listen to him,” Tori shot back. “Drop it.”
Laney’s gaze flicked toward Tori, calculating. Finally, she stepped back. I climbed into my truck and pulled the door shut, mouthing, “Thank you,” toward Tori.
As I drove away, frustration churned in my chest. I still hadn’t heard back from Ava. That gnawed at me more than Laney ever could. Abruptly, I wondered just what Laney twisted when she talked to Ava. I shook that worry away because there wasn’t a damn thing I could do for the moment.
By the time I got home, my mood had gone from irritated to simmering. I barely had time to drop my bag before my mom showed up. “Sophie isn’t returning my calls,” she announced.
I studied her for a beat. “Is that a surprise?”
“Yes,” she insisted. “I know she has feelings about your father, but she’s never stopped talking to me before.”
I leaned against the kitchen counter, crossing my arms. “Mom. We all have feelings about Dad.” She twisted her hands together. “Sophie’s not going to stop talking to you forever, but she’s processing her way.”
“I don’t understand why she won’t just talk to me.”
“Because you didn’t protect us,” I snapped.
The words came out sharper than I intended.
Once they were out, there was no taking them back.
“I know you were Dad’s victim too. But we were kids.
” She blinked rapidly. I took a slow breath, willing myself to remain calm.
“He hurt all of us. Now that he’s gone, can we at least acknowledge that instead of pretending it didn’t happen? ”
“Tanner,” she whispered, pain vibrating in her voice.
“All Sophie wants,” I continued, “is for you to acknowledge that what we went through was real, that we weren’t crazy for being scared.”
My mom covered her mouth with her hand, but a shaky sob escaped. I waited while she took a few deep breaths. When she opened them, the pain flickering in her gaze twisted my heart. “I’m so sorry, Tanner. I know he hurt us all. I guess I just wanted to move on. She won’t even talk to me.”
“Then leave her a message,” I said, keeping my tone level. “Tell her you’re ready to talk, really talk.”
Clearing her throat, she nodded. I watched her, feeling the old ache in my chest, a complicated knot of anger and love. My father was gone, but the wreckage he’d left in his wake was still very much here. Somewhere in the middle of all of that, I was still waiting for Ava to text me back.
I scrubbed a hand over my face. Maybe my patience was already thin because of Laney, but I couldn’t handle more than this with my mom. Not now.
“Are you going to stop talking to me?” she asked, her voice low.
“Mom, she’s just not calling you back as fast as you want. I’m not going to stop talking to you.”
She twisted her hands together. “Could you tell Sophie that?”
I shook my head. “You need to handle this.”
Her eyes widened a little, as if I’d stepped over some invisible line.
“I can’t be the go-between forever.”
She was motionless for a few beats before she nodded, almost to herself. “Okay. You’re right. I’m sorry. I should’ve been more open with you about it before. He hurt all of us, and maybe I didn’t know how to protect you, but pretending it didn’t happen has only hurt more,” she added softly.
Something shifted at that moment. I’d needed her to acknowledge reality for years. I was no expert, but I understood she’d been caught in what probably felt like an impossible situation. I knew it wasn’t easy or safe for a woman to exit an abusive relationship.
“I get what you went through,” I said, my voice weary.
“I do. I know what Dad was like. I know you were caught in his vortex too.” Her shoulders trembled.
“But we were kids,” I continued. “Sophie’s still carrying that.
I am too, some days. I know you can’t change the past. You just have to acknowledge it.
I love you,” I said. “I’m always going to be here for you.
But right now, you’re just going to have to stumble through this with her,” I finished.
“She loves you. She’s just hurt, and she’s tired of pretending everything is fine. ”
My mother stayed quiet, and I knew she was waiting for more. For once, I did not rush in to smooth it over.